What the Future May Hold
by Marione
Summary: Hermione will never discover what her future may hold, unless she lets go of the secrets of her past. When she finally comes to terms with the truth, will she find the happiness she desires? SSHG R rating for later chapters.
1. Prologue Without a Single Goodbye

Author's Note: I hope you enjoy my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Prologue ~ "Without a Single Goodbye"  
  
**********  
  
(June)  
  
The glorious early summer day was one of celebration on the grounds of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. A bittersweet moment for many who, after yesterday's commencement ceremonies, would be leaving the school for good and setting out to begin the next phase of life's journey the following morning. Sad to be leaving friends behind and departing the place that they called home for seven years, but anticipating the prospect of what the future may hold... a future that was so much brighter now that they did not live in the shadow of the greatest evil of their time. Yes, nearly six weeks earlier, Voldemort had finally been vanquished... this time, for good.  
  
One young witch sat alone by the lake, for the first time in her life unsure about her future. Only weeks before, she was eager to take on the world. Now, she only wanted to find refuge from the world that had turned on her so cruelly, a world that she would be facing alone.   
  
Sitting beneath the topaz sky, watching as the sun began to sink lower in the horizon, arms wrapped around the knees pulled tightly to her chest, and oblivious to the sounds of celebrating on the school grounds all around her as she tearfully sat in silent contemplation, she was unaware of the approach of the only two people who mattered until they knelt down, one on either side, and silently gathered her into a gentle hug. No words were spoken as the trio embraced, staying that way until the sun set. Only when the brilliant orb was no longer visible beyond the trees and the horizon blazed in brilliant shades of orange and purple, did she break the silence.  
  
"Whatever will I do without you guys?" she sobbed.  
  
The embrace tightened on both sides of her as they spoke the only words of comfort they knew that they could offer.  
  
"We'll always be here for you", they assured her.  
  
"I don't know how I'll get through the next year while we're apart."  
  
For the following day, they would all board the Hogwarts Express one final time, and go their separate ways. Harry and Ron to The Burrow for a week with the Weasley family, before setting off for Auror training. Hermione, to an empty house in London.  
  
"You're all I've got left in this world," she choked out through her tears.  
  
After Voldemort's defeat, she had felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Over the past couple of years, the attacks on the families of Muggle born witches and wizards had become more frequent, and more deadly. The last year, especially, she had grown increasingly worried about the safety of her home and her parents. Now, with Voldemort dead and gone, she was anticipating returning home for the first carefree summer she would have had in recent years, and vacationing with her parents before beginning University next semester.   
  
Until one evening last week, when the car in which her parents were travelling home from work was involved in a tragic accident, and her carefree holiday cut short by a drunk driver before it even began. Her father had been killed instantly. Her mother, critically injured. Days passed before word came that her mother would indeed live, but would have a long road to recovery ahead of her. Months of intense therapy ahead before, if ever, she would walk again.  
  
Her professors had talked Hermione into staying until the end of term. Her parents wouldn't have wanted her to miss her exams and graduation, they had convinced her. Besides, there was nothing she could do for her mother while the woman was flittering in and out of consciousness.  
  
"I'll miss you..." she sobbed again, before turning away from her friends and running back to the castle, seeking the solitude of the Head Girl's dorm, unable to face the two boys any longer and dreading the next day's final goodbyes.  
  
*****  
  
"Miss Granger!" the voice of Professor McGonagall rang through the corridor as Hermione approached her dormitory.  
  
"Yes, Professor?"  
  
Her beloved head of house handed her a handkerchief as she approached. Reaching out and patting her favorite student soothingly on the back, she asked, "Would you please accompany me to the Headmaster's office? We have something we would like to discuss with you."  
  
"Certainly, Professor", she answered, "and thank you..." as she dabbed the handkerchief at her tearstained face.  
  
"Please, dear child, take your time if you feel the need to freshen up first."  
  
"No thank you, Professor. I shall be fine."  
  
"Very well," replied Professor McGonagall, as she gently placed her arm around Hermione's shoulder and led her away.  
  
*****  
  
Upon entering the Headmaster's office, Hermione noted the presence of a few other professors. Professors Vector, Flitwick, and Snape were all seated around the desk, apparently anticipating her arrival.  
  
"Miss Granger! Thank you for joining us. Please take a seat," Professor Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as he extended his hand and offered her a lemon drop.  
  
"No thank you," Hermione resplied quietly as she nodded her head towards the proffered sweets, before sinking into the comfort of the nearest armchair and asking, "You wanted to speak with me, sir?"  
  
"Yes, my dear. As you may be aware, not only have you graduated at the top of your class, you have earned more credits here than any student on record at this institution. And though I do not have the final N.E.W.T results, I do have contacts who report that your scores may very well be the highest in Hogwart's history."  
  
The news, which only weeks ago would have sent her spirit soaring, only left her feeling numb. For, as hard as she strived for seven years to achieve this goal, what did grades matter now? They wouldn't bring her father back... they wouldn't heal her mother... they wouldn't...   
  
She got lost in her thoughts as she stared blankly at the headmaster, only turning away from him when she heard Professor McGonagall speak up next.  
  
"We are aware that you've plenty of options to consider regarding furthering your education, but those of us gathered in this room would also like to extend you the offer to return to Hogwart's, to take on an apprenticeship with one of us."  
  
Shocked, Hermione looked around in turn from Dumbledore's twinkling eyes, to McGonagall's face which was gleaming with pride, Flitwick's ear to ear grin, Vector's nod of encouragement, and Snape's intense gaze. Jumping out of her seat, she stuttered, "I-I-I.... I c-can't. I'm sorry..." holding back her sobs as she ran out of the office, she ran directly to her dorm to pack her belongings.  
  
She could not stay, and she would not return.  
  
For earlier that night, sitting by the lake, she had come to a realization, and she could not bear for anyone to know her shame.   
  
She left that night, without a single goodbye. 


	2. You've Got a Friend in Me

Author's Note: Thank you to my readers and reviewers. All questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 1 ~ "You've got a friend in me"  
  
(October)  
  
The young woman hastily entered the Leaky Cauldron from the streets of Muggle London, hoping to successfully pass through the pub relatively unnoticed as she had done earlier that day, and several times before. Passing the bar, she stumbled into a man who, at that moment, was rising from his seat at a nearby table.  
  
"Excuse me, miss," he apologized as he helped to steady her on her feet.  
  
"That's quite alright, sir," she replied quietly, keeping her eyes averted as she turned to continue her way through the pub.  
  
"Hermione?" the man asked quietly.  
  
Recognizing the familiar voice, slowly she looked up into the gentle gaze of her former professor, mentor, and friend, Remus Lupin.  
  
"Hello Professor Lupin," she greeted him with a shy smile, trying to avoid direct eye contact.  
  
"Hello, indeed! Is that all you have to say to an old friend? After disappearing without a word to anyone last summer? Don't you know how worried we all have been?" Remus exclaimed as he reached out to welcome her with a warm embrace.   
  
Hermione stiffened at the contact. Not that she wasn't glad to see him, or that his fatherly embrace was unwelcome, but she was afraid of him discovering her secret.  
  
Too late.   
  
Suddenly, Remus knew why she had hidden herself away, for though it was unnoticable at a glance, upon close contact it was obvious that she was concealing a slight bulge beneath her robes.   
  
Holding on to her shoulders as he stepped back an armslength, he tried to make eye contact with the young woman.  
  
"Hermione?" he asked gently, "Is there anything you would like to talk about?"  
  
She once again averted her gaze, and her voice trembled as she implored with a sob, "Please, Professor..."  
  
"It's Remus, Hermione," he corrected her gently, "I've just finished lunch, but please, won't you join me for tea?"  
  
He pulled out a chair and held her arm gently as she eased herself into her seat. "Thank you, Profess... er, Remus."  
  
"Now, what can I get for you?"  
  
"Just tea, please, Remus," she replied as she nervously glanced around, hoping that she would not have to face any other old acquaintances that day.  
  
They sat in silence for a while as they drank their tea, before Remus finally reached out and squeezed her hand in encouragement, "Hermione, you know that I've always loved Harry as I would a nephew, and by extension, you as a niece. If you need someone to talk to, you can confide in me. It can't be easy going through this alone."  
  
She squeezed his hand in return, and her eyes misted over as she finally met his gaze. He was right. She couldn't continue this charade alone, and she knew that she could trust him.  
  
"Thank you, Remus. But please, not now," she begged quietly as her eyes darted around the room, "not... here."  
  
"I understand." he nodded, his eyes full of understanding, "Would you kindly allow me to escort you home? I'm sorry to have caused you distress, and I would worry, knowing that you are out there alone."  
  
Hermione nodded as Remus stood, holding out a hand and and helping her to her feet. He offered her his arm, and she lightly held on and allowed him to escort her home.  
  
******************  
  
They disapparated out of Diagon Alley, to a quaint little cottage nestled in the woods not far from the outskirts of Hogsmeade. They entered into a modest, yet comfortable living room. With a sigh of relief, Hermione curled her feet up underneath her as she sat on the sofa, and invited Remus to take a seat in one of the armchairs in front of the fireplace, as she used her wand to light a fire.  
  
"How have you been feeling, Hermione?"  
  
"Incredible, actually. I've never felt better!" She smiled slightly before she continued, "I was in London today... I am seeing a doctor at a Muggle Clinic, as I didn't want anyone in the Wizarding world to know..."  
  
He looked intently at her, as the silent tears began to roll down her cheeks.  
  
"Why, Hermione? Why did you run? Why not tell anybody?"  
  
At this, she quickly stood and began to pace, "Oh yes, I could just hear it now... 'Smart, sensible Hermione Granger, most brilliant student in Hogwarts' history, dumped after a one-night-stand... forgets to take her morning after potion'..."  
  
"Please, Remus... understand that I do not need to hear the gossip about 'Hogwarts' Head Girl and her bastard child'. Especially when the father doesn't even remember..." she broke off suddenly, plopping heavily back onto the sofa before leaning forward and staring deep into the fire.  
  
"Doesn't remember what?" Remus asked incredulously.  
  
She sighed and whispered hoarsely, "He probably doesn't even remember my name."  
  
Sensing that asking "Who?" would be too personal at this time, Remus simply stated, "Surely, you don't believe that."  
  
He stared at Hermione intently, trying to see the truth in her eyes, but she continued to stare into the fire, and muttered, "No, I don't believe it... I know it."  
  
Not wanting to push her too far, he tried to steer the subject in another direction.  
  
"Hermione... what about your education?"  
  
At this, she sobbed, "How am I supposed to continue with my education when I'll soon have a child to raise?"  
  
As she slumped back into her seat, she broke down and cried, "My father is gone, my mother is not well, and I'm all alone!"  
  
"Now I'm eighteen, I have access to the trust fund that my parents set up years ago, intended for my education, but at my disposal to do as I please. All those years of planning my future, and now here I am, using the money to rent a shabby cottage in the middle of nowhere, soon to raise a child on my own."  
  
"I've come to terms with my... situation," she paused for a moment as her hands gently began to caress her swelling abdomen, "and I have grown to love this baby already. But I'm scared! What happens when the money runs out? I've got no family, I've got no job, and now I've got no future..."  
  
Remus quickly moved to her side, gently taking her into a fatherly embrace, as she rested her head on his shoulder and sobbed into his robes.  
  
"You're not alone, Hermione. You'll never be alone. You have a friend in me... please, let me help you."  
  
At this, she embraced him tightly, the last embers of the fire dying as she finally cried herself to sleep. Remus lifted her into his arms, and carried her to her bedroom where he lay her on her bed, and tucked her in tightly under a faded patchwork quilt before leaving her alone for the night. 


	3. I'll Be There

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
Chapter 2 ~ "I'll be there"  
  
(November)  
  
Early one afternoon a few weeks later, Hermione answered a knock at her door only to find the friendly face of Remus Lupin smiling warmly at her. He had made a habit of dropping in over the weekends to spend time with her, but this was the first time he'd come by on a weekday afternoon, as he had resumed his teaching position at Hogwarts this year, and his afternoons were usually spent instructing his Defense Against the Dark Arts classes.  
  
"Remus! What are you doing here?" she asked with a smile... the first real smile he had seen since their first meeting a few weeks ago.  
  
"I have the rest of the day free of classes, and I thought I'd drop by and see if you would like an escort to your clinic in London. Of course, if that's too personal..."  
  
"No, Remus. I'd be happy for an escort. I'm due for an ultrasound, and I'd be glad for some company."  
  
"Ultrasound?"  
  
"Yes, it is a procedure that allows you to see an image of the baby. To make sure that he or she is developing properly. I'm not anticipating any problems, I've already heard the baby's heartbeat and had the routine bloodwork done, and everything looks good but it will be nice to have someone there, just in case..."  
  
"Of course, I'd be honored to be with you for the first glimpse of your little one..."  
  
"We might even be able to find out if it is a boy or a girl! Though, I'm not sure I want to know yet," she laughed.  
  
"Why not?" he asked with a lift of his eyebrow.  
  
"I like surprises. I think I'd rather wait until the baby is born. Besides, what if they're wrong?" she laughed again.  
  
Merlin, it was good to hear her laugh.  
  
*****  
  
They apparated into Diagon Alley and proceeded, relatively unnoticed, through the Leaky Cauldron and emerged onto the streets of Muggle London. Though there was a slight chill in the air, the weather was still quite warm for that time of year, and the sun shone brilliantly in the cloudless blue sky as they made their way to the Medical Clinic where Hermione was due for her pre-natal exam.  
  
"Where to, Hermione?"  
  
"Just this way. It's not far, and I prefer to walk... if you don't mind. The exercise will do me good," she smiled.  
  
"That's fine. There's nothing I prefer more than a walk with a beautiful young girl on a lovely fall afternoon," he teased as she took his arm.  
  
They walked in silence for a while, before Remus asked, "How's your Mum?"  
  
She smiled at this, "Mum's doing much better. She is making such wonderful progress. Her physical therapist thinks that, in time, she will be able to walk again."  
  
"That's wonderful news, Hermione!" he exclaimed and he squeezed her hand as she turned a corner and led him into the clinic.  
  
Inside the clinic a short time later, Remus held Hermione's hand as the doctor pointed to the shadowy black and white image of the fetus, "There's the baby's head... that's the spine... hands... feet... lungs..." he continued as he pointed out other developing limbs and organs, "and right there," he pointed to a flickering shadow on the screen, "that is your baby's heart."  
  
Hermione smiled as she watched the fluttering of her baby's heart, and the doctor asked with a grin, "Would you like to know the gender of your child?"  
  
She hesitated only a moment before answering, "No, I don't think so. I'll find out soon enough, won't I?"  
  
"Indeed, you will!", he laughed before pointing out, "look, the baby is sucking it's thumb! And, oh my, the little dear is tap dancing on your bladder."  
  
Hermione laughed, "It's no wonder I've got to visit the loo every five minutes."  
  
"Well, Miss Granger, everything appears to be just fine with your baby. I think we're done now, so if you'd like to get dressed and visit the facilities..." he pointed the way to the bathroom, and with a smile, he left the room.  
  
"That was absolutely amazing, Hermione!" said Remus, his eyes full of wonder, "Thank you so much for letting me share the experience with you."  
  
"No, Remus... Thank YOU. For everything," she replied with tears in her eyes. "Oh dear, there I go, getting all hormonal on you."  
  
He laughed and gently squeezed her shoulder in response, before leaving her to get dressed.  
  
*****  
  
When they found themselves back on the streets of London after leaving the clinic that afternoon, Hermione turned to Remus and smiled, "Remus, if you don't mind, I would like to visit my mother before we leave London," she paused before continuing, "but if you don't have time, you can go on ahead without me, and I will see you later."  
  
"It's fine, Hermione. I am free for the day, so I'd be glad to go with you," he assured her.  
  
Hermione sighed in relief, "Thank you ever so much, Remus. Even though Mum is doing better, it is so emotionally draining for me to see her like that. I feel much better knowing that I won't have to walk home alone afterwards."  
  
They continued their walk to the rehab facility where her mother would be staying for the duration of her recuperation, and upon their arrival Remus insisted on staying in the lobby while Hermione spent some time alone with her mother. He found an empty seat and took interest in the Muggle news report that was airing on the television, while Hermione made her way down the corridor.  
  
"Mum?" she called as she opened the door to her mother's room.  
  
"Hermione!" Her mother cried when she saw her daughter enter the room. "Darling, what a surprise! I miss you so much..." her eyes filled with tears as Hermione leaned over the bed and gently gathered her mother into in her arms.  
  
"How are you doing, Mum?"  
  
"I'm making progress, dear. I won't say it's easy. It's damn hard, going through this without your father by my side. But I'm getting there," she replied with a weak smile.  
  
"I'm sorry I haven't been around more, Mum... it's just that..." Hermione broke off, unsure how to continue.  
  
"I know, dear. You're studies are important. Just work hard, do well, and continue to make me proud!"  
  
Hermione looked guiltily down to the floor. She still hadn't told her mother that she wasn't attending University, or the circumstances involved in her decision. She didn't want to burden her mother with any more worries. She was greatful that the long coat she was wearing covered her bulge, but she felt terrible about the deception.  
  
"Did you come alone, dear? I worry about you wandering the city by yourself," her mother frowned in concern.  
  
"No, mum. A friend escorted me. I had other business to attend to today, and he offered to accompany me."  
  
"A friend? A... boyfriend?" her mother asked with a mischievous grin as she winked at Hermione.  
  
"No, mum." Hermione blushed at the thought, "One of my old professors. He was a dear friend of Harry's father, sort of an uncle to Harry, and has become somewhat of a father figure to me recently," she replied quietly.  
  
"And do you intend to introduce me to this 'old professor'?"  
  
Hermione nodded and left the room, returning moments later with Remus trailing behind her.  
  
"Dr. Granger. It's a pleasure to meet you," Remus smiled as he took her hand, "though, I am very sorry about the circumstances."  
  
"Thank you, Professer. It is a pleasure to meet you as well."  
  
"Please, call me Remus."  
  
"Thank you, Remus. Please, call me Elizabeth. And thank you for watching out for Hermione. Make sure that she takes care of herself... she's all I have left," she continued tearfully.  
  
"That, I will do," Remus replied with an encouraging smile as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze, "and now, I should be going. You look as though you could use some rest."  
  
"I love you, Mum!" Hermione sobbed as she embraced her mother, "I must be on my way as well, but I promise to try to visit again soon."  
  
"I love you too, dear. Study hard... make me proud..."  
  
Hermione simply smiled in reply, as she followed Remus out of the room.  
  
"You haven't told her, have you?" he inquired.  
  
"Remus... how can I? Doesn't she have enough to deal with already?" Hermione sighed regretfully.  
  
Remus didn't answer, frowning in concern as he took her arm and escorted her home.   
  
*****  
  
Remus stayed at Hermione's cottage for the remainder of the afternoon, sharing an early dinner with her before returning to the school.  
  
"Hermione, I worry about you being alone. I know that your pregnancy is progressing fine, but if something were to happen..." he hesitated before he continued, "it's just that you're so far away from your clinic, and aren't in contact with anyone besides me."  
  
He reached into his pocket, and withdrew a ring mounted with a small round crystal, which he place in the palm of her hand, holding a slightly larger crystal orb is his own hand.  
  
"I charmed these crystals for you to use as a method of contacting me if there is an emergency."  
  
She placed the ring on a finger of her right hand, and gasped in surprise when crystal in her ring swirled a misty yellow.  
  
"Yellow indicates perfect health and happiness," Remus smiled.  
  
"It reminds me of a cross between a Muggle mood ring and a remembrall!" she laughed, before she noticed that Remus' crystal also swirled with the same yellow mist.  
  
"The changing color will range from shades of yellow to orange and then red if you need assistance, the deepest of reds indicating an emergency. I'll carry mine in my pocket at all times, and it will grow increasingly warmer depending on the color."  
  
"I'll be there," he assured her, placing a kiss on her temple, "whenever you need me."  
  
She embraced him fondly, before bidding him goodnight and settling down on the sofa before the fire, smiling as she watched the yellow mist swirling through the crystal on her finger.  
  
Only a few short weeks ago she didn't think it possible, but now she was, for the first time in many months, perfectly happy. 


	4. In Your Eyes

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
Chapter 3 ~ "In Your Eyes"  
  
(December)  
  
Remus continued to visit Hermione's cottage regularly, helping her to prepare a place for the baby, escorting her to London for her check-ups when it didn't interfere with his classes, taking her to visit her mother, and even shopping, where he would sit and wait patiently in the shops as Hermione picked out clothing and other items for the baby.  
  
The crystals continued to swirl a misty yellow nearly every day. On the morning of their last visit to London, Remus had felt a slight warmth in his pocket, and frowned when he saw the mist in the crystal orb darken to a deep golden yellow, and he headed off to Hermione's cottage early to check on her. He entered to find her staring into the fireplace, her face tearstained, before she turned to speak quietly to him.  
  
"Today's the day I tell Mum."  
  
He moved to sqeeze her shoulder and assured her that it would be alright. They had discussed it after the last visit to Hermione's mother, Elizabeth, and Hermione had come to the conclusion that she not only should not, but could not continue to hide her condition from her mother any longer.  
  
As it turned out, it was the right decision.  
  
Elizabeth, though shocked at the news and slightly disappointed that Hermione would not be following through with her education, took it well and was supportive of her daughter's decisions. It took some time to sink in, but eventually the announcement that she was to be a grandmother gave her the extra bit of motivation that she needed to get back on her feet again. She had recently begun standing with the aid of a walker, and had even taken a few steps with great difficulty. She was now more determined than ever to take those same steps independently, laughing that she would soon be wanting to take the baby on walks through the park and vowing that she would not do it in a wheelchair.  
  
Elizabeth was concerned that Hermione didn't venture to speak of her baby's father, and the woman began to eye Remus suspiciously before Hermione finally spoke up and assured her mother that Remus was only a friend. Over the past few weeks, Elizabeth had truly grown fond of Remus when he accompanied Hermione to visit. One one hand, she was relieved to know that a man nearly her own age was not responsible for her daughter's condition. On the other hand, she knew that Remus was one of the kindest, gentlest men that she had ever known, and that he would have made a wonderful father. She smiled at the thought, reminding herself that Remus had already become a father figure to Hermione, and would probably be like a grandfather to the baby. With Hermione's own father gone, Elizabeth could think of no better man to stand in as a grandfather to her own grandchild than Remus Lupin.  
  
*****  
  
Christmas was quickly approaching, and a few weeks later a majority of the students had headed home for the holiday.  
  
The day the students left was also the day of the full moon, and it was late in the afternoon as Remus hurried to the dungeons and knocked on the door of the Potions Master's office.   
  
"Enter!" came the deep voice of Severus Snape.  
  
"Good day, Severus," Remus said pleasantly as he opened the door.  
  
"Lupin," Severus replied with a slight nod of his head, indicating that Remus' potion was sitting on the desk, without looking up from the essays that he was grading.  
  
Remus picked up the smoking goblet and after drinking the contents replied, "Thank you, Severus. You don't know how much I appreciate..." he stopped mid sentence and gasped in shock, causing Severus to look up from his work curiously as Remus reached into the pocket of his robe and withdrew a blood red crystal, crying out, "No... Not now. It's too soon!"  
  
"Lupin? Is something wrong?" Severus asked, raising his eyebrow as he feigned concern.  
  
Remus checked the time on his pocket watch as the crystal grew increasingly hot in his hand, and lamented, "There's not enough time!"  
  
"Not enough time for what?" Severus arched the other eyebrow.  
  
Remus paced as he considered his next course of action. It was obvious to him, with the full moon just a few hours away, that he couldn't go alone, yet he didn't want to betray Hermione's trust by revealing her secret to another.  
  
**She needs help! Better to betray her trust than deny her the assistance that you may not be able to give her tonight!** He thought to himself, as he quickly made his decision.  
  
"Severus, somebody needs my help, but tonight is the full moon. I'll need you to come with me. It's urgent. Possibly a matter of life and death." Remus blurted out the words so quickly that Severus couldn't make sense of it.  
  
"Lupin, unless you stop this incessant rambling and tell me what is going on, I am going nowhere with you," Severus sneered.  
  
"Listen, Snape, THERE. IS. NO. TIME!" Remus replied urgently, pausing for a deep breath before continuing, "Please, just grab your emergency medicinal potions and come with me! I'll explain on the way."  
  
Severus relented with a sigh, "Very well. But I promise you, Lupin, if there is not a good explanation behind this, next month you can forget about your bloody wolfsbane..."  
  
"Fine! Just... come!"   
  
*****  
  
Remus apprised Severus of the situation as the Potions Master gathered his emergency supplies. Due to his past as a Death Eater and a spy, he long ago developed the habit of keeping vials of healing potions in the inner pockets of his robe at all times, and other emergency supplies in easy access in his private lab, so he was able to gather what he needed quickly before the two men rushed out of the castle and down to the gates, which was the closest point where they would be able to apparate to Hermione's cottage. Upon entering her home, they found the unconscious form of the young woman slumped to the floor in a small pool of blood tinged fluid, which was darkening in color as the flow of blood steadily increased.  
  
"Merlin! What's happening?" Remus cried.  
  
Severus kneeled down beside Hermione to examine her, "When is she due, Lupin?"  
  
"Not for another six weeks!"  
  
"I'm afraid that this child is intent on entering the world today. Not only is she bleeding, but her water has broken, and there is no time to get her the help she needs."  
  
He looked up and met Remus's concerned eyes, "We're going to have to deliver this child."  
  
Remus scooped Hermione up into his arms, and carried her to her bed as Severus gathered some clean towels and set some water to boil.  
  
"We need to wake her, Lupin. I've not done this before, but I am reasonably certain that we can not deliver this child without her help."  
  
"Ennervate!" Remus cried as he pointed his wand at Hermione's still form.  
  
Hermione's eyes fluttered open as she murmered, "Remus? What's going on? The pain... It happened so fast... hurt so much. I was so worried... so scared... "  
  
"Shhhh, child... you need to save your energy," he soothed as he wiped her brow with a cool washcloth that Severus handed to him, "the baby is on it's way, and you'll need your strength."  
  
"Severus, the moon..." Remus fretted as he shot a glance out the window to the darkening sky.  
  
"Yes, Lupin. I know. But you've got time yet. It looks as though this child is going to make an entrance any minute. The head appears to be crowning as we speak."  
  
"What should I do?"  
  
"Support her from behind while she pushes. Considering the amount of blood that she lost before we arrived, I doubt she has enough strength to do it on her own."  
  
"Do you hear that, Hermione? It's time to push. You can do this!" He encouraged her as he sat behind her, supporting her back and holding her hand.  
  
"Miss Granger," Severus urged her firmly, yet gently, "Lupin... er... Remus is behind you. Lean on him until you're ready, then push!"  
  
Hermione mustered enough strength for one hard push, before slumping back against Remus, nearly passing out again. Remus continued dabbing her brow with the cool washcloth, while gently murmuring words of encouragement as she slowly tried to muster enough strength for another push.  
  
"She's so weak. I don't know if she'll make it through the next one, Severus."  
  
"The baby is small, Lupin. She has already delivered the head. If she can manage one more push like the last, and deliver the shoulders, I should be able to help her from there."  
  
"Hear that, Hermione? Just one more big push. You can do it. Come on, child! It's time to find out if you've got a son or a daughter!"  
  
And with that, the Granger determination kicked in as Hermione gave one more long hard push and felt the baby slide from her body before she passed out.  
  
"Hermione!"  
  
"Let her rest, Lupin. Her son is here," Severus stated as he quickly inspected the form of the tiny infant that he held delicately in his large hands.  
  
Remus slowly eased the girl back onto the bed, smiling as he brushed a few stray locks of hair from her forehead and placing a gentle kiss on her brow before he walked away to assist Severus with the infant.  
  
"How is he?"  
  
"Despite being premature, he seems to be fine, though quite small," he said as he handed the baby to Remus, "as for Miss Granger, I will be able to stop the hemmoraging, but she's lost a lot of blood and will likely be quite weak for a while. They will both need to be examined by a professional in the morning, but for now let's get them both cleaned up and let Miss Granger get some rest. If you'll take care of the baby, I'll tend to his mother."  
  
Severus muttered a cooling charm over the boiling water, retrieved his healing potions and salves, and the two men began tending to mother and child.  
  
Remus bathed the baby, smiling as he counted fingers and toes before diapering him and wrapping him in a warm, fluffy towel. He rummaged through the selection of infant clothing that Hermione had bought just recently, searching for something that would not be too large for the tiny infant. To his relief, Hermione had purchased a variety of infant nightgowns that would be quite easy to slip the child into. He hadn't handled a baby since Harry was one, and even then he had never had to dress a newborn. His gentle hands maneuvered the soft cotton gown over the baby's head, and after pulling the arms through one at a time and tucking the tiny feet into the bottom of the gown, Remus smiled in satisfaction as he admired the end result. The baby finally clothed, Remus wrapped him snugly in a warm receiving blanket before sitting down beside the bed, waiting for Hermione to regain consciousness so he could introduce her to her son. Merely a few moments later, her eyes fluttered open, and she asked weakly, "My baby..."  
  
"Your son," smiled Remus.  
  
He handed the baby over to Hermione and sat behind her, supporting her once more so she could hold her son to her breast.  
  
"My son," she smiled as she began to drift off to sleep. She briefly caught a glimpse of the newborn's wide-eyed stare, "Oh!" she exclaimed quietly, looking up at Severus through the dark lashes of her heavy eyelids, "He's got your eyes," she muttered faintly as she slipped into unconsciousness. 


	5. Reflections

Author's Note: Hello everybody! I will try to keep this brief, as I know how tedious it can be to scroll through rambling author's notes. I just wanted to thank all of those who are reading my story. I was amazed to see how many hits I've had so far. However, I don't know if I should take the lack of reviews as "No News is Good News", or "If You Can't Say Anything Nice, Don't Say Anything At All". I'm not one to beg for reviews, and I intend to continue the story regardless. However, as this is my first attempt at fanfic, I would appreciate some input ~ whether good or bad. If you could just take a minute and give me a "Thumbs Up", or a "Thumbs Down" in a review, it would be greatly appreciated.  
  
Oh, and just one more note. I am having trouble with Word documents and HTML, so I keep losing my formatting. Where I had intended to use italics to indicate Severus's thoughts later in this chapter, I have instead used ***asterisks*** to indicate internal dialogue.  
  
Thank you again for reading... now, on with our story.  
  
*****  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
Chapter 4 ~ "Reflections"  
  
"He's got your eyes," she had said as she looked at Severus before falling asleep.  
  
Remus gaped at Severus in shock, as Severus looked on at Hermione in confusion.  
  
"Clearly, the trauma of birth has rendered the girl delusional. Whoever IS the baby's father, by the way?" he asked, eyeing Remus suspiciously.  
  
"It's not for me to tell, even if I knew, Severus. I'm her moral support only," Remus replied as he removed the baby from Hermione's arms and gently placed him in the cradle at Hermione's bedside.  
  
"If you insist, Lupin," Severus replied dryly, sounding thoroughly unconvinced.  
  
Remus was fighting to keep his temper in check. Fatigue over the evening's events, coupled with concern over Hermione and the baby, only increased the agitation that he was feeling with the rise of the moon. "Look, Snape, I've got a date with the moon tonight, in case you have forgotten," he snapped.   
  
He took a few calming breaths before continuing, "She needs someone to stay with her now, Severus. It can't be me, so it will have to be you. Besides, I think the two of you may need to have a little chat."  
  
"Just what are you implying, Lupin?"  
  
"The same that you were implying of me, Snape!" Remus whispered sharply as he turned away and rushed out of the house.  
  
*****  
  
Severus managed to change the bedsheets and discreetly redress Hermione in a clean nightgown with a few flicks of his wand. Satisfied that she could now rest comfortably, Severus sat down in a chair close to the cradle and looked down at the sleeping infant, wondering who Hermione might have seen in the child's eyes.  
  
The baby's eyes were closed, so Severus focused his other features.   
  
A small patch of silky black hair. That could be anybody. Certainly not a Weasley, but maybe Potter.  
  
**'No, not Potter. That bloody Gryffindor is too noble to abandon a pregnant girlfriend. Unless she never told him. But why would she NOT tell him? Surely, she would have known that Potter would "do the right thing".**  
  
It just didn't add up. Besides, Severus was fairly certain that Granger and Potter had no relationship aside from an extraordinary friendship.  
  
His eyes traveled down the boy's face, lingering briefly in contemplation over the sleeping eyes, before moving his gaze down to the child's nose.   
  
**'Well, not much to tell there. It is a baby nose. No definite shape yet, though maybe just slightly... large, for a baby nose, and a premature one at that! But what do I know of baby noses? It's not as though I've ever seen one.'**  
  
The child stirred and finally opened his eyes. Ah yes... the eyes. Now he could take a good look at them.   
  
Somewhere, Severus had heard, or more likely had read, that babies often have blue eyes at birth, changing color as they age. These eyes were indeed blue, but not the typical light baby blue he had heard of. As he looked down, he found two deep, dark orbs staring directly back at him. Sapphire eyes that would surely darken to near black as the child aged. He observed also the familiar shape and set of the eyes.  
  
Hermione was right. They were HIS eyes.  
  
Stunned, he sat in silence, staring at the child. As the baby began to fuss, Severus gently lifted him out of the cradle.  
  
"Who ARE you?" he asked the child.   
  
At the sound of Severus' voice, tiny hands and feet began to flail, kicking the receiving blanket loose from around the tiny body. Severus carefully unwrapped the child and the newborn instinctively worked on finding his thumb, sucking vigorously once he managed to get it into his mouth. Severus gently placed his own thumb in the palm of the infant's other hand, holding it gently as he inspected the tiny fingers. Those hands look familiar, he thought as he glanced down at his own hands. **'MY hands.'**  
  
His hands. His eyes. That silky black hair.  
  
The child, indeed, resembled a Snape.  
  
"How?" he whispered quietly.  
  
*****  
  
The sound of the baby wailing a short time later woke Hermione from her short slumber. Severus approached the bed, delivering the child into his mother's arms.  
  
"I do believe he is hungry," he said.  
  
"Thank you, Professor," She replied, avoiding his intense gaze as she unbuttoned the top of her nightgown, lowering the material down over one shoulder so she could hold the baby to her breast. She smiled nervously as she leaned back against the pillows, closing her eyes a few moments later after the baby succesfully latched on and began to suckle contently.  
  
Giving the new family a few minutes of privacy, Severus busied himself mixing a potion to administer to Hermione, a blood replenishing potion with a mild pain reliever and a sleeping draught. He gently supported her head as he urged her to drink, then sat back and watched mother and son through those first precious moments of bonding.  
  
"Miss Granger?" he asked hesitantly a short time later, as he noticed that the infant, now satiated by his mother's milk, was beginning to drift of to sleep as he continued to suckle.  
  
"Yes, Professor?" Hermione replied sleepily.  
  
"Perhaps... Is there... something that you would like to tell me?"  
  
At this, her eyes flew open. She looked around the room nervously before closing them again and replying, "Whatever are you trying to ask me, Professor?"  
  
"Miss Granger, you mentioned something peculiar about your child before you fell asleep. Something about his eyes. Something about MY eyes."  
  
A single tear slid down her cheek, as Hermione continued nursing her child in silence, her eyes closed as she contemplated her answer.   
  
She knew it was time. She had never intended to tell him, but now he was here and she realized that it was inevitable. She swallowed hard and replied in a weak voice, "Yes, I think I may remember saying something to that effect."  
  
"And why would you dare to make such a comparison?"  
  
Brown eyes met black, as she looked at him and flatly stated, "Because, Professor, you are his father."  
  
He bowed his head into his hands momentarily, reeling from this seemingly impossible revelation, though sensing that it was, somehow, true.  
  
"Would you care to explain to me, Miss Granger, how I am to believe that I possibly fathered this child, when we never..." he paused for a moment, not knowing how to continue his line of questioning.  
  
"That is, I do not recall an act that would have resulted in our conceiving a child together," he finally stated.  
  
"Professor, I..." she began in a choked voice. Realizing that, in her weakened condition, Hermione did not have the strength to continue, he decided not to press her for answers tonight. Yes, he wanted the to know the truth, but he'd wait, just to assure that he received the full and honest truth from the girl. It could wait until morning, when the sleeping draught would wear off.  
  
"Get some rest, Miss Granger," he spoke as he lifted the sleeping child from her arms and placed him back into the cradle, "we can continue this discussion in the morning."  
  
*****  
  
Severus once again seated himself in the chair beside the cradle for the next few hours, keeping vigil over the sleeping infant and contemplating the mysteries of life.  
  
When he first assessed the situation at the cottage that night, Severus was looking forward, from a biological standpoint, to assisting in childbirth. He'd always been curious about the birthing process. And during the delivery, that's all he felt... a clinical sense of curiosity. But now, sitting here contemplating the night's events, he was overwhelmed by the feeling of wonder, that HE had delivered a life into this world. And not only did he help deliver this perfect creature, he may have been responsible for creating the child in the first place. After being responsible for taking so many lives in his dark past, he had now, possibly in more ways than one, taken part in the miracle of life.  
  
In his lifetime, Severus had never known love. He had an abusive childhood, grew up with no true friends, and then spent a few years in the company Death Eaters, entering into service to the Dark Lord as a young adult before turning spy for the Order. All of his adult life, he never allowed himself to love. Partially out of fear for the safety of the unfortunate soul that might make the mistake caring about him, but more so out of guilt and shame for the sins that he committed during his service to Voldemort. He knew that he did not deserve love, so he convinced himself that he did not need or want love.  
  
Looking down at this child in wonder, he could not hold back the flood of new emotion rushing through his soul. The longer he watched the sleeping infant, the stronger those feelings grew. Could this truly be his son? He could not allow himself to admit to the strange and wonderful emotions that this child stirred within him until he knew for sure. Yet, he couldn't help feeling protective over the tiny being that was sleeping before him.  
  
When the child stirred once again and began to cry, Severus could not resist lifting him out of the cradle and holding him gently in his arms. Consciously, he did not know how to comfort the child, yet he instinctively cradled the child to his chest and began to murmer soothingly as he moved to sit in the rocking chair by the window, and rocked the child to sleep under the soft glow of the moonlight that was beaming through the window.  
  
He was unaware of the soft brown eyes gazing at him in awe from the across the room. 


	6. Tarnished Armor

(Chapter orignally posted 1/16/04, major revision 1/17/04, minor revision 1/26/04)  
  
Author's Note: Well, here it is, the moment of truth. I'm not completely satisfied with this chapter. I know how I wanted events to unfold, but I just couldn't seem to get it into writing. I have revised again and again, and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. I do hope that it all makes sense, and does not seem too terribly farfetched. And Severus may seem to be a little "soft" at this point in the story, but don't worry... he's just in shock. He'll eventually return to his surly, sexy self. :)  
  
Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
Chapter 5 ~ Tarnished Armor  
  
Hermione watched silently as the man, whom she had disliked for nearly half her life, so delicately handled her son. HIS son, she reminded herself.  
  
"How could I have been so stupid?" she wondered as she watched him rocking the child. She did not realize that she had spoken the words aloud.  
  
Severus ceased his rocking when he heard her speak. He was surprised that she was still awake, and was not expecting to be caught at such a vulnerable moment.  
  
"What do you mean by that, Miss Granger?" he asked softly, with a quirk of his eyebrow.   
  
"Stupid for not telling you the truth. Stupid for hiding these many months. Stupid for what I did... that night..." she trailed off with a sigh.   
  
"It happened the night of the Final Battle," she began.  
  
She couldn't continue, she didn't know how to tell him what she... what they both... had done...   
  
She paused for a moment, remembering vividly the details of that night.  
  
*+*+*+*+*+* Flashback *+*+*+*+*+*  
  
The battle was nearly over. Hermione lay helplessly on the sidelines, recovering from a Death Eater's hex that she hadn't quite managed to dodge. Luckily, somebody had thrown up a shield in front of her at the last minute, and she hadn't been hit with the full force of the curse.  
  
She lay there and watched the ongoing battle as her potions professor tossed aside his Death Eater garb, revealing his true loyalties as he joined the Order for what they all hoped would be the end of Lord Voldemort's reign of terror. There he stood with the rest of them, at Harry's side, helping to ward off the Dark Lord's minions as Harry prepared to duel with Voldemort himself.  
  
She watched the man ~ the "evil" head of Slytherin, the surly Potion's Master whom all Gryffindors dispised, the man that they had always called a "greasy git" ~ as he stood there, fierce in battle, valiantly fighting to protect the Boy Who Lived, and she was struck with the thought that she had never witnessed such a magnificent sight.  
  
And she realized now, that her professor had been the one to save her earlier ~ throwing up that shield in front of her, and taking out the Death Eater who had attacked her.   
  
Hermione had always been a girl with both feet planted firmly on the ground. She was not prone to flights of fancy, nor was she a giggling school girl, daydreaming of her Prince Charming... but now, as Severus broke away from the battle to return to her aid, sweeping her up into his arms and apparating them both to safety, that is exactly how she felt ~ like her Knight in Shining Armor had come to her rescue.  
  
He apparated her to safety, and as they arrived at a quiet grove in the middle of the Forbidden Forest, he suddenly dropped to his knees, almost dropping Hermione as he let out a cry of surprise. She fell with him, nearly landing on top of him, still clinging on to him as he grabbed his left forearm in shock.  
  
"Professor Snape? Are you alright?"   
  
He did not respond immediately. He gazed at his arm in wonder, as he rolled up his sleeve and gently touched the area where, years ago, he had been branded as a servant of the Dark Lord. "It's gone!" He whispered hoarsely. "It's gone!"  
  
"Does this mean..." Hermione began, not finishing her question lest the answer might not be true.  
  
"The Mark is gone. HE is gone. Voldemort is dead." Severus closed his eyes as he whispered, and did something that he hadn't done in nearly 20 years. He cried. It was the first tear he had shed since that long ago meeting with Albus Dumbledore. It seemed a lifetime ago, that day that he turned away from the Dark Lord. It was the turning point in his life, and it had been the last time he had ever cried. Until now, as one single tear escaped from under his closed eyelids, rolling down his face before coming to rest on his cheek, near the corner of his mouth.  
  
He opened his eyes and met Hermione's astonished gaze, as she asked him, "Is it really over? Or is this just a dream?"  
  
"It's real. He's gone," his voice choked with emotion as he repeated it over and over, "It's over. He's gone."  
  
Hermione suddenly realized that she was clutching him tighter, as if to reassure herself that this was not a dream, and as she looked into his eyes she had the sudden urge to kiss her savior. She reached up and brushed away that single tear, tracing the wet trail that it had marked on his face, before leaning forward to brush his cheek with her lips.  
  
He turned abruptly and her kiss landed gently on his lips. Suddenly, what she had intended to be a chaste kiss of gratitude turned into a desperate, heated, passionate kiss. A kiss unlike either of them had experienced before. A kiss brought on by an onslaught of pent up emotions. A kiss from which neither of them could break free. She didn't resist as his hands found their way to the hem of her skirt, and she in turn began to tug at the bottom of his shirt. In only a matter of minutes, she was underneath him on the soft ground, her skirt raised above her hips and his trousers undone as he pressed against her. Riding on a tidal wave of emotions resulting from the events of that evening, they each took what the other was willing to give.  
  
Hermione didn't quite understand what had compelled her to give in to him with such wild abandon, but she had given herself to him willingly. When it was over, she had no regrets.  
  
Which is why it hurt so much when he pulled away with a look of shame.  
  
"It's OK, professor..." she said in a whisper, trying to hide the hurt and confusion in her voice.  
  
"It is most definitely NOT OK." He was suddenly back to being the greasy git she had grown up knowing. "I shouldn't have let you kiss me."  
  
"What? Did you think I was trying to seduce you?" she asked, dumbfounded. "Do you think I intended for this to happen?"  
  
"Miss Granger... I don't care if you intended for this to happen," he sneered, "but I intend to forget that it ever did!"  
  
She had been fighting to keep her emotions in check, but when he shouted these words at her and began to walk away through the forest, Hermione lost control. She pulled her wand from her sleeve, muttering to herself, "So, you want to forget... "  
  
"This. Never. Happened." she muttered angrily as she pointed her wand into the forest, aiming for the spot between the trees where she had seen him disappear, "Obliviate!"   
  
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*END*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*  
  
She shook her head as she was jolted back the present. How could she make him understand what had caused her to do what she had done? Words did not seem adequate to tell the story. She almost wished that she had a pensieve, so that he see her memories and relive that night in full detail. Suddenly remembering that Severus was a skilled Legilimens, a thought occurred to her.  
  
"Look into my eyes, Professor..."  
  
Severus, understanding what she wanted, began to protest, "Don't you think that a bit drastic?"  
  
"I know of no other way to make you understand. It is because of me that you no longer have your own memories of that night," Severus' eyes grew wide at this statement as Hermione continued, "so the least I can do is let you share mine. It is time, Professor, for you to know the rest of the story."  
  
The look in her eyes convinced him that this would be the only way that he would learn the entire truth. It was now or never.  
  
*+*+* Flash ~ Sweeping Hermione into his arms and apparating her to safety ~ Flash ~ Severus dropping to his knees ~ Flash ~ Crushing his mouth to hers desperately ~ Flash ~ Hermione laying beneath him on the ground as his hands forced her skirt up ~ Flash ~ Hermione's tears as he looked back at her in shame ~ Flash ~ Hermione raising her wand as he stalked away through the trees *+*+*  
  
Having put together enough flashes of her memories to understand why he had no memory of conceiving this child, Severus broke eye contact with Hermione. The silence was deafening as he sat there, gaping at her, unable to speak. Finally, thoroughly drained and fighting back tears, Hermione began to speak again.  
  
"When I thought about it later, Professor, I knew how stupid I had been. I needn't have taken away your memories. In time, we both may have come to terms with that night's events. And then, when I realized that I was pregnant, how could I tell you? I was afraid that you would turn me away, not believe such ridiculous story. Or if you did believe, that you would again want to forget, or demand that I terminate the pregnancy."  
  
"Now, seeing you there, holding my son... YOUR son... I realized again how stupid I have been."  
  
Severus arose from the chair, handed the child back to Hermione, and without a single word, walked away.  
  
He walked out of the room and, Hermione was sure as she watched him leave, out of her life, for good this time.  
  
*****  
  
Severus didn't know what to say to the girl. After seeing those flashes of her memories, he felt a shame like none that he had ever felt before.  
  
He wandered into the kitchen, feeling the need for a strong drink. He did not idulge in liquor often, but oh how he wished he had a bottle of firewhiskey right now. Disappointed, but not surprised, he did not find any in store. Instead, he turned to the stove and started heating water for tea. He slumped heavily into a chair at the table, bowing his head into his hands as he went over and over the events that he had just witnessed in his mind.  
  
Over and over again he saw himself crushing his lips to hers... holding her against the ground as he pushed into her... looking at her in shame before he walked away...  
  
Having only seen flashes of her memory was like putting together a jigsaw puzzle with pieces missing. Putting together the pieces that he had, Severus did not get the full picture, and in his mind he was convinced that he had raped the girl.  
  
"How could I have forced her to... and then, I just walked away..." he muttered as he slammed his fist down on the table, drawing blood on his knuckles.  
  
**Go back into the room and talk to her**  
  
"How can I face her again? After all that I've already done to her?"  
  
**How do you think she will feel if you walk away from her again?**  
  
"Surely, she won't want me to be anywhere near her again... or her son, for that matter."  
  
**Stop being so bloody stupid. Go talk to the girl!**  
  
By the time the water was boiling, he had composed himself enough to return to Hermione's room and finish their conversation. He poured himself a cup of tea and made his way back to the bedroom.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione wasn't sure how long she lay there crying after he walked out, and it was with a mixed sense of shock and relief that she watched him walk back into the room a short while later, carrying a steaming cup of tea.  
  
"I'm sorry, Miss Granger... I just needed to think..." Severus tried to explain as he set the tea on her bedside table and pulled up the chair next to the bed, bowing his head into his hands as he sat, inhaling sharply as he wondered where to go from here.   
  
"Miss Granger," he began, "I know it's too little too late, but I'm sorry for what I did that night. I do not expect you to forgive me so easily for hurting you. I wish I could explain my behavior... I don't know what I was thinking! Reliving it through YOUR memories does not allow me to remember what *I* was feeling at that moment in time. Maybe, in time, I will remember... and then, I can offer you a proper apology."  
  
He got up and began to pace the room as he continued, his voice this time a bit sharper as he ranted, "I have always felt as though I was forgetting something important that evening. Like I had lost time somewhere. But I never imagined that I... that WE... "  
  
"Professor Snape," Hermione interrupted, completely unaware that he had drawn the wrong conclusion from her memories, "there is no need to explain. It took me a long time to get past it, and reliving it tonight has brought back so much of the pain I had felt for so long. But this time, I think I understand..."  
  
Hermione hesitated a moment before continuing, "I want my son to know his father, Professor," she looked up at him, "that is, if you would like to be a part of his life."  
  
Severus was stunned. He didn't know what he was expecting her to say, but he certainly wasn't expecting to hear THAT. His jaw dropped, and he found his mouth unable to form the words that he wanted to speak. He furrowed his brow as he contemplated what she had just said.  
  
Hermione, taking this as denial, hastily added, "Of course, I do understand if you don't..."  
  
"Miss Granger!" Severus interrupted sharply. He took a deep breath before he continued, trying to take control over his emotions as he began to confess to some of his innermost feelings. When he finally continued, he paced back and forth in front of her, speaking as if he were lecturing one of his classes, "I never planned on having a family. It would have only complicated things. I could not, in good conscience, endanger an innocent life by becoming emotionally involved with anybody. Especially, the life of a child."  
  
"And even now, with Voldemort gone, I have never considered building a life of my own... starting a family. I didn't feel that I deserve, need, or want it at this stage in the game."  
  
"However," he paused as his voice lost just a bit of its edge, "unplanned and unexpected though this turn of events has been, I can not deny that I would like to know my child. I am honored that you would allow me to have a place in your son's life, even though I do not deserve that much."  
  
"OUR son's life, Professor Snape," Hermione breathed with a sigh of relief, "and I want you to understand that I'm not asking for anything more than you are willing to give. Just allowing your son to grow up knowing his father is enough," she took another deep breath before she continued, "and, if you intend to be a part of our son's life, then I think it would be wise if you would call me Hermione."  
  
Severus paused for a moment, "Very well, Hermione. And, if you would like, you may call me Severus."  
  
"Thank you, Severus," she hesitated as she wondered what to say next. With a nervous grin, she asked, "And what should we call our son?"  
  
Severus was speechless. He felt as though, considering what he had done to Hermione, he did not deserve the priviledge of naming their son. Besides, he hadn't even known that he had fathered a child before this evening. Hermione had probably been thinking of names for months now, and he would not interfere if she had already decided.  
  
"I will leave that decision to you, Hermione. Believing that I would never have a child to name, I have never given it any thought. Did you have any ideas?"  
  
Hermione brushed away a tear as she quietly spoke, "Samuel, after my father," Severus nodded in approval, "and for his middle name, if you do not object, I choose Remus."  
  
Severus arched his eyebrow at her, "Name my son after a werewolf?" he asked with a sneer on his face. He looked at Hermione and nodded, trying to wipe the expression off of his face as he continued, "Considering what he has done for you and my son, I have no objection."  
  
"Samuel Remus Granger", Hermione smiled as she looked at her son.  
  
Severus wasn't expecting the slight stab of disappointment he felt when he realized that his son would not carry the name Snape. "Samuel Remus Granger," he repeated. And then he smiled to himself.   
  
Granger or Snape... it did not matter what the child was called, so long as their son grew up knowing his father. 


	7. Revelations

Author's Note: Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 6 ~ Revelation  
  
No longer bearing the burden of her secret, Hermione finally fell into a deep sleep. Only waking when the baby needed fed, she slept until late morning. She woke to the sound of footsteps approaching the bedroom. Severus, too, had fallen asleep in his chair, and was roused by the approaching footsteps. They both looked up in time to see an exhausted and disheveled Remus entering the room.  
  
Remus glanced back and forth between the two of them, "I wanted to check in on Hermione and the baby before heading back to the school for a few hours. Is everything well?" he asked as he smiled lovingly at the sleeping infant.  
  
"Never better," Hermione replied with a smile.  
  
"Lupin, would you please ask Madame Pomfrey to stop by this afternoon? Hermione and the baby should both be examined as soon as possible. That is, if Hermione is agreeable to letting Madame Pomfrey in on the news," he looked at Hermione and continued, "I assure you that you can trust her to be discreet."  
  
"I think that would be for the best, Severus," Hermione replied nervously, "As much as I would like to keep this private for a while longer, I'm not going to endanger our son's health by refusing the nearest help available."  
  
Remus unsuccessfully tried to hide his surprise at Hermione's words. She had said "our son".  
  
Noticing the look on Remus' face, Hermione took his hand and replied, "Remus... Severus is Samuel's father. I am sorry that I didn't tell you sooner, but I didn't know how..."  
  
"We can talk later," Remus replied as he squeezed her hand, and smiled, "So, his name is Samuel? After your father?"  
  
Surprisingly, it was Severus who replied, "Samuel Remus Granger."  
  
"Hermione! I don't know what to say..." Remus stammered.  
  
"You have been a second father to me these past few months, Remus. When I was wallowing in despair, you comforted me. You were a friend when I had no one to turn to. And because of your concern for me, you probably saved my life, and Samuel's too, yesterday. I don't know how to thank you for all that you have done," she added tearfully as she continued, "I wanted to show you how much you mean to me, and couldn't think of a better way than to give my son your name, along with that of my own father."  
  
"I am honored... " Remus replied in a choked voice as he leaned over and embraced the young woman. Hermione finally remembered something, "Remus! My mother! Could you... would it be too much to ask of you to make sure that she knows about Samuel?" she fretted.  
  
"Not at all," Remus smiled as he assured her, "I'll see to it personally."  
  
A few minutes later, after fussing over the sleeping infant one last time, Remus regretfully excused himself, promising again to send word to Hermione's mother and assuring them that he would return with Madame Pomfrey that afternoon.   
  
"Lupin, can I have a word?" Severus called just after Remus had walked out through the door. He caught up to him in the living room and extended his hand, "Thank you... Remus."  
  
Remus reached out and accepted the gesture, "Anytime, Snape!" Remus smiled, as he turned and walked out the door.  
  
*****  
  
True to Remus' word, he returned with Madame Pomfrey a few hours later.  
  
"Hermione Granger! What do we have here?" she exclaimed as she entered the room and approached the bed.  
  
"Madame Pomfrey," Hermione smiled, "Thank you so much for coming."  
  
"Child, you should have come to me!" Madame Pomfrey scolded her gently, "But I'm sure you don't need a lecture from me. Now, tell me, what happened last evening?"  
  
"I don't know exactly. It came on so sudden. I was in so much pain, and I began to bleed. I'm afraid I lost consciousness, and the next thing I knew, Remus and Severus were here. They helped me to deliver the baby."  
  
Madame Pomfrey looked at the two professors curiously, as she began to examine Hermione.  
  
Severus continued, filling in the blanks, "She was unconscious and had lost a lot of blood by the time we got here, and her water broke just as we arrived. The labor progressed quickly and there was no time to send for help," he explained, "there were no problems with the delivery, and afterwards, I applied a healing salve and administered a blood replenishing potion along with a mild pain reliever. Hermione seems to have regained much of her strength today."  
  
Madame Pomfrey nodded in approval as she moved on to examine the baby.  
  
"The baby came nearly six weeks early. Please, Madame Pomfrey... is my son going to be OK?" Hermione asked worriedly.  
  
"He is quite healthy, Hermione, considering how early he arrived. Are you nursing the child?" she asked, and Hermione nodded, "Very well, then. That is the best thing that you can do for him now. It will strenthen his immune system, which I suspect is a bit underdeveloped at this stage. Feed him often, as he will not likely be ready for long nursing sessions yet, but will need as much nourishment as he can get. As he grows stronger, he will feed for longer periods of time, and less frequently."  
  
"I would like to keep a close eye on him over the next few weeks, to make sure that he does not develop any problems that many preemies are prone to, and see that he starts gaining weight quickly. But aside from his size, I do not forsee any problems."  
  
"And you, dear, are in excellent condition considering what Professor Lupin had told me earlier about your ordeal last evening. You are very fortunate, Hermione, to have such capable friends," she smiled as she looked at Remus and Severus.  
  
Severus shot a questioning glance at Hermione, and she nodded in approval before he addressed Madame Pomfrey, "Poppy, there is something you should know."  
  
"What is it, Severus?"  
  
"I am... Samuel's father," he replied hesitantly.  
  
Madame Pomfrey tried to cover her shock, but couldn't hide the smile that was creeping up on her face. She stepped forward and embraced Severus, whispering, "I never would have guessed... but I couldn't be happier for you!"  
  
Severus's face flushed as she placed a motherly kiss on his cheek, and she laughed as she teased, "For once, I know something that Albus doesn't know!" She winked at them as she prepared to leave.   
  
Severus frowned at her for a moment, before winking back at her and whispering, "Not much gets past Albus. Enjoy it while you can."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was up and about later that day, and stepped into the role of a new mother with an ease that would not have been possible without the company of Remus and Severus. Shortly after Madame Pomfrey's visit, Severus had excused himself to return to Hogwarts, where he planned on paying a visit to the Headmaster.   
  
It was true, what he had said to Madame Pomfrey... not much gets past Albus.  
  
When he approached the Headmasters office, it seemed as though the old man had been expecting him.  
  
"Severus! I wondered where you might have disappeared to with Professor Lupin last evening that you did not return."  
  
"Albus, I have some.... surprising news."  
  
"Indeed?" Albus questioned with a twinkle in his eye. Severus began to suspect that nothing had gotten past Albus, after all. He wondered if Albus had known about Hermione's pregnancy all along.  
  
"Professor Lupin asked me to assist him with a friend who was... dealing with a difficult situation last night. This friend happened to be Hermione Granger," he paused, gauging Albus' reaction.   
  
The older man sat back in his chair, templing his fingers under his chin before replying, "I see..."  
  
"Miss Granger has spent these many months concealing a pregnancy, and last evening she went in to premature labor. Lupin and I assisted in the birth."  
  
"And how are Miss Granger and the baby doing?"  
  
"They are doing fine. She is now a the mother of a healthy baby boy... Samuel Remus Granger."  
  
"What wonderful news!" Albus beamed at Severus, "Is there anything else you need to tell me, Severus."  
  
"Albus. Somehow, I get the feeling that you know the answer to that question. Even though I did not know until late last evening myself." Severus shook his head ruefully, before continuing, "But yes, there is something else... " he inhaled sharply, and his voice dropped to a near whisper, "It appears that I am Samuel's father."  
  
"And you were not aware of this?" Severus couldn't tell if Albus was asking a question or a stating a fact. He groaned, and began telling Albus the story of the night that the child was conceived. He bowed his head in shame as he finished reliving the flashes of Hermione's memory that he had witnessed the night before.  
  
Albus paused in deep thought for a few moments, before replying, "Severus, all may not be as it seems. While I do believe that what you saw was true, I think there may be some facts that you are not aware of. Do not be so hard on yourself until you have the whole story."  
  
"What more could there be to know? I know what I saw, and I don't see any way that I could have misinterpreted what I did to that poor girl!"  
  
As Severus excused himself from the Headmaster's office, Albus sat back and smiled knowingly, quietly saying to himself, "In time, Severus, I believe you will realize just how mistaken you may be." 


	8. So Complicated

Author's Note: This is probably the hardest chapter I have had to write so far, as I had bits and pieces that I needed to tie together, and needed to revise it many times to make a decent transition covering the weeks between the birth and Christmas. I may need to revise it yet again, as I still feel that therre is something missing.  
  
Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 7 ~ Complicated  
  
That afternoon, while Severus was back at Hogwarts visitng the Headmaster, Hermione finally told Remus all about the events that unfolded during his absence the previous evening. She told him of that night in the Forbidden Forest, and Severus' reactions to what he witnessed in her memories.  
  
"He says that he forgives me, Remus. But something doesn't seem quite right. I almost feel as though he is only forgiving me for Samuel's sake."  
  
"Hermione, this must be quite a shock to him. Not remembering..." Remus paused while he considered how to continue, "being with you. Then to suddenly find out that he is a father... I'm sure it's just going to take some time for everything to sink in. If he says that he forgives you, then you need to believe him. Severus Snape doesn't waste energy on feelings that aren't true. I know all too well what a "slimy bastard" Severus appears to be, but under the surface, he is a decent man."  
  
"I know that he is, Remus. If I didn't realize it these last few years, knowing the great personal risks he had taken as a spy for the Order, I certainly did realize it the night of the final battle. Watching standing with the the rest of you, so fiercely protective of Harry, as though there had never been any animosity between them. It was... he was..." Hermione sighed, "beautiful."  
  
"And then when he apparated me to safety, I think I got caught up in the fairy tale image that I had of him that night. That's why I didn't resist... why I let him." She stopped and took a deep breath, "Oh, who am I kidding? I didn't "let him", I wanted him! I may not have intended for things to turn out that way, but once he kissed me, I threw reason and logic out the window, and damned the consequences!"  
  
Remus held tight to her hand, keeping silent as she continued, "And, it took some time, but thanks to you I've come to term with those consequences. I do hope that he can find it in himself to do the same. If he is to know his son, Remus, then he needs to forgive me... TRULY forgive me!"  
  
They did not hear the sound of Severus' footsteps as he entered the cottage and approached Hermione's bedroom. They were both startled when they heard a deep silky voice coming from the bedroom door, "It is not I who needs to forgive you."  
  
*****  
  
"I threw reason and logic out the window, and damned the consequences!"  
  
Severus paused just outside the bedroom door. He assumed that she could only be referring to her obliviating him that night.  
  
He moved just a bit closer to catch the tail end of the conversation, and could hardly believe what he had heard her say next, "...If he is to know his son, Remus, then he needs to forgive me... TRULY forgive me."  
  
Forgive her? After what HE had done to HER, why was she the one asking for forgiveness?  
  
He stepped in to the room, "It is not I who needs to forgive you."  
  
Slowly, he approached the rocking chair where Hermione was sitting, holding their son, "I am the one to blame for what happened that evening. I regret hurting you, Hermione. After our conversation last evening, you surely must realize that?"  
  
Hermione started to protest, but Severus held up a hand to silence her as he continued, "But if it is my forgiveness that you seek, please know that I do not hold anything against you, Hermione. I do not blame you for obliviating me," he paused and quirked an eyebrow, "After what I did to you, I suppose I am lucky that you only removed my memories, and not... anything else."  
  
He was surprised when she laughed at this. He was not joking, he would not have blamed if she had aimed another, more painful curse... elsewhere. He felt lucky to have survived her fury at all!  
  
Remus looked back and forth between the two of them, suddenly realizing what Hermione had noticed the night before. Something was not quite right with the situation. And now, he was beginning to suspect what was wrong. It was nothing more than gross miscommunication... Severus had misinterpreted Hermione's memories. Hermione thought that he was angry at her for obliviating him, while in reality, Severus was angry at himself, believing that he had raped her.  
  
It was so simple, yet so complicated, as neither of them were aware of what the other was thinking.  
  
Remus resolved to make sure that they worked this out. And he knew just the person to help him achieve this goal. He excused himself, and headed back to Hogwarts, heading straight for the Headmaster's office when he arrived.  
  
*****  
  
Remus sat across the desk from the Headmaster, having just told him what he suspected was wrong between Hermione and Severus.  
  
"I had similar suspiscions myself, Remus. I have known Severus for a long time, and I know that he would never force himself on anybody, especially a student, no matter what the circumstances. Yet, with only the bits and pieces of her memory that he witnessed last evening, he has likely not even considered the possibility that Hermione gave herself to him willingly."  
  
"Headmaster, did you know... about any of this?" Remus asked.  
  
Albus sat back and smiled knowingly, "Remus, I had suspiscions, but never knew the full circumstances of Hermione's situation."  
  
"Miss Granger has the potential to do great things, and some of us had hoped that she would be willing to return to the school and work as an apprentice to one of the other professors. We called her in to my office, and asked her to please consider."  
  
"When she took off in tears, those of us who were present assumed that it was because of what had happened to her parents. We had hoped that she would reconsider eventually. But then, she left the school without a word to anybody, not even Mssrs. Potter and Weasley. Hermione is not one to run away from a challenge, and I began to suspect that she was upset over much more than her parents unfortunate accident."  
  
Remus nodded, as he had heard of her flight from the school, but never knew exactly what had traspired the night that she disappeared.  
  
"Remus, I have eyes and ears everywhere. One afternoon, many months later, I had heard reports that Miss Granger had been spotted sharing a cup of tea with you at the Leaky Cauldron."  
  
Remus looked guiltily at his hands, "I should have told you that I was in contact with her, Albus."  
  
"You acted in her best interests, Remus. Out of respect for her privacy, you did what you thought was right. I would have done the same."  
  
"Anyway, as I was saying, I heard that Miss Granger had met with you that day. Over the next few months, I had more reports of your comings and goings as the two of you passed through the Leaky Cauldron into London. The last I heard, Hermione was noticably with child."  
  
"Surely, Albus, you didn't suspect...?"  
  
Albus chuckled, "No, Remus. I didn't suspect that you fathered her child. I hadn't a clue to the child's parentage, and it wasn't for me to speculate. I know you, Remus, and when I heard that you were accompanying her back and forth to London, the only thing I suspected was that you were being a true friend."  
  
"It wasn't until Severus came to me, earlier today, to inform me of the events of last evening that I began to suspect that he was the child's father. He told me that Miss Granger had given birth, but something in his face told me there was much more to the story."  
  
"I know Severus very well, Remus. He often jumps to conclusions without having all of the pieces of the story. Unfortunately, I believe that is what has happened here. Telling him so won't do any good... we need to find a way to restore his memories, so that he can forgive himself, and move on with his new life."  
  
*****  
  
During the next few weeks, Severus continued to pay daily visits to his son. Things were still tense between he and Hermione. They each felt as though there was much left unsaid, yet neither could bring themselves to broach the subject. Instead, they would sit in silence, as Severus spent time bonding with Samuel.  
  
Yet, for all that was left unsaid between Severus and Hermione, his handling of his child spoke volumes  
  
For a man who had never been in close contact with a baby, and never planned or wanted a child of his own, Severus had stepped into the role as if he had been doing it his entire life. Hermione privately marveled over the way the man could silence the child with a few soft murmurs, or the way he would rock with him for hours, even after the child would fall asleep in his arms, or how reluctant he was to put him down when it was time to go back to the school. The only time that he did not seem to mind giving up the child was when it was time for feeding. Severus would sit back and watch pensively as Hermione nourished their son.  
  
Madame Pomfrey also paid regular visits to the cottage to check on Samuel. The baby was steadily gaining weight, and by Christmas, the nurse had announced that, despite his size, he was as strong and healthy as he would have been if he had been born full term. It should be safe to have more visitors or take him on outings, if Hermione wished to do so. Hermione knew that this was Madam Pomfrey's way of hinting around for them to come visit the school for Christmas.  
  
With Remus, Madame Pomfrey, and Albus now knowing about the child, Hermione and Severus decided that it was time for Severus to tell the rest of his colleagues. It was one of the few conversations that they had during Severus' latest visit.  
  
"They need to know, Severus. And I don't want them to hear it through the gossip that will surely reach them in due time."  
  
And so, one evening Albus called a meeting in the Staff Room. Severus and Remus sat with him as he began to tell the story.  
  
"I think you will all be relieved to know that we have located Hermione Granger."  
  
There were murmers of excitement before Minerva McGonagall spoke up, excitedly asking, "Where has she been? Is she alright?"  
  
"Indeed she is, Minerva," Albus replied.  
  
Remus interrupted, "I suppose that I should tell you that I have been in contact with Hermione since early this fall."  
  
Minerva huffed, "And you did not see fit to inform us? You knew how concerned we were!"  
  
It was Albus who spoke in Remus' defense, "He did not tell us out of respect for Hermione's privacy. You see, she didn't want anyone to know the reason that she was hiding."  
  
Minerva and the rest of the staff became silent, eager to hear whatever it was that the Headmaster was about to tell them.  
  
"When Miss Granger left us last year, she did not want anybody to know that she was with child."  
  
There was a collective gasp among the staff, as Minerva spoke up once again, "Why did she run? Didn't she know that we would help her?"  
  
Remus replied, "She left, Minerva, because she was afraid. Afraid of the gossip, afraid that we would think less of her, and afraid of the reaction if the child's father were to find out the truth."  
  
Nobody took notice of Severus reaction, until he spoke up, "I am the child's father."  
  
"You... you...?" Minerva stammered, "What did you do to the poor girl to make her afraid to tell you?"  
  
Albus interrupted, "Minerva, it is not what you think. There are events that unfolded the night of the Final Battle that, due to an unfortunate incident afterwards, Severus has no memory of. He was not aware of Miss Granger's condition, nor that there was even a possibility that he had fathered a child."  
  
"What...?" Minerva began.  
  
"It is not my story to tell, Minerva. It is between Severus and Hermione. And out of respect for Hermione, I ask that you leave it at that."  
  
"Are you in contact with Hermione now, Severus?" she asked.  
  
"I am. And we are... working things out. She has agreed to let me be a part of her... OUR son's life."  
  
Minerva looked torn between anger over the shock of what she had learned this evening, and affection for the man that she had grown to respect over the past decade. She and Severus, on the surface, did not seem very fond of each other. But in reality, she had grown quite fond of the man that he had become, and he had grown equally fond of the woman who treated him as a friend.  
  
After a few moments of silence, Minerva approached Severus and embraced him, "I wish you the best of luck, Severus. And I am looking forward to meeting your son."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione knew that it was time to tell her old friends, also... but this was something that she could not tell Ron and Harry by owl, and they were still away for Auror training. She sent them each a message by Owl, wishing them Happy Holidays and letting them know that she had important news to tell them whenever they returned home in a few months. She only hoped that she would have the chance to tell them herself before the news began to spread through mutual contacts in the wizarding world.  
  
One evening, a few days before Christmas, Severus was getting ready to excuse himself after his daily visit with his son, when there was a knock on the door. He was surprised when he heard Hermione's squeal of delight and he looked to the front door to see Remus standing there smiling, and holding a tall, thin Christmas tree.   
  
"Happy Christmas, Hermione!" Remus cried jovially, "and you too, Severus."  
  
"Oh, Remus! It's wonderful! Severus, will you stay and help decorate it with us?"  
  
Just then, Samuel woke up. "Allow me, Hermione," Severus said as he turned down the hallway to get the baby. Severus had never been so relieved to hear his son cry as he had been at that moment, as it gave him an excuse to distance himself from the festivities. Carrying Samuel, he returned to the living room and sat by the fire, stealing glances out of the corner of his eye as he observed Remus and Hermione smiling and laughing with each other, as they sang carols and decorated the tree.  
  
He felt a pang of envy at their easy friendship, as it was like nothing that he had ever experienced. Thus, he contented himself with holding his son, unobtrusively watching their antics from across the room as tinsel was strewn on the tree. When Samuel eventually nodded off to sleep and returned to his cradle, it was with a bit of reluctance that Severus joined them, as he was the only one who was tall enough to place the glittering star on top of the tree. Hermione's smile of delight encouraged him to conjure some fairy lights as well, and before long, he was smiling along with them as they all worked together to string garland over the mantle and in the doorways. It was the first Christmas that Severus knew that he would have a pleasant memory of.  
  
It had never been harder for him to leave than it was that evening. He reluctantly bid Hermione and Remus a good evening, and returned to the castle.  
  
After the door closed behind him, Remus put his arm around Hermione and said quietly, "It's about time he loosen up a bit. I think he's beginning to come around."  
  
Hermione sighed, "I do hope so."  
  
"Hermione, will you please consider coming to the Christmas Feast at Hogwarts? Severus and I are required to be there, and I do not want you to spend your first Christmas with your son alone. I know that Professor Dumbledore would be pleased to have you, and the rest of the staff are wondering when they will meet your son."  
  
"I don't know if I'm ready, Remus."  
  
"The longer you isolate yourself, the harder it will be. You can't hide forever, Hermione. Please, just tell me that you will consider."  
  
Hermione was nervous about facing so many of her old professors, but was looking forward to coming out of isolation. Even with Remus and Severus there so often, she was beginning to feel lonely.  
  
"Remus, if it pleases you, I will come," Hermione whispered.  
  
Remus put his arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her temple, "It would please me, Hermione."  
  
**And,** Remus thought to himself, trying to conceal a conspiratory smile, **I'm sure it would please Severus.** 


	9. The Christmas Feast

Author's Note: Oh my! And I thought the last chapter was the hardest that I had to write! It was nothing compared to this one! I have had the Christmas Feast scenes written for days... but the last segment of this chapter gave me a lot of trouble. I must have revised it at least a dozen times before posting it. It's after chapters like this, when I've tried and tried to perfect it, that I most appreciate your input, so please let me know what you think.  
  
Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 8 ~ The Christmas Feast  
  
Christmas morning, after bundling Samuel into a fleece bunting and wrapping him tightly in warm blankets, she waited for Severus and Remus to arrive, as they were to accompany her on her journey to the school.   
  
Hermione had fussed over her appearance for quite some time that morning. The past few weeks had been spent in lounging clothes or a dressing gown and slippers, with her hair always pulled into a ponytail. As she brushed her soft curls, it dawned on her that her hair had never been so luxurious before her pregnancy. She had been too preoccupied to pay much notice to the changes in her body through the last few months of her pregnancy, and she laughed when she compared her now-soft waves to the bushy mane that she used to battle with during her school days. She only hoped that it would not return to its former bushiness after the pregnancy hormones wore off. She also took notice that her once-pale complexion was now replaced with a healthy glow of rosy cheeks, and that her body now formed the soft curves of a woman, rather than the former skinniness of a young girl. Dressing carefully in robes of deep crimson, dabbing on just a hint of lipstick and pinning the sides of her hair back with pearl combs, she stepped back to look in her full length mirror and gasped at what she saw. Who was this beautiful young woman? It certainly wasn't the Hermione Granger that she remembered from less than a year ago.  
  
When she finally heard a knock at the door, she opened it to find Severus standing there alone.  
  
"Where is Remus? I thought he was coming as well."  
  
Severus paused briefly, subtly taking in her change in appearance, before answering, "He had to... run a last minute errand before the feast."  
  
Hermione started, "What..."  
  
"He's been very secretive about it. But it must be important if he skipped out on accompanying you on your first excursion out of the house. He's a bit protective of you, in case you haven't noticed."  
  
Hermione laughed, "Very well then, let's go! Lest I change my mind. I'm feeling a bit jittery about facing everybody today."  
  
"Not to worry, Hermione. Your former professors are very fond of you, and I'm sure they will be equally excited to see both their favorite student and her son."  
  
Hermione tried to stall for a bit more time, double checking the bag that she had packed for the baby. Hoping that she hadn't forgotten anything important, she pulled on a pair of knee high, low heeled boots and a forest green winter cloak, throwing a tartan cape and around her neck, fastening it with a pin at the shoulder and pulling the hood up over her head. She turned around to find Severus waiting patiently, surprised to see that he was already holding Samuel.  
  
"Allow me to carry him, Hermione. Once we apparate to the gates, it's a long walk to the school and we have quite a bit of snow out there. Trudging through it with a baby, when you haven't been out of house, getting little exercise for weeks, will not be easy for you."  
  
She nodded, as she pulled the baby bag over her shoulder, and walked out the front door where she almost lost her footing in the slippery snow. Severus quickly used his free arm to grab her by the elbow and keep her upright. Slightly embarrassed, Hermione looked up at Severus, her face flushed.   
  
"Thank you, Severus," she sighed, as he offered her the crook of his arm to hold on to and they apparated to the gates of the school grounds. Arm in arm, they walked the path up to the school. Hermione had never forgotten how beautiful the school grounds were in wintertime. It was as if time stood still in this magical place, and as they approached the entrance of the castle, she had the feeling that she was finally coming home.  
  
*****  
  
Minerva McGonagall met them just inside the front door. "Hermione!" she smiled through her tears as she approached the young woman, and gathered her into a warm embrace. "It is delightful to see you again," she paused and looked up at Severus, before glancing down at the bundle of blankets in his arms. Hard as she tried, she couldn't keep up her usual stern appearance as she teased, "And what are you trying to smuggle in to the school today, Severus?"  
  
Severus flashed a rare smile at her in return, and without a word, he gently raised the corner of the blanket that had been shielding the cold wind from the child's face. Minerva gasped when she saw two black sapphire eyes shining up at her. She looked up at Severus with watery eyes, and spoke in a hushed voice, "I never thought I'd see the day..."  
  
She paused and composed herself, looking back and forth between Severus and Hermione, before saying, "Congratulations, he is beautiful!"  
  
Minerva helped Hermione off with her outer cloak and her bag, and Severus handed the baby over to her as he removed his own cloak. Minerva led Hermione to a chamber off of the Great Hall, where she could wait while Severus took care of their belongings. "I have to get to the Great Hall, Hermione. As usual, we only have a handful of students in the school for the holiday, but I really should be there when they arrive for the feast."  
  
"Thank you, Professor McGonagall. I will see you shortly," Hermione replied nervously.   
  
Minerva stopped long enough to squeeze Hermione's shoulder, "Don't worry, child! There is nothing to be nervous about. You will always be welcome at Hogwarts."  
  
*****  
  
Severus returned a short time later, assisted Hermione to her feet, and walked beside her as he led her towards the Great Hall. She hesitated in the doorway, pausing to take in her surroundings. The beauty of the magnificent hall, with it's enchanted ceilings, especially during the holidays when adorned with glorious Christmas decorations, never failed to take her breath away. Time, indeed, stood still inside this castle as well as on the outside.  
  
The twinkling eyes of Albus Dumbledore greeted her as she finally gathered the courage to step into the hall. The long house tables had been moved aside, and the few students who remained over the holidays were seated at a table in the center of the hall with the staff. Following the headmaster's gaze, the rest of the staff as well as the students looked over to Severus and Hermione. The staff with pleasant smiles on their faces, and the students looking in shock at the woman standing by the Potion Master's side, holding a baby in her arms. The students weren't aware of the child's parentage, so they had just assumed that Professor Snape had been sent to accompany Hermione safely to the school that afternoon.  
  
Hermione recognized a couple of the students from her own time as a student at Hogwarts. One girl in particular, with a long mane of red hair, gasped as she rose out of her seat and rushed to embrace her old friend. Try as she may, Hermione could not stop the tears from forming as she leaned into the arms of Ginny Weasley.  
  
"Merlin, Hermione! It is so good to see you! I've missed you so much!" she cried as she looked down to the baby, smiling, "It looks as though we've got a lot of catching up to do!"  
  
"I've missed you too, Ginny! More than you could ever know," Hermione replied in a choked voice, as they made their way to the table. Severus pulled out a chair for her, next to Ginny, and took the seat between Hermione and the Headmaster for himself.  
  
After greeting the rest of the staff, Hermione took a few minutes to ask Ginny about Harry and Ron.  
  
"I received a letter from Mum with my Christmas gifts, and she says that the boys are doing fine. They keep asking about you, wondering if anybody has heard from you. They have been quite worried since you didn't keep in touch over the summer. But now, I understand why you didn't. You haven't told them yet, have you?"  
  
"Ginny, I want to tell them. But, it's something that I need to tell them in person, and you know that they will not be home from training for quite some time yet. I just sent an owl yesterday letting them know that I'm fine, and that I have news to tell them when they return."  
  
She missed the mischievous twinkle that momentarily flickered in Ginny's eyes.  
  
Hermione sighed wistfully, "You don't know how much I miss them. It's like two-thirds of me is missing. Ron and Harry have been a part of my life for so long... and now, it seems as though we've been apart forever."  
  
They continued chatting for a few minutes, as Ginny brought her up to date on the rest of the Weasley clan. A short time later, Hermione looked around at the rest of the staff, frowning as her eyes lingered on the two remaining empty seats.  
  
"Isn't Remus here yet?" she asked, while wondering who the second empty seat might belong to.  
  
"He shouldn't be much longer, Miss Granger," the headmaster replied knowingly.  
  
No sooner were the words out of his mouth when Severus nudged her gently, directing her gaze to the doorway. There stood Remus, and standing by his side was Hermione's mother. Hermione gasped, whispering excitedly to Severus, "Did you know about this?" She didn't wait for an answer as she handed the baby over to Severus, and nearly toppled her chair over as she rushed to greet her mother.  
  
After a long, tearful embrace with her mother, Hermione turned to Remus and hugged him fiercely.  
  
"Is there anything you wouldn't do for me, Remus? This is the best Christmas gift you could have given me!" she sobbed before turning back to her mother. And then it hit her... how could she not have noticed it before? Her mother was *standing*! On her own! No wheelchair, no walker. She held a mahogany walking stick, and was leaning on Remus for support, but nevertheless, she was standing!  
  
"Oh, Mum! Can you walk?" she cried. Elizabeth smiled through her tears as Hermione took her other arm, helping to support her as the three of them walked back to the table. Remus gently assisted Elizabeth into her seat, as Hermione approached Severus and lifted her son from his arms.   
  
"Mum, would you like to meet your grandson?"  
  
Elizabeth nodded tearfully as she beamed at Hermione, her arms outstretched to receive the child.  
  
"Mum, I would like to introduce you to Samuel Remus Granger," Hermione looked down at her son and smiled as she cooed to the child, "Samuel, this is your Grandmum!"  
  
"Oh, Hermione! He is beautiful! Your father would be so proud, and honored that his first grandchild is his namesake."  
  
"I wish he were here, Mum," Hermione whispered hoarsely, "I miss him so."  
  
"So do I, dear... so do I," Elizabeth sighed.  
  
*****  
  
The Christmas Feast was as wonderful as Hermione had remembered from the few times she remained at the school for the holidays. After everybody had their full, and the students returned to their dorms, conversation turned to the subject of Hermione and Samuel.  
  
"Hermione, since you left us last summer, have you given any additional thought to our offer?" Minerva asked.  
  
"Professor McGonagall, having to turn down that offer was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I do hope you understand why I couldn't stay."  
  
"Of course, child! Now that I know why," she eyed Severus, "I do understand how hard it would have been for you to stay. But what do you plan to do now? Have you made any decisions about furthering your education."  
  
"I'm afraid that I can not, at this moment. I have no means of supporting my son and attending University at the same time."  
  
Severus opened his mouth to speak, but Elizabeth beat him to it, "Hermione, I wanted to discuss that with you. Is there some where that we could have some privacy?"  
  
Albus answered, "Why don't you use the staff room? I'm sure Remus and Severus would be happy to show you the way."  
  
As the four of them walked through the corridors, Elizabeth stared in wonder at the beauty of the castle and all its enchantments.  
  
"Hermione! No wonder you never wanted to leave this place!", she gasped in awe.  
  
Hermione gushed, "Isn't it wonderful, Mum? I thought it would be awkward to come back, but now it seems as though I never left. Honestly, I don't even know why I was so scared to return today."  
  
Severus and Remus escorted them into the staff room, where Remus helped Elizabeth to get comfortable in a chair by the fire as Hermione took a moment to fuss over Samuel. There was a tray of coffee and pastries waiting for them, and they each sat in silence for a few moments while they enjoyed their refreshments.  
  
When they were finished, Elizabeth invited Remus to stay, but turned to Hermione and raised an eyebrow towards Severus.  
  
To Hermione's relief, Remus addressed Elizabeth, "Elizabeth, I don't believe you've been properly introduced to Professor Snape."  
  
He turned to Severus, "Severus, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Dr. Elizabeth Granger. Elizabeth, Professor Severus Snape."  
  
Severus extended his hand towards Elizabeth and they exchanged a short greeting before Hermione spoke up, "I'd like Severus to stay, as well, Mum."  
  
"Very well, Hermione," Elizabeth replied, silently wondering if Severus was a close friend as Remus was to her daughter. She knew that Hermione had been a favorite of most of her teachers, but she seemed to recall a few remarks about a "greasy git" and wondered if those comments had been in reference to the man who was now sitting next to her daughter. And if so, how did they end up being friends?  
  
There was an awkward silence before Hermione asked, "What was it that you wanted to speak to me about, Mum?  
  
"I guess I should start by telling you that, though I am getting better every day, there is still some nerve damage that may prevent me from returning to work. My hands just don't work the way they should, and they may never be the same again."  
  
"Oh, Mum!" Hermione cried.  
  
Elizabeth held up a hand to silence her, as she continued, "Hermione, your father had been planning on our retirement for a few years now. Not that we expected to retire any time soon, but it's never too early to think about these things. Last year, we took on an associate. Somebody who we felt would be very capable to take over the practice a few years down the road. Thank goodness that we did, as it is such a relief to know that everything is in good hands... since the accident."  
  
"Between some financial investments that you father made over the years, the sale of the practice and," Elizabeth closed her eyes as her voice dropped to a hoarse whisper, "the insurance settlements," she took a deep breath before she continued, "I shall be financially secure enough to take an early retirement."  
  
"You may wonder what this has to do with you, Hermione," Elizabeth looked into Hermione's eyes as she continued, "I know how much your education means to you. I know how much it must hurt to have to give up on your dream..."  
  
Hermione interrupted "Mum, Samuel is the most important thing in my life right now. He is worth giving up my dreams for."  
  
"I realize that, Hermione! And I am so proud of you for having the strength and the courage to put him first! But, if you will allow me to help you, there is no reason for you to give up your dreams! Please let me help you, so you can continue your education."  
  
Hermione stared wide-eyed at her mother for a few moments, "Mum... I really appreciate what you want to do for me. But I can't take money from you."  
  
"Then consider, Hermione, coming home," Elizabeth replied. "Come back to London. Keep me company in that lonely house full of memories, and in return, I can help with Samuel while you attend a local University."  
  
Hermione's mouth couldn't seem to form any words, as she gaped back at her mother. Before she could compose herself, a deep silky voice quietly cut in.  
  
"I'm afraid I can not allow that to happen." 


	10. Confrontation, part 1

Author's Note: This is a bit of a short chapter, but it's one of my favorites and I wanted to go ahead and post it so I can spend some time revising a few segments of the next chapter.  
  
A special thank you to my reviewers. It means a lot to me, and gives me the courage to continue.  
  
Thank you to everybody who has read my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 9 ~ Confrontation  
  
Severus sat in shock for a moment after hearing Elizabeth's proposal to help Hermione with her education, asking her to return home to live.   
  
She couldn't go! If she left, she would take Samuel, and he was not prepared to be separated from his son! Almost without thinking, he replied, "I'm afraid that I can not allow that to happen."  
  
Hermione shot him a nervous glance, "Severus, please..."  
  
"No, Hermione. You. Can. Not. Leave." He spoke slowly as he fought for control.  
  
"And who do you think you are, to 'Not Allow' my daughter to make this decision?" Elizabeth fumed.  
  
Severus shot to his feet, "I am Samuel's father, that's who!" he hissed before turning in a billow of black robes and storming out of the room. Remus hurried after him, catching him a short way down the corridor.  
  
"Severus, wait..."  
  
"Lupin, I'm not in the mood..."  
  
"Haven't you learned anything, Snape? What do you think you will resolve by walking away... again! Go back in there and talk to Hermione! Tell her why you don't want her to leave, before she makes up her mind to go!"  
  
Severus began to pace as he fumed. Lupin was right. He had hurt Hermione too many times by walking away. He was not about to risk their already delicate relationship, nor the bond with his son, by repeating the mistakes of his past.  
  
"How can I go back in there now, Remus? I've been so stupid..."  
  
Remus approached him and clapped him on the back, "Come on, Severus. I'll go with you."  
  
Severus nodded, running his fingers nervously through his hair before taking a deep breath as Remus opened the Staff Room door.  
  
*****  
  
Elizabeth gaped at Hermione, as the girl fought back tears when Severus stormed out.  
  
"When were you going to tell me, Hermione." Elizabeth asked quietly.  
  
Hermione replied in a whisper, "I had planned to tell you the next time I saw you, Mum. I didn't know you would be here today, and it needed to wait until we had some privacy. Since you were here, I had hoped to tell you tonight, I was just waiting for the right moment."  
  
Elizabeth spoke in a hoarse voice, "I understand why you were waiting for some privacy. What I don't understand is why you were hiding the truth all year. Did he..." she paused for a deep breath before she continued, "did he hurt you?"  
  
"Oh no, Mum! It wasn't like that!"  
  
"Then what was it, Hermione? From what you've spoken of Professor Snape in the past, he certainly wasn't the type of man you would have had an... affair with."  
  
"No Mum, nothing like that, either. It's a long story and I hardly know where to begin..." she broke off before continuing.  
  
"Mum, believe me when I say, Severus never hurt me, never took advantage of me... I am just as much responsible as he is, yet it is not what I would call an affair. He saved my life during the final battle of the war, and at a very vulnerable moment afterwards, it just... it just happened."  
  
"Why did you run?"  
  
"When I realized that I was pregnant, I was still reeling from the news of your accident... especially in shock over Dad's death. I was alone and scared and didn't know what to do. So I ran. From Severus, from you, from my friends and teachers. It wasn't until Remus came along that I realized that I needn't have been so stupid."  
  
By this time, they were both in tears. It took all of Elizabeth's strength to stand and walk over to Hermione, where she collapsed onto the sofa, taking her daughter in her arms.  
  
"Shh... it's OK. I'm sorry, Hermione. I wish I could have been there for you."  
  
"It wasn't your fault, Mum. You couldn't help what had happened to you... or Dad!" she sobbed.  
  
"Hermione, your father would be very proud of you, you know? Regardless whether you continue your education or not... he would be proud of the strong and courageous young woman who has faced up to her mistakes, and is striving to raise his grandson the best she can."  
  
"Mum, you don't know how much it means to me that you are willing to help me. But I can't give you an answer. Not yet. I need to consider Samuel... and Severus. Though we've had rough moments, we're trying to smooth things over for Samuel's sake. And he is a wonderful father, Mum! It wouldn't be fair to take Samuel away from him when he's grown so close to him. He loves his son, Mum. It may be the only love he's ever known, how can I take that away from him?"  
  
"My offer still stands, Hermione. I would be honored if you would consider it. I won't push you, though. I know that you will do what is best for your son, and I do not expect you to make any promises just to make me happy. It's your happiness, and Samuel's, that matters."  
  
"I couldn't agree more," a quiet voice spoke from the doorway.  
  
"Severus!" Hermione gasped in relief.  
  
Elizabeth began to rise as she addressed Severus, "Professor Snape, I believe I owe you an apology," she began as she extended her hand to him.  
  
He grasped her hand gently in both of his, "Please, call me Severus. And there is no need to apologize. It is I who should apologize to you."  
  
"Apology accepted, Severus," she replied as she returned to her seat, "Please, sit with us. I think it's time that I get to know my grandson's father."  
  
Severus was flustered as he tried to speak, "And I would be... pleased... to get to know Samuel's Grandmother as well."  
  
Remus stepped behind Hermione and gently squeezed her shoulder, looking at her with a reassuring smile before the four of them sat down to spend the evening becoming better acquainted.  
  
*****  
  
Later that evening, Remus and Severus excused themselves for a few minutes, giving Hermione and Elizabeth some time alone to say their goodbyes.  
  
"Thank you for coming, Mum," Hermione replied as she embraced her mother, "Won't you come stay with me for the evening? I'm worried about you being alone now."  
  
Elizabeth smiled regretfully as she replied, "Thank you, dear, but I really don't think that you need to be burdened with your mother, not when you've got your hands full with Samuel as well."  
  
"Mum! You could never be a burden!" Hermione chastised.  
  
"Thank you, sweetheart... but I really must insist on going home. I've only been home a few days, and the longer I stay here, the harder it will be to return... and the sooner I get accustomed to being in that house all alone, the better it will be for me."  
  
They walked down to the Entrance Hall, where Remus and Severus were waiting for them. Remus and Severus assisted the women into their winter cloaks, as Remus said, "Our carriage is waiting, Elizabeth."  
  
Severus spoke up, "It's snowing quite heavily now. Remus has invited us to share their carriage to Hogsmeade, rather than us walk to the gates with Samuel in this weather."  
  
"That's a wonderful idea. I don't know if I am up to a long walk, myself. I never expected my first day out to be so exhausting!" Hermione smiled.  
  
As they rode in to Hogsmeade, Hermione asked, "I wondered how you got here today, Mum. I knew it would not have been an easy walk for you."  
  
"Remus met me in London," Elizabeth smiled, "from there, we caught the train to Hogsmeade where Professor Dumbledore had the carriage awaiting us. Remus will accompany me, again, on the train ride back to London."  
  
"And I will escort you to your house, as well," Remus smiled.   
  
"No need, Remus. I can catch a taxi as I did earlier today."  
  
"As will I. I wish you had let me accompany you on the cab ride to the train station earlier this afternoon as well."  
  
Hermione smiled at the exchange. Her mother had always been a strong, independant woman. And she knew that Remus, ever the gentlman, would insist on seeing her mother home safely, regardless.  
  
When the carriage reached the outskirts of Hogsmeade, not far from Hermione's cottage, they exchanged one final goodbye. Hermione embraced her mother, and then turned to Remus.  
  
"How can I ever thank you, Remus?" she sighed.  
  
"Just be happy, Hermione. Your smile is thanks enough."  
  
Severus stepped out of the carriage, and reached up to receive Samuel into his arms before raising a hand up to assist Hermione to the ground. As the carriage carrying Remus and Elizabeth pulled away to take them to the Hogsmeade station, Severus once again offered the crook of his arm for Hermione to hold on to as they walked the short distance to the cottage.  
  
When they arrived, Severus helped to get Samuel settled in for the night before heading back to the school. As he walked away, he heard her call to him and he paused and turned in the doorway as she smiled at him, "Good night, Severus."  
  
"Good night, Hermione," he hesitated for a moment, as though he wanted to say something else. The corners of his mouth twitched into a brief smile as he hastily added, "Merry Christmas," before he walked out the door.  
  
After Severus closed the door behind him, he paused and looked back towards the window of the room where his son lay sleeping. He smiled to himself before apparating back to the gates of Hogwarts. As he walked up to the castle, he paused near the lake to look up at the star-lit sky, speckled with gently falling snowflakes, "For once in my life, it is a Merry Christmas," he whispered to himself, remembering the way Hermione had smiled when she bid him good night.  
  
*****  
  
"Merry Christmas," Severus said before he walked out. He had closed the door behind him before Hermione could respond.   
  
Hermione changed from her dress robes and into a dressing gown before settling down in front of the fire with a cup of tea. She was sitting there, staring pensively at the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree, remembering the crooked smile on his face as he bid her good night.  
  
"Merry Christmas, Severus," she sighed to herself.  
  
A few minutes later came a knock at the door. Wondering who it could be at this late hour, she opened the door just a crack and gasped in shock at the green eyes that were smiling at her from the other side.  
  
"Harry!" 


	11. Confrontation, part 2

Author's Note: I had so much fun writing this chapter, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. :)  
  
Thank you again to my reviewers. Every word builds my confidence a bit more, and encourages me to follow where my heart is leading me with this story.  
  
Thank you to everybody who has read my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Chapter 10 ~ Confrontation, Part 2  
  
"Happy Christmas, Hermione!" Harry cried as Hermione opened the door wide and flung herself into his arms.  
  
"Harry, what are you doing here?" she asked tearfully as she broke from his embrace and ushered him into the cottage.  
  
"Er... Well, Ginny sent an owl to her mum telling her that you were at Hogwarts today. Ron and I had a few days break for the holiday and were visiting the Burrow when the letter came. Once I heard you were home, I couldn't stay away. Ron couldn't get away just yet... the whole family is home for Christmas, and he wanted to stay and catch up with them. He may come by tomorrow." He smiled, "The entire Weasley clan sends their love."  
  
"Apparently, I just missed you at the castle. Professor Dumbledore told me where I could find you," he explained.  
  
"Did he, or Ginny, tell you... anything else?" Hermione asked nervously.  
  
"No, Hermione. Just that you had been at the school, and that you were doing well," Harry replied. "Now, what is this important news that you wanted to share with me? Does it have anything to do with your disappearance over the summer?" he asked as he removed his cloak.  
  
Hermione took a deep breath and replied, "Harry, it will be easier for me to show you than to tell you..." he looked confused as she led him down the hallway and into the bedroom. Harry sucked in his breath when she led him to the cradle where her son lay sleeping, "His name is Samuel," she said quietly.  
  
"Merlin, Hermione! Who... When..." feeling flustered, he paused for a moment before asking, "Why didn't you tell me?"  
  
"It's a long story, Harry..." she sighed.  
  
"He's so tiny!" Harry said in a hushed voice as he knelt down near the cradle and reached his hand in to gently stroke Samuel's cheek, "Hermione... I don't know what to say."  
  
"He's beautiful!" Harry exclaimed as he rose to his feet and embraced her, "Congratulations, Hermione!" He stepped back and smiled, "You don't have to tell me anything, if you're not ready..."  
  
"No, Harry. I've got nothing to hide anymore," Hermione took his hand and led him back to the living room. She poured him a cup of tea before sitting next to him in front of the fire, and began to tell him about Samuel.  
  
When she paused to take a deep breath as she reached the events in the Forbidden Forest, Harry broke in.  
  
"I'll kill him, Hermione! How could that... that bastard do this to you?"  
  
"Harry! No! You don't understand!"  
  
"What don't I understand? That greasy, no good..." he ran his fingers through his messy mop of black hair as he rose from his seat and began to pace, "he forced you, didn't he?"  
  
"No, Harry! Please listen to me! He didn't force me!" Hermione stood up and faced Harry, trying to get him to listen to her.  
  
Harry grabbed her shoulders and looked into her eyes, "The truth, Hermione! Did. He. Hurt. You?" he demanded, gently yet firmly.  
  
"Why does everybody keep asking me that? First Remus, then Mum, and now YOU! I wouldn't be surprised if even Severus thinks..." she paused and gasped in realization as she plopped back onto the sofa, bowing her head into her hands.  
  
"No! Oh no no... no..." she said in a voice so low that it was barely audible.  
  
"Of course! How could I have been so blind!" she groaned, "He's not angry with me, he's angry with himself! And not for what he said to me, but for what he thinks he DID to me."  
  
"Now it all makes sense, Harry," she whispered quietly, "I think... Severus may believe that... that he raped me!"  
  
Harry looked at her in confusion, "And you say that he didn't? Then how could he think that he DID?" he asked incredulously.  
  
"Oh, Harry..." Hermione cried, as she told him the rest of the story.  
  
When she finished, Harry paused in thought before asking, "So, he really doesn't remember?"  
  
"No, Harry! He only saw flashes of my memory! Those bits and pieces that he put together must have led him to the wrong conclusion! Honestly, how could I have been so stupid! I have spent so much time blaming myself, when all along he thought..." she broke off.  
  
"It would explain so much... about his behavior. And all this time, I thought it was because of what I did to him... but don't you see, Harry, it's because of what he thinks that HE did to ME!"  
  
Tears rolled down Hermione's face as Harry embraced her, "Hermione, his relationship with you and Samuel must mean a lot to you if it's got you this upset. If what you say is true, then you need to talk to him. Make him see the truth."  
  
"I want Severus to be a part of Samuel's life. He wants it too. And that means the world to me! But he is so distant... there is so much tension in the air when he comes to visit, and that can't be good for our son! I want him to have two parents who get along, but the way it is now, we hardly even talk..."   
  
Realizing that she was rambling, Hermione's voice drifted off as she wiped her eyes with her hand and looked at Harry, "You're right, Harry, I need to see him. I just don't know how to make him see the truth!"  
  
They sat in silence for a while, Harry holding and comforting Hermione as she cried into his robes. They stayed that way until Hermione fell asleep in his arms.   
  
Early the next morning, Harry gently pulled away from Hermione and had just put on a pot of coffee when he heard a knock on the door. Harry, thinking that it might be Ron, decided to let Hermione continue sleeping on the sofa and answered the door himself. To his surprise, it wasn't Ron. He broke into a wide grin as he met the smiling face of Remus Lupin.  
  
"Harry! I didn't expect to see you here!" Remus exclaimed as he stepped inside and embraced the young man who was like a nephew to him, "Merlin, Harry! When did you get so tall?" he asked jovially, clapping Harry on the back.  
  
"Where is Hermione?" Remus asked as he removed his cloak.  
  
"Still sleeping. She had a bit of a rough night," Harry began to explain.  
  
"Trouble with Severus?" Remus asked in concern.  
  
"From what Hermione told me last night, the trouble with Professor Snape is nothing new," Harry brooded.  
  
"Harry?" a sleepy voice called from the sofa. Both men looked over as Hermione sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Remus! What are you doing here so early?" she smiled.  
  
"Good morning, Hermione! I just got back, and wanted to see that Severus got you home safely last night," he paused and looked at her in concern, "did something happen? Harry mentioned that you had a rough night."  
  
Hermione frowned, remembering the conversation she had with Harry late last evening. Sensing that she needed something to help her wake up before talking to either of them, Harry went to the kitchen and returned with three mugs of steaming coffee. Hermione sighed as the strong flavor brought her to her senses. Suddenly, something seemed amiss.  
  
"Samuel! Where is he? He never woke up..." she fretted, realizing that he hadn't been up for any nighttime feedings. She rushed to the bedroom, nearly running to the cradle, where she bent down and pressed her cheek to his chest to feel the rise and fall of his steady breathing.  
  
"Hermione? What's wrong?" Remus asked, his brow furrowed in concern as he entered the bedroom with Harry trailing behind him.  
  
Hermione looked up with a sheepish grin, "He's fine," she breathed a sigh of relief, "The little angel slept through the night! It's never happened before, so I thought..."  
  
She sighed, "I'm just being silly."  
  
"No, Hermione..." Remus smiled, "You're being a mother!"  
  
They all laughed, as she woke Samuel up for his morning feeding. As she sat there nursing her son, Remus comforted her with a few tales that James had told him, many years ago, about Lily acting the same way when Harry was an infant. Harry looked on, wistfully, enjoying the stories about his parents. Thinking about his parents reminded him of what had happened to Hermione's parents, and he asked her about her mother.  
  
"She is doing very well, Harry! She is walking again... as a matter of fact, she joined us at Hogwarts for the Christmas Feast yesterday!" she beamed a smile at Remus as she said this, and as she was getting ready to ask how her mother's return trip to London went, she remembered the remark he had made when he arrived earlier.   
  
She furrowed her brow as she asked him, "Remus... you said you just got back this morning? Where have you been?"   
  
"Well... er... I saw your mother home safely, and she invited me in to warm up with a cup of tea. It was getting late, and the snow had started up again... she insisted on putting me up in the guest bedroom for the night."  
  
"I see," said Hermione, trying to surpress a smile. She looked at Harry, who had an odd grin on his face as he winked at her.  
  
Remus changed the subject, "And why don't you tell me what had you so upset that you cried yourself to sleep on Harry's shoulder?"  
  
Hermione sighed, "I've been so wrong about things, Remus. I just realized... and I think I may be right... that Severus might have the wrong idea about what happened that night, in the Forbidden Forest."  
  
Remus tried to hide a knowing smile as he asked, "How so?"  
  
"Remus, do you think it possible that Severus misunderstood my memories? That he believes that he may have... forced me?" she asked quietly.  
  
Remus sighed, "Hermione, I have suspected that may be the case. I didn't know for sure, and didn't want to trouble you with it. I was waiting for HIM to figure it out. I didn't expect that you would be the one to come to that conclusion," he smiled at her, "but you always were quick to figure things out."  
  
"Oh, Remus! What do I do now?"  
  
"Go to him, Hermione! Make him see the truth. Things will never be right unless you two make amends, and that will not happen as long as he continues to blame himself."  
  
Remus offered to take care of Samuel for the rest of the morning, giving Hermione the opportunity to go see Severus. She was a bit reluctant to leave her son, though she knew that he was in capable hands. It would be the first time that she would be separated from him since his birth.  
  
"Hermione, we'll be fine. And Harry is here, if we need anything I will send him to fetch you."  
  
She reluctantly agreed, and left as quickly as possible before she had a chance to lose her nerve.  
  
After apparating at the gates, she hurried across the school grounds, rushing into the school and heading straight for the dungeons. Not knowing where his private quarters may be, she checked his office, and then the Potions classroom. He wasn't in either room. Her eyes began to tear as she wondered where to go next.  
  
"Dumbledore!" she whispered, knowing that the headmaster would be able to help her locate Severus. She rushed out of the classroom and turned the corner, not looking where she was going, and collided with Severus.  
  
"Hermione! What are you doing here? Is something wrong... is it Samuel?" he asked worriedly as he reached out to steady her on her feet.  
  
"No, Samuel is fine," she paused to catch her breath, "but something IS terribly wrong, and we need to talk."  
  
*****  
  
Severus heart skipped a beat as he collided with Hermione outside of the Potion's classroom. He looked into her tearful eyes and asked, "Hermione! What are you doing here? Is something wrong... is it Samuel?"  
  
"No, Samuel is fine."  
  
Severus breathed a sigh of relief as Hermione paused to catch her breath, "But something IS terribly wrong, and we need to talk."  
  
Furrowing his brow, he took her by the arm and led her past his office to the entrance of his private quarters. He rushed to remove the wards and whispered the password, ushering her inside.  
  
"Severus..." she sobbed.  
  
When she couldn't continue through her tears, he began to grow concerned again "What is wrong Hermione?" he asked as he held her gently by the shoulders.  
  
"All this time, Severus... all this time, I thought you understood. But you didn't understand at all! About what happened that night in the forest..."  
  
He abruptly let go of her, turning away as he wearily ran one hand over his eyes, "Hermione, I have told you before, I do understand. After what I did to you..."  
  
"That's just it, Severus! You didn't DO anything to me! Nothing that I couldn't have stopped if I wanted to!"  
  
"I saw what I did, Hermione! I hurt you, and I know that I will never be able to make it up to you!" he snapped as he began to pace the room.  
  
She rounded on him and grabbed his hand, "You didn't hurt me, Severus!" she cried, "you only THINK that you did, because you only saw bits and pieces of my memories of that night! You've come to the wrong conclusion!"  
  
"The wrong conclusion? I KNOW what I saw," he snarled as he tried to pull away. Hermione reached out and grasped his other hand.  
  
"No, Severus! Stop being so bloody stubborn and listen to me!" she demanded.  
  
"Don't you see, Severus? Think about it. You only saw flashes of my memory, and when you put it all together, you were convinced that you had raped me!"  
  
"But you didn't force anything on me that I didn't want!"  
  
He sneered as he hissed, "You wouldn't have wanted me..."  
  
"Oh, but I did! Heaven help me Severus, but I did want you! I didn't know it until right then, at that moment, it just seemed so right..."  
  
She reached her hand up and forced him to look at her.  
  
And finally, as Severus looked into her wide brown eyes, he could see the truth in them.   
  
Severus took a shuddering breath as he pulled her closer, asking in a hoarse voice, "Is it true?"  
  
As Hermione pulled back and looked again into his eyes, Severus couldn't resist reaching his hands up to cup her face, brushing her tears away with his thumbs. Before she could answer, he leaned down and murmered, "I've been a fool," as he captured her soft lips in a gentle kiss. 


	12. Learning to Live Alone

Author's Note: I've been trying hard to strike the right balance between angst and fluff throughout this chapter, knowing that too much of either would ruin the moment. I do hope that I have managed to accomplish this.  
  
This is the last of the chapters that I had written prior to posting this story on this site. I have a lot of scenes ready for the next few chapters, but have to work on tying it all together. I hope to continue updating regularly, but probably not nearly as often as I have been.  
  
Once again, thank you to my reviewers. I only hope that I can live up to your expectations. Thank you also to everybody else who has read my story, especially those of you who are still here :) All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment  
  
*******  
  
Chapter 11 ~ Learning to Live Alone  
  
Hermione was breathless when Severus pulled away after a few brief moments. She looked into his eyes and barely managed to whisper, "I should get back to Samuel..."  
  
Finding himself unable to speak, Severus nodded and escorted her out of his quarters. They walked silently to the Entrance Hall. As she began to walk through the door, Severus tentatively reached out his hand and grasped her shoulder. She turned towards him as he whispered, "Thank you."  
  
She smiled nervously at him before pulling away from his grasp and starting for home.  
  
When she arrived at the cottage, she was surprised as she stepped through the door to see not two, but three men hovering over her son. She squealed in delight as familiar face of the tall readheaded man turned and smiled at her. He met her halfway, sweeping her into his arms and spinning her around, placing a kiss on the top of her head as he set her back on her feet.  
  
Hermione was startled at Ron's open display of affection. With Harry, it was always so natural, but Ron had always been a bit more reserved... embarassed, even, to be seen hugging his best friend.  
  
"Why, Ron... I never knew you cared!" she winked as she teased him.  
  
Ron blushed as he replied, "I've missed you, Hermione. I took so much for granted when the three of us were together for all of those years... but seeing you now, after not knowing where you were for so long..." he broke off and sighed, as he flashed a brilliant smile at her, "I'm just relieved to know that you're here, and you're OK. That's what's important."  
  
Harry walked over to the two of them, jokingly asking, "Can I get in on some of this action?"  
  
"If you think I'm going to kiss you, Harry Potter..." Ron joked, as Hermione laughingly put one arm around his shoulders, and the other arm around Harry's. The infamous Gryffindor Trio was back together again.  
  
Ron squeezed his arm around Hermione's shoulder gently, and said quietly, "You're son is beautiful, Hermione. Despite having a greasy git of a father."  
  
Hermione breathed a sigh of relief. If the thought of anyone's reaction had worried her over the past few months, it was Ron's. She knew that he had fancied her a few years ago, and was afraid that he might resent coming back to find her with a child. Especially when the father of said child was none other than the man that Ron still considered to be the Evil Potion's Master.  
  
Harry whispered in her ear, "I told Ron everything, Hermione. I thought it might be for the best to give him some time to adjust to the idea before you returned."  
  
Hermione turned to Ron and placed a kiss on his cheek, "Thank you, Ron. You don't know how much it means to me to have you here..." she broke off as he smiled back at her, slipping his arm down to her waist as he squeezed her in reassurance.  
  
Remus interrupted as Samuel began to wail furiously, "I think your son is getting hungry... it seems he has an appetite to rival his Uncle Ron's."  
  
They all burst into laughter at this, as Hermione excused herself to spend a few private moments with Samuel. Being apart from him, even for such a short time, had not been easy, and she was looking forward to having a bit of time alone with him.  
  
*****  
  
Severus lingered in the Entrance Hall, watching until Hermione reached the gates of the school grounds and disapparated. He groaned as he thought about what he had just done, and as he turned around he met two bright blue eyes twinkling at him over a pair of half-moon spectacles.  
  
"Albus... How long have you been... er... I didn't realize you were there," Severus stammered as he avoided the Headmaster's gaze.  
  
"Severus, am I right to believe that you and Hermione have reconciled your differences?"  
  
Severus paused for a moment before responding in a stern voice, "I would hardly say that, Albus. She has forced me to see the truth, at last. We still have a lot of issues to resolve before we can have truly reconciled our differences. But," he shrugged, "it's a start."  
  
"The students will be back in a few days, Severus," Albus looked intently at Severus as he continued, "I suggest that you spend some more time visiting your son before term begins."  
  
Severus did not see the smirk on Albus' face as the Headmaster turned and walked away, humming to himself.  
  
*****  
  
After feeding Samuel and rocking him to sleep, Hermione started towards the living room just as Remus was opening the door to another visitor. In a billow of black robes, Severus entered the cottage, his dark eyes darting back and forth between Harry and Ron.  
  
The tension was thick as Harry and Ron approached their former professor. They stood before him in silence for a few moments. Surprisingly, it was Ron who first extended his hand to Severus, "Professor Snape," he nodded stiffly as Severus shook his hand. Harry was next, "Good to see you again, Professor," he said as he stepped forward and offered his hand.  
  
Severus quirked an eyebrow as he sized the two of them up, "Weasley, Potter," he nodded in return as he addressed each of them.  
  
"We were just on our way out," Harry explained as they approached Hermione.  
  
"We only had three days off for Christmas, and we need to get back to the Burrow and pack," Ron continued as he reached out to give Hermione a firm hug, "If he ever hurts you, Hermione..." he whispered.  
  
Hermione leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on Ron's cheek, "Don't worry about me, Ron. He's not as bad as you remember," she whispered in return as Ron continued to murmur some nonsense about what he would do to the "evil, greasy git".  
  
Harry was next, "Keep in touch this time, Hermione. It better not be another 6 months before we hear from you again," he said as he kissed her brow. Hermione tearfully gathered him into an embrace, "I will, Harry. I don't ever again want to spend that much time apart from the two of you!"  
  
Remus excused himself as well, "I'm going to accompany the boys back to the Burrow. I'd like to spend some more time hearing about their training. I'll see you later."  
  
Hermione stepped back, holding back a sob as she whispered to Ron and Harry, "Take care of yourselves..."  
  
The boys smiled at her and waved as they walked out of the door. Remus flashed Hermione a reassuring smile before turning to leave behind them.  
  
Hermione shook as she tried to hold back the sob that she felt forming deep within her. She was startled when she felt Severus step up behind her. She turned around and buried her face in his robes as she broke down and cried.  
  
*****  
  
Severus was startled as Hermione turned and buried her face in his robes, her body wracked with sobs. Hesitantly, he reached up and awkwardly began to pat her on the back as he let her cry into is shoulder.  
  
Only a few short weeks ago, he would not have understood an emotional outburst such as this. In his entire lifetime, he had never had anybody whose absence would have affected him in such a way. But now, his thoughts drifted to Samuel... and Hermione, as well. What would he do if they ever walked out of his life? He felt a cold shiver of fear down his spine, and he sighed as he silently resolved to find a way to make sure that Hermione would not return to London to live with her mother.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione didn't know how long she stood there, crying into Severus' robes as she felt his hand awkwardly patting her back, but it seemed like forever.  
  
Blushing, she eventually backed away, brushing the tears from her cheeks as she turned to go to her son. She was not aware that Severus had followed her to the bedroom, as she sat down and gently rocked the cradle, softly singing a lullaby as Samuel began to suck his thumb while she soothed him back to sleep.  
  
As she pulled a blanket over the child, she looked up and blushed as she realized that Severus was standing there, watching her.  
  
"You are... an amazing mother, Hermione," he whispered in awe as he stepped forward to look at his son.  
  
*****  
  
For the first time since Remus had taken Hermione under his wing, he did not keep his promise to return to the cottage that evening. Severus had left for the day, and Hermione had never felt so lonely in her life.  
  
She sighed, resigning herself to the fact that she would have to learn to be alone again in just a few short days when term would begin and their visits would likely be limited to weekends, when Remus and Severus didn't have classes.  
  
Over the next few days, Remus was absent from her life more than ever. He still visited regularly, but he always seemed to be in a hurry. Hermione began to wonder what kind of "errands" he had to tend to each time he left. As the beginning of the new term grew nearer, she convinced herself that he was preparing for classes. But sometimes she wondered if maybe he had tired of being with her.  
  
Severus, on the other hand, had continued his regular visits, and the two of them were beginning to become more comfortable in each other's presence. There was still a lot of tension between them, but it was a different kind of tension. Before, there was an uncomfortable silence between them due to their misunderstanding. Now, it was due to the burgeoning feelings that they were each afraid to admit to ever since the day that Severus had kissed Hermione. The tender moments they had shared later that same day, first while Severus comforted her, and later while they watched their son sleep, were the last moments that they had allowed themselves to be so close. But at least they were on better speaking terms, and Hermione found herself enjoying, even anticipating, his visits more than ever.  
  
Much to Hermione's dismay, the holidays came to an end, and she found herself dreading being alone.  
  
The first week was harder than she had expected it to be. Taking care of Samuel, alone, was utterly exhausting. Aside from Christmas, he had never slept through the night. And Hermione began to suspect that he was becoming colicky, as no amount of feeding, rocking, or singing could get him to sleep any more. He did not just cry, he screamed nonstop as Hermione paced the floor with him from midnight till dawn, when he would finally cry himself into exhaustion and pass out for an hour or two. Things weren't much better during the daytime, and Hermione began to suspect that he missed the comings and goings of the two men who used to help care for him every day. He fussed more than ever before, and Hermione found herself near tears every time Samuel demanded her atttention.  
  
Battling fatigue, Hermione hardly had the energy to eat, let alone keep up with the housekeeping (even with magic). And it was not only her house that was in a constant state of disarray. Lounging around in her dressing gown, her hair pulled into a sloppy bun, she didn't eat, she couldn't sleep, and by the weekend she found herself in a constant state of depression.  
  
She didn't know how much longer she could do this. For the first time since Christmas, she seriously began to think about her mother's offer to come home. 


	13. Can't Go On

Author's Note: This was a tough one. I had to totally scrap this chapter half way through, and rewrite it entirely before I could finish it. The transitions between POV's in this chapter may seem choppy, and I'm not exactly sure if I'm happy with the way things begin to unravel between Severus and Hermione. Ah, well... at least we get to see Snape returning to his old self by now.  
  
For anybody who may wonder about it, Hermione's experience with a colicky Samuel is based on my own experience with my first child. I wanted to keep the feelings of helplessness, fatigue, and sense of inadequacy as real as possible. I can't tell you how many times I had to run home to "my mommy", because I had convinced myself that I was a failure as a mother. The reason I wrote Hermione this way is twofold. 1) Plot Device 2) I wanted to show that, even if you're Hermione Granger, there are just some things that you can't learn from a book.  
  
Thank you again to my readers and reviewers. I do hope you that you will all continue to enjoy the story.   
  
As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 12 ~ "Can't Go On"  
  
The weekend couldn't come soon enough for Severus. The first week back to school had been hell for him. He thought that his classes would keep his mind off of his son, keep him from wondering how Hermione was faring this week by herself. He was confident that she could handle it... after all, this was Hermione Granger. If there was anything she couldn't do, surely she would find the answers in a book. So he immersed himself in his work, hoping that he could keep his mind off of what might be going on in that lonely cottage in the woods.  
  
It wasn't too difficult at first... his mind only wandering between classes or at mealtimes. But the nights were most difficult. By midweek, Severus found himself unable to sleep, and his usually sharp mind began drifting off during classes as well. He was tense, and tired, and a downright bastard by the end of the week. If he had been hard on the students before, his behavior had worsened tenfold.  
  
Merlin forbid that anybody turn in an assignment that was less than perfect. A misspelled word on an essay was enough to earn a loss of house points, any unfortunate student who made the mistake of turning in a vial of incorrectly brewed potion suffered a weeks worth of scrubbing bedpans with Filch, and heaven help this year's "Longbottom" (for there was always at least one student in each year with a knack for melting or exploding cauldrons), as they suffered the worst of his wrath... his sharp tongue. More than one student had fled his classroom in tears that week, earning Severus a conference with the Headmaster by the time the weekend rolled around.  
  
He was looking forward to Saturday, when he was due to visit his son for the first time in nearly a week. By Friday evening he couldn't wait any longer. He left directly after dinner, asking Remus Lupin to keep an eye on the Slytherins, and rushed to Hermione's cottage. His mood worsened as he stepped through the door and looked around at the house's state of disarray. He could hear Samuel crying loudly in the distance, but there was no sign of Hermione. Severus quickly made his way to the bedroom, where he came to a sudden stop in the doorway, inhaling sharply at the sight before him.  
  
Hermione was on the bed, Samuel crying in the crook of her arm, as she lay there staring blankly at the ceiling. He took in her disheveled appearance ~ tangled hair, milk stained T-shirt, and the river of tears running down her face as she shook with sobs.   
  
"Hermione?" his voice went hoarse as he stepped into the room and approached the bed. When she didn't respond, he gently removed Samuel from her arms. After reassuring himself that there was nothing physically wrong with his son, Severus cuddled the child into the warmth of his chest, murmuring a few soft words to him. Samuel's wailing ceased almost instantly, only letting out a few more choked sobs as he began to suck his thumb.  
  
Hermione's eyes drifted to Severus and the child, and she began to sob harder.  
  
Severus raised an eyebrow, demanding, "Hermione? What's wrong?"  
  
"I... I'm..." her voice broke as she continued to sob, "I c-can't do anyth-thing r-right," she hiccupped, "I am a t-t-terrible m-mother."  
  
Severus placed their now-sleeping son into his cradle and left the room, returning a few moments later with a glass of water. He encouraged Hermione to sit up and drink, only speaking again after her hiccups subsided.  
  
"Has it been like this every day?" he asked worriedly, his brow furrowed, and Hermione sniffled as she nodded her head. He handed her a handkerchief as he rose to his feet and looked down at her, "Tell me about it."  
  
"I can't do this anymore, Severus," Hermione whispered.  
  
"What do you mean by that?" he demanded.  
  
"It's just too much, Severus. I... I can't do this alone."   
  
"Get some rest, Hermione," he sighed. As he turned to leave the room, he heard her murmur, "I think... I think I'm going to go... go to my m-mother."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione slept fitfully for an hour, waking up feeling just a bit better than she had for most of the week. She looked over to her son and felt a pang of guilt mixed with relief that he was finally sleeping soundly. She decided to sneak away to wash up while he was still asleep. She hadn't had time to do more than wash her face and brush her teeth most of the past week, and she was hoping that he would spare her at least enough time for a quick shower before he was demanding her attention again.  
  
To her surprise, when she entered the bathroom, she found the tub filled with steaming water and thick, fragrant bubbles. She paused in wonder for a minute before she remembered... Severus was here.  
  
She turned back into the hallway, and down to the living room where she found Severus staring pensively into the fire. He seemed to do a lot of that, she thought as she approached him silently, sitting beside him on the sofa as she, too, began to stare into the flames.  
  
After a few tense moments of silence, she finally looked up at Severus. She forced herself to look at him, and saw his brow furrow as his eyes met with hers, and she knew that he must be terribly disappointed in her. She had already suspected that the softer side of Snape she had come to know would not last once classes began, but she had hoped that he wouldn't return to the snarky bastard he had always been to her up until a few weeks ago. But now, after the state that he had found her in tonight, she knew it would only be a matter of time for him to rail at her for neglecting her duties as a mother.  
  
Severus looked away and muttered, "Go, take your bath. I don't want to see you back out here until you've taken enough time to freshen up."  
  
As Hermione padded back down the hallway, she took another look back at Severus, who was still staring into the fire, and she wondered what he could be thinking.  
  
*****  
  
After he had left Hermione to get some rest, Severus had found himself pacing the living room, thinking about what she said and wondering what he could do to change her mind about leaving.  
  
Pausing for a moment, Severus again noticed the mess that he had walked into. He put the living room back in order with a few quick waves of his wand, and washed days-old dishes that had piled up beside the kitchen sink. Turning down the hallway to see what else she might have neglected this past week, he turned into the bathroom and was struck with an idea. He'd have a hot bath waiting for her when she awoke from her nap. After filling the tub with steaming water, he muttered a charm over the tub to keep the water fresh and hot until she was ready for it.  
  
He returned to the living room and lit the fireplace with his wand, before sitting down and staring into the brilliant flames. His mind once again drifted to Hermione. He had never seen her look so defeated. Judging by the dark circles under her eyes, it looked as though she hadn't slept all week, and he wondered what had happened to the woman that he had come to know over the past couple of weeks. Then he thought of Samuel, as he pondered what a future would be like without him if Hermione chose to leave. He didn't want her to go, but he couldn't force her to stay. He could only hope that he would be able to convince her to give it a few more days before she made up her mind.  
  
He didn't have much time to linger on those thoughts, as he heard Hermione emerge from the bedroom and make her way down the hallway only a few minutes later. He didn't look away from the fire until she sat down and began to stare blankly into the flames along side of him. What was he supposed to say to the distressed woman? They sat together in silence until Hermione finally looked up at him.  
  
"Go take your bath," he ordered, telling her not come back until she had freshened up. He turned back to the fire, waiting until he heard the click of the bathroom door closing before rising to pace the living room once more.  
  
His pacing led him into the kitchen, where he began to rummage through the pantry to find something for her to eat. From the state that the kitchen had been in earlier, he had noticed that the pile of dirty dishes had not been comprised of much more than some water glasses and coffee cups. A few toast crumbs scattered on the table were the only indication that she had eaten anything at all. He shook his head and sighed as he began to throw together something of sustenance for her.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione submerged herself into the steaming bath, reveling in the feel of the luxurious bubbles, allowing her head to slip down beneath the water for a moment. She pulled herself back up, brushing her sopping hair back from her face and the water from her eyes before leaning against the back of the tub and closing her eyes, inhaling deeply as she enjoyed the fresh melon scent of the bubble bath.  
  
She couldn't remember another bath that had ever felt this good, and she allowed herself a good long soak, nearly falling asleep as she let the water ease the tension from her body. By the time she opened her eyes again, the water had begun to cool, and the bubbles had evaporated. She quickly finished washing and shampooing, and sighed regretfully as she rose out of the water to dry off with a fluffy towel.  
  
She retrieved her dressing robe from the back of the door, and returned to the bedroom where she worked diligently to untangle her wet hair. She frowned as she wondered how she had allowed her hair, which only last week had been so luxuriously soft, to become so unkempt. By the time she finished fighting with her ratted locks, her hair had begun to dry and once again flowed down her back in soft waves.  
  
Hermione slipped into a fresh cotton nightgown, putting her dressing robe back on to keep herself warm. As she walked back down the hallway, she noticed that Severus was no longer sitting in front of the fire. In fact, she didn't see him at all. She turned into the kitchen to make herself a cup of tea, and gasped when she saw the plate of food set out on the table. Severus stepped into the room behind her, startling her as he spoke, "I don't know how you expect to take care of your son if you can't even take care of yourself. Sit... eat."  
  
As hungry as she was, she suddenly didn't have much of an appetite as she began to realize, once again, how much she must have disappointed Severus. Just as she began to pick at her salad, Samuel began to cry... and so did Hermione.  
  
*****  
  
There hadn't been much food in the pantry, and the icebox yielded nothing more than some wilting vegetables and a few leftovers from last weekend. Yet, Severus had somehow managed to salvage enough to put together a small garden salad, which he had topped with some bits of leftover ham that he had found unspoiled.  
  
After he prepared her salad, he had left to Owl the Headmaster, asking him have Remus bring a few days worth of food to the cottage. When he returned, Hermione was standing in the kitchen doorway, staring wide-eyed at the food he had set out on the table.  
  
"Sit... eat." he urged her. Hermione had just sat down at the table and begun picking at her salad when Samuel woke up. Near tears, she began to get up to go to him.  
  
"I thought I told you to eat!" Severus demanded, "I will take care of Samuel."  
  
He walked down the hallway, where he picked up his son and tried to soothe him. Settling him this time was not as easy as it had been earlier that evening, and Severus began to imagine what Hermione must have gone through if the child had been like this all week. When Samuel's crying finally subsided to choked sobs, Severus sat in the rocking chair with him and began to speak quietly to him.  
  
"What are you doing to your mother, child? You need to let her get some sleep!" Samuel began to wail furiously once again, "I've never seen you so unhappy before..." Severus paused and frowned as he began to wonder if something were wrong with the child. It was not like him to cry so furiously.  
  
Severus continued to rock the inconsolable child, looking up as he heard Hermione enter the room.  
  
"Did you eat?" he asked in concern.  
  
She nodded as she whispered, "Yes. Thank you," and held her arms out to take Samuel, "now it's his turn."  
  
Severus handed his son over to Hermione, growing even more concerned when she couldn't get the child to settle down enough to be fed. Finally, after they each took turns rocking, walking, bouncing, and soothing him in any way the knew how, Samuel finally opened his tiny mouth and let Hermione feed him.  
  
"What you must think of me now," she sniffled, "I'm a failure."  
  
"Hermione, I think you are overwhelmed and overtired," he tried to catch her eye, but she kept her gaze averted, looking intently at the child in her arms, "but, in no way, do I think you are a failure."  
  
"Yet, I would have to agree with your earlier statement," he took a deep breath, "you can not continue to do this alone."  
  
Hermione nodded, and said, "I think going to my mother's would be the best thing for me."  
  
Severus shot up out of his seat, trying to hold his temper as he snapped at her, "That is NOT what I am suggesting you do!"  
  
Hermione looked up at him in confusion, "Then what, Severus? I can't stay cooped up in this cottage the rest of the winter like this! I need help with Samuel, and I... I... I just need to get OUT!"  
  
"Hermione, please listen to me..." he began, only to be cut off.  
  
"Being alone all week... nowhere to go, nobody to talk to, alone to care for a child that never sleeps and cries all night... it's just too much!"  
  
"Miss Granger!" Severus snapped, reverting to 'teacher mode' to get her to pay attention, "Stop being so bloody insufferable and give me a chance to speak!"  
  
Hermione blanched. What was happening here? He was treating her like one of his insolent students. She lifted her chin in defiance and said, "You are no longer my teacher, Professor Snape," she hissed, "I will not allow you to speak to me like a child."  
  
"Then I suggest that you stop acting like one!" he sneered as he stalked out of the room. 


	14. Two Birds, One Stone

Author's Note: Thank you to my readers and reviewers, new and old alike. As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 13 ~ "Two Birds, One Stone"  
  
Severus had never been easy on his students, earning quite a fearsome reputation over the years. But, after the war, he had mellowed a bit. Not that much, really... it wasn't even obvious to those who did not know him well, but the closest of his colleagues had been aware of the subtle changes in the Potion's Master. He was still quite strict with the students, not allowing for any foolishness inside the classroom or out of it for that matter, yet he had begun to dole out his punishments a bit more fairly and, for the most part, had curbed his acid tongue.  
  
But this week... this week, they had seen him at his worst. Not even during the most stressful years that he had spent as a spy had they seen him this way. After the eighth student that week had fled his classroom in tears, Albus called Severus into his office to talk to him. Severus looked tense and tired, seeming to be easily distracted, and Albus could guess why.  
  
So that night, the first Friday after the start of the new term, after Severus asked Remus to keep an eye on his House and rushed out of the school, Albus had called Minerva into his office for tea, where they began to discuss what they could do to help ease the transition that Severus had to make from father to teacher each week.  
  
A few minutes into their conversation, Albus walked across his office to answer a tapping at his window, allowing entrance to a barn owl that he did not recognize. But he immediately recognized the writing on the letter. It was from Severus. His brow furrowed in concern when he read the short note, which was simply a request for Remus to bring some food down to Hermione's cottage.  
  
Minerva looked on in concern as Albus summoned a house elf and asked that a few days worth of food be prepared to go, before tossing a handful of floo powder into the fire and calling for Remus Lupin to come to his office immediately.  
  
They sat in silence for a few minutes until Remus arrived, smiling at both of them before asking with a slight note of concern in his voice, "What is it, Albus?"  
  
"What do you make of this, Remus?" Albus asked as he handed him Severus' note.   
  
Remus didn't know what to make of it, so he only nodded in reply as he spoke, "I'll go right away, Albus."  
  
Dobby appeared moments later with a large basket of food. In his enthusiasm to please the headmaster, the house elf had packed enough food to feed a small army. Remus smiled and thanked him before leaving to rush down to the cottage.  
  
"Minerva," Albus began after Remus left, "I fear that Severus is not the only one who is having trouble making this transition."  
  
"Albus, you know very well how concerned I have been about that girl! I will do anything I can to see that she gets help if she needs it. I only wish that she had let us help her last year, instead of running away. If only she had accepted our offer to stay, we could have..." Minerva didn't finish her sentence when she noticed the thoughtful look on Albus' face as he templed his fingers beneath his chin and spoke.  
  
"I think, Minerva, you may have just stumbled upon the solution to both problems."  
  
*****  
  
As Remus hurried across the grounds to the gates, he was shocked to see a tall figure heading towards him in a familiar billow of black robes.  
  
"Severus?" he asked in confusion, "I thought you were..."  
  
Severus interrupted, "YOU take care of the girl, Lupin!" He bit back a cutting remark before hissing, "If anybody can talk some sense into her, it would be you!" Severus didn't break his stride as he spat these words at Lupin. Severus was conflicted. Remus was always the one who was there to pick up the pieces, and Severus had begun to grow resentful of the werewolf's relationship with Hermione. On the other hand, he didn't want Hermione to be alone, and Remus was likely the only person that she could confide in. If she had to spend one more night alone, who knew what she might do?  
  
His mood got even fouler as he continued his trek to the school. He felt certain that she would leave now. If she hadn't already made that decision by now, he had probably driven her to it by storming out on her tonight. And could he blame her? When she most needed somebody by her side, he had left her. He ran his fingers through his hair as he wondered what the girl had done to him? The old Severus Snape would never have run from confrontation.  
  
As he entered the castle and turned towards the staircase to the dungeons, he was stopped by a voice calling to him, "Severus? I am glad that you are here. I'd like to have a word with you. Would you please come to my office?"  
  
Severus took a deep breath and forced himself to turn and face the Headmaster, "Can't it wait, Albus? I have had a most trying evening. I would like to return to my quarters. I feel the need to indulge in a strong drink."  
  
"No need to drink alone, Severus. Allow me to join you. Besides, there is something very important that we need to discuss, and the sooner the better."  
  
"Very well," Severus growled, as he turned once again to descend to the dungeons.  
  
When they reached his quarters, Severus poured them each a snifter of brandy. He downed his in one gulp, and poured himself another.  
  
"I've never known you to be a drinking man, Severus. Whatever happened to you tonight?"  
  
Severus merely sneered, as he downed his second drink and reached once again for the brandy. But Albus beat him to it, snatching the bottle out of his reach.  
  
As he looked intently into the bottle of amber liquid, Albus spoke softly, "I think that's quite enough, Severus. I need to speak to you while you are still sober."  
  
"Well then on with it, old man! So I can spend some time alone with my brandy." Severus brooded.  
  
"Very well, Severus. I realize that being away from your son all week has been difficult. I think that we - that is, Minerva and I - have found a way to ease the transition..." Albus didn't get to finish as Severus scoffed.  
  
"I don't think there will be any transition to ease, Albus. Hermione is returning to her mother's home."  
  
"I see."  
  
"Is that all you can say? Hermione is leaving and taking my son with her and all you can say is 'I see'?"  
  
"Are you certain that she will be going?" Albus asked.  
  
Severus rubbed his hands wearily over his eyes, and sat heavily in the chair across from Albus before responding, "It's been a long night, Albus. What is it that you wanted to discuss with me?"  
  
"I am sure you recall the offer that we extended to Miss Granger after graduation," Albus began.  
  
"Of course, Albus. And she made it abundantly clear that she was not interested in accepting."  
  
"I do not recall Hermione ever stating that she was not interested, Severus. Only that she could not accept."  
  
"What are you getting at?" Severus responded crossly.  
  
"I got the feeling that Hermione was indeed interested, but felt that she had no choice in the matter due to... circumstances. But those circumstances have changed, Severus. Wouldn't you agree?"  
  
"Get to the point!" Severus demanded.  
  
"My point is, Severus... you want to keep her close by so you can be with your son. Meanwhile, Hermione feels no choice but to go to her mother. A choice that she may make, not necessarily because she wants to go, but because she feels that she has nowhere else to go. If she accepts a position here, then it solves both problems."  
  
"How?" Severus quirked an eyebrow.  
  
"Think about it, Severus. Her apprenticeship here could be the first step in her education. If she accepts, she will be provided with her own quarters here at Hogwarts, with plenty of help available to her so she can begin her studies. Not only does that solve her problem, but yours as well. Your son will be right here, where you can see him every day."  
  
Severus pondered the idea for a few moments. It seemed so obvious now. The solution had been right in front of their eyes this whole time, how had they all been so blind? Yet, after tonight, Severus didn't want to get his hopes up. She might not want to have to live in such close proximity to him, after all.  
  
"And if she doesn't accept?" he asked with a sigh.  
  
"We'll cross that river when we get there, Severus," Albus replied before handing Severus the bottle of brandy and leaving the room. "IF we get there," he added quietly to himself as he made his way out of the dungeons.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione didn't have any tears left to cry. Samuel had fallen asleep again and, afraid that if she moved he would wake again, she sat rocking him for what seemed like hours before she heard a soft voice calling from the living room.  
  
"Hermione?" It was Remus.  
  
"In here," she answered softly.  
  
Remus entered the room, rushing over to kneel by her side asking gently, "What happened?"  
  
"I'd rather not talk about it, Remus."  
  
He patted her hand before rising to pull up a chair beside her.  
  
"I passed Severus on the way."  
  
Hermione leaned her head back against the chair and closed her eyes, but didn't respond.  
  
"I brought some food from the Hogwarts kitchens. Dobby has been very generous," Remus smiled, "Is there anything you need?"  
  
"Just a good night's sleep," Hermione muttered.  
  
"Let me help," Remus said quietly, as he moved to take Samuel from her arms. Hermione hesitantly turned her son over to Remus' care, rising from the rocking chair and inviting Remus to take her place. She walked over to the bed and crawled beneath the covers.  
  
"Thank you, Remus," she barely whispered before her eyes closed and she drifted off into a deep sleep.  
  
Remus placed Samuel in the cradle, not knowing what else to do, he sat in the rocking chair and kept vigil over mother and child until the wee hours of the morning.  
  
It was the first time that Samuel had slept for more than an hour at a time that week. When he finally woke up for a feeding, Hermione was feeling much better for having had a few hours of sleep. Rather than let her get up to go to her son, Remus carried Samuel to the bed and told her to lie there and relax while she fed him. By the time Samuel had finished nursing, Hermione had fallen back to sleep with him tucked close by her side. They both slept peacefully the rest of the night.  
  
*****  
  
As the sun began to rise, Remus quietly made his way to the kitchen, brewing a pot of coffee while fixing a light breakfast for Hermione. He conjured up a breakfast tray, and carried it to the bedroom laden with eggs, toast, a fruit cup and a steaming cup of coffee as well as some fresh Pumpkin Juice. Hermione was just beginning to stir, and smiled at him in gratitude as he placed the tray on her bedside table before picking up Samuel and settling down with him in the rocking chair.  
  
"That is the first time this week that he has slept at all during the night," she informed him.  
  
He looked at her in sympathy, asking, "Has it been that bad?"  
  
"Worse," Hermione replied with a yawn, as she pulled the breakfast tray on to her lap and began to pick at her food.  
  
"Eat, Hermione. It won't do Samuel any good to have a mother who isn't taking care of herself."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes, "You sound like Severus," she grumbled.  
  
Remus looked at her for a moment, "Is that what last night was all about?"  
  
Hermione sighed heavily as she began to tell Remus what had transpired the previous evening. The situation that Severus had walked in to, how he almost instantly got Samuel to sleep, how he cleaned the house and drew her a bath while she slept, how he scrounged up a meal for her. "It was all so simple, Remus. What I couldn't manage to do in an entire week, he accomplished in less than an hour."  
  
"Is that so bad?" Remus asked.  
  
"It's not that, Remus. It was all so sweet, and I did appreciate it. But it just made me feel so... so inadequate."  
  
"And that's why you fought with him?"  
  
"Not at all. Well, it may have led up to it." Hermione began to explain, "I told him that I can't do this, and that I am going to go live with my mother."  
  
Remus sighed, "And are you?"  
  
"I don't know, Remus! All I know for certain is that I can not go on like this!" she choked.  
  
"You don't have to anymore," spoke a gentle voice from the doorway. They both turned in surprise to find Albus Dumbledore standing there, smiling at them. 


	15. Something to Think About

Author's Note: Whew! This chapter sure had me stumped. But once I finally got rolling, the words just poured right out onto the keyboard. I hope you enjoy it!  
  
Thank you to my readers and reviewers, new and old alike. As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 14 ~ "Something to Think About"  
  
After the Headmaster had left his quarters the previous evening, Severus sat by the fire staring at the bottle of brandy that he still held in his hands. He never took another drink, but he couldn't seem to put it down. He swirled the amber liquid around in the bottle as he thought seriously about the Headmaster's suggestion.  
  
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he thought about what it would mean if Hermione accepted the offer.  
  
His son. HERE. Where he could see him every day. Visions of the future began to flash through his mind.  
  
Severus sitting on the floor encouraging Samuel to crawl... holding the boy's hand as he took his first step... hearing his child say "papa" for the first time... an eleven year old Samuel, with a face so like Severus' own, wearing school robes with the Slytherin crest, smiling with pride at his father... Quidditch and Potions and all things magical that Severus intended to teach his son.  
  
When he fell asleep, still sitting in front of the fire, those beautiful images changed to visions of his son growing up without a father... Hermione holding his hand instead of Severus... the boy never learning the meaning of the word "papa"... an eleven year old Samuel attending a muggle school, unaware that there was a magical world in which he belonged.  
  
He jolted awake and found himself drenched in a cold sweat. Looking down at the brandy he held in his hands, he hurled the bottle into the fire which erupted in blue flames as he cursed Hermione for even thinking about taking his son away.  
  
Severus spent the rest of the night wandering the corridors of the school, trying to clear his head. When the sun began to rise, he had to fight back the urge to run out of the school and to the cottage to shake some sense into the girl. He returned to his quarters and took a warm shower to ease his muscles, which were tense from sleeping in the chair for half the night, and then he headed to the Great Hall for breakfast.  
  
Severus frowned as he noticed that both Albus' and Remus' chairs at the Head Table were vacant. Had Albus gone so early this morning to visit Hermione? Severus was disappointed, he had hoped to be there. And Remus... the bloody werewolf must have spent the night with Hermione, Severus fumed. Having lost what little appetite he had arrived with that morning, he drank cup after cup of strong black coffee, glowering at any student who dared to look in his direction, before finally scraping back his chair and storming out through a side passage of the Great Hall.  
  
He made his way outside and stood in the brisk morning air, watching the sun's dazzling effect on the snowy ground, and waiting for the Headmaster's return.  
  
*****  
  
"I knocked on the front door, but nobody answered. I hope you don't mind that I let myself in," Albus said as he stepped forward, glancing from Hermione to Remus and Samuel, smiling at the vision of the man gently rocking the infant.  
  
Hermione greeted him with a surprised smile, "Not at all, Professor Dumbledore," as she reached for her dressing gown.  
  
"No need to get up, Miss Granger. Please, finish your breakfast. I'd like to speak to you when you're done. In the meantime, Remus, can I have a word with you in private?"  
  
Carrying Samuel, Remus led Albus to the living room. Sitting in one of the two chairs in front of the fireplace, as Remus settled onto the sofa with Samuel, the Headmaster began to tell Remus of the possible solution that he had discussed with Severus the previous evening.  
  
Remus grinned, "It's perfect, Albus! I only hope that she doesn't let what happened with Severus last evening stand in her way."  
  
"Stand in the way of what?" Hermione asked as she entered the room. She took Samuel from Remus, cradling him in her arms as she rocked back and forth on her feet.  
  
Albus rose to his feet with a gentle smile on his face, beckoning her to take a seat before he began.  
  
"How are you feeling today, Hermione?" he asked gently.  
  
"A bit better, now that I've had some sleep and a solid meal," she replied with a sheepish grin.  
  
"Wonderful! Very well then, I'll just get to the reason I am here," Albus began.  
  
"Hermione," he looked at her seriously, "do you truly want to go to your mother's?"  
  
"Professor Dumbledore, I think that I may have no choice but to go," she replied.  
  
"I see. But, what I'm asking is," his vivid blue eyes met with hers, "do you WANT to go?"  
  
Hermione looked confused for a moment. Why was he asking her this?  
  
She didn't respond until after she had thought about it for a few moments. Did she want to go? Living with her mother was the most obvious solution, and would surely be comfortable for her, yet she didn't want to leave the world that she had grown to love over the years. Nearly half her life she had spent here.   
  
Could she leave? Yes, she could very easily make a life in London with her mother and her son, and it would open up opportunities that she had given up hope for.  
  
But did she want to? She frowned and replied, "Whether I want to or not, I really don't see any other way..."  
  
Albus shook his head as he smiled knowingly, "But there is another way, Hermione."  
  
Hermione's eyes darted to Remus, and upon seeing his encouraging smile she asked, "What are you two up to?"  
  
They laughed before Albus responded.  
  
"Hermione, if you will please recall what we discussed in my office after graduation last year," the Headmaster began.  
  
Hermione frowned in confusion, "Professor Dumbledore, I thought I made it clear that I couldn't accept your offer."  
  
"Yes, Hermione. You did. However, the offer still stands," Albus continued.  
  
"But..."  
  
Albus held up a hand, "Please, let me finish," he said firmly.  
  
Hermione blushed, "Sorry, Professor," she apologized.  
  
"Not at all, Hermione. Just hear me out," Albus smiled in return, "Now, I discussed it last evening with both Minerva and Severus, and this morning with Remus. Hermione, though you declined our offer last year, I had the notion that you really wanted to accept, and that it was your circumstances which prevented you from doing so. If you are indeed interested in accepting an apprenticeship, it may just solve some of your problems. Namely, having somewhere to live and somebody to help you with your son so you can, if you wish, continue your eductaion."  
  
"How do you mean?"  
  
"If you would accept, you would be provided with your own quarters at Hogwarts," Albus assured her, "Remus and Severus would be nearby to help you with Samuel, and, I'm sure, Minerva would be pleased to lend a hand as well. Furthermore, an apprenticeship would earn you credits towards further education, if you wish to attend the University in the future."  
  
"So you see, Hermione," Remus spoke up with a smile, "If you decide to do this, it could resolve so many of your problems."  
  
"Yes, it would, but..." she paused and whispered, "Severus."  
  
"Would living so close to him be a problem for you, Hermione?" Remus asked.  
  
"I don't know, Remus. Every time we seem to be working things out, something goes wrong. I don't even know if he would want anything to do with me after last night. What he must think of me..." she broke off and looked away, embarrassed as she recalled the state that Severus had discovered her in, not only physically, but emotionally as well.  
  
"I assure you, Hermione, Severus doesn't think any less of you. His life has been turned upside down as well, and I believe he's just beginning to feel the pressure of trying to deal with the transition from father back to teacher. Being away from his son has been harder on him than I think either of you may realize, and I'm afraid that he may have taken his frustration out on you," Albus tried to explain.  
  
"I drove him to it," Hermione muttered under her breath.  
  
"You don't have to make your decision today, Hermione," Remus interjected, not hearing what she had said, "Just promise that you will take Albus's offer into consideration."  
  
"I will," she whispered.  
  
"Well then," Albus clapped his hands together as he rose to his feet, "I must be getting back. Is there anything you need, Hermione?"  
  
"No, Thank you Professor," she paused for a moment before adding, "but if you see Severus... well, tell him Thank You."  
  
Albus smiled at her with a twinkle in his eye as he nodded and bid Hermione and Remus goodbye.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was greatful for Remus' presence that morning, as she could think more clearly when she was not overwhelmed by Samuel's demands. And Merlin, did she have a lot of thinking to do!  
  
Of all places, muggle or magical, that she had ever been to in her life, Hogwarts was her favorite place in the world. She loved it so much that she had even spent the last few weeks before her graduation thinking about coming back to teach one day. As she had told Professor McGonagall at the Christmas Feast, the offer of an apprenticeship was like a dream come true, as coming back to Howarts would feel like she was coming home.  
  
Subconsciously, it was the probably the reason she had chosen this cottage on the outskirts of Hogsmeade. It was secluded enough that she could keep out of the public eye, yet it was close to the place that she held so dear to her heart, giving her a sense of security that she would not have been able to find elsewhere.  
  
She wanted to go back to stay. That, she knew for sure. But could she?  
  
The only thing holding her back was also one of the reasons she wanted to stay. The deciding factor in the choice she had to make would be Severus Snape.  
  
"Remus," she finally spoke quietly, "I need to get to Hogwarts."  
  
*****  
  
Severus was not aware that he had missed Albus' return. As he stormed out through the side passage of the Great Hall earlier, he hadn't seen the Headmaster enter the room through the main entrance.  
  
Just as the frigid air was forcing him to give up on waiting for Albus, he saw two cloaked figures trudging through the knee deep snow across the school grounds. His brow furrowed in concern when he realized that it was Remus and Hermione. Why were they bringing Samuel out in this weather? Had something happened?  
  
He fought back the urge to rush to them and check on his son, deciding to wait at the entrance for them. As they approached, he couldn't hold back any longer. He stepped forwards to take his son into his arms while Remus assisted Hermione into the castle.  
  
"What do you mean by bringing Samuel out in this weather?" he snapped at Hermione.  
  
Taken aback, Hermione opened her mouth but no words came out.  
  
Remus interjected, "Step aside, Severus. We need to get these two warmed up," as he ushered Hermione into the entrance hall.  
  
As he removed the blankets that his son had been swaddled in, he noticed their unnatural warmth. Severus immediately regretted his harsh words. Of course Hermione wouldn't have exposed her son to frigid temperatures without using a warming charm on his blankets. Once again, he marveled at his stupidity as he suddenly recalled her doing the same thing to keep Samuel warm when Severus had escorted them to the castle on Christmas day.  
  
After Remus had helped Hermione with some drying and warming charms on herself, Severus asked in a gentler tone, "What brings you here today?"  
  
Hermione looked up, her face set in determination as she met his black eyes, and responded with a single word.  
  
"You." 


	16. Decisions

Author's Note: I always knew that Snape would return to his old self (maybe not entirely, but enough to show his true character) once classes resumed. I do hope that I've written the transition effectively.  
  
I would also like to take a moment and address one of my latest reviews, as it brought up a very good point about Hermione not telling her mother before Christmas. As far as Hermione not personally taking Samuel to see her mother, he was quite premature and we're talking about winter in London, here... taking him on a journey that soon was not a good idea, IMO. Also, I wanted Christmas to be their first outing, and that's why I brought Elizabeth back into the story at that point. Not to mention that Elizabeth had just finally returned home a few days before Christmas, herself, so she couldn't have come to see her grandson any sooner. However, I did intend to write a segment explaining that Hermione did send word to Elizabeth announcing Samuel's birth. I don't know how I forgot to do that! But, I do intend to go back and edit it in one of these days.  
  
Thank you again to all of you who have read and/or reviewed my story! As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 15 ~ "Decisions"  
  
"Hermione, would you like for me to take Samuel? You can meet me in the staff room when you are finished." Remus smiled as he reached out for the child.  
  
Hermione nodded as she kissed her son on the forehead and placed him into Remus' arms. Severus scowled for a moment, before taking Hermione firmly by the elbow and leading her to his office. Closing the door behind them and placing silencing charms on the room (with the students back, Severus never knew who to expect lurking around the dungeons), he whirled around to face her, his face set in a stony expression.  
  
Severus had started the morning off determined to talk Hermione out of leaving, but now that she was here he didn't know what to say to her. He wanted her to stay, but he certainly wasn't about to beg. Not only that, but he knew that it had to be her decision. His mind made up not to push her into anything, Severus steeled himself for the confrontation that he knew was coming.  
  
"Severus," Hermione began hesitantly.  
  
"Yes, Miss Granger?" Severus tried to keep emotion out of his voice as he responded in a monotone.  
  
"So, we're back to 'Miss Granger' again, are we?" Hermione asked, trying to hide the annoyance in her voice, "Severus, please. Enough is enough. We need to talk about this... about us."  
  
"Us?" he sneered at the young woman.  
  
"Yes. Us!" she retorted sharply, "You, me, and Samuel. You remember, your son?" she lashed out sarcastically.  
  
"My son," he scoffed, "Yes, of course I remember my son. But will my son remember his father after you take him away?" his eyes flashed angrily as he turned away.  
  
"I'm not going, Severus," her voice quivered just a bit as she approached him, "It would not be fair to you. I'm staying, unless you have any objections."  
  
Severus scoffed, "As you proved to me last night, Miss Granger, you couldn't care less about my opinions. You will do as you please, I'm sure."  
  
Hermione had walked into the school that day determined not to let him wear her down. Holding her head high, her face once again set in determination, she stood face to face with him, "If I didn't care, Severus, I would not be here today! I would be back at the cottage packing for London!"  
  
"Why aren't you?" he hissed at her, "Why aren't you packing? Don't toy with me, Hermione! Last night you had made up your mind. So tell me, WHY are you still here?" he spat.  
  
"Because of you. Because of our son. I have seen you together, Severus. I can not and will not keep my son away from his father," she paused and added quietly, as she looked down at the floor, "unless his father does not want us here.  
  
Severus tried to keep his breathing even as he fought to control his emotions. He wanted to scream... YES! He wanted her her here... he wanted his son here! But he knew that it had to be her decision, not his. He would not allow himself to influence her one way or another.  
  
"I want you to be sure, Hermione," he sighed, "don't stay for my sake alone. If you are unhappy, you will only resent me for it later."  
  
"I could never resent you, Severus. Unless you turn us away..." she looked up at him, as he read the question in her eyes.  
  
"Do you... want to stay?" he asked hesitantly.  
  
"Yes! More than anything," she gushed excitedly, "London hasn't been my home in nearly eight years, Severus. Hogwarts is my home. THIS is where I belong. But I will not stay where I am not wanted."  
  
He inhaled sharply, closing his eyes as he muttered incoherantly, "You ARE wanted."  
  
Hermione stepped closer, "What did you say?"  
  
He opened his eyes and looked at her, sighing, "It is not up to me, Hermione... but, yes, I do want you to stay."  
  
"Good," she smiled, "because I'm not going anywhere."  
  
*****  
  
Remus was sitting on the sofa in the staff room, grinning at the women who were taking turns holding Samuel and fussing over every inch of him.  
  
"He certainly does look like Severus."  
  
"Those eyes!"  
  
"Oh my! The poor dear has inherited the Snape nose."  
  
"Well, hopefully he'll have his mother's personality to make up for it."  
  
"For Hermione's sake, I certainly hope so!"  
  
"Is that so?" a deep voice snarled from behind them.   
  
Minerva and Poppy sniggered as they turned to face Severus and Hermione, who had just entered the room. Hermione was trying to surpress a giggle, but couldn't hide her amused smile when she overheard their comments, while Severus stood there scowling.  
  
"Oh, stop scowling, Severus," Minerva chastised as she handed the baby back to Remus, "that is exactly what we were referring to. You need to lighten up!"  
  
"You're one to talk, Minerva," Severus jibed, fighting to surpress a smile as he tried to keep the look of disapproval on his face, "I believe that you are the only one who's scowl frightens the students nearly as much as mine," he quirked an eyebrow, "maybe even more so."  
  
"Oh, stop making me blush, Severus. Nobody has a scowl as becoming as yours, my dear."  
  
"Yes... it makes me so very loveable, doesn't it?" he couldn't keep the corners of his mouth from twitching upwards, and Minerva stopped to kiss him on the cheek as she and Poppy prepared to leave.  
  
"You are the most loveable git that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, Severus," she smiled at him as she opened the door.  
  
Poppy Pomfrey paused for a moment, squeezing Hermione's arm as she said, "You should bring Samuel up to the infirmary for a check, Hermione. If you have time while you're here today..."  
  
Hermione smiled, "I'll be there," she replied as Poppy walked out the door behind Minerva, "I'm not going anywhere," she sighed after they closed the door behind them.  
  
Remus rose out of his seat, carrying Samuel across the room to Hermione and Severus. It was Severus who reached out and took his son from Remus' arms. "Thank you, Remus," Severus nodded, though he couldn't quite hide his annoyance at Remus' presence.  
  
Remus cleared his throat, "I take it you're staying, then?" he asked Hermione.  
  
She grinned widely and stepped forward to give Remus a hug, "You better believe it!"  
  
"That, my dear, is the best news I've heard all week," the Headmaster's voice piped in from behind them.  
  
Hermione whirled around and took a few steps towards him, "You always seem to pop up at just the right moment," she laughed as she reached out and hugged him, "Thank you... for everything."  
  
Albus smiled, "Very well, then. I think we need to sit down and discuss the arrangements that need to be made."  
  
"I have to be going," Remus spoke up, "I have a... prior commitment. I don't want El..." he stammered for a moment, "er... anyone to wonder if something has happened to me."  
  
After Remus left, Hermione furrowed her brow as she asked, "I wonder what he's up to? He always seems to be rushing out on me these days."  
  
"Indeed? I hadn't noticed," Severus smirked as he quirked an eyebrow.  
  
Albus flashed a knowing smile at Hermione, "Whatever it is, it must be very important to Remus."  
  
*****  
  
The three of them resumed their talk when they reached the Headmaster's office a few minutes later.  
  
"Tell me, Hermione, which professor have you decided to work with?" Albus asked.  
  
"Oh," Hermione paused, "As much as I've been thinking about this, I really never did decide."  
  
"I see. Well, if you'd like to sleep on it..."  
  
"No, Professor Dumbledore. I'd like to make my decision today. I've been thinking about Arithmancy, but... well, it's just that it's the middle of the school year, and we're already a week into the new term. An apprenticeship with Professor Vector is not something I would want to be crammed into less than half of a year."  
  
"Very well, Hermione. What about Charms or Transfiguration? You certainly have extensive knowledge in those areas as well. Above and beyond what you would have needed to know to begin your apprenticeship. You may very well be able to complete your work in either of those subjects in the time allotted."  
  
"Or Potions," Severus interrupted.  
  
Hermione whirled around to face him, "Potions? I wouldn't feel any better about that than Arithmancy! It's too..."  
  
"Hermione, when I used to call you an insufferable little know-it-all, what do you think I meant by that?"  
  
Hermione's face turned red as she began to fume, "I don't think I need you to remind me how much you hated me in school."  
  
Severus shrugged his shoulders and smirked as he replied, "For the most part, I have changed my mind about the "insufferable" bit, but "know-it-all" still applies," he held up a hand to Hermione as she opened her mouth to reply, "Hermione! Let me finish! You are one of the most brilliant minds I have ever had the pleasure... YES, pleasure!" he repeated as Hermione looked at him in astonishment, before he continued, "of teaching. You were one of the few who was not only competent enough to brew a potion without exploding my classroom, but also managed to turn in a correctly brewed... or rather, a perfectly brewed potion nearly every time."  
  
"You are likely the only promising Potion's student that I have had in all my years of teaching. I would hate to see that talent go to waste. So, if I called you a "know-it-all" a few too many times, please know that it was... masking a compliment."  
  
By the time he had finished speaking, Hermione's jaw was nearly on the floor. She didn't know what to say. Potions would not have been her first choice, but that was simply because Severus had always managed to make her feel incompetent, no matter how well she did in his classes.  
  
Hermione was still flustered as she tried to speak, "But still... it's only half a year..."  
  
It was Albus who spoke up next, "You can continue through the summer. I assume you won't be going anywhere by then?"  
  
Hermione hadn't thought about the summer. But yes, she had assumed that she would be staying at Hogwarts indefinitely, so it did make sense that Severus could tutor her through the summer holidays. She looked at Severus, who nodded in approval.  
  
"If potions does not appeal to you," Albus continued, "You could take on a second apprenticeship in Arithmancy starting with the next school year."  
  
"Let me think about it, Professor Dumbledore. I will give you an answer in the morning."  
  
"Very well, Hermione," Albus smiled and nodded at her, "Now, we should discuss your living arrangements. Do you have any objections to taking private quarters in the dungeons?"  
  
"Not at all, unless..." Hermione looked at Severus, "Is it alright with you, Severus?"  
  
Severus looked thoughtful as he replied, "That would probably be the most sensible arrangement, Albus." He turned to Hermione, "It would give you easy access to the lab, keeping you in close proximity to Samuel when you're working... that is, if you choose to work in Potions."  
  
"Furthermore," Albus interrupted, "The quarters that I have in mind consist of two rooms that happen to be located next to Severus' own quarters."  
  
"I know the ones you mean, Albus," Severus replied, "I have no objection to Hermione's use of those quarters. And personally, would be happy to have my son living in the same wing of the castle as myself."  
  
"We can do better than that, Severus," Albus twinkled, "We could adjoin your quarters to Samuel's room, which is also adjoined to the room that would be Hermione's. The accessibility between his room and yours would allow you to easily visit your son any time that you wish to see him."  
  
Severus and Hermione looked at each other for a moment and Severus briefly nodded his head before Hermione turned back to the Headmaster and replied softly, "That sounds... perfect." 


	17. Coming Home

Author's Note: Warning... this chapter is almost pure fluff from beginning to end. I do hope that the near-absence of angst in this chapter is not to disappointing... never fear, Snarky Snape will make another appearance again soon.  
  
Thank you again to all of you who have read and/or reviewed my story! As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 16 ~ "Coming Home"  
  
Hermione made her way to the hospital wing alone with Samuel, as Albus and Severus had called the rest of the staff for a meeting to inform the other professors of Hermione's decision to stay at Hogwarts.  
  
Madame Pomfrey once again made quite a fuss over Samuel as she examined him.  
  
She proclaimed him to be in perfect health as she praised Hermione, "He's growing so quickly, Hermione! You're obviously doing something right."  
  
"Then why do I feel like I'm doing everything wrong," Hermione frowned.  
  
Poppy raised an eyebrow, and Hermione began to explain, "Samuel hardly sleeps, and he cries all the time now, and nothing I do for him seems to be enough. Yet, when Severus was visiting last evening, all he had to do was pick him up, and Samuel went right to sleep!"  
  
"And through the night, and this afternoon, Remus was around to help, and Samuel hardly cried at all! Why? Why am I not good enough for him anymore?"  
  
"Hermione, you look exhausted. Have you been taking care of yourself?" Poppy frowned.  
  
"I don't have time for myself!" Hermione cried.  
  
"I'm afraid that's the problem. If you aren't taking care of yourself..." she broke off as Hermione interrupted.  
  
"How can I when he is constantly demanding my attention?"  
  
"You have to make time," Poppy shook her head and continued softly, "Hermione, babies are very perceptive of feelings, and I'm afraid that Samuel is picking up on your emotions. If you're tense, he senses that, and it's not doing him any good."  
  
"But..."   
  
"No buts, Hermione! Merlin, child! It won't hurt you to let him cry for five minutes while you grab a bite to eat, or take a shower. Nap when he naps, and when his colic gets to be too much for you, you need to give yourself a timeout! If you don't allow yourself to get some rest, you won't be doing Samuel any favors!"  
  
Realizing that she could not win an argument with Madame Pomfrey, Hermione sighed in resignation, "I'll try."  
  
"Good. Now, when things start to become overwhelming, don't be afraid to ask for help," Poppy patted her on the shoulder, "I'm afraid that you've got a bit of the "baby blues", and it could very well turn into a full blown bout of depression if you're not careful," she chastised.  
  
Hermione nodded, and Poppy flashed her a reassuring smile, "Now, why don't you lie down here and get some rest. I'll watch your son until Severus comes to fetch you."  
  
Poppy ushered Hermione into a bed at the end of the room and pulled the curtains closed around her. Within minutes, Hermione had fallen into a deep sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Severus entered the infirmary nearly an hour later and found Madame Pomfrey sitting with Samuel asleep in her arms.  
  
"Where's..." Poppy shushed him before he could finish his question, and pointed to the closed curtains that were pulled around a bed at the end of the room.  
  
"She's getting some much needed rest," she whispered.  
  
Severus took the empty seat next to Poppy and replied with a sigh, "It's about time."  
  
"Severus, has Hermione decided to stay?" Poppy asked.  
  
Severus nodded, "Indeed, she has. She will be taking the quarters next to mine. Albus is making the arrangements as we speak."  
  
"I'm glad... for both of you," Poppy smiled, "Severus, please make sure that Hermione takes care of herself! I have just had a long talk with her about it, but I know how stubbornly independant the girl can be."  
  
"That, she is," Severus smirked, "but I will do what I can to see that she follows your advice. I tried to tell her the same, but she may take it into consideration a bit more seriously coming from you."  
  
"Everything will be fine, Severus. I'm sure, now that you will be available to help with Samuel."  
  
Severus didn't reply, but couldn't hide the smile that was tugging at the corner of his mouth as he looked over at his son. Just then, the curtains around Hermione's bed parted, and she came out, rubbing her eyes wearily.  
  
"How long have I been asleep?" she asked, her eyes darting to Samuel, full of concern.  
  
"Just about an hour, dear," Poppy replied, continuing as she saw the look of concern on Hermione's face, "and don't go feeling guilty about it, either!" she chastised. "Your son is in capable hands."  
  
Hermione averted her eyes as she blushed at this, missing Severus' smirk at the hand that Poppy had taken with Hermione.  
  
"Hermione, I believe that your quarters should be ready by now," he told her as he rose from his chair and relieved Poppy of his son.  
  
"So soon? Oh! I need to get back to the cottage and pack!" Hermione began to fret.  
  
"Not tonight, Hermione. You heard what Madame Pomfrey told you, you need to take it easy. Your basic needs will be taken care of until we can send for your personal effects. Now, if you will please follow me," Severus gestured with one hand as he headed towards the door.  
  
*****  
  
As Severus escorted Hermione and Samuel to the dungeons, Hermione suddenly started feeling nervous, wondering how her new living arrangements would work out for all three of them. Would Severus soon tire of her presence? Would he really want to spend his days working with her, if he had to also spend his evenings living next door to her? She hoped that Severus could not hear her heart thumping as it tried to burst out of her chest.  
  
As they reached the door to her quarters, she finally looked up at him and smiled nervously. He returned the smile, and swept the door open in front of her, gesturing for her to enter ahead of him.  
  
When she walked into the room, she gasped in surprise. Wide eyed, she took in her new surroundings. Directly in front of her was a splendid stone fireplace surrounded by bookshelves. Off to either side, in front of the shelves, sat two wingback chairs, and facing the fireplace was a soft leather sofa, a long narrow table situated behind it. She looked to the left to see a magnificent oak four-poster bed, draped with curtains of crimson toile shot with gold silk, and a shimmering coverlet of the same colors. The bedding looked so luxuriously soft and inviting that Hermione could hardly hold herself back from curling up on the bed right then and there. On the left side of the bed were an oak dressing table and wardrobe, and to the right side she saw a coordinating rocking chair and cradle. Behind that was the door that she thought might lead to her own bathroom. Severus urged her to look to the other side of the room, where situated in one corner she saw a splendid hand-carved oak desk, beside which was another wingback chair. In the other corner of the room was a small oak breakfast table with two chairs. Near the center of that wall was yet another door, and this one she assumed led to what would be Samuel's room.  
  
The room, being situated in the dungeons, was windowless... but the soft glow eminating from the candles and the roaring fire gave the room a ethereal warmth that she never would have expected from a dungeon room.  
  
"Severus..." she opened her mouth to say something, but couldn't find the words. In response to her reaction, Severus smiled as he took her by the elbow and guided her through the door on the left side of the room, showing her the small, but inviting bathroom, which was furnished with a deep claw-foot bathtub. The bathroom also had a small shower stall, but Hermione barely spared it a glance as she closed her eyes and envisioned herself sinking into that bathtub amid a cloud of luxurious bubbles.  
  
Severus cleared his throat, and Hermione whirled around to find him standing in the doorway with a bemused expression on his face, she flashed an embarassed smile at him as she let him lead her back into the main room, and across to the other door which, as she had guessed earlier, led to Samuel's room.   
  
This room was quite a bit smaller, but nonetheless magnificent. It contained another, smaller fireplace surrounded by shelves, a single plush armchair off to the side in one corner, and a rocking chair in the other. A carved-oak crib was along the wall to the left, and a small sofa on the right. The room was decorated in soft shades of sage green and buttercream, the cribbing of soft cotton. It was exactly the sort of room that Hermione had always dreamed of for her son, but thought she could never give him.  
  
"I do hope the decor is to your liking," spoke a quiet voice behind her. She had never heard Severus speak so softly before.   
  
She whirled around and smiled brilliantly at him, "It's... It's... magnificent! Too much, really," she blushed, "You shouldn't have..."  
  
"Hermione, Samuel is my son. He will want for nothing, so long as I am around to provide for him," Severus shrugged his shoulders as he tried to explain.  
  
"Well, then... I understand, and I do appreciate it, Severus. But, my quarters..." Hermione began, but Severus interrupted.  
  
"Though they have been vacant as long as I can recall, your quarters were already furnished. The room just needed a good thorough cleaning, and some new bedding. The only other things we brought in were the rocking chair and the cradle... and they are the very same ones that you were using in the cottage."  
  
"Mine? But how?"  
  
Severus shrugged again, "It does not matter how, Hermione. Suffice it to say, the Headmaster arranged for them to be delivered. Your clothing and Samuel's have also been brought here, and you can return to pack whatever personal effects that may remain at the cottage later. Next weekend, perhaps."  
  
Severus walked over to another doorway that Hermione hadn't noticed, "This is the entrance to my quarters. If you ever need me, just knock."  
  
Hermione nodded hesitantly, and Severus took her gently by the shoulders and tried to look into her eyes, "When it comes to my son, don't ever hesitate to come to me if you need me. Remember what Madame Pomfrey told you. Please, don't be afraid to ask for help." He gently lifted her chin with the palm of his hand as she tried to look down, "I mean that, Hermione. If you need me... for anything at all... I'm right next door."   
  
"I don't ever again want to find you in the kind of state you were in last night, Hermione," he said softly, but firmly.  
  
She smiled sheepishly and turned her head, looking back towards her own room. Severus could almost read her thoughts. "It's about time you do something nice for yourself, Hermione. If you'd like a bath, I would be glad to put Samuel to bed. Please, take as much time as you need."  
  
"Thank you, Severus," she replied in a whisper before she handed Samuel to him and retreated to her room.  
  
When she reached the bathroom, she closed the door behind her, leaned back against it and smiled.  
  
Living next door to Severus would not be so bad after all. 


	18. If You Need Me

Author's Note: I'm wondering if anyone caught on to some of the subtle clues I have been leaving since early on in this story, about Remus. Well, if not, you will see where I am taking him in this chapter.   
  
big grin I really enjoyed writing the exchange between Remus and Severus in this chapter. I hope you enjoy reading it as well. :D  
  
Thank you again to all of you who have read and/or reviewed my story! As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 17 ~ "If You Need Me"  
  
Hermione emerged from the bath feeling refreshed, as well as relaxed for the first time that day. Though it was still early, she dressed for bed and considered having Severus summon a house elf to bring her dinner. She had long ago come to terms with the fact that the house elves were quite happy with their lot in life, and lived to serve their masters. But even though she had given up her S.P.E.W campaign, she never had been able to bring herself to ask anything of the servants. Nevertheless, she knew that she needed to eat.  
  
Pulling on her dressing gown, she padded over to Samuel's room to find him sound asleep in Severus' arms, and Severus himself nodding off as he rocked with his son. Smiling to herself, she approached him to relieve him of their son. She bent over them and had partially lifted Samuel out of Severus' arms and when she was startled by two deep black eyes suddenly staring at her.  
  
"What time is it?" Severus asked groggily as his eyes darted to the clock on the mantle.  
  
"It's still early, yet. Though, we've missed dinner. Would it be OK..." she hesitated for a moment, "Do you think the house elves would mind bringing some food to my room?"  
  
Severus looked back at her, pleasantly surprised. This was the first time that she had given in and asked for help. Maybe she was actually going to follow Madame Pomfrey's advice, after all. He nodded to her, "Yes. Of course."  
  
He stood as he continued, "I have to start my evening rounds, but I will see that a meal is brought to you," he gave her a stern look, "and you make sure you eat every bite."  
  
Hermione was taken aback for a moment, surprised at his tone as he ordered her to eat. Then she heard Madame Pomfrey's voice echoing in her mind, telling her to take care of herself. She sighed and nodded her head, "Don't worry Severus, I will."  
  
Only a short time later, her small table was laden with enough food to feed her for the rest of the weekend. She groaned... if Severus expected her to eat all of this, he was sorely mistaken. She managed to nearly finish a piece of chicken and some steamed vegetables before Samuel woke up. Again remembering Madame Pomfrey's words, she took a few minutes to finish her meal before going to her son. After clearing her plate, she carried her unfinished pumpkin juice with her to Samuel's room, and drank it as she sat in the rocking chair nursing him.  
  
Samuel didn't go back to sleep, yet he did seem much calmer than he had any evening that previous week. Hermione carried him to her room and laid him in the cradle, where he lay cooing to himself as she sat in the rocking chair and began to read a book. It was the first time she had enjoyed the luxury of reading since his birth, and she couldn't believe how much she had missed her books.  
  
Any time Samuel began to fuss, she would gently rock the cradle with her foot, never breaking her concentration from her book until a couple of hours later, when he began to wail furiously. Hermione sighed as she rose out of the chair to pick up her son. She should have known that it was too good to last. She started pacing the room with him as she resigned herself to another sleepless night.  
  
*****  
  
As Severus made his rounds that night, he couldn't keep his mind off the woman and the child that were now situated in their own quarters in the dugeons, in rooms right next to his own. He paced the school's corridors, surprised at the lack of errant students that evening. He almost wished he had found students snogging in an empty classroom or sneaking around playing late night pranks. He needed something to pass the time. He shook his head as he thought to himself that he almost missed the Weasley twins' antics at times like this.   
  
He checked in on his Slytherins before making one last round and returning to his quarters. As he finished his final sweep of the upper floors, and was headed for the dungeons, he encountered Remus Lupin returning from wherever it was that he had been that day.  
  
"Good evening, Severus," Remus smiled, with a glint in his eye, "Are Hermione and Sameul all settled in?"  
  
"Yes, indeed, Lupin," Severus paused, smirking as he raised an eyebrow and asked in an innocent voice, "Tell me, Remus, how is Dr. Granger this evening?"  
  
Remus tried to hide his surprise, looking deep in thought as he tried to find the words to reply. Suddenly, he sighed in defeat, "How did you know who I was with tonight, Severus?"  
  
"Do you think I missed your little slip of the tongue this afternoon? And all this time, Hermione's been wondering why you keep rushing off. I wonder what she would think if she knew that you were... courting her mother?" Severus smirked.  
  
"I would hardly call it 'courting', Severus," Remus replied, shaking his head.  
  
"Oh really? Well then, tell me Lupin, what would you call it?"  
  
Remus sighed, "If you must know, Elizabeth has invited me for tea a few times, and tonight I returned the favor by taking her to dinner. We both have mutual interests... namely, Hermione and Samuel. It's nothing more than that, Snape."  
  
Severus raised a curious eyebrow as he asked, "Then why so secretive, Lupin? Surely, Hermione wouldn't object to her mother and her... friend... sharing a cup of tea now and then."  
  
"Stay out of it, Snape!" Remus sighed.  
  
Severus couldn't help himself. Even though, for the most part, the two men had made peace long ago, he had spent far too many years feeling irked by the werewolf's presence to let an opportunity like this pass. "Perhaps..."  
  
"Perhaps WHAT?" Remus snapped.  
  
"Perhaps I will 'stay out of it' if you tell me what is really going on with you and Dr. Granger," Severus shrugged his shoulders innocently, raising his hands in a curious gesture.  
  
Remus groaned, "Look, Snape... I admit, Elizabeth is an attractive, intelligent woman who I enjoy spending time with. However," he paused and sighed, "I am being honest when I say, we're just two like-minded people enjoying each other's company."  
  
"Are you sure that's ALL you're enjoying?" Severus smirked again.  
  
"Yes! That's all!" Remus was becoming thoroughly agitated now.  
  
"I see..."  
  
"No Snape, I don't think you do. Look, Elizabeth lost her husband less than a year ago, and I'm not about to try to fill his shoes when she's not ready to move on!"  
  
"Ah... so then, when she IS ready to move on, will you..." Severus didn't get to finish before Remus shot him a disgusted look and stalked away.  
  
Severus smiled in satisfaction and couldn't surpress a chuckle as he made his way back to his quarters... It wasn't easy to get the best of Remus Lupin. This hadn't turned out to be such a boring evening after all.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was beginning her third hour of pacing her quarters, trying to get Samuel back to sleep, when she heard a voice from behind her.  
  
"What do you think you are doing?" Severus asked as he approached her.  
  
Startled, Hermione quickly turned to see Severus leaning against the doorway, his brow furrowed as he crossed his arms. He must have been getting ready to turn in for the night, as he was dressed in black nightclothes and a robe.  
  
"Oh! You're back..." Hermione whispered tiredly, "Samuel just does not want to go to sleep."  
  
"I thought I told you to come get me if you need me," Severus responded sharply.  
  
"You were making your rounds..." Hermione tried to explain.  
  
"Have you tried knocking on my door?" Severus snapped quietly at her as Hermione shook her head, "I thought not. I've been back for nearly an hour. If I hadn't checked Samuel's room before going to bed, I never would have heard him crying in here!"  
  
"Do you think me incapable of caring for my son?" Hermione questioned indignantly.  
  
"Not at all, Miss Granger. I just don't understand why you are incapable of asking for help when you so obviously need it. What, exactly, are you trying to prove?" Severus continued in a firm, yet soft voice, "Why, Hermione? Why do you insist on doing this to yourself? You have nothing to prove! Asking for help is not a sign of incompetence!"  
  
Hermione sighed, "I'm sorry, Severus. I just didn't want to disturb you. I know it's been a long day... you had rounds tonight, and I figured you would be too tired to bother."  
  
"So you would rather work yourself into exhaustion again rather than 'bother' me?" Severus shook his head, "Nothing to do with my son would ever be a bother, Hermione. Now, why don't you let me take the next shift with Samuel, and you get some sleep."  
  
"Will you... stay with me?" Hermione asked as she looked down at Samuel.  
  
When Severus looked at her in surprise, she explained, "Just until you get him to sleep. I've never slept apart from him before..."  
  
"So, that's it?" Severus sighed. "If it will make you feel better, I will bring him back here when he's asleep, and put him in the cradle by your bed."  
  
"Thank you, Severus," Hermione yawned.  
  
"Not at all, Hermione. Now get yourself into bed", he urged her.  
  
Hermione sighed and nodded her head as she laid back onto the pillow and closed her eyes.  
  
When she woke a few hours later, Samuel was not in his cradle as Severus had promised. She entered the nursery to check on them, and found Severus sitting on the sofa, sound asleep with Samuel cradled in his arms. She softly approached them, easing herself onto the sofa beside them. Reaching over to caress her son's head, she decided not to risk waking either of them by taking Samuel back to her room. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes, instantly drifting back into a deep slumber.  
  
*****  
  
Severus stirred a short time later, feeling a warm weight resting on his shoulder. Something was tickling his nose as he breathed. Barely awake, he cracked open one eye and looked down to see a head of curly chestnut hair leaning against him, a soft warm body pressed close to his side. He sighed as he closed his eyes and went back to sleep with a soft smile on his face. 


	19. Starting Over Again

Author's Note:   
  
Thank you again to all of you who have read and/or reviewed my story! As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 18 ~ Starting Over Again  
  
Severus was the first to wake the following morning. He looked down at his son and smiled when he saw Samuel staring back at him in wide-eyed curiosity. A slight movement against his arm reminded him of the woman who was sleeping beside him. Being that it was a Sunday, Severus had nowhere urgent to be that early in the morning, so he allowed himself to sit there on the sofa, holding Samuel while Hermione continued to sleep. Just as Samuel began to fuss a few minutes later, Severus felt the warm weight lifting from his shoulder, Hermione's soft curls once again tickling his nose as she raised her head. He inhaled deeply as he reached up to brush the hair away from his face, and couldn't help but notice the fresh melon scent of her shampoo.   
  
He smirked tiredly at Hermione as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, "Sleep well?" he whispered hoarsely.  
  
Hermione looked up at him with a sheepish grin and muttered, "Sorry."  
  
"Mmm.." he grunted in reply as he placed Samuel in Hermione's arms.  
  
He stood up and tried to surpress a yawn as he began to walk towards the door to his own room. "Will you be coming to breakfast this morning? Or shall I have something brought in for you again?" he asked as he paused near the door.  
  
Hermione sighed, looking up at him she replied, "I suppose I should go up for breakfast. The sooner I start spending time among the rest of the Hogwarts population, the better."  
  
Severus nodded, "When you're finished feeding Samuel, come and get me. I'll watch him while you get yourself ready."  
  
Severus returned to his quarters, and quickly dressed for breakfast. Just as he finished buttoning up his frock coat, there was a light knock on his door. "Enter," he replied.  
  
The door opened, and Hermione paused hesitantly in the doorway. Severus raised an eyebrow as he said, "Well? Are you coming in?"  
  
"Samuel has fallen asleep. I've put him in the crib in his room," she replied quietly.  
  
"Very well," he replied before he shooed her out of the room, "Go, get ready for breakfast. Leave the door open behind you and I'll listen in case he wakes up."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione had only been in Severus' quarters one other time... and on that day, he had kissed her. She paused in the doorway, trying not to blush as she remembered that day.   
  
"Well, are you coming in?" Severus' voice jolted her back to the present. She informed him that Samuel was asleep in his room before Severus urged her to go get ready for breakfast. Leaving the door open behind her, she returned to her own quarters to dress for her first meal in the Great Hall.   
  
She hurriedly dressed and began to walk back to Severus' quarters. Before she could get that far, she ran into Severus in Samuel's room. He was leaning over the crib, speaking softly to his son. She approached the crib, standing so close to Severus that her arm brushed his. As she leaned over the crib next to him, she smiled at the way Samuel was gazing at his father.  
  
"He seems quite content to be here with you, you know?" she whispered.  
  
Severus turned his head slightly to look at her, a gentle smile on his face.   
  
Severus cleared his throat, "Well then, shall we go?" he asked as he leaned further in and picked up his son.  
  
Hermione sighed, "If we must."  
  
He squeezed her arm in a reassuring gesture, "Everything will be fine, Hermione."  
  
As they walked out through her quarters and into the dungeon corridor, she hoped that he was right.  
  
Hermione was greeted by the friendly smiles of the Hogwarts staff as she and Severus entered the Great Hall through the side corridor near the staff table. Professor Dumbledore must have been expecting her, as there was an extra chair set at the table beside Severus'.   
  
Severus pulled out Hermione's chair for her, and handed Samuel to her after she had taken her seat. As she looked out upon the four long house tables, she met with a sea of curious faces. Apparently, the students were had not been aware of her presence in the castle.  
  
The Headmaster rose from his seat and called the students to attention as he began to speak, "I have an announcement to make."  
  
When the students settled down, he continued, "I would ask you all to extend a warm welcome to Miss Hermione Granger and her son, Samuel." He paused as the students welcomed Hermione and her son with a warm round of applause. Hermione looked towards her old house table, where the Gryffindors (many of whom she remembered from previous years) were applauding heartily. Her nerves finally settled as she met the eyes of her old friend Ginny Weasley, who flashed her a brilliant smile. Hermione sighed, at least she would have one close friend among the students.  
  
She looked up as the Headmaster continued, "Miss Granger and her son will be taking residence in the dungeons, as she plans to begin an apprenticeship here at Hogwarts this term. You should treat Miss Granger with the same respect as you would any of your professors," he finished his introduction, smiling at her before sitting back down to begin his meal.  
  
Hermione tried not to blush as she heard the curious murmurs making their way through the Hall. What subject would she be apprenticing in? Why was she living in the dungeons? When did she have a baby? She tried not to look at Severus as she realized that many of them must be wondering who Samuel's father was. Professor Dumbledore was considerate enough to not make that information public as part of his morning announcements, but Hermione knew that it would only be a matter of time before the students began to put two and two together.   
  
Hermione sighed, and looked over towards Remus for reassurance. But he wouldn't meet her eyes. She frowned in concern as she noticed how tired he looked.  
  
Throughout the meal, Hermione continued to try to catch Remus' eye. But he occupied himself talking to Hagrid, who was seated next to him. Hagrid noticed her looking their way, and raised his glass to her, smiling in acknowlegment.  
  
Finally, she leaned in towards Severus and asked, "What is up with him?"  
  
"Up with whom, Hermione?" he replied, quirking an eyebrow.  
  
"Remus!" she hissed, "He won't even look at me this morning," she frowned in disappointment.  
  
"Indeed? I hadn't noticed. Yes... now that you mention it, he does seem a bit... preoccupied," he shrugged as he continued, "Perhaps it's the moon."  
  
"Oh! Of course! He never feels well at that time of the month," she replied, with a pang of concern for her friend. She knew how hard his transformations were for him, even with the Wolfsbane. Then an idea struck her.  
  
"Severus... if I do choose to continue my studies in Potions, would you teach me how to make the Wolfsbane potion? I would love to be able to do something for Remus, in return for all that he has done for me."  
  
"Perhaps," was Severus reply, as he tried not to let Hermione see the satisfied smirk on his face.  
  
*****  
  
The rest of the day flew by for both Hermione and Severus.   
  
Hermione had another meeting with Professor Dumbledore to inform him of her decision. She would, indeed, take the apprenticeship in Potions. It wasn't the idea of learning to make the Wolfsbane for Remus that had been the deciding factor. No, that was just a bonus. She had made her decision while pacing her room with Samuel during the late hours of the previous evening. Trying to keep her mind off of her crying son, she had mentally gone over and over her options.  
  
In the end, she supposed that it was Severus' speech to her in the Headmaster's office, revealing to her that he did indeed think enough of her abilities to take her on as an apprentice, that was the deciding factor. Secretly, she did enjoy potion making, and his approval of her abilities was the highest compliment that she could have ever received. After all, Severus Snape approved of very few, if any, students that she had been aware of.  
  
And Severus meant every word that he had said to her the previous day. Teaching her was a pleasure, though during Hermione's school days he could never have let her know that. As a spy, he couldn't let on that anybody besides his precious Slytherins held favor in his class. If he regretted his treatment of any student over the years, it had been Hermione Granger. By the time she graduated, Severus had been afraid that he may have stifled any interest that his most brilliant student may have had in Potions.   
  
Severus was pleased that she had made her decision to continue her studies with him this term, though he tried not to let it show. He didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea about why he had made the offer to Hermione, and he only hoped that she had accepted for the right reasons. Only time would tell.  
  
*****  
  
After dinner that evening, Hermione was surprised by a visit from Ginny Weasley. The two girls shared a cup of tea and spent a couple of hours catching up. Apparently, Ron had informed the rest of the Weasley clan that Severus was Samuel's father.  
  
"I wish I could have seen the looks on the twins' faces!" Ginny laughed, "But they are happy for you, really... we all are," she smiled at Hermione as she reached across the table to squeeze her hand.  
  
"Does he treat you well, Hermione?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Severus? Oh, yes. For the most part, anyway. We have our differences, but he has been a wonderful father," Hermione smiled.  
  
"Who would have ever thought? Imagine... Severus Snape, a father!" Ginny giggled, as she feigned a shudder at the thought.  
  
"Yes, quite the frightening image, is it not?" the silky voice behind them made Ginny jump. Hermione laughed, "Severus!" she exclaimed in indignation "Are you eavesdropping?"  
  
"Not at all, Hermione. I was just coming in to check on my son. I can not help what I overhear when you are foolish enough to leave the door open," he replied as he scowled at Ginny.  
  
Ginny hurriedly excused herself, promising as she left to help with Samuel any time Hermione needed a hand.  
  
Hermione whirled around, "Really, Severus! Did you have to frighten the poor girl? I thought your days as a "greasy git" were over!" she chastised.  
  
Severus shrugged, "Old habits are hard to break."  
  
Hermione sighed, "Samuel is asleep. I'm going to go take a long soak in the tub..."  
  
"I will be in my quarters," Severus replied, "I do not have rounds tonight, so I will come by to see if you need anything before I retire for the evening."  
  
*****  
  
Severus walked back through to his own quarters and into his bathroom, where he began to run water for a shower. He turned the tap to make the water as hot as he could, before disrobing and standing beneath the steaming spray. A few minutes later, as he rinsed the shampoo from his hair, he was suddenly reminded of the melon scent he had detected when he had accidentally inhaled Hermione's soft curls earlier that morning, and he began imagining her shampooing those glorious locks.  
  
Suddenly realizing where his thoughts were drifting, he reached to turn the tap colder. "Argh!" he tried to hold back a yelp of surprise as the freezing water rained down on him.   
  
Merlin! What was happening to him! How could one night spent with a soft warm body innocently curled up next to him affect him this way? He reached to turn the water off, lowering his head and taking a deep breath as he pushed the dripping curtain of hair away from his face.  
  
As he dried and dressed for bed, he tried to keep his thoughts off of Hermione. Her scent, her warmth, her softness. It was all he could do to clear those thoughts from his mind as he walked back through Samuel's bedroom and knocked on the door to Hermione's quarters. He stepped through the door when he heard her softly call "Come in", and paused to take a calming breath as he looked at her, dressed in a soft cotton nightgown, reclining on the bed against her soft pillows, nursing her son. Her head was leaning to one side, her long hair spilling over her other shoulder and onto her pillows. Her eyes were partially closed and a she wore a soft smile of contentment on her face as she looked at her son in adoration.   
  
Severus had never seen her look so beautiful.  
  
*****  
  
By the time Hermione returned to her room from her bath, Samuel had awakened. Hermione carried him to her bed, where she curled up on top of the covers and leaned back against her luxurious pillows before situating him in the crook of her arm to nurse him. She closed her eyes as she began to remember the feeling of security that she had woken up to, feeling the strength and warmth of the man she had curled up next to in her sleep. She recalled the musky herbal scent of his hair, as she had inhaled it in her sleep. She had dreamed that night of the tall man with the dark eyes, and the way he looked when he was concentrating on brewing his potions. How had she never before noticed the elegance of those hands, with the long slender fingers, and the way that they so gracefully would move over a simmering cauldron? She was drifting off into dreamland once again, and didn't even realize that she had called "come in" in response to a knock on her bedroom door.  
  
"Ahem," Hermione jolted awake when she heard a familiar clearing of a throat. She opened her eyes to find Severus standing in the doorway, his brow creased over the otherwise soft expression on his face.  
  
"Oh!" she gasped as she came back to her senses, "I must have drifted off..."  
  
As she removed her sleeping son from her breast, she gently slipped out of bed and placed him in his cradle.   
  
Severus cleared his throat once more before he spoke to her, "Well then, I... should be going. If you need anything..." he drifted off.  
  
Hermione smiled, "I know where to find you."  
  
As he walked out of her room, closing the door behind him, Hermione closed her eyes and inhaled deeply.  
  
Merlin! What was happening to her? How could one night spent curled up against his strong warm body affect her like this? She groaned as she rolled onto her stomach and buried her head deep in her pillows, knowing that she was in for another sleepless night.  
  
Only this time, she knew that it would have nothing to do with Samuel.  
  
***** 


	20. Sweet Dreams

Author's Note: I started this story thinking that I would be lucky to write 20 chapters. But, here I am, Chapter 20... and there is so much still to come! So, at this point in my story, I am going to take some time to go back and edit the earlier chapters. There are some minor details that I left out (such as Hermione informing her mother about Samuel's birth) and some typos and grammatical errors that I have caught while re-reading. In the meantime, here's one chapter to tide you over. I was aiming to get her a bit back into character now that she's resuming her studies... so finally, much to my relief, Hermione is moving past her "weepy" stage.  
  
Thank you again to all of you who have read and/or reviewed my story! As always, all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
Chapter 19 ~ Sweet Dreams  
  
After what had to have been the longest week of Hermione's life, Samuel's colic finally abated. He was still staying awake most of the night, but at least he wasn't screaming anymore. Maybe it was due to the change of environment... or maybe it was due to the changes in his mother. Now that Hermione was not feeling quite as overwhelmed anymore, Samuel was not nearly as fussy. Perhaps Madame Pomfrey was right... the baby had been picking up on her stress, making matters much worse than they would have been otherwise.  
  
While Samuel was content to lie in his cradle for longer periods of time, Hermione enjoyed the luxury of lying in her own bed and reaching over to rock the cradle gently whenever he would begin to fuss, only getting up when it was time for his feedings. As a result, she found herself less tense through the night, and more relaxed during the day.  
  
And just in time. She was due to begin her apprenticeship this week. She had been worried that she might have to call the whole thing off, if she couldn't manage to start sleeping regularly.  
  
Rather than beginning her apprenticeship Monday morning, she had taken a few more days to adjust to being back at Hogwarts, while making arrangements for her son to be taken care of during the hours that she would be working with Severus. They had decided to keep their working hours to evenings and weekends, as it would be too hard juggling schedules to work out babysitting duties with those who had volunteered to help. Between Remus Lupin and Ginny Weasley, who had volunteered to alternate turns sitting with Samuel, somebody would always be available to help during the evening hours. And, if all else failed, they had Professor McGonagall and Madame Pomfrey for backup. The two women would have been glad to help out more often, but Minerva had house duties to attend to and Poppy was busy dealing with sick students in the infirmary, as it was the peak of the flu season.  
  
The evening before she was supposed to begin her apprenticeship was the full moon, and Hermione laid awake worrying about Remus. He had looked so tired all weekend, but something in his demeanor told Hermione that it was more than the normal agitation that he felt every month prior to the full moon. He often seemed to get lost in thought, as if he were daydreaming, and when he would finally snap out of it and meet her eyes, the smiles that he flashed at her never reached his eyes. It was as though he was hiding something.  
  
She also spent much time that night thinking of her mother, wondering how she was faring back at home. Hermione could not wait for a break in the weather so she and Samuel could journey to London for a weekend visit. Though she was quite content to live at Hogwarts, she did feel a pang of regret whenever she thought of her mother living all alone. She could easily go by herself for a visit, but was hesitant to leave Samuel for a full day... and she wasn't about to take him out for a trip to London in this weather. She wondered if Remus would be willing to go to London and bring her mother to Hogwarts for another visit. Yes, that seemed like the most obvious solution for now... but would Remus be up for it? She thought again about how preoccupied he seemed these days, and she didn't want to intrude.  
  
She tossed and turned for quite a while longer, eventually getting up to pace the room as she thought about working with Severus tomorrow. Would he revert to treating her as an "insufferable know-it-all" as he had done throughout her school years, or would he treat her more as a colleague? Even more worrisome, would she be able to put their personal life aside and concentrate on their work?   
  
She had continued dreaming of him ever since the other night, when she had fallen asleep next to him on the sofa in Samuel's room. Every time she closed her eyes, she recalled the images of his dark eyes and his elegant hands, and she found herself wondering what else those hands could do.  
  
Hermione groaned. Why was she feeling this way all of a sudden?   
  
On the other hand, maybe it wasn't so sudden. Hermione began to think about the events of the last year, trying to figure out when she had started feeling this way.  
  
Yes, she had wanted him that fateful night in the forest, when they had been as close as two people can be... yet she never fantasized about him like this afterwards. She had been too preoccupied dealing with the repercussions of that evening. Not even after the day that he had recently kissed her and treated her so tenderly had she felt this way. No, those were special moments that she would never forget, but they never led to any feelings such as this. Or did they? Had this been building up for so long, and she was only just now realizing that she might care for him as more than just the father of her child?  
  
Hermione sighed as she admitted to herself that she was, indeed, attracted to Severus... but surely, it was nothing more than that, she tried to convince herself. How could she work side by side with him every day, if she continued to think of him like this at night. She tried to push these thoughts out of her mind as she crawled back into bed and tried once again to go to sleep, unaware that two doors down from her own room, Severus was lying awake having similar thoughts of her.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione needn't have worried. Her first evening working with Severus couldn't have gone better. Rather than a practical lesson, they spent the evening discussing the potions that she should learn during her time studying with him. Discussion eventually turned to the properties of the Wolfsbane potion, and he agreed to teach her how to make it. This she took as another compliment... as it was a difficult potion to brew, and it once again reassured her of his confidence in her abilities.  
  
She returned to her room that evening with a pile of books that he had given her, to refresh her mind of what she had learned the previous seven years. Yawning as she entered, she had nearly forgotten that Ginny was there, babysitting Samuel. She smiled at the youngest Weasley, who was sitting on the sofa with her legs curled up underneath her, Samuel content in her arms.  
  
"Oh! Hermione, you're back!" Ginny smiled at her as she stretched her legs out and shifted Samuel into her other arm, "How did it go?"  
  
"Just fine, thank you," Hermione replied as she approached and reached out to take her son into her arms, "and how did things go in here?"  
  
Ginny giggled, "Wonderful! He's such a little angel... didn't give me one iota of trouble," she grinned as she passed the child to his mother.  
  
As Hermione took Samuel into her own arms, he looked up at her and began to coo. She smiled down at him, "Happy to see me, are you? Yes, I bet you are... it's time for your bedtime snack."  
  
"I'd better be going, I've got to finish my homework," Ginny excused herself.  
  
"Indeed, Miss Weasley. Need I remind you that you have a Potions essay due tomorrow?" Ginny jumped as she heard the voice of her Potions professor behind her.  
  
"Yes, of course, Professor Snape," she replied as she grabbed her bag and scampered out of the room.  
  
"Honestly, Severus! Do you have to keep sneaking up on her like that? She might never help with Samuel again if you continue to her so!"  
  
Severus smirked, "It must be the red hair... I can't resist the temptation to intimidate a Weasley," he shrugged. "Besides, I have a feeling that it would take a lot more than a snarky Potions professor to keep Miss Weasley away from your son. However," he sighed in mock resignation , "I will try to... resist the urge to harass Miss Weasley in the future."  
  
A short while later, after tending to Samuel and tucking him in for the evening, Hermione settled into one of the wingback chairs flanking the fireplace. She plucked a book from the stack of volumes that she had placed next to the chair for some late-night reading. A couple of hours later, as she felt her eyelids growing heavy, she closed the book and rubbed her fist over her tired eyes as she yawned. Severus had just completed his evening rounds, and when Hermione looked up, he was standing in the doorway. He looked tired as he walked over to take a seat in the chair on the other side of the fireplace.  
  
"I'm pleased to see that you are as studious as ever," he began, "but don't you think you should get some sleep?"  
  
"Yes... I was just going to have a cup of tea and try to relax a bit. Tired as I am, I need to unwind before I will be able to fall asleep," she replied, "would you like to join me?" she asked as she rose from her chair and began to boil some water.  
  
Severus nodded, "Tea sounds fine," he replied as he reclined his head against the back of the chair, crossing his legs at the ankles as he extended them in front of him.  
  
"Will we be brewing tomorrow?" Hermione asked excitedly as she returned a few minutes later with two cups of tea.  
  
"Anxious to get started on that Wolfsbane, are you?"  
  
Hermione laughed, "Anxious to get started on whatever you potion you think we should begin with."  
  
He raised an eyebrow, "We'll see..." he said as he took a sip of his tea.  
  
They began discussing different potions and their properties, and before they knew it, an hour had passed. When Hermione couldn't stifle her yawns any longer, Severus excused himself.  
  
"Get some sleep... exhaustion and potions brewing do not mix well. I deal with enough exploding cauldrons with the students during the day..." he sighed.  
  
Hermione laughed, "And I do not wish to suffer the wrath of mean old Professor Snape, do I?"  
  
Severus smirked, "Neither do I wish that upon you," he replied as he walked over to the cradle to bid his son goodnight.  
  
"Goodnight, Severus," she whispered as he walked towards the door.  
  
"Goodnight, Hermione." he replied, once again supressing a smile as he left for the night.  
  
*****  
  
While Hermione had no trouble passing out in exhaustion, Severus was in for another sleepless night.  
  
To sit and discuss the merits of potions brewing with an intellectual equal was... refreshing. Every day, his respect for the young woman was growing. And that wasn't all. She was on his mind constantly. Every time he closed his eyes, he could smell the scent of her hair, remembering how soft her curls were as they had tickled his nose the other morning, and the way she looked as she sat in the glow of the fire, her eyes sparkling with intelligence even as they reflected the dancing flames.  
  
What had this woman done to him, that she had become so deeply ingrained into every corner of his mind? Every time he closed his eyes, he envisioned the way she had looked the other evening, as she lay half asleep on her bed with their son held close to her breast. When he finally fell asleep, he dreamed of laying there next to her, curled into the warmth of her side. It was the first of many nights that he would fall asleep to find himself drifting into this pleasant dream.  
  
*****  
  
The next few weeks went quickly, as Severus and Hermione enjoyed their time working and studying together. They had developed an evening routine of sitting by her fire, continuing their intellectual discussions which mainly focused on her Potions studies. He found that each day passed more quickly as he looked forward to their fireside chats. He was finding it harder and harder to leave each evening, and he knew that he would not sleep easily as he was continually disturbed by images of her the minute he closed his eyes.  
  
For once, Hermione was having an easier time of it. Between her studies and caring for her son, she was thoroughly exhausted by the time he retired to his quarters, and she didn't have the energy to lay awake thinking of him. Yet, he was still on her mind as she dreamed of him almost every night.  
  
As long as they kept busy when they spent time together in the lab, their thoughts of each other did not interfere with their work. Side by side they would work together, studying and brewing. Occasionally, his hand would brush hers as he would lean over her cauldron, showing her the correct method of stirring whatever potion she was brewing. Other times, he would lean over her shoulder from behind her, placing one hand on her back as he pointed out passages of her text books. All in all, it had become a comfortable working relationship, and as they began to enjoy the companionship, they became accustomed to these small touches. Only when they were apart, did either of their thoughts linger on those moments.  
  
*****  
  
Samuel continued to grow and thrive under the loving care of his parents and their friends. He had outgrown the need to be in the cradle by Hermione's side, and had begun sleeping most nights in the crib in his own room. It had been hard at first, but both Hermione and Samuel quickly adjusted to sleeping in separate rooms.  
  
Late one evening in early February, Severus returned from his rounds not to find Hermione sitting by the fire as usual, but pacing her room with Samuel crying in her arms, a concerned look on her face. It had been weeks since she had needed to walk with the baby like this, and Severus' brow furrowed as he walked up behind them. Looking intently over her shoulder, he asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
Hermione's eyes were full of concern, "He's fussing more than usual, and I think he may be running a fever."  
  
Severus placed one arm on her back, as the other reached around so he could place his palm on the child's forehead, "Yes, he does seem quite warm. Shall I fetch Madame Pomfrey?"  
  
"I don't think it's anything serious. If his fever gets any higher, I will take him up to see her in the morning. I just feel so... so helpless. I don't know what to do for him!"  
  
He ordered her to bed, taking Samuel with him back to the nursery and promising to wake her if she was needed.  
  
In the middle of the night, Hermione walked in to check on Samuel, and found Severus hovering over the crib.  
  
"How is he doing?" she fretted.  
  
"He's developed a raspy cough. His fever seems to have gone down, but I suggest you take him to the infirmary in the morning, anyway. If that cough settles in his chest, it could get quite nasty."  
  
Hermione nodded, "Has he been sleeping all this time?"  
  
"Yes. He's been out for quite a while now... it was his coughing that brought me back in here to check on him."  
  
They both, at the same time, reached in to caress their child's warm brow. As their hands touched gently, they looked up at each other, their eyes full of concern for their son.  
  
"He'll be alright, Hermione. Madame Pomfrey will see to that," Severus assured her as he squeezed her hand gently, "I'll stay with him if you want to return to bed."  
  
"I'll never sleep," Hermione whispered, "I'll stay."  
  
"We'll both stay," Severus replied as he led her to the sofa. This time, as she fell asleep beside him, he stayed awake. He couldn't resist reaching over to softly caress her hair. And this time, he didn't need to dream of its fragrance... no, this time, it was real. 


	21. Someone to Watch Over Me

Author's Note: Been busy editing, yet I managed to pound out one more chapter... I had to get the idea out of my head before my muse abandoned me. Enjoy!  
  
Once again, thank you to my reviewers. I only hope that I can live up to your expectations. Thank you also to everybody else who has read my story, especially those of you who are still here :) All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment  
  
*******  
  
Chapter 20 ~ Someone to Watch Over Me  
  
Severus eventually fell asleep that night, only to wake in the morning sensing that something was missing. It was Hermione... she must have gotten up before him, as she was nowhere in sight. With a sigh, he walked over to the crib and saw that Samuel was not in the room either. He began to become concerned when, after receiving no answer to his knock on her door, he entered her room and found them both gone.  
  
He returned to his room and hurriedly dressed. Hermione must have taken Samuel to the infirmary, but why didn't she wake him first? Surely, if it were an emergency, she would not have gone alone, he thought as he tried to assure himself of his son's well being. Nevertheless, there was nothing that would ease his concern until he saw his son with his own eyes.  
  
He swept out of his quarters and through the dungeons, students hurriedly moving out of his way as they could tell by the look on his face and the billow of his robes that he was not in a good mood, trying not to gape at him after he passed as they wondered where he was stalking off to. They had learned long ago to not get in the way of Severus Snape when he was on a mission.  
  
When he entered the infirmary, he breathed a sigh of relief to see Hermione sitting with Madame Pomfrey, having a cup of tea. Still, he was not happy. How could she have worried him so?  
  
As he stormed across the room, his eyes flashing angrily, he tried to keep his voice low as he hissed, "Why did you not wake me, Hermione?"  
  
Hermione smiled nervously as she apologized, "I woke up early and couldn't sleep. Samuel seemed a bit better, but I was still anxious to bring him in for a check. I'm sorry, Severus."  
  
"Hmph..." he growled, "Did you not think that I would worry about my son when I woke up to find you both gone?"  
  
Madame Pomfrey intervened, "Now Severus! Enough of that. Your son is fine. He's got a nasty cold, but I've given him a small dose of Pepper-up Potion. He should be feeling better by the end of the day."  
  
Severus scowled at the nurse, and had to bite his lip not to snap at her. He was in no mood to fight with Poppy. He was tired, he was hungry, and he had been worried about his son. He turned and stormed out of the room to head downstairs for breakfast, leaving the two women gawking in his wake.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione had long ago grown accustomed to Severus' moods, and lately nothing he said phased her much. But this morning, she had been feeling irritable and was fuming by the time he had stalked out of the hospital wing. She decided to have breakfast brought to her room that morning, as she thought it best to take Samuel back to get some sleep. He was indeed looking healthier now that Madame Pomfrey had treated him, and his cough had nearly gone away. Yet he was still a bit tired from his illness the previous night, and Hermione wanted to make sure that he didn't have a relapse, nor did she want to face Severus again that morning.  
  
She spent the rest of the day in her rooms, studying for her session with Severus that evening. For the first time since she began her apprenticeship, she was nervous about working with him. They had developed such a comfortable companionship over the past few weeks, and she didn't want to ruin that.  
  
Severus had apparently calmed down over the course of the day, and when she arrived in the lab he was as cordial as he ever was during their sessions. Yet, it was awkward, Severus keeping his distance as he instructed her, and Hermione was missing the small touches that she had become accustomed to. When Severus didn't come to her rooms for their late evening chat, she found herself unable to sleep. She sat by the fire, studying alone all night. The little sleep she got was very erratic, as she couldn't seem to sleep more than a few minutes at a time.  
  
The following morning, she woke feeling like her head weighed a ton. She tried to brush it off as a result of her lack of sleep, but as the day went on she felt more and more fatigued. As they worked in the lab that evening, she began to feel a bit faint and beads of perspiration were forming on her forehead. Severus arched an eyebrow in concern, "Hermione, are you feeling alright?"  
  
"Hmmm?" she replied distractedly, "No... Just a bit tired," she yawned, "I didn't sleep well last night."  
  
"You're looking pale," Severus approached and tried to brush his hand across her brow, "And warm, too..."  
  
"I'm just overheated from standing over this cauldron, Severus," she expained as she pushed his hand away. She removed her robe and rolled up the sleeves of her blouse before she returned to brewing her potion. As she reached her hands up to twist her long hair into a knot she said, "It's almost finished, and then I will go take a cool bath and get to bed."  
  
Severus' concerned looks did not go unnoticed as Hermione finished her work for the evening. She sighed when she finally finished, "All finished... I'll just get it bottled up and then I'll go..."  
  
"Go now," Severus urged her sternly, "I'll bottle it for you."  
  
"Thank you, Severus." Hermione walked over to the desk where she had left her robe, and as she tried to pull it on, she began to feel faint. She tried to brace herself against the desk as she felt her knees buckling beneath her. The last thing she remembered was a glass vial shattering on the stone floor followed by the sound of hurried footsteps and two strong arms catching her as she collapsed.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione heard a murmer of hushed voices as she slowly drifted back into consciousness. She didn't know if it had been minutes or hours since she had fainted, but it felt like it had been days. As her eyes slowly fluttered open, through her blurred vision she saw two concerned faces hovering over her as a soft cool hand brushed against her brow.  
  
"How are you feeling, Hermione?" she recognized the voice of Madame Pomfrey.  
  
"Mmm... sleepy..." she replied in a hoarse voice. A strong warm hand gently lifted her head as another held a glass of cool water to her parched lips, "What happened?"  
  
"It seems that you have the flu, young lady. Severus told me that you were looking quite peaked this evening... why didn't you tell anyone that you weren't feeling well?" the nurse chastised her.  
  
"Didn't feel sick... just tired," she mumbled.  
  
"Hmph." Poppy tutted at her, "You should be fine once the Pepper-up Potion takes effect. But I want you to get some rest! No getting out of this bed until I say so!"  
  
Hermione opened her eyes fully, and to her relief she was in her own bed rather than in the infirmary. "Samuel..." she began.  
  
"Is fine," Severus voice cut her off, "And I'll be here to make sure that he is well cared for while you get some sleep."  
  
Hermione didn't have the strength to argue, as she drifted back to sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Severus hadn't taken his eyes off of Hermione, watching her out of the corner of his eye as he began to bottle her completed potion. He saw her brace herself against the desk, and the vial that he was filling slipped from his hand and shattered as he rushed across the room to catch her before she collapsed to the cold stone floor.  
  
He swept her into his arms and carried her through the deserted dungeon corridor to her quarters. As he entered, his eyes flashed to Ginny Weasley, who had been on babysitting duty that night, and he snapped, "Madame Pomfrey... NOW!" as Ginny jumped to her feet and ran from the room.  
  
Severus gently laid Hermione on her bed, and after retrieving a cool wet washcloth from her bathroom, sat beside her and began to mop her brow. A few minutes later, Madame Pomfrey and Ginny rushed into the room. As Poppy hovered over Hermione, Ginny paced worriedly as she looked on in concern. Severus was nearly relieved to hear his son crying, as it provided a distraction for the girl who's pacing was beginning to grate on his last nerve.  
  
"What happened here, Severus?" Poppy asked.  
  
"She's not been looking well all evening, Poppy, and just as our session was ending tonight she fainted."  
  
Poppy shook her head and mumbled, "Stubborn girl... should know by now to ask for help..." she looked up at Severus and shot him a reassuring smile, "It's just the flu, Severus. She'll be fine after I administer some Pepper-up Potion, provided that she get some rest."  
  
Severus stood up to stretch his legs just as Hermione's eyes fluttered open. He and Poppy both leaned over the bed and looked at her in concern. As Poppy brushed her hand against Hermione's brow, Severus reached down to assist the young woman with a glass of water.  
  
A few minutes later, after Poppy gave Hermione strict orders to stay in bed and Severus assured her that Samuel was fine, the young woman drifted back off to sleep. Remembering that Ginny was still in the next room tending to Samuel, Severus saw Poppy to the door and went to retrieve his son.  
  
"Miss Weasley," remembering his promise to Hermione, he spoke softly to the girl instead of snarling or sneering. Ginny looked at him, her eyes full of concern for her friend. "Hermione will be fine. It's just the flu," he assured her. "You may go," he dismissed her, pausing a moment before adding a soft, "Thank you."  
  
Severus returned to Hermione's bedside, sitting in the rocking chair with his son as he watched over her. After rocking his son to sleep and returning him to his crib, Severus reclaimed his seat in the rocking chair. Extending his legs in front of him as he leaned back and closed his eyes, he stayed the night watching over the mother of his child.  
  
He was drifting off to sleep and didn't notice Hermione's sigh as she half-opened her eyes and smiled at the presence of the man sitting beside her bed.  
  
*****  
  
When Hermione woke the next morning, she was beginning to look much better. Still exhausted after the previous evening's ordeal, she followed Madame Pomfrey's orders to stay in bed. She opened her eyes and saw Severus still sitting in the rocking chair beside her bed, now awake with their son content in his arms. She smiled tiredly at him as he asked groggily, "Feeling better?"  
  
"Mmm... much," she yawned, "still tired..."  
  
"Get some rest, Hermione." he ordered her.  
  
"Bring Samuel to me?" she asked, continuing quietly as Severus frowned, "I miss him. I just want to hold him. I promise, I'll rest."  
  
Severus hesitated only a moment before carrying Samuel to Hermione's bed. He could see just how weak she still was, and was not quite sure if she could manage holding their son in her arms. He sighed at her in resignation as he saw the look in her eyes telling him that she would not sleep until she had nursed her son. He laid Samuel in the crook of Hermione's arm, and sat down on the bed beside them, supporting Samuel's other side to make sure that he was in a secure position.  
  
As he found himself drifting off to sleep again, he allowed his head to slowly drop to the pillows he had propped up behind him. He fell asleep there, beside Hermione with their son nestled contentedly between them. 


	22. Surprises

Author's Note: This chapter is a bit more lighthearted. I needed to tie up a few loose ends as well as begin laying the groundwork for what it to come, before moving on with the rest of the story. Enjoy!  
  
Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticisms are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 21 ~ The Surprise Visitor  
  
Severus was startled awake nearly two hours later by a knock on the door. Not wanting to disturb Hermione, he slipped gently off of the bed and propped pillows around Samuel so that the child would not roll off. He rubbed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair before opening the door. Remus Lupin looked into the room with a concerned look on his face.  
  
"Lupin." Severus grudgingly let him into the room.  
  
"How is she?" Remus asked quietly.  
  
Severus growled tiredly, "She's sleeping. Perhaps it would be better for you to come back later."  
  
Remus paused as if he wanted to say something before looking over to glance at Hermione, sleeping soundly on the bed with Samuel tucked in next to her. He smiled gently, "Yes, of course. I will be... out for the afternoon. I'll drop by this evening."  
  
Severus sighed as he returned to Hermione's side. This time, he left Samuel to sleep by her side and he resumed his place in the rocking chair. Samuel eventually woke up, but Hermione slept until late that afternoon, and by early evening Severus couldn't convince her to stay in bed any longer.  
  
"I can't lie around all day, Severus," she sighed in irritation, "I promise I'll take it easy. I just want to go sit by the fire. Perhaps do a bit of light reading."  
  
Severus reluctantly agreed, and allowed her to lean on him as he assisted her to the sofa. Handing her a warm blanket, he insisted that she put her feet up before he retrieved one of her text books. He summoned Dobby to bring her some warm broth and toast while he made a pot of tea. When Dobby returned with his tray of food, Severus carried it to Hermione and set it on a table that he had conjured in front of the sofa.  
  
"Thank you, Severus... but I don't have much of an appetite..." she broke off as Severus interrupted her.  
  
"I insist that you eat something if you wish to have any visitors this evening."  
  
"Visitors?" she asked in a surprised tone of voice.  
  
"Yes," he sighed, "Lupin dropped by while you were sleeping. I suggested that he return later... if you are up to it."  
  
"Oh," Hermione whispered as she pulled the tray on to her lap and began to slowly sip the warm broth. "Hmmm... you were right. I needed that."  
  
Severus smirked in satisfaction as Hermione finished her light meal before leaning back to drink her tea.  
  
Just as she finished, there was a knock on the door. Assuming that it would be Remus, Severus tried to supress a groan as he called "Enter".  
  
Indeed, it was Remus... and behind him was Elizabeth Granger.  
  
"Mum!" Hermione squealed as she tried to get up. One look from Severus was all she needed to sit back down as her mother approached the sofa.  
  
"Hermione!" Holding on to Remus' arm, Elizabeth made her way across the room to her daughter. There was a marked improvement in her walk, though she still wasn't completely steady on her feet. Remus helped her to sit, and she gathered her daughter into a tight embrace.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Hermione gushed excitedly.  
  
"I had made arrangements with Remus to come visit you today. He stopped by to tell you this morning, but you were sleeping."  
  
Severus avoided looking at Remus, after all it was his fault that Remus hadn't left a message, but he covered his guilty expression quickly as he asked, "Why didn't you tell me, Lupin? I'm sure Hermione would have liked to have known that her mother was coming for a visit."  
  
"Severus!" Hermione shushed him before looking at Remus, "Don't worry about it, Remus! Nothing could make me feel better than a surprise visit from my mother!" she smiled brilliantly, as Severus tried not to glare at the werewolf. How was it that Remus could make her smile like that, but Severus never could?  
  
Tearing his gaze away from Remus, Severus approached their guest, "Elizabeth, it's a pleasure to see you again."  
  
"Thank you, Severus," she smiled at him. Severus was just now noticing how much Hermione resembled her mother when she smiled. No wonder the werewolf was attracted to the elder Granger, he smirked to himself.  
  
"How are you feeling, sweetheart? Remus tells me you fell ill last evening." Elizabeth frowned as she reached up to brush the back of her hand against Hermione's brow.  
  
"It's just the flu, Mum," Hermione assured her, "I'm feeling much better now... Thanks to Severus," she smiled shyly as she looked beyond her mother to the man who had sat by her side throughout the night.  
  
"And my grandson?" Elizabeth looked around, not seeing Samuel anywhere in sight.  
  
"Allow me," Severus offered, as he walked into the nursery and gently plucked a sleeping Samuel out of his crib. When he returned, he placed his child into Elizabeth's arms as she looked up at him in admiration, "Hermione's lucky to have you here, Severus. Thank you for taking care of my daughter... and my grandson," she smiled lovingly at the child in her arms.  
  
Severus tried to conceal the color rising in his cheeks as he turned to Remus and said, "Well, Lupin... perhaps we should give these three some time alone."  
  
"That reminds me, Severus. Albus has called a meeting in the staff room. He'll be expecting us in about 15 minutes."  
  
"A staff meeting on a Saturday evening?" Severus sighed as he grabbed his robes, "Need I grab the brandy before we go?" he sneered as he stalked out the door behind Remus. Staff meetings on the weekends were rarely a sign of anything good, and by the time this one was over, Severus would regret not following through on his threat of having a stiff drink beforehand.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione and her mother spent the first part of the evening fawning over Samuel, as they caught up on what they had missed in each others' lives since they had last seen eacy other on Christmas. Elizabeth eventually brought up the living arrangements between Hermione and Severus.  
  
"I wasn't too sure about Severus when I met him, Hermione," Elizabeth smirked, "Dark and brooding... doesn't seem like your type at all."  
  
"My type?" Hermione squeaked.  
  
"You know what I mean, Hermione. I just didn't think the two of you would get on that well. But it appears that I was mistaken."  
  
"Oh... Yes..."  
  
"And Remus tells me that you're studying Potions with Severus?" she paused as Hermione nodded, "And...?" Elizabeth raised her eyebrow in question.  
  
"And WHAT, Mum?" Hermione asked in exasperation.  
  
"Well... how is it going?"  
  
They spent the next hour talking about Hermione's apprenticeship, and the complex potions that she was learning to brew. Hermione kept steering the subject back to her studies whenever Elizabeth would mention Severus. She didn't want her mother to get the wrong idea about the two of them.  
  
Just as Hermione was about to change the subject for the fifth time, Severus stalked through the door, grumbling incoherantly "the old fool... hearts and flowers... what is he thinking...?" Remus was behind him, an amused expression on his face.  
  
"What's wrong with Severus?" Hermione whispered to Remus quietly.  
  
Apparently, she hadn't said it quietly enough, as Severus whirled around, throwing his hands into the air as he fumed, "The old fool has let the Head Boy and Girl talk him in to having a Valentine's Day ball!"  
  
Knowing that the Head Girl was none other than Ginny Weasley, Hermione stifled a giggle and asked, "And the problem is...?"  
  
"I have no patience for hearts and flowers and students snogging in the bushes!" he growled as Remus stepped behind him and said, "Come now, Severus, it won't be that bad!"  
  
Severus snarled, "Easy for you to say, Lupin. You'll probably luck out and spend Valentine's Day with that blessed moon!"  
  
Hermione's jaw dropped at Severus' unintentional slip of the tongue. At least, she hoped that it was unintentional. Elizabeth likely didn't know that Remus was a werewolf, and this was no way for her to find out! She looked over to Remus, and saw that, though he looked none too pleased at Severus' words, he wasn't embarassed or angry. She was surprised to hear a soft voice speak up behind her, "I believe the full moon is only two days away from today."   
  
Hermione whirled around and saw her mother smiling softly. "You know about Remus?"  
  
Remus sighed and answered, "She was almost as quick to figure it out as you were in third year, Hermione."  
  
Elizabeth explained, "I remember you speaking of a professor who was a werewolf. You seemed quite fond of him at the time, if I recall," she explained, "Once I met Remus, it didn't take me too long to put two and two together. I knew for sure last month when he cut our visit short the night before the full moon."  
  
"Your visit last month?" Hermione gasped, "What...?"  
  
Elizabeth looked embarassed at what she had just blurted out. She smiled and explained, "Remus and I have become good friends, Hermione. He's visited me a couple of times a to update me on you and Samuel. How do you think I received the news of Samuel's birth?" Elizabeth looked up and smiled at Remus before continuing, "You couldn't ask for a better friend than Remus, Hermione. He's been good to me, as well."  
  
"Oh..." Hermione didn't know what to say. She thought maybe it was something more than that. She didn't know if she should be relieved or disappointed... did she want it to be something more than that? She sighed as she smiled at her mother, "I worry about you so much, Mum... knowing that Remus checks in on you once in a while eases my mind a bit. I only wish I could do it, myself," her smile quickly turned to a frown.  
  
Elizabeth took a deep breath before she said, "I've been meaning to talk to you about that, Hermione."  
  
"What, Mum... you're not going to try to talk me into coming home...?" Hermione choked.  
  
"Oh! No dear! Not at all..." she sighed, "It's just that... I don't think I can continue to live alone in that big empty house. I've decided to sell, and move into a smaller flat. I was hoping to find... something closer... to be near you."  
  
Hermione squealed in delight, "Oh Mum! Really? That would be... wonderful!"  
  
Elizabeth reached over and patted her daughter's hand, glancing briefly at Remus as she said, "I think so, as well."  
  
*****  
  
Remus had made arrangements with Albus for Elizabeth to spend the night rather than rush her back to London that evening. They had set her with her own quarters... a small room on the first floor that was occasionally used for overnight visitors. Sunday morning, Elizabeth sat with all of them at the staff table for breakfast, next to Hermione.  
  
Severus sat brooding over his coffee when the discussion turned to the upcoming Valentine's ball. Albus leaned over and looked at Elizabeth, "If you'd like to join us next weekend, Dr. Granger..."  
  
Elizabeth was taken aback for a moment, "Thank you, Professor Dumbledore. But I'm afraid that another trip so soon may be a bit too much for me."  
  
"Mum," Hermione spoke up, "Why don't you stay with me for the week? I don't get to see you very often... I'm not ready for you to go!"  
  
"An excellent idea, Hermione," Albus replied jovially.  
  
Elizabeth shook her head, "I don't want to impose..."  
  
"Not at all, Dr. Granger. Please, do stay," he smiled kindly at her.  
  
The only further convincing she needed was the smile on Hermione's face. She nodded and smiled at the Headmaster, "Very well, I'll stay!"  
  
*****  
  
Though Valentine's Day would not be until the middle of the following week, the ball had been planned for the upcoming Saturday. As the weekend approached, Hermione was becoming excited about attending the ball, along with her mother. With the exception of meals in the Great Hall and her sessions with Severus, she had spent far too much time cooped up over the winter, and she was eager to get out. She left Samuel in Severus' care on Friday evening, as Remus escorted her and Elizabeth to visit Hogsmeade. Hermione needed new dress robes, and thought her mother would love seeing the village. Elizabeth also wanted to get a new dress for the evening. She hadn't packed anything formal for what she had originally planned to be a weekend visit, and she didn't want to feel out of place among the witches and wizards who would be wearing their formal dress robes.  
  
Hermione and her mother enjoyed spending time together in the village that day, and enjoyed preparing for the ball the next evening even more. The Granger women were not about frills and lace... they both had simple but elegant tastes in clothing, and their choice of formal wear reflected this. Hermione dressed in robes made of a soft flowy material in a shimmery emerald green. They were slightly form-fitting with a low, square neckline, and back of the robes draped elegantly from her shoulders. Her mother chose a full length dress of the same soft material in a blue so deep, it was almost black. The dress had long, fitted sleeves that flared at the wrists, and an empire waistline. The front of the gown was nearly straight, while the back was slightly fuller as it draped down to her ankles. Hermione assured her that the style of her dress would not lok out of place among the robes that the students and staff would be wearing. The women giggled in delight as they dressed Samuel for the evening as well, in tiny robes of green to match Hermione's.   
  
It had been many years since Hermione and Elizabeth had the occasion to go out for an evening together. Their time spent getting ready for the ball together had been bittersweet, as it was the first time they were going anywhere formal without Hermione's father, but their moods lightened as they heard a knock on the door. It was Remus, who had arrived to escort them to the Great Hall. He smiled brilliantly as he saw the two women dressed so elegantly, and he held his arm out for Elizabeth to take hold of the crook of his elbow. Hermione carried Samuel, looking adorable in his very first set of robes, and she tried not to feel nervous as they made their way to the Great hall. 


	23. No Hearts and Flowers

Author's Note: Sigh Valentine's Day... let the romance begin. ;)  
  
Thank you again for reading my story. All questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
*******  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*************  
  
Chapter 22 ~ No Hearts and Flowers  
  
Severus was prowling the corridors, hurrying the students along to the Great Hall. He was annoyed already, and the ball had barely even started. He scowled as he thought forward to later that evening, when he would have to patrol the school grounds as well, chasing errant students back inside.  
  
Hearing footsteps behind him, he whirled around to lecture the approaching students about lingering in the corridor, only to find that it wasn't students at all.  
  
Remus Lupin was walking towards him, with Elizabeth on his arm. But he hardly noticed them. It was the young woman who was a few steps behind them who caught his attention. Severus' breath caught in his throat as she stepped into view.  
  
As they had grown closer over the past two months, he had come to view Hermione as a lovely young woman. But tonight... tonight she was radiant. He found himself staring, and had to force himself to look away from her. He was almost greatful for the distraction of Remus greeting him, "Good Evening, Severus."  
  
Severus suddenly remembered why he was there, and began to breathe again as he answered, "We'll see about that, Lupin. I rather think I'll be too busy chaperoning this infernal affair to have a 'good evening'," he groaned.   
  
As Hermione stepped closer, Severus noticed their son in her arms. This time, he didn't hide his smile as he looked down at Samuel dressed in green robes, "Ah... there's my little Slytherin," he whispered as he reached out to touch his son's cheek.  
  
"Hmph... Slytherin, eh?" Hermione faked a scowl, "Maybe I should have bought him robes of red and gold."  
  
"You wouldn't dare," he scoffed, "No son of mine..."  
  
Hermione interrupted, "We'll see about that!" she teased as she turned to follow Remus and her mother into the Hall, leaving Severus speechless behind them as he couldn't help but notice how graceful she looked with her Slytherin-green robes flowing behind her as she walked away.  
  
*****  
  
Remus left them just inside the great hall, as he went to join the other professors to find out where he might be needed to chaperone the evening. Hermione and her mother took a seat at a table in the back corner, as neither of them intended to dance that evening. They had come along just to enjoy watching the festivities, and didn't want to be in the way of the students. Elizabeth joked that she was glad to not be the only 'old maid' in attendance. Hermione laughed at her mother as she chastised, "Who are you calling 'old'?"  
  
A soft voice broke in behind them, "And what are two lovely young women such as yourself doing, sitting all alone back here in the corner?"  
  
Hermione smiled, and Elizabeth blushed at the emphasis that was put on the word 'young', as they turned around to find Remus smiling behind them.   
  
"You've got a great view of the Hall from here... I can't think of a better place to sit where I can still keep an eye on the students. Mind if I join you?" he asked.  
  
"Not at all," Hermione replied, as Remus pulled out a chair and sat down between the two of them.  
  
They sat there most of the evening, with Remus occasionally excusing himself to make his rounds of the Hall. Hermione couldn't help glancing around periodically, wondering if Severus would be coming inside. She sighed when she eventually realized that he was likely to stay out in the corridor all evening, catching students who were bound to try sneaking off to some dark corner of the castle.  
  
An hour later, Remus had just returned to the table after making another round of the Hall, he smiled at them as he said, "It seems that every professor has had a dance partner this evening, except for myself. Which of you ladies might be willing to do me the honor?"  
  
Hermione looked at her mother, urging her to have just one dance tonight. "Hermione... I don't know if I can. These feet haven't danced in a long time..." Elizabeth smiled at her daughter and urged her to go, taking Samuel into her arms and smiling wistfully as Remus whisked her daughter onto the dance floor. He was a graceful dancer, and Elizabeth would have given anything to be the one dancing with him.  
  
After one dance with Remus, Hermione rejoined her mother at the table, smiling encouragingly at her. "Mum... I know you can do it. Besides, Remus would never let you fall." Elizabeth smiled regretfully in return as she shook her head.   
  
Remus smiled at her as he said, "If you change your mind..."  
  
"I'll let you know," she whispered in reply.  
  
*****  
  
Severus was getting bored, having scared so many students back into the hall that he doubted any of them would dare try to sneak out again. He hadn't seen a single soul in over an hour. His mind kept drifting to Hermione, and the way she looked tonight in her flowy green robes... the way her hair spilled down her back in glossy ringlets... the rosy glow on her cheeks. He finally decided that he had had enough of prowling around in the shadows, and he walked towards the Great Hall, intent on joining Hermione and her mother at their corner table. He knew exactly where they were sitting, as he hadn't been able to resist taking more than one glance into the Hall earlier that evening.  
  
When he reached the Great Hall, he stopped in the doorway, his brow furrowing in confusion as he saw that Elizabeth was sitting alone, holding Samuel. As his eyes scanned the dance floor, he found Hermione waltzing gracefully with Remus. Scowling, he turned away and stalked outside.  
  
Inhaling the fresh air deeply, he closed his eyes as he thought about Hermione's smile as she danced in the werewolf's arms. As he began to wander the school grounds, he reminded himself over and over... Hermione and Remus were friends, that was all. Of that much, he was sure. Besides, it was obvious to him that Remus had feelings for Hermione's mother, no matter how much the werewolf tried to deny it.   
  
Severus stopped by the lake and looked up to the sky, gazing deeply into the stars as if they held the answers. He groaned inwardly as he tried to figure out why it bothered him so to see them together.  
  
He and Remus had made peace long ago, agreeing to let go of the past, for the sake of the Order. Over time, he had even developed a grudging respect for the werewolf, even if he would never admit it to anybody but himself. But, seeing the way Remus was with Hermione... their easy, open friendship... the way he could comfort her with a soft smile, a gentle word, or a single touch... the way that he could make her smile so brilliantly... the way he made her laugh... the way Hermione would throw her arms around him in an open display of affection.   
  
Severus had rarely, if ever, been able to do any of that for her. Somehow, Remus made Severus feel inferior when it came to the mother of his child.  
  
He sighed as he finally admitted to himself that it was't Remus that was the problem... it was him.  
  
*****  
  
Nearly every student that Hermione had known from back in her school days had stopped by their table to admire her son that evening. She had been surprised that she hadn't heard any speculation among the students about Samuel's father, and was relieved that nobody had asked. It wasn't that she was afraid to admit to the public that Severus was the father of her child, it was the thought of the possibility that she might be asked 'how?'. Even though it wasn't spoken aloud, Hermione did begin to notice a number of curious stares, and after a while she began feeling a bit uncomfortable. Leaving Samuel in the care of her mother, Remus, and Professor McGonagall (who had joined them at the table to take a few minutes off her feet while she became better acquainted with Elizabeth) Hermione excused herself for some fresh air.  
  
Walking through the entrance hall, she slipped out of the castle through the main entrance, and stood on the front steps inhaling the crisp fresh air. It was a beautiful evening. The air was refreshingly cool, but not too cold, as she made her way down the steps and began to walk down the path to the garden, enjoying the luxury of a nighttime stroll. She looked up and sighed at the stars glittering in the black sapphire sky, smiling as she realized just how long it had been since she had enjoyed walking outside like this. Being out here, looking at the glorious night sky, made her feel... alive.  
  
She hated to have to go back inside, but after walking through the gardens without a cloak to keep her warm, she was beginning to feel the deep chill of the winter air. Sighing regretfully as she whirled around to head back inside, she collided into something. She gasped as she took a step back, her foot sliding on a patch of ice, nearly causing her to fall backwards.  
  
But she didn't fall. Through a flurry of black robes, two hands darted forward and caught her by the elbows, before gently sliding upwards to rest behind her shoulders, steadying her on her feet. She looked up to find two black eyes staring at her in concern, as a deep silky voice asked, "Are you alright?"  
  
"Severus... I..."  
  
"You shouldn't be out here in the snow after having had the flu last week." His voice was gentle, not demanding, as he chastised her.  
  
Hermione couldn't break away from his gaze as she whispered, "I just needed some air."  
  
Their eyes were locked as he softly said, "You're shivering..."  
  
Hermione felt a pang of regret as his warm hands moved away from her shoulders, and as she looked down to hide her disappointment, she heard the rustle of heavy fabric. Severus had removed his cloak and gently placed it around her. She looked back up in surprise just as his hands were lingering at the base of her throat, after fastening the clasp of the cloak. She felt his fingertips briefly brush against her neck, tickling her as he slowly slid his warm hands back to her shoulders, and their eyes locked again as he asked quietly, "Better?"  
  
"Much," she whispered hoarsely, getting lost in the depth of those deep black eyes.  
  
"You're still shivering," he said gently as he moved his hands gently up and down her arms to warm her.  
  
"Am I?" she whispered breathlessly, not resisting as his hands pulled her closer to the warmth of his body. They stood there, inches apart, staring into each others eyes for an eternity. She fought not to close her eyes at the feel of his warm breath caressing her cheek, and she felt another shiver down her spine. Only this time, it wasn't because she was cold.  
  
*****  
  
Severus had been walking back from the lake that evening, when he saw the shadowy figure of a young female lurking in the gardens. Assuming that it was a student, waiting to meet illicitly with another, he crept stealthily behind the individual. He was nearly close enough to reach out and tap her on the shoulder, but just as he approached, the girl whirled around and collided with him. He looked down, startled to see two honey-brown eyes staring up at him. It was Hermione.  
  
He reached out and grabbed her by the elbows as she stepped back and slipped on a patch of ice. Sliding his hands up to Hermione's shoulders to steady her, his eyes locked with hers. He could feel her shivering, and knew that he should get her inside, but he didn't want to move. He wasn't even aware of speaking to her before removing his cloak and draping it gently around her shoulders. He fastened the clasp, his hands lingering at the base of her warm throat, feeling her soft hair tickling them as he slid them back to her shoulders. He looked upon her face, and his breath caught in his throat. He knew that she was beautiful, but how had he never noticed how utterly breathtaking she was before this evening? He couldn't look away from those beautiful eyes, which were glittering with the reflection of the stars. He felt her shiver again. He was still lost in those eyes, even as his hands unconsciously pulled her closer to him. She was so close that their bodies were nearly touching.  
  
"I should get you back inside," he said in a raspy voice, reluctantly pulling away after he felt her shiver a third time, not realizing that it was his touch that had made her tremble.  
  
He placed an arm gently around her shoulder, keeping her close to his side as they walked ever so slowly back to the school. Lost in his thoughts, he was barely aware of approaching the Great Hall. A soft gasp from Hermione pulled him back to the present, and he paused as he felt her stiffen beside him.   
  
*****  
  
Hermione didn't remember much about their walk back to the school. All she knew was that she felt warm and safe pulled close to Severus' side. She didn't even think about pulling away from him as they entered the school and walked through the entrance hall. As they entered the Great Hall, she stopped dead in her tracks. There, on the dance floor, was her mother dancing in the arms of Remus Lupin. But they were more than just dancing... her mother was locked tightly in his embrace, as her head rested against his shoulder with a dreamy smile on her face.   
  
"Severus," Hermione choked, "I think I'm ready to go..."  
  
She was barely aware of Severus nodding and leading her over to the table where a smiling Professor McGonagall was sitting with their son. She didn't hear him explain that it was getting late, and that it was past Samuel's bedtime. Once Samuel was in her arms, she hurried out of the Great Hall, without a single word to anybody.   
  
Her mind was reeling as she made her way to the dungeons. Though, in the back of her mind, Hermione had begun to have suspiscions about her mother and Remus, she had refused to let herself to fully acknowlege it before now. But after having seen them just now, there was no denying it. Her mother was falling in love with Remus Lupin.  
  
She sighed, trying to figure out exactly what was bothering her about it, when she should have been happy for the two of them. Hermione loved both her mother and Remus... and she knew that they would be good for each other. She had even fancied the idea of the two of them growing closer over time. But, she wondered if it was too soon... her father hadn't even been gone for a year yet. She felt as though it might be a betrayal of her father's memory if she let herself be happy for her mother, and she felt a fresh stab of grief over the loss of her father.   
  
She tried not to think about the look on her mother's face as she danced with Remus. Hermione knew that look... it was one that she had witnessed hundreds of times over the first eighteen years of her life... one that she had only seen when her mother looked at her father.   
  
But there was something more that was bothering her... another nagging feeling in the back of her mind that she couldn't quite put her finger on.  
  
When they reached the dungeons, she entered her bedroom quickly, nearly forgetting that Severus was behind her. She passed through her own room to the nursery, where she settled down in the rocking chair to nurse Samuel. She tried to focus on her son, putting the image of Remus and her mother out of her mind as she rocked her son to sleep. After gently laying her sleeping son in his crib, she returned to her room to find Severus waiting on the sofa.  
  
Hermione didn't meet his eyes as she suddenly realized what else it was that had been bothering her. She walked over to the fireplace, where she stood for a few moments, staring into the flames. Severus stood and walked over to her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder as he asked, "Are you alright?"  
  
She shook her head as she barely managed to whisper, "No..."  
  
Severus stepped closer and place his other hand on her back, "Did seeing them together bother you?"  
  
" No... Yes... I don't know!" She sighed, "I... it was just... unexpected."  
  
She took a deep breath before she continued, "It wasn't the fact that they were dancing... it was the way he was holding her, and the way she was looking at him... I can see that she's falling in love with him, and..." she inhaled another deep breath, as she began to tremble. She could feel her eyes growing misty.  
  
"And what?" he asked softly as his hand soothingly rubbed her back.  
  
"And I wish it had been me, dancing in the arms of the man I ..." she broke off as she found herself unable to finish that sentiment.  
  
She heard Severus' sharp intake of breath as he took a step back and asked, "You wish... you had been the one dancing with Lupin?"  
  
"No! Not with Remus!"  
  
"Then who?" he asked. She could hear the confusion in his voice, and she turned around to look into his black eyes.   
  
A single tear rolled down her cheek as she whispered, "Dance with me?" 


	24. I Hope You Dance

Author's Note: groan I know I've said this before, but believe me when I say that THIS was the hardest chapter I've ever written. It was so tempting to just rush them into things... but I knew I couldn't do that! I've been building up to it for so long, I want to make sure it was just.... perfect.  
  
One of the things I promised myself when I began this story was that I would not "Americanize" it if I could help it. But, when I got a bit of writer's block in the middle of this chapter, a song came on the radio that inspired me. Fortunately, it seems to fit in the era of this story, so I've written a verse of it into one of the later segments of this chapter.  
  
So, on with the story! Will they or won't they? You'll have to read to find out. And please, no throwing heavy objects at me when you reach the end of the chapter. I think I could handle rotten tomatos or eggs, but nothing that could knock me unconscious or I won't be able to continue. :p  
  
One big final note: Thank you so much to my reviewers! Every single word means the world to me! I would have probably stuck to my original outline and had this complete in 20 chapters if not for your encouragement. I'm so thankful that you've given me the motivation to flesh it out a bit more... I don't even know how many chapters it will end up being now, but I am enjoying writing it more than you can imagine. Thank you, also, to all of my silent readers. Each and every one of you out there inspire me to continue.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 24 ~ "I Hope You Dance"  
  
"Dance with me?"  
  
Ever so slowly, Severus raised one hand to cup Hermione's face. She leaned into his touch, closing her eyes as his thumb brushed away a tear. His other hand found its way to her waist, and she moved closer to him as she felt it come to rest on her hip. Hesitantly, Hermione laid her head against his chest, tucking it snugly beneath his chin as his hand moved from her cheek to the back of her head, his fingers tangling in her soft hair as he ran them through the length of her silky curls, gently caressing her back as his hand made it's way to her waist and back up again, finally coming to rest on her shoulder.  
  
"Is this... what you wanted?" he asked her quietly.  
  
Hermione simply nodded her head.  
  
"But there is no music..." he rasped.  
  
"Isn't there?"  
  
Severus sighed as he bowed his face into her hair, inhaling deeply as his thoughts went over the events that had led up to this moment. One minute, Severus had thought Hermione to be on the verge of confessing a secret love for Remus Lupin... the next minute, she was looking at him with tears in her eyes as she asked him to dance.  
  
For all that he had dreamed of her, nothing he had ever imagined had even come close to how it actually felt to hold her in his arms. He marvelled at the feel of her soft curves pressed against him. He had a hard time believing this was real, and he found himself slowly caressing her as committed every contour of her body to memory, storing them away with his other memories of her ~ the scent of her hair, the sound of her voice ~ in the special places of his heart and mind that he reserved for the mother of his child.  
  
He felt her pull her head away from his chest and tilt it up towards him, and he looked down at her just as her cheek came to rest against his. It was all he could do to suppress a shudder as he realized that her soft lips were nearly brushing his jaw. And then he felt it... the music... the steady rythym of her heart as it beat against him.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione didn't know how she came to be in Severus' arms. One minute, he was brushing a tear from her cheek, the next minute, she found herself sighing softly as she lay her head against his chest. She marvelled in the feel of the contour of his strong chest through his robes, delighting as she inhaled the musky scent that was uniquely Severus.  
  
It didn't matter that there was no music... Hermione could hear Severus' heart beating, matching the rythym of her own as they began to slowly sway back and forth. For the few tender moments they had shared in the past, nothing compared to this. She lifted her head and let her cheek come to rest against his, closing her eyes as she let her hand drift to the nape of his neck, feeling the silky texture of his hair as it brushed against her fingers.  
  
"Hermione, I..."   
  
"Hmmmm???"  
  
"I hear the music," Severus said in a hoarse whisper as she felt him take a deep breath and lift his head to gently press his lips to her temple. Hermione tightened her arms around him as she once again buried her head against his chest, and one of his hands began to softly caress the swell of her hip.  
  
They stood there, locked into an embrace more intimate than either of them had ever experienced before, their feet barely moving as they continued to sway to the music that only the two of them could hear.  
  
*****  
  
They stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity, dancing well into the night until the fire had burned down to nothing more than glowing embers. Severus reluctantly pulled away, his eyes searching her beautiful face as he reached up again to caress her cheek, leaning in to place another kiss to her temple as he whispered "It's getting late... I should go..."  
  
As he turned to go to his rooms, he felt her soft hand reach out and grab his.  
  
"Stay with me?"  
  
Abruptly, he turned back to her, his eyes searching hers once again. What was that he saw in her eyes? Surely, it couln't be.... desire?   
  
Desperately, he reached out and grabbed her by the shoulders, pausing only a moment before pulling her back to him and crushing her in his embrace as his mouth sought out her soft lips.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione felt a pang of disappointment when Severus pulled away and bid her goodnight. As he turned away, she knew that she couldn't let him go... she wanted him to stay, to feel his arms around her again, to feel the strength of his warm chest as she rested her head upon it.  
  
She didn't even know what she was going to say to him as her hand darted out and grabbed one of his, and was almost as surprised as he looked to be when she blurted, "Stay with me?".  
  
The next thing she knew, she was back in his arms, crushed against his chest once more. His kiss was firm, yet tender, as his warm lips met desperately with hers. She responded in kind, her mouth softly carressing his. She couldn't suppress a soft moan as his lips found her jaw, leaning her head back as he traced a path down her neck to her shoulders. Gasping as his hands slid up her arms, one of them sliding around her to hold her as the other began to caress her breast, she knew that she would not let him leave.  
  
"Please, Severus..." she began, forgetting what she wanted to say as he reached down to scoop her up into his arms. He carried her across the room, laying her gently on her bed, and leaning over for one last kiss before whispering, "Good night, Hermione."  
  
****  
  
Was this real? Surely, this beautiful creature wasn't standing here before him, asking him to stay... letting him kiss and touch her in ways that he could have only dreamed about. He swept her up into his arms, carrying her across the room and laying her gently on her bed.   
  
But no... he couldn't do this. He didn't want to take her this way. He could see that she wanted him, but he didn't want this time to be a result of them getting carried away in the aftermath of the emotional events of the evening. Look what happened last time! He could not... would not allow himself to hurt her again as he had that night in the forest. For even now... even though he knew that he hadn't forced her that time, he still knew that he had hurt her in the aftermath of their passion.  
  
Regretfully, he leaned over, kissed her gently, and whispered "Good night," before turning around and rushing off to his room, leaving Hermione lying on the bed gaping at the robes billowing behind him as he walked away.  
  
Even the long cold shower he subjected himself to couldn't diminish the desire he was feeling for Hermione that night. He stalked over to the liquor cabinet, reaching his bottle of brandy. He swirled the liquid around in the bottle before changing his mind. He would not taint the sweet taste of her lips... the taste that was still lingering on his own lips... with a liquid as vile as that. Putting it back, he opted instead for a glass of red wine.  
  
He groaned as he sat in the chair by the fire, sipping the sweet wine, remembering the taste of Hermione's kiss, and cursing himself for being so bloody stupid.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione leaned back against her pillows and groaned her frustration. Why did he leave her like that? She could see that he wanted her, but she hadn't been able to convince him to stay.   
  
Maybe he didn't want her, after all. Maybe it was all for the best, she thought as she remembered the first and only time they had been intimate, that night in the forest, and how he had wanted to forget it ever happened. If she was grateful for one thing tonight, it was that she wouldn't have to see him walk away in shame afterwards.  
  
She sighed as she rose from the bed, he legs shaking as she made her way to the bathroom and began to draw a bath. Slipping into the warm water a few minutes later, she tried to lean back and relax... but every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Severus. She could still feel his warm hands on her skin, still hear his heart beating as his arms had held her so close.  
  
When she emerged from her bath, she was nearly grateful to hear her son crying in the next room. Yes... she needed a distraction. Furthermore, she needed the comfort of holding her son in her arms. Not even bothering to don a dressing gown after she quickly slipped a silky nightgown over her head, she walked to Samuel's room and gently lifted him into her arms.  
  
Looking down at him, all she could see was Severus. Their son was looking more like his father every day.  
  
As she sat and nursed her son, Hermione sighed, "Why does your father have to be such a complicated man, little one?"  
  
She had a hard time getting Samuel back to sleep that night... but she was not going to bother Severus for help. Not tonight. No, she would have to see him again soon enough, in the morning. Surely, she could manage one night pacing with her son on her own. It wasn't as though she would be able to fall asleep tonight, anyway.  
  
Remembering the intimate dance she had just shared with Severus, Hermione began swaying back and forth with her son. Her gentle humming soon became a soft song... remembering the lyrics of an American song that she had heard playing on the radio one day in London, she began to sing the verse that struck a chord with her this night:  
  
"Livin' might mean takin' chances but they're worth takin', Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin',  
  
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter, When you come close to sellin' out reconsider,  
  
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance, And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance."  
  
She didn't hear the door open behind her, nor did she sense any other presence in the room as she placed her now-sleeping son in his crib.  
  
"I hope you dance," she whispered the last line of the song to her son as she leaned over and kissed him goodnight. As she stood to leave the room, she felt warm breath on her hair as a pair of warm arms wrap around her waist from behind.  
  
*****  
  
Severus had heard his son begin to cry, but as he approached the door, he could hear Hermione in the nursery tending to Samuel. He leaned against the door, contemplating whether he should go in. No, he decided. She rarely needed help with her son during the night these days, and he didn't know if he could bear seeing her again so soon. He was afraid that he might do something that they would both regret. But when he heard Samuel begin to cry again, and the sound of her feet shuffling back and forth through the nursery a few minutes later, he decided to check on them. Silently opening the door, he stepped into the room. He watched silently as Hermione danced with their son, singing him to sleep.  
  
Her voice was low, but pleasant... to Severus, it was one of the sweetest sounds he had ever heard. He couldn't take his eyes off her, in her bare feet and flimsy nightgown, as she swayed back and forth. What was that song? It certainly wasn't wizard music, and he stepped closer to hear the words that she was singing. He was almost close enough to reach out to her as she laid Samuel down in his crib.  
  
"I hope you dance," he heard her whisper. He couldn't resist reaching out and slipping his hands around her waist as she leaned in to kiss her son goodnight.  
  
Hermione gasped and turned around, still in his arms, her eyes locking with his just as intensely as they had so many times earlier in the evening. Images of those eyes ~ reflecting the stars as they stood in the gardens, crying as she asked him to dance, full of desire as she asked him to stay ~ flashed through his mind. Her eyes never lied... if he hadn't realized it earlier that evening, he realized it now. She had truly wanted him to stay, and as he looked into them once again, he could see that she still did.  
  
He leaned in and softly captured her lips with his own, and knew that no other kiss would ever compare to this. Not the desperate kiss that he had shared with her only an hour ago, not the sweet tender kiss he had shared with her only weeks ago, and certainly not the kiss that had led to their passion that night in the forest. He didn't even remember that first kiss, but knew in his heart and soul that it could have been nothing compared to this one.  
  
When he felt her responding, her mouth sweetly carressing his own, he once more reached down and swept her into his arms. This time, there was no doubt in his mind where he would be staying tonight. 


	25. No Regrets

Author's Note: I guess I'd better post a warning, so nobody's virgin eyes will be offended: This chapter is rated R!  
  
I was very nervous writing this chapter, I wanted it to be sensual without being TOO explicit. I hope I have achieved a decent balance... I've never tried to write a love scene before, and I hope this one satisfies my readers!  
  
Thank you again to my reviewers! Hugs and love to each and every one of you. And also to my readers, I know you are out there as I watch my hit counter averaging 500 per chapter. Even now, I'm not completely confident in my writing abilities, but every hit and every review gives me the little boost that I need to continue.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 24 ~ No Regrets  
  
Severus was still kissing Hermione tenderly as he laid her on the bed. He backed away only a few inches, lovingly brushing her hair back from her brow with his fingertips as his hands gently cupped her face. His eyes searched hers for any sign of hesitation... he found none. He saw the answer in her eyes as her intense gaze met with his.  
  
His hands were shaking as he slowly slid one of them down her body, his fingers skimming over her warm skin as they traveled down her bare arm before moving to gently caress her breast through the thin material of her nightgown. He groaned as he felt it's hard peak pressing into the palm of his hand, and heard her gasp as he gently rubbed it with his thumb. Moving his hand away to continue the exploration of her body, he found his touch lingering at the dip of her waist before running its way down to gently clutch at her round hip. He ran his fingers down to her knee, gently caressing her outer thigh as he slowly inched the silky material up her leg.  
  
He paused for a moment when he heard her gasp of surprise, and pulled back to look at her once again. She was softly biting her lip as she panted short breaths. His other hand that had been curled into her hair moved downwards as he brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. When she opened her eyes, he saw the flames of desire in them as she nodded her head to him in reassurance. He bent down to capture her lips once more in a tender kiss, before trailing his lips along her jaw and down her neck, as his hand once again laced into her soft curls and the other continued its explorations of her body.  
  
Her skin was so soft and smooth... like satin, and her hair felt like fine threads of silk laced between his fingers. He moaned as he moved his lips to nip at her shoulder, lowering the thin strap of her nightgown to expose the tender flesh of her collarbone. He could smell the fragrance of her skin, still fresh from her recent bath, and deeply inhaled the scent of her as he continued to move his lips lower. The creamy flesh of her breasts was slightly exposed as her collar had slipped lower, and he moved the other strap of her nightown down her arm until he had freed them from the flimsy material, slowly moving his other hand to the nape of her neck, raising her torso slightly off of the bed and closer to him. Starting at tender flesh at the base of her neck, he kissed his way back down to her now-exposed breasts, laving them with tender kisses before gently nibbling their peaks. When he felt her writhing underneath him, he gently lowered her back to the bed as he kissed his way down to her navel, his hand once again clutching at her nightgown as he pushed it upwards to expose her thigh. His fingers tenderly slipped around to caress her inner thigh, his thumb brushing her most sensitive area as she bucked against him in surprise.  
  
The feel of her trembling fingers unbuttoning his silk pajamas was almost his undoing. He groaned as she slipped her hands inside and began to rub them against his chest. He reached up and gently touched her hand, kissing her swollen lips once more as he encouraged her to begin her own explorations of his body.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was trembling by the time Severus had carried her to the bed. She hoped that he wouldn't misinterpret her nervousness.... she wasn't nervous about being with HIM, she was nervous about her relative inexperience with intimacy. Nobody had ever touched so tenderly, and she had convinced herself that nobody would ever want to. Especially Severus... not again... not after the last time. But now, here he was, kissing her, caressing her, touching her in ways that she had never even imagined. And yes, she was nervous. What if she didn't live up to his expectations?  
  
She set her fears aside when he paused his ministrations to caress her cheek as he looked searchingly at her face. She nodded the answer to the question that she saw in his eyes. Yes, she was ready, and willing, to let him take her to places that she had never been before.  
  
Her hands shaking, she hesitantly began to unbutton the shirt of his silk pajamas. She slipped her hand inside, tracing light circles on his warm skin with the palm of her hand as she marvelled at the contours of his smooth chest. She was surprised when he reached for her hand, only to encourage her to continue. She slowly eased the shirt down his arms, and moved to hold her hand over his heart, feeling it's steady beat, before reaching up to his shoulders and pulling him down against her once more. She smiled inwardly as he gently nudged her hands downwards, to the waistband of his trousers.  
  
She felt him raise his hips slightly, giving her room to slide his pants down to his knees before toeing them down to his ankles with her bare feet. As he lowered himself against her, kicking the trousers off of his feet and onto the floor, she felt the hard, warm skin of his manhood brush against her. With a gasp, she reached to cup her hands to his firm buttocks, kissing him fiercely and running her foot slowly up and down his leg, encouraging him to enter.  
  
He pulled back and looked into her eyes one last time, and she felt him crush his lips to hers, kissing her breathless as they joined together as one... her hands clutched his thighs in desperation, holding him to her as if she never wanted to let go.  
  
*****  
  
Merlin! She felt so good... he couldn't believe that it was real, as he rolled to his side, pulling her with him as he circled his arms around her. He could feel her breath on his chest as she curled up next to him in the afterglow of their lovemaking.  
  
Severus lay there, staring at the canopy of the bed in wonder. He had just made love to this amazing woman... the mother of his child, his intellectual equal, the woman who had been haunting his dreams for some weeks now. For the first time in his life, he had been intimate with a woman who had been more than a means of physical release for him.... not to mention the mind boggling fact that she actually wanted him in return!  
  
Severus was certainly not new to sex... no, he knew where to find a willing body when he needed one... but he had never truly 'made love' to a woman, and truthfully never had known there was a difference. Until now. Pulling her closer, he turned his head towards her and kissed her temple. She was half asleep, a gentle smile on her lips as she lay there more peacefully than he had ever seen her before. He closed his eyes, falling asleep with her wrapped in his arms.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione lay content in Severus' warm embrace, her head nestled against his chest. It was so comfortable here, she didn't ever want to him to leave. Their lovemaking was more intense than anything she could have imagined, and she wanted to ingrain that memory into her mind for eternity. With a smile on her face, she fell into pleasant dreams, still encircled in Severus' arms.  
  
When she awoke a few hours later, she smiled to herself as she remembered their passion. So different from the last time, she thought as she remembered the night that they had conceived Samuel.  
  
Thinking about her son, she suddenly bolted upright in panic. It was only the second time she had ever made love, and for the second time, she hadn't taken any precautions. She had no potions, and knew no charms.  
  
*How can somebody so brilliant be so bloody stupid. Not once, but twice!* She berated herself silently.  
  
She tried to lay back down without disturbing Severus... she didn't want him to know that she had done something so foolish again. She would just go visit Madame Pomfrey in the morning. She sat up again, groaning to herself as she realized that going to Madame Pomfrey would mean that somebody else would have to know that she and Severus had slept together... and this evening was something so intimate and personal that she wanted to keep it just between the two of them.  
  
Hearing Severus stirring beside her, she tried to put it out of her mind.  
  
*****  
  
Severus was startled out of his slumber by the sound of Hermione bolting upwards and groaning. Groggily, he asked, "What's wrong?" As he looked over to her, he saw her eyes darting back and forth in alarm. He began to grow concerned when she didn't answer... was she regretting their lovemaking? Propping himself up on one elbow, he reached his hand out to stroke her hair as he asked, "Hermione?"  
  
She shook her head as she lay back down and curled up to him, "It's nothing... nothing for you to be concerned about." But her eyes told a different story.  
  
He pulled her closer and brushed back a lock of her hair as he said, "If it concerns you, it concerns me. Now tell me. What is it?"  
  
Hermione sighed, and didn't meet his eyes as she muttered, "I don't have any.... potions."  
  
Severus smirked, "Hermione, give me your wand."  
  
She furrowed her brow in confusion, but didn't ask any questions as she reached to her night table and retrieved her wand. Handing it to him, she started to feel like an idiot when she heard him murmuring a contraceptive charm over her abdomen. He looked up and saw a flash of embarassment cross her face.  
  
He couldn't surpress his chuckle any longer, as he pulled her closer and asked, "Are you telling me that there is a charm that Hermione Granger does not know?"  
  
Her face flushed before she retorted, "I guess Flitwick forgot to teach us that one," then she buried her head in his shoulder with a sigh, mumbling, "Honestly! I didn't think I'd ever have use for one."  
  
"What? Why ever not?" he asked, surprised at her reply.  
  
She whispered in a hoarse voice, "There weren't any boys in school who would have been interested in a bushy haired bookworm with big teeth."  
  
Severus reached over, gently lifting her head and forcing her to meet his eyes as he told her, "Hermione... in case you haven't noticed, you aren't in school any more. And, you haven't had bushy hair or big teeth since fourth year. Furthermore, anybody who can not appreciate you for your intelligence is a damn fool."  
  
He sighed before he continued, "But now, I think I understand something... I always wondered why you didn't... after we were together... I thought it odd that you didn't take any precautions."  
  
A tear slid from the corner of Hermione's eye as she rasped, "I'm sorry."  
  
"I'm not," he kissed her as he continued, "We wouldn't have Samuel, otherwise."  
  
He could feel her smile as her face was still pressed to his chest, and was disappointed when he felt the smile fade a moment later.  
  
"Severus..."  
  
"Hmmm?"  
  
"What if... well, you used MY wand, not your own.Will the charm have worked?"  
  
He smiled as he pressed a kiss to her hair, "I don't see why not, but if you are concerned, I can go get my own wand."  
  
She pulled him back down to the bed as he started to rise, "Maybe you can teach me the charm so I can do it myself next time"  
  
"The charm works best when it's done sooner than later," he began to reply, then paused for a moment as he thought more fully about what she just said. "Next time?", he asked as he quirked an eyebrow.   
  
"Well, then... how about... sooner?" she smiled as she pulled him to her, kissing him desperately as she began touching him in ways that she hadn't done before. 


	26. Friends and Lovers

Author's Note: Not much action here, but it's laying some more groundwork for the future. Enjoy!  
  
Thank you to all of my reviewers! Hugs to each and every one of you! And also to my readers... all questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you'd like to leave a review.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 25: "Friends and Lovers"  
  
After making love for the second time that night, Severus and Hermione had once again fallen asleep in each other's arms.  
  
The next time that Severus woke up, it was nearly dawn and he opened his eyes to find his son nestled between himself and Hermione, suckling contentedly as his mother nourished him. Severus propped himself up on one elbow, his other hand reaching over to caress his son's cheek. Samuel turned away from Hermione for just a moment, his eyes wide as he looked around for the source of the distraction, before grunting in frustration as he began rooting for his mother's breast once more.  
  
"Hmph. Good morning to you too, my son!" Severus smirked as his eyes turned to Hermione, "Rather single-minded, isn't he?."  
  
"He doesn't like to be bothered... he takes after his father," Hermione smiled at him as she added, "Good morning, Severus."  
  
He reached over his son to push back a lock of Hermione's hair, "Yes.... it is." She looked so beautiful laying there like that, even with her hair disheveled and her eyes slightly puffy from lack of sleep.... just the vision of her with their child, and the fact that she was looking back at Severus with a content look in her eyes, was enough to make him want to wake up to this sight every morning.  
  
Samuel soon fell asleep, but they continued to lie there like that until sunrise. Severus and Hermione facing each other, with their sleeping son nestled between them, staring deeply into each other's eyes, occasionally reaching out to each other for a soft touch. Neither of them spoke, they didn't want to break the moment. Neither of them ever wanted to get out of that bed... they each knew that no other morning would ever be quite like this one.  
  
When Hermione eventually sat up and started to lift herself off of the bed, Severus reached up and grabbed her arm, "Where are you going?"  
  
She sighed as she pulled her dressing gown over her nightgown, "I have to get ready for breakfast, Severus. Mum is leaving today, and I don't want to miss my one last meal with her before she goes."  
  
Severus sighed regretfully, "Ah... yes, I nearly forgot," he hesitated a moment before asking, "And your plans for the rest of the day...?"  
  
Hermione smiled mischievously, "We'll have to wait and see."  
  
He shooed her out of bed, ordering her to go take a bath while he watched over their sleeping son. Severus was not looking forward to getting out of her bed. No, he was afraid that the memories of their night together would fade the moment he stepped out of her room. He couldn't remember their first time together, and swore to himself that he damn well would not forget this time! He lay there, staring at his sleeping son, wondering what he had finally done right in his life for the Fates to bless him with this child and the amazing woman who was Samuel's mother.  
  
A minute later, Severus found himself cursing the same Fates, as he heard a knock on the door. Scrambling to find his clothes, he tried to keep his voice calm as he called out, "Who is it?"  
  
"It's Remus!"  
  
Severus fought to hold back a string of swearwords as he took a moment to summon his robes from his room. He didn't usually hesitate to open Hermione's door when she had visitors, but he couldn't very well let anyone see him in Hermione's room half-dressed. "Just a minute," he answered, trying to hide the annoyance in his voice. He pulled his robe on over his night clothes, and ran his fingers through his hair before opening the door.  
  
"What is it, Lupin?" he growled as Remus entered.  
  
Remus looked at him with an amused expression on his face, "Am I... interrupting anything?"  
  
Severus sneered at him, "I'm just spending time with my son while his mother prepares for breakfast," he snapped. It wasn't entirely a lie.  
  
"I see. Well, breakfast... that's why I'm here. I wanted to see if Hermione was going to join us this morning. I just spoke to Elizabeth, and she wants to get off to an early start today so we can scout out a few flats in the area before returning to London."  
  
Severus smirked, "How is Elizabeth this morning? The two of you were looking very.... cozy... when we left you last evening." Before Remus could reply, Severus continued, "Did you... ENJOY the rest of your evening?"  
  
"Ahhh... Severus. I see what you're getting at, but you won't get the werewolf to bite, this time," Remus smirked in return, "But, to answer your question... Yes, Elizabeth and I had a lovely time at the ball, before I escorted her to her rooms and bid her a good evening. I didn't see her again until a few minutes ago when I stopped by to see if she was ready to go to breakfast."  
  
Severus quirked an eyebrow, "I see... very well then, Lupin. I'll tell Hermione that you'll be waiting in the Great Hall. She should be there shortly," he opened the door and gestured for Remus to leave.  
  
After checking on Samuel, who was still sleeping on the bed, nestled between the pillows that Severus had hurriedly propped around him, Severus decided that he should get ready for breakfast as well. He carried his son to the nursery and laid him in the crib on the way to his quarters. He paused for a moment, wondering if he should let Hermione know now that her mother and Remus would be in the Great Hall, waiting on her. He smirked as the vision of her soaking in the bathtub entered his mind. Yes... he should let her know as soon as possible, he decided as he walked through her room and towards her bath.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione entered the Great Hall with Samuel in her arms, trying not to think about Severus. He had surprised her during her bath, and even though they hadn't done anything, the memory of his presence for that brief moment made her cheeks burn. As she approached the staff table, she was paranoid that everybody would look at her and know just what she had been up to with Severus throughout the night and early morning hours, and she would not allow herself to meet anybody's eyes.  
  
As she took her seat at the table, her mother held out her arms to receive her grandson.  
  
"Hermione, dear... are you feeling alright? You look a little flushed."  
  
Hermione nearly choked on her pumpkin juice, "Er... yes, Mum. I was just in a hurry to get here. I was... running late this morning, and was afraid that I might miss you."  
  
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, "I wouldn't have left without saying goodbye."  
  
"I know that, Mum... It's just that... I had hoped to have some time alone with you before you go."  
  
"I've still got plenty of time this morning, perhaps we could go to your rooms for a little while."  
  
Hermione finished her breakfast, and was on her way out of the Great Hall with her mother when Severus entered. It took extreme effort to keep her face impassive as she greeted him in passing with a pleasant, "Good morning, Severus."  
  
He nodded to each of them, "Good morning, Hermione.... Elizabeth." Hermione envied the way he could put on his teacher persona like a mask. She wished that she were as good at keeping the color from rising to her cheeks.  
  
When they reached her dungeon quarters, Hermione put Samuel down for his late-morning nap before joining her mother on the sofa. "I'm so glad you stayed for the week, Mum. I just wish the time hadn't gone by so quickly."  
  
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, "I'm glad I stayed, too. It was wonderful to be around so many people again... but most of all, to be close to you and Samuel."  
  
"And Remus?" Hermione asked.  
  
"Yes... Remus, too. He's been a wonderful friend..."  
  
"Mum?" Hermione interrupted, her brow furrowed as she tried to screw up the courage to ask the question that had been on her mind since the previous evening.  
  
"Hermione? What is it?" Elizabeth asked in concern when she saw the expression on Hermione's face.  
  
"Mum... are you and Remus... MORE than friends?" Hermione asked hesitantly.  
  
Elizabeth reached over to grab her daughter's hand, squeezing it as she smiled nervously at Hermione, "Remus is.... very special to me, Hermione. But no, we're not more than friends. I'm not ready for that just yet."  
  
Hermione looked at her mother and asked, "Do you think you ever will be?"  
  
"Maybe... in time..."   
  
"With Remus?" Hermione interrupted again.  
  
Elizabeth sighed, "Hermione... Remus is a wonderful man, but it's too early for me to consider getting involved...."  
  
"But... do you think, one day?" Hermione's voice sounded hopeful and fearful at the same time. She didn't know what she wanted the answer to be.  
  
"My daughter... still as persistent as ever," Elizabeth laughed, "Fine, Hermione. You know that I could never replace your father... but if you want to know the truth, then I'll tell you... YES, I do hope that, if he is willing to wait, then maybe one day Remus will be more than a friend."  
  
Hermione smiled, "Would that make you happy?"  
  
The dreamy smile that Hermione had seen on her mother's face the previous evening returned as she said, "I think it might."  
  
"If it makes you happy, Mum, then I would be happy for you. And I think Daddy would have been happy for you..."  
  
A guilty look flashed across Elizabeth's face, and she changed the subject, "And what is it that would make YOU happy, Hermione? Or have you already found it?" her mother asked.  
  
Hermione sighed, "I don't know, Mum." Had she found it? "But I'll tell you if I do."  
  
"You mean, WHEN you do... and I know you will!" Elizabeth reached out and hugged her daughter.  
  
*****  
  
When Severus returned a few hours later, he found Hermione staring pensively into the fire. He stepped up behind her and placed a hand on her shoulder. When she turned to him, he could see that she had been crying. His breath hitched as he wondered if it had anything to do with him. She reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling him around to the front of the sofa and patting the empty seat next to her. When he sat down, she leaned back against him and sighed.  
  
"Hermione...?" he asked in concern.  
  
"I'm fine, Severus. Just missing my mother already, even though she has only just left."  
  
"You're mother is a delightful woman..." he stopped as he thought to himself, *just like her daughter*.  
  
Hermione nodded her head and smiled, "I know... I'm very lucky," she took a deep breath, "I just want her to be happy... but I don't know if she ever will let herself..."  
  
"Why not?" Severus asked as he put his arm around her shoulders.  
  
"I saw the way she was looking at Remus last night... I know what she is feeling. But she won't admit it."  
  
"Maybe she's not ready."  
  
"I know... that's what she said. But I don't think that's it."  
  
"Then what, Hermione?" he asked softly.  
  
She sighed, "When I saw them together last night... my gut feeling was that I would be betraying my father's memory if I allowed myself to be happy for them. I just wonder if she is feeling the same way. I don't want her to miss out on something so wonderful, out of some misplaced sense of guilt."  
  
"And do you still feel guilty about it?"  
  
"No... I don't feel guilty anymore. I know that my father would want her to be happy again...." she paused for a moment and sniffled as she continued, "I just hope that she realizes it, too... before it's too late."  
  
"My mother is the lucky one, you know? She had the most wonderful man in the world for 20 years... her soulmate... the first love of her life. And now she might have found that kind of love again with Remus. Some people don't get to experience that even once in a lifetime... and now, she's found it twice."   
  
Severus didn't know that she was wondering to herself if she would ever find that kind of love, but he was wondering the same thing about himself. He never expected, nor wanted, that kind of love. Whatever this was that he had with Hermione... it was wonderful. And, in a way, he did love her. As the mother of his child... as a friend (one of the few he had)... and now, as a lover. But, he never considered that it might be THAT kind of love. No, he knew that he would never find that. Not ever. But for now, he would be content with what he had... for he didn't know how long it would last.  
  
He reached down and gently lifted her face to look at him, "It will all work out for the best, Hermione."  
  
Hermione leaned further in to him, close enough to place a soft kiss on his lips, "Thank you, Severus..."  
  
"For what?" he asked.  
  
She scooted further down into her seat and laid her head against his chest, and closed her eyes as she murmured, "Last night..."  
  
What did she mean by that? Before he could ask, she had fallen asleep curled against his side. He wrapped one arm tightly around her, as his other hand reached up to entwine in her hair. Severus sighed... he would have to ask her about it later.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione awoke hours later to a knock on her door. Severus had gone, and from the sounds of it, he was in the nursery with Samuel. Groggily, she rubbed her eyes as she opened the door. To her surprise, Remus was back. She invited him in, and they took a seat on the sofa.  
  
"Back so soon? I thought you'd be gone all day... didn't you go looking at flats before returning to London?"  
  
Remus smiled mischievously, "It didn't take long to find the right place."  
  
"How wonderful! Remus, will you take me to see it?" Hermione asked excitedly.  
  
"You already have," he grinned at her.  
  
Hermione looked at him in confusion... she couldn't think of any place in the area that she had been to before... unless...  
  
"The cottage?" she gasped.  
  
Remus nodded, "She had wanted to see where you had been living last year. She fell in love with it immediately. Of course, it needs some fixing up, but otherwise...  
  
"It's perfect!" Hermione smiled. She knew that, with Hogsmeade being an entirely wizarding village, there were few places in the surrounding area that were equipped for non-magic folk. The cottage, though, was fully equipped with Muggle technology. The old wizard that she had been renting it from had been married to a muggle, and they had lived there until his wife had passed away a few years ago. He had been trying to talk Hermione into buying the place from him while she lived there, and she had seriously considered it until the day that she had moved back to Hogwarts.  
  
"So, is it all settled then?"  
  
Remus chuckled, "She has made an offer... and if all goes well, then she should be able to move in by summer."  
  
Hermione reached out and hugged Remus, "I'm so happy for you."  
  
Remus pulled back in confusion, "For me?"  
  
Hermione blushed... she hadn't meant to say that. "Remus... I know... how you feel about my mother."  
  
Remus frowned, "Hermione, you're mother and I are..."  
  
"Just friends," she interrupted, "yes, I know... but you want it to be more, don't you?"  
  
"You're mother is very special to me, Hermione..." Remus sighed, "But I don't want to rush anything. You're father..."  
  
Hermione interrupted again, "Would be very pleased to know that my mother has found somebody who makes her happy."  
  
"Do you think so?" he asked nervously.  
  
"I know so." 


	27. Mistakes of the Past

Author's Note: This is a very angsty chapter... you didn't think it'd be smooth sailing for the two of them, did you? That would be a bit boring, wouldn't it?  
  
As always, thank you to my readers and reviewers.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 26 ~ Mistakes of the Past  
  
Hermione and Severus decided that they had better get back to focusing on her studies again... they had quite a few evenings of work to make up for, since Hermione had spent most evenings this past week with her mother. After dinner, Remus volunteered to sit with Samuel, and he took the child to the staff room for a change in atmosphere.  
  
Working together that night, they were more relaxed than ever before. It was all business while they were brewing their latest potion, but the small touches that they had become accustomed to sharing now seemed much more intimate. Regardless, they didn't let the events of the past twenty-four hours disrupt their lesson.  
  
As Hermione finished brewing and bottling her potion, Severus stepped behind her to praise her work.  
  
"Perfectly brewed... as usual," he smiled, "Not that I expected anything less from you, Hermione."  
  
"Thank you, Severus. Coming from you, that means a lot."  
  
Severus sighed, "Hermione... if there's one thing I regret as a professor, it is that I never let you know how much I admired your abilities. So many times I was tempted to say, 'Well done, Miss Granger'... but then, I'd see young Mr. Malfoy and his cronies sneering at you... reminding me of my position. I'm sorry that I never made more of an effort to tell you..."  
  
"I understand, Severus," Hermione interrupted, "Speaking of Malfoy... how is Draco faring these days?"   
  
Lucius Malfoy had been killed in the Final Battle, leaving his wife and son behind. His death was no big loss to those who knew him for what he really was, but Hermione couldn't help but feel sorry for Draco. She knew that he had ultimately rejected the lifestyle that his father had intended for him, which would have been to join the ranks of the Death Eaters. Even so, she knew the death of his father had to be hard on him.  
  
Severus looked sympathetic as he started, "Draco is well.... considering what he has been left to deal with. His mother, on the other hand... she didn't take the death of her husband very well."  
  
"Was Narcissa Malfoy a Death Eater as well?" Hermione asked.  
  
Severus shook his head, "No. She wasn't... but she knew what Lucius was, and she supported him, even if she didn't particularly believe in his ideals."  
  
"Did she... love him?"  
  
"Yes, she did. And he loved her, in his own twisted way. He was not a kind man, but he treated her as if she were his most prized posession. He would never have let her come to harm... she led a very sheltered life as the wife of a Malfoy. Lucius would protect her and give her everything she ever wanted, and now that he's gone, she's literally gone out of her mind in grief. Draco had her admitted to St. Mungo's a few months back."  
  
"Poor Draco..."  
  
Severus smirked at the irony, "Those are two words that I never thought I'd hear coming from your mouth. But, I do agree."  
  
"I spent seven years hoping that I could sway his beliefs. It wasn't easy, trying to change him while not revealing my own position... I was so proud of him when, in the end, he made the right choice. But now, he's alone, dealing with the consequences of his father's affairs," Severus looked morose as he finished speaking.  
  
Hermione turned and slipped her arms around Severus' neck, "You've done all you can for him, Severus."  
  
He looked down into her eyes before leaning in to kiss her softly.  
  
"I only wish I could have done more," he scowled.  
  
She kissed him deeply, whispering after she pulled back, "You're an amazing man, Severus Snape... complicated, but amazing. I'm proud that you are Samuel's father."  
  
Severus was dumbstruck. He had never looked for anybody's approval, but the words that she just spoke meant more to him than he ever would have expected. He leaned into her, returning her kiss as he lifted her into his arms. He carried her through a door that she had never been aware of, leading directly from his private lab to his bedroom. Their kisses grew more passionate as he laid her on his bed and began to undress her.  
  
*****  
  
Severus groaned, "Wherever did you learn such passion?" he asked as he pulled Hermione into his arms. He couldn't believe how intense their lovemaking had been again tonight.  
  
"From you," she grinned.  
  
"Me?"  
  
"Mmm hmm... last night..."  
  
Severus could hardly believe what she was saying. From her nervousness the previous evening, and the incident leading up to teaching her the contraceptive charm, he had figured that she wasn't very experienced, and had an inkling that he may have even been her first... but her statement really brought it home. "Hermione... the night in the Forest... was it... your first time?"  
  
He felt her squirm uncomfortably in her arms, and her cheeks grow warm as she nodded her head into his chest.  
  
Severus kissed her brow, "I'm sorry if I... left you with horrible memories of that night... it should have been more special for you," he rasped.  
  
"It was special, and not at all horrible," she murmured, "not until afterwards..."  
  
"Are you ever going to tell me what really happened?"  
  
Hermione sighed, her voice trembling as she whispered, "You said... you said that... you wanted to forget that it happened."  
  
"Merlin! Hermione, I..." he pulled her tightly into his arms, "I can't imagine how you must have felt. I don't deserve your forgiveness."  
  
"I forgave you a long time ago..."  
  
"I could never make up for hurting you that way..."  
  
Hermione raised her head, propping herself up on her elbow as she looked into his eyes, "Severus... you more than made up for it last night," she smirked, "and this morning, and tonight... by showing me how wonderful it can be. Just don't tell me that you want to forget, again..."  
  
"Never," he stated adamantly before kissing her breathless once again, "I don't ever want to forget the time we spent together this weekend."  
  
"You make it sound so final," she frowned as she pulled away.  
  
"Did you... were you expecting it to continue?" he stammered.  
  
Hermione began to look frantic as she asked, "Why wouldn't I?"  
  
"I just thought..."  
  
"A weekend fling... is that all this was to you?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Severus, if that is all you wanted from me..." she fought back the tears as she gathered up her clothing, "If you'll excuse me, I have to go get our son!"  
  
*****  
  
Hermione stormed out of the room, through the nursery and to her own quarters, not even bothering to dress except to hastily throw her robe on to cover her nudity. When she reached her own room, she slammed her door behind her, taking deep breaths as she leaned back against it. She slid down against the wall, until she was on her knees, dropping her clothes into a heap beside her as she began to sob.  
  
She was still lying there, sobbing, when Remus entered her quarters a little while later. His jovial smile quickly faded as he saw the sight before him.  
  
"Hermione!" he rushed over to her, dropping to his knees and pulling her close with one arm. Samuel was tucked securely into his other arm.  
  
Hermione looked up at him, her eyes red and watery as she trembled in his embrace. "Remus... please... just go."  
  
"I won't leave you alone like this, Hermione. Not until I know what happened to you!"  
  
"Samuel...?" she whispered as she looked at the baby.  
  
"Is sleeping. I'm going to put him in his room, and when I return, you're going to tell me everything..."  
  
Hermione nodded as he reached his hand out to her to help her stand. She followed him into the nursery, kissing her son before Remus gently laid him in the crib. He turned to her, gently placing a hand on her shoulder as he ushered her out of the room. He poured her a glass of water, and rubbed her back as she slowly took a drink.   
  
"Thank you," she said hoarsely.  
  
He smiled gently at her, "Please, Hermione... tell me. I can't help you if you don't let me know what happened."  
  
She sobbed, "Why do we keep repeating the mistakes of the past?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Severus..." she choked, unable to continue.  
  
Remus fumed, "WHAT did he do to you!"  
  
"No, Remus... he didn't do anything to me."  
  
"Then, what? Hermione, I come in here to find you slumped to the floor, sobbing... your clothes in a heap beside you... the only conclusion I can come to..."  
  
"NO! Remus! NO! He didn't! You know he wouldn't!" she cried.  
  
"If you don't tell me otherwise, that would be the only reasonable conclusion I would come to based on what I've seen here tonight!"  
  
Hermione threw her arms around Remus, "He was so wonderful last night... treated me so good. And today... tonight... and now, he wants it to be over..." she was nearly incoherant as she rambled.  
  
"Did you... sleep with him?"  
  
Hermione nodded, "Yes..." she whispered.  
  
"Willingly?"  
  
"YES! Remus... how many times do I have to say it?"  
  
"So it was mutual..." Remus looked at her as she nodded, "But only for the weekend?" she nodded again, "And you wanted it to be more?"  
  
"I don't know what I wanted, Remus! I just didn't expect it to be over already!"  
  
Remus stood, clenching and unclenching his fingers in fury, "I think I need to have a talk with Severus..."  
  
"No, Remus. Please. I don't want you to get involved..."  
  
"I'm already involved...I care too much about you... and your mother... and I owe it to her to watch out for you!"  
  
Hermione collapsed onto her bed, curling up into a fetal position as Remus stormed out of the room.  
  
*****  
  
Severus paced his room wondering what the hell just happened. One minute, they were lying together in the afterglow of their love... the next, she was storming out of the room. How could the best weekend of his life end like this?  
  
Neither brandy nor wine would be strong enough tonight. No, tonight he broke out a brand new bottle of firewhiskey. He was on his fourth round when he heard a pounding on the door, accompanied by an angry voice.  
  
"Snape! Open up!"  
  
"Go to hell, Lupin," he bellowed.  
  
"I'm not going anywhere until we have a talk!"  
  
Severus downed another shot of firewhiskey before stalking over to the door and flinging it open, "Why don't you just kill me now, Remus? I deserve it."  
  
"Not until I get some answers, Snape!" Remus fumed, "What. Did. You. Do?"  
  
Severus sneered, "What did I do? What did I do? Oh, yes... I spent an incredible weekend with the mother of my child..." he chuckled as he shook his head, "But then, I guess you don't want to hear about the sordid details of our bedroom activities?"  
  
Remus stood in front of him, his jaw tight as he clenched his fists.  
  
"Going to hit me, Lupin? Go ahead... I deserve it. Give it your best shot!" Severus slurred as he stepped back and raised his hands in defeat.  
  
Remus took a deep breath, and rather than follow his instincts and punch the smug bastard in front of him, he reached over to the table and grabbed a pitcher of water, throwing it in Severus' face as he bellowed, "Sober up, Snape! I want some answers!"  
  
Severus barely flinched at the cold water that had been flung in his face, "Keep it down, Lupin... my son is asleep in the next room."  
  
Remus drew his wand and cast a silencing charm, "Don't try to avoid the question, Severus. Your son is fine... he won't be disturbed now."  
  
"Very considerate of you, Lupin. But then, you always are. Maybe you could teach me a thing or two, since I seem doomed to repeat my past mistakes..." Severus shrugged.  
  
Remus took a deep breath, speaking more calmly, "Severus... please. I've never seen Hermione so distraught. I can't help her if neither of you will tell me What... the hell... happened."  
  
Severus sighed in defeat, slumping into a chair and rubbing his hands tiredly over his face. He reached into his robes, pulling out a vial of potion and pulling out the stopper, "In a moment, Lupin."   
  
He downed the potion, and Remus observed him sober up almost immediately, "Now then, Severus... tell me..."  
  
"It was a misunderstanding..."  
  
"It takes more than a simple misunderstanding to get Hermione so worked up!"  
  
"I never said 'simple', Lupin" Severus sneered.  
  
Remus growled in frustration before Severus continued, "She thought I was only in it for... what did she call it? Oh yes, a 'weekend fling'."  
  
"And were you?"  
  
"Come off it, Lupin! Hermione is not a whore to be used and cast away! She means a hell of a lot more than that to me!"  
  
"Didn't you tell her?"  
  
"She didn't give me the chance!"  
  
Remus sighed in frustration, "Go talk to her, Severus."  
  
"She'll not want to see me again, I'd wager..."  
  
"Don't be so quick to assume anything about Hermione. Give her some time, if you must... but make sure you talk to her... soon. Or else, it will be too late."  
  
"OUT, Lupin."  
  
Remus stalked to the door, pausing before he opened it, "Don't blow this, Severus. It may be your last chance."  
  
Severus scowled at the door as Remus closed it behind him, and reached for the remainder of his bottle of Firewhiskey. 


	28. Insecurities

Author's Note: There is something screwy going on with my previous chapter. Sometimes, Only the first half of the chapter loads. If you have this problem, please try adding a question mark at the end of the URL to pull up the updated version.  
  
I started a Yahoo group where I plan to post author's notes about my story. If you'd like to join me, to discuss my story or any other HP fanfic, feel free to jump in! The link is on my author's page.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 27 ~ "Insecurities"  
  
By the time Remus returned to her quarters it was nearly midnight, and Hermione had already bathed and dressed for bed. She had done a lot of thinking while soaking in the bath, and realized how irrationally she had acted. She knew, deep down, that Severus would not walk away from her again... so why did she automatically jump to that assumption from a few simple words? When had she become so insecure? She was sitting at her dressing table, brushing out her curls and berating her reflection in the mirror.  
  
"Who are you? The old Hermione Granger never would have done anything so stupid... irrational... unreasonable..." on and on she went, trying to figure out what had become of the girl she used to be.  
  
"Don't be so hard on yourself, Hermione," spoke a gentle voice behind her.  
  
"Remus! I didn't know you were there..."  
  
He approached her and put a hand on her shoulder, "Of course you aren't the girl you used to be, Hermione. You're living the life of a grown woman and a single mother, not a carefree school girl." Remus took her hand and ushered her over to the sofa, where he let her lean against him while they had a heart to heart discussion.  
  
"Remus... I don't know who I am anymore... I..." she broke off as Remus interrupted.  
  
"Hermione, you've had to deal with a lot over the past year. Your life, as you knew it, came to an abrupt halt and your world turned completely upside down. Your home, your family, your friends... nothing is the same this year as it was last year. But, you have overcome so much to get where you are today, and I admire your strength and your courage. So what if you cry? So what if you cope differently now than you did before? And so what if you're a bit insecure at times? You're still the Hermione we all know and love... nothing can change who you REALLY are... loyal friend, adoring daughter, doting mother... you mean so much to so many people, Hermione. Don't belittle yourself."  
  
Hermione was crying again by the time he had finished. Aside from her parents, she had never heard anyone speak of her that way, "Remus..." she began.  
  
"Did I mention, beautiful and brilliant?" he smiled at her.  
  
"Remus..." she tried again.  
  
"And kind and thoughtful,"  
  
"REMUS!" she punched him playfully.  
  
"Yes, Hermione?"  
  
"Thank you," she smiled.  
  
"Ha! Got you to smile, didn't I?"  
  
After a few moments of sitting in silence, Remus sighed, "I talked to Severus..."  
  
Hermione looked away, "I don't want to know..."  
  
"I think you need to talk to him."  
  
"I think we've both said enough."  
  
"Hermione, look at me," Remus tilted her chin up, forcing her to face him, "Tell me... what do you feel for Severus?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"I know that's not true, Hermione. You wouldn't have been with him, otherwise. Now tell me, how do you feel about him?"  
  
"Remus... it's all so complicated. I don't know what I'm feeling. He's the father of my child, and I love him in that respect. He's been kind to me, and I care about him as a friend. And now... I thought it might be turning into something more, but I... I don't know. He made it seem so... so final, as if it were over. Like this weekend was just..." she paused, unable to finish.  
  
"A 'fling'?"  
  
"Is that what he told you?" she whispered.  
  
"No, Hermione. That's what you thought he was saying. But I think... no, I KNOW... you mean more to him than that."  
  
Hermione stood up and walked away as she said, "Remus... I think I want to be alone now."  
  
Remus quietly stood and walked to the door, pausing before he walked out, "If he means anything to you... even if only as Samuel's father... don't give up on him, Hermione. If there's one thing about you that hasn't changed, it's your determination. Hermione Granger does not give up."  
  
*****  
  
Severus closed his eyes and remembered the feel of her in his arms... her soft, warm body curled up next to him in bed... the feel and fragrance of her luxurious curls... the influx of emotions that he had never known possible during their lovemaking. He was convinced that would never feel that again... not with anybody, and certainly never again with Hermione. He should have known it was too good to last. What would a woman like Hermione Granger want with a boorish man like Severus Snape? On the surface, he tried to convince himself that he had always known that she would eventually walk away. But deep down, he had hoped that she was reciprocating the feelings that he was beginning to have for her. Admittedly, he didn't know exactly what it was that he had begun to feel for her, so he refused to acknowledge it... whatever 'it' was.  
  
Severus gave up on refilling his glass, opting instead to drink straight out of the bottle as he sat in front of the fire all night thinking about how stupid he had been. He knew that Hermione had misconstrued what he said, but still blamed himself for being so indelicate with his words to her.  
  
Only moments before she had stormed out, hadn't he promised her that he wouldn't hurt her again? But he did. And he would not allow himself the opportunity to do so again. No, she was gone. And it was probably for the best, since he could see no sense in prolonging the inevitable.  
  
Near dawn, Severus drained the last of the Firewhiskey, trying to push her out of his mind for good.  
  
*****  
  
After tossing and turning for hours in her bed that night while she replayed the events of the evening in her head, Hermione sighed as she realized... it all came back to the night in the forest. Severus had walked away from her once, and she was all too ready to believe that he was going to walk away again. And why shouldn't she expect it? Everybody who had mattered to her had left her at one time or another this past year... first Severus in the forest... then her father... her mother laid up in the hospital for months on end... then Harry and Ron off to Auror training. Remus was her only constant, and she wondered if he might walk away, as well, after putting up with her for so long. She felt guilty even thinking this way... her father didn't choose to leave, and Harry and Ron would be back, eventually. Her mother was moving into her old cottage to be closer to her, and she knew that she could always have faith in Remus.  
  
For the second time that evening, she began to berate herself for her insecurity. She remembered Remus' parting words that evening, "Hermione Granger does not give up." She tried to push his voice out of her mind, burying her head in her pillow as she finally drifted off into a fitful sleep.  
  
*****  
  
The following morning, Severus sat at the staff table, nursing what would have been a hangover if he had slept at all. As it was, he was still trying to sober up. The potion he had taken took care of the inebriation, but didn't touch the worst of the symptoms. Cup after cup of black coffee he drank... he had class in an hour, and needed to rid himself of his pounding headache, if nothing else.  
  
As he left the table, Albus approached him, requesting a meeting in his office. Severus reluctantly complied... after all, there was no sense trying to avoid the Headmaster. Albus would only track him down later, and Severus wanted to get this over with.  
  
"Severus... you don't look well," Albus said after they had situated themselves in his office.  
  
Severus merely growled an incoherant response.  
  
"Should I get somebody to cover your classes this morning?"  
  
"And which incompetent fool would you assign to annihilate my classroom, Albus? If you're going to suggest Lupin, I might as well use a Reductor Curse and get it over with."  
  
Albus chuckled, "If it worries you, Severus, I would ask that your substitute forgo the practical lesson, and give a written assignment for your students to work on in your absence."  
  
Severus groaned, "Very well, Albus. I suppose that I am in no condition to deal with a class full of dunderheads this morning."  
  
"Too much brandy, Severus? That's not like you," Albus raised an eyebrow as he peered over his half-moon spectacles.  
  
"No... the bottle of Ogden's that I polished off just a few hours ago is more my style," Severus retorted sharply.  
  
Albus looked at Severus in concern, "Severus... I can not have a member of my staff showing up inebriated during term. However, I will let it go this time... that is, IF..."  
  
"Ahh... yes... here comes the big 'IF'," Severus hissed, "If what, Albus?"  
  
"If you tell me what drove you to this. This is the second time since the holidays that I've seen you indulge in more than a drink or two. The first time, if I recall correctly, concerned a recent incident with Hermione Granger. Am I correct to assume..."  
  
He didn't get to finish before Severus cut him off, "The delightful Miss Granger.... how perceptive of you, Headmaster. Yes, I drank to her memory last night... however," Severus paused to sneer, "I have the werewolf to thank for the second half of the bottle. I would have forgotten about Miss Granger after the first half if not for his interference."  
  
"What do you mean by 'drank to her memory', Severus? Is Hermione leaving?"  
  
Severus stood and whirled towards the door, "You'll have to excuse me, Albus... I am not feeling well."  
  
As he swept away towards the dungeons, Severus kept looking over his shoulder, hoping that Albus would not follow him. He wasn't interested in discussing this with Albus... he'd already said too much this morning, as well as to Lupin last night.  
  
As he rounded the corner near his quarters, he nearly collided with an individual coming the other direction. Cursing as he stumbled, he looked up with a viscious scowl on his face as he began his diatribe, "Why don't you watch where you're going... imbicile students running through the hallways..." he was startled as he finally realized who was standing in front of him. It was Hermione... he couldn't believe that he had almost berated her for his own negligence.  
  
To cover his own discomfiture, he hurriedly put on his most impassive teacher facade and spoke quietly, "Excuse me, Miss Granger." As he saw the flash of indigantion in her eyes, he berated himself once again. Why did he revert to calling her "Miss Granger"? Damn that intractable tongue of his. When would he ever learn?  
  
He was barely inside his quarters when he realize that he had neglected to greet his own son in his haste to get away from Hermione.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was on her way to breakfast, determined to make the best of a bad situation. She would find a way to deal with Severus. Even if it was over between them now, they still had a son to consider, as well as her Potions studies. It didn't take her long to find him, as he rounded a corner in the dungeons and nearly knocked her over in his haste. She stood there, trying to find the words to ask him for a few moments to talk in private, but before she could, he had reverted to 'teacher mode' and was calling her "Miss Granger" again. Furthermore, he didn't even acknowledge his son's presence!  
  
*Fine, if that's the way he wants it to be* Hermione thought to herself.  
  
"Not at all, Professor Snape," she retorted before veering around him and continuing her way to the Great Hall. Damn him! How could she deal with him on a daily basis if he was determined to resume a distant teacher/student relationship with her? And more importantly, how would it affect Samuel if they could not work out their differences?  
  
Hermione had little appetite as she sat at the table, merely picking at her food as she nibbled on the crust of her toast and absently sipped her coffee. She couldn't take this anymore. Rising out of her seat, she propped Samuel up on her shoulder and rushed out through the side passage behind the staff table. As she exited the passage into the corridor, she encountered the Headmaster.  
  
"Good morning, Professor Dumbledore," she said quietly in passing. He returned the greeting and looked at her questioningly as she passed, "Hermione? Is anything wrong?"  
  
She whirled around to face him, panic in her eyes. She hoped that he had not learned the details of her weekend with Severus and wasn't looking forward to talking about it with him... but as long as he was here, she did have something important that she knew she would have to discuss with him.  
  
"Professor Dumbledore... do you have a moment? I would like to discuss my apprenticeship."  
  
"Of course, Hermione!" smiling as he looked at Samuel, he added, "Would my office be inconvenient at this time?"  
  
Hermione nodded, "If you don't mind, Samuel will be ready for a nap soon."  
  
She invited him to her quarters, and offered him tea as they sat down at her small table.  
  
"What is on your mind, Hermione?" he looked at her sadly, as if he expected what she was about to say.  
  
"Professor Dumbledore... I don't know if... if I need to continue studying with Severus... I..." she choked as she tried to come up with a reasonable explanation. She didn't want him to know her reasons. "I am ahead in the number of potions required at this point, and I think doing an independent study for the rest of the term may work out better for me. So I can spend more time with Samuel."  
  
"I see. Does Severus know?"  
  
"I haven't told him... yet..." she murmured "I wanted to discuss it with you, first."  
  
"Very well, Hermione. We can call a meeting with Severus this evening in my office. I don't see any reason why you should not do an independant study, seeing as Potions was only temporary to begin with. May I ask, what do you plan to research for your independant study?"  
  
The question was unexpected, but not surprising. She should have thought about that before using independant study as an excuse. She would have to do some quick thinking. For some reason, her mind drifted to Remus, and the answer came to her, "I think I'd like to research.... a cure for lycanthropy."  
  
The Headmaster's eyes began to twinkle as he smiled at her, "Very good, Hermione! With your exceptional mind, and from what Severus has told me about your abilities in Potions, I wouldn't be surprised if your theories eventually lead to the discovery of a cure!"  
  
Hermione smiled at his confidence in her, even as she tried not to blanch at the mention of Severus. How would she ever be able to inform him of her decision if he refused to face her?  
  
*****  
  
As Albus returned to his office that morning, he couldn't keep from smiling. He hoped that, unbeknownst to Hermione, her choice of research may just bring her closer to Severus than she had anticipated. 


	29. Independent Studies

Author's Note: Hermione chose to do an independent study to get away from Severus... but will her choice of reasearch subject pull them closer together? Read and find out.  
  
I started a Yahoo group where I plan to post author's notes about my story. If you'd like to join me, to discuss my story or any other HP fanfic, feel free to jump in! The link is on my author's page.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 28 ~ Independent Studies  
  
Hermione had hoped to catch Severus that afternoon, and tell him about her decision. But she never did find him. During his usual free period, there was nobody in his office, and when she knocked on his classroom door, she was surprised to find Remus straightening up the desk.  
  
"Remus? What are you doing here?"  
  
He smiled, "Albus asked me to cover Severus' first class this morning."  
  
"What about your own class?"  
  
"Albus stepped in for me," he chuckled, "I daresay he's a rather qualified substitute, wouldn't you agree? Only, I don't understand why he didn't just take the Potions class today. Then again, who really understands Albus Dumbledore?"  
  
Hermione didn't answer the question, asking instead, "Is Severus ill?"  
  
"I'm sorry, Hermione. That is his personal business. Besides, I don't know..."  
  
"I think you do, Remus. Does it have anything to do with last night?"  
  
He sighed, "Tell me, Hermione... what do you think?"  
  
She avoided the question, "Please, Remus. If you see Severus... oh, nevermind. I guess I'll tell him myself at the meeting tonight."  
  
"Meeting?"  
  
Hermione looked at Remus, her eyes full of sadness, "I've decided not to work with Severus any longer..."  
  
"But, Hermione! Your studies..."  
  
"Not to worry, Remus. I'm not giving up Potions all together. I've just opted to forgo the practical lessons and do an independent study."  
  
"Is that what you want?"  
  
"It's what I need to do, Remus. Please... don't ask anymore questions. You'll get all the answers if you'd like to accompany me to the meeting tonight."  
  
"I'll be there, Hermione," he stepped forward and put an arm around her shoulder, "I'll always be there, if you need me. Never forget that."  
  
*****  
  
Severus had remained holed up in his quarters for the rest of the day. Having nothing to do was driving him mad, and he was sorely tempted to spy on Lupin in the Potions classroom. It was all he could do to resist the temptation, and he opted instead to plan for that evening's lesson with Hermione.  
  
He sighed, wondering how it would be possible to continue working with her. So far, they hadn't had any trouble putting aside their personal relationship during their sessions... but they had never before had a falling out quite like this one. It never even crossed his mind that she may not want to continue working side by side with him, until Albus Dumbledore called him by floo that evening, requesting that he report to his office immediately after dinner.  
  
Severus didn't attend dinner, as he had no appetite. Even if he hadn't tossed back an entire bottle of liquor overnight, he doubted that he would have been able to eat. He paced the corridors during the evening meal, trying to occupy himself until the time that he needed to report to the Headmaster.  
  
What could the old man want, now? Severus hoped that he didn't intend to pick up where they left off with their morning discussion. He stalked up to the Headmaster's office, deciding to wait there for the duration of dinner. He was surprised when he entered to find Albus already there.  
  
"Severus! You're early!"  
  
Severus groaned, "I just want to get this over with. What do you want from me, Albus?" he asked wearily.  
  
"In due time, Severus. We'll begin when Hermione arrives."  
  
"Hermi... er... Miss Granger is attending as well?" he tried to hide the emotion he felt rising at the thought of her presence.  
  
"Didn't she talk to you this afternoon, Severus?"  
  
"No, Albus. I haven't seen Herm... Miss Granger... since before breakfast this morning. She wasn't quite in the mood to talk to me then."  
  
"I see..." Albus raised an eyebrow, "Severus..." he didn't get to finish, as he was interrupted by a light knock on the door, "Come in, Miss Granger," he called.  
  
Severus stiffened as he remained facing Albus' desk. He couldn't bear to turn around and meet her eyes.  
  
"Ah... Hello Remus!"   
  
Severus whirled around to glare at the werewolf when he heard Albus address him. What was HE doing here?  
  
"Lupin." he greeted him icily.  
  
"Good evening Severus. You should be pleased to know that I left your classroom intact," Remus smiled.  
  
Severus grunted. He wouldn't believe it until he could see for himself.  
  
"Can we get this over with, Albus," he replied testily.  
  
"Of course. Hermione, did you want to begin?"  
  
Severus finally faced Hermione, a feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. This was about Hermione? He began to fear what she was about to say.  
  
"Er... yes, Professor Dumbledore," Hermione replied before she turned towards Severus, not looking at him as she stared absently at her hands.   
  
"Professor Snape," she began, "I think it would be for the best if I... if I..." she looked up at him.  
  
"If you WHAT, Miss Granger," he hissed.  
  
*Here it comes... She's going to tell me that she is leaving* he thought to himself as he looked away... he couldn't bear to watch her as she prepared to tell him that she would be taking her son and moving out.  
  
"I am going to begin an independant study, rather than continue with our practical lessons."  
  
He thought he had heard her wrong... "An independant study?"  
  
"Yes... I think it's for the best."  
  
Severus closed his eyes for a brief moment... a great weight had just lifted from his shoulders. She wasn't going to leave! He breathed a sigh of relief as he responded, "I agree."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione felt the threat of tears burning behind her eyelids. She should have known that he wouldn't object to her abandoning their practical lessons. On top of that, he sounded relieved to be rid of her!  
  
"If that is all, Professor Dumbledore, I must be getting back to my son."  
  
"Very well, Hermione. Severus and I will discuss arrangements for you to have access to any materials you may need to begin your project. You should be able to begin tomorrow, if you wish."  
  
"Thank you, Professor," she replied in a hoarse voice as she turned and rushed out of the office.  
  
Remus was not far behind as she raced through the corridors, hurrying to return to her quarters. All she wanted was to take comfort from holding her son in her arms, and she hoped that Remus would respect that she was in no mood to talk about Severus.  
  
"Hermione... wait!"  
  
"I'm fine, Remus..." she paused as a tear spilled down her cheek, "No... I'm not... How can I be?" she reached out and fell into his arms.  
  
"I'm sorry, Remus. I didn't mean to be short with you. Please, come in. I really do not want to be alone."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
She nodded her head as she led him into her quarters. She hurriedly dried her tears... Ginny was in the nursery watching Samuel, and she didn't want her friend to see her like this.  
  
"Hermione... why don't you go freshen up? I will inform Ginny that you've returned, and relieve her for the evening."  
  
Hermione sniffed as she nodded in agreement. After splashing some cool water on her face to wash away the tearstains, she entered her room to find Remus entertaining Samuel, lying on the bed with the child as he tickled him gently, and Samuel was cooing delightedly at him in return. Hermione felt an ache of regret for Remus. What a shame that this wonderful human being had never had an opportunity to have a family of his own. For the moment, it made her own problems with Severus seem very insignificant. She smiled as she approached from the opposite side of the bed and sat gently on the edge. She smiled at Remus, "You're a natural at this."  
  
Remus smiled at her with a bemused grin, "I am?"  
  
She nodded, "Remus... you've got a way with Samuel... and with ME. And I've seen how you've been with Harry in the past. You would have made a wonderful father, Remus."  
  
Remus sighed, "I already feel as though I am one, Hermione," he looked at her intensely, "Hermione... I know I could never take the place of your real father, but I have come to love you like a daughter. And Samuel..." he paused as he smiled down at the child, "is like a grandson."  
  
Hermione laughed, "And we love you too, 'Grandpa'!" she teased.  
  
"Bah!" he chuckled as he shook his head, "I could just imagine what Sirius would say if he were here to hear you call me that! He always did call me an 'old man'."  
  
"You still miss him, don't you?" she asked sadly.  
  
"Not a day goes by that I don't wish he was here, Hermione. And James, too..." he looked back down at Samuel, "I remember James with Harry at this age..." he sighed, "Hermione, don't take a single minute for granted. Whatever is going on with you and Severus, don't let it interfere with your son. You never know what your future may hold."  
  
*****  
  
Severus was growing impatient as he waited for Albus to excuse him for the evening. He wanted to get back to his quarters, and maybe even try to see his son, if Hermione would allow it. He hadn't spent a moment with Samuel since the previous afternoon, and was missing him terribly.  
  
"Albus, can we just get on with it?"  
  
"Certainly, Severus. Now, would you like to know what Miss Granger has chosen as her research subject?"  
  
"It does not concern me, Albus. They call it 'independent study' for a reason."  
  
Albus chuckled, "It does concern you, Severus. More than you know."  
  
"What are you getting at?"  
  
"Hermione has chosen to research a cure for lycanthropy."  
  
Severus sneered, "Ah, yes. To cure her mother's werewolf lover..."  
  
"Now Severus... that's uncalled for."  
  
"Forgive me, Albus... I should not bring Elizabeth Granger into this..."  
  
Albus sighed, "Severus. Think about this for a minute. You've been researching a cure for many years... having partial success with the Wolfsbane Potion. Between Hermione's brilliant mind and your own, I think there's a very good chance for you to finally succeed in finding a cure."  
  
Severus ran a hand wearily over his face, "She is taking this course of action in order to avoid me, Albus. The last thing she will want is my interference."  
  
"Perhaps, Severus. However... you have taken extensive notes on the subject, have you not?"  
  
"Are you suggesting I hand all of my years of research over to an apprentice?"  
  
"This is not just any apprentice, Severus. This is Hermione Granger."  
  
"And...?" Severus hissed.  
  
"And," Albus peered over his glasses to meet Severus' eyes, "I have a feeling that you do not wish to cease tutoring Hermione, and I know that she enjoys working with you. Make peace with her, Severus. Mend your relationship..."  
  
"There is no relationship..."  
  
"Please, allow me to finish, Severus!" Albus held up his hand to silence him, "Your relationship as the father of her son, Severus. You don't think that Hermione would want you out of your son's life, do you?"  
  
"I don't presume to know what Hermione wants...."  
  
"I think you know what you need to do, Severus."  
  
Severus nodded as he rose to his feet, "Thank you, Albus," he said hoarsely as he left the office.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was sitting by the fire, reading through one of her textbooks, hoping to find some material to use as a starting point for her research. She knew that Severus would be able to point her in the right direction, but she was not about to approach him. No, he had made it clear that he was glad to be rid of her.  
  
She was surprised late that evening when she heard footsteps in the nursery. She quietly approached the room and cracked the door open. Severus was leaning over the crib, stroking their sleeping son's head. She could hear him murmuring, but couldn't quite make out the words he was speaking. She had been trying all day to drive his memory out of her heart, but seeing him like this with their son made all of those tender feelings come rushing back. She knew that Remus was right... she had to make things right again, for Samuel's sake.  
  
"Hello, Severus," she spoke quietly.  
  
"Miss Granger," he nodded in her direction, without looking at her.  
  
"Severus... please... for Samuel's sake... don't..."  
  
"I am sorry... Hermione," he still wouldn't look at her, "You're right... we need to get along, for Samuel's sake."  
  
"I'm sorry for last night," she whispered quietly.  
  
"Don't be," he finally looked at her. "Hermione... I... if you would like, I can help you to get started with your research."  
  
"Severus... would you like to come in... for a cup of tea?"  
  
He nodded, "Yes. That would be nice."  
  
It had been more than a full week since their last late night fireside chat, and Hermione didn't realize how much she had missed it.  
  
"Severus?" Hermione asked a few minutes later, breaking the uncomfortable silence between them.  
  
"What is it, Hermione?" Severus leaned back as he finished the dregs of his tea.  
  
"Do you think that I should begin by studing the properties of the Wolfsbane Potion? Or should I start from scratch, working on my own theories?"  
  
"The Wolfsbane would give you a good place to start, but I would suggest that you begin work on your own theories as well, and then we could compare notes... that is, if you would like to look at my notes leading up to the discovery of the Wolfsbane."  
  
"Oh, Severus! Could I really? I know we've discussed the properties of the potion, and you've even taught me to brew it... but your theories leading up to the discovery would be inspiring!" Hermione couldn't hide her enthusiasm at the prospect of getting a look at his research.   
  
She was relieved when Severus smiled slightly at her enthusiasm, "Hermione... I can recommend a list of books that you can find in the library as well."  
  
"Thank you, Severus."  
  
"My pleasure, Hermione," he replied as he rose out of his seat and swept out of the room. Hermione assumed that he would be retiring for the night, and was surprised to see him return only minutes later with a stack of papers, as well as a number of textbooks.  
  
"What is all of this?" she asked.  
  
"You won't find these volumes in the school library, Hermione. These are from my private collection. Please, make use of them for as long as you need," he paused and pointed to the stack of papers, "and some notes that you may find useful."  
  
Hermione picked up a few pieces of parchment and began skimming over the materials. She skimmed over the first four pages before she gasped, "This is absolutely brilliant, Severus!"  
  
He couldn't help but pick up her enthusiasm, as he leaned over to see what she was reading. They spent the rest of the evening in her room, poring over the documents and enjoying their intellectual discussions once again.  
  
*****  
  
Each evening after his rounds, Severus would join Hermione in her quarters to discuss her progress with her independent study. For the first week or so, it always started the same. They would sit by the fire, tense and ill at ease, until eventually one of them would begin discussing the research. In the throes of intellectual passion, they forgot all about their differences. Nothing else existed outside of the two brilliant minds gathered together, working towards a common goal. At the end of the evening, it was back to awkward goodbyes, as Severus would excuse himself to return to his rooms.  
  
When it came to Samuel, they stuck to the pact that they had made to get along for their son's sake. Eventually, their awkwardness waned, and they were enjoying each other's company as they had done in the early days after Samuel's birth. All in all, Severus and Hermione were moving on, as parents and as colleagues. But at night, when they each retired to their respective beds, neither of them could sleep. Their weekend of passion would haunt their dreams forever. 


	30. Carry The Memories With You

Author's Notes: Just a reminder that you can find a link to my Yahoo group in my profile here at fanfiction.net. Feel free to jump in to discuss HP fanfic (mine, or others), or just to listen to my ramblings.   
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.   
  
*****  
  
Chapter 29 ~ "Carry The Memories With You"  
  
Hermione and Severus continued working diligently on her project every evening. Slowly but surely, as the weeks went by, they were continuing to mend their relationship... as friends. Neither of them would acknowledge their true feelings, fearing that if they had another row, it would be impossible to work it out.  
  
Severus continued to supply Hermione with new books, documents, and ideas for her research. They had taken to sitting on the hearth rug in front of the fireplace, papers and open textbooks spread wide on the floor in front of them, as they discussed Hermione's notes and compared them to Severus' own years of research. The Potions Master loved to just sit and watch Hermione deep in thought, biting her lip as she concentrated on her work... her expression eventually changing to a brilliant smile as she grasped new concepts and pieced bits of their information together to come up with new theories.  
  
Severus took satisfaction in the knowledge that HE was the one making her smile now. He had envied Remus for it for so long, not knowing how to make her smile that way himself. At the end of the night he would return to his quarters, smiling in satisfaction... he should have known that books and academic research would do the trick.  
  
For all of Hermiones new theories, they both knew that they were nowhere close to finding the lycanthropy cure. Severus was sure that it would take a number of years of further research... but he couldn't object to that. He could go on forever with her like this. When he retired to his room at night, he would lay in his bed, marvelling at the fact that, less than a year ago, he never would have imagined a life with Hermione Granger in it... now, he could not imagine life without her companionship.  
  
*****  
  
One morning in early spring, Remus had invited Hermione for tea in his quarters.   
  
"I have exciting news, Hermione!" he smiled with a glint in his eye, "The renovations on the cottage are nearly complete! Your mother will be able to move in by the end of the month... whenever she's ready!"  
  
Hermione squealed in delight and the two of them spent the morning making plans to go to London and help with the move.  
  
She couldn't keep from smiling as she walked back to the dungeons that afternoon. When she encountered Severus outside of his office, he looked at her with a bemused expression. He reached out to take Samuel into his arms, quirking an eyebrow at her in question.  
  
Hermione giggled, "My mother is coming! I mean... she is moving in! Of course, you know that... but she is coming in just a few weeks!"  
  
He smiled at her, "I'm happy for you, Hermione. When will she be moving in?"  
  
Hermione frowned, "Oh, I don't know for sure. I'll have to ask when I owl her and let her know I'm coming to London..."  
  
"You're going to London?" Severus frowned.  
  
"Yes. I... I need to go home one last time. And she'll need help packing... I can't let her do it alone."  
  
Severus was stunned. He knew it was selfish, but he didn't want her to go. He cleared his throat and asked, "Will you be taking Samuel?"   
  
"Er... yes." Hermione frowned, shaking her head, "I'll be gone for at least a week or two... I can't leave Samuel that long!"  
  
Severus tried to maintain an impassive expression as she told him how long they would be gone. He couldn't imagine them being away from him... not even for a single day, let alone a couple of weeks! He forced himself to respond as he passed Samuel back inot Hermione's arms, "Let me know when you will be going." And with that, he whirled around and stalked out of the dungeons, hoping that Hermione couldn't see his disappointment.  
  
*****  
  
By the weekend before Easter, Hermione learned that her mother had put all of her affairs in order, and wanted to move in over the holiday break. Hermione had decided to go to London for the week prior to the holiday to help her mother pack up her belongings. Remus would join them at the end of the week, after the students left for their break.  
  
That Sunday, Severus accompanied Hermione to Hogsmeade to see her and Samuel off on the train. That morning, he had spent every spare moment he had with his son, even skipping breakfast to squeeze in an extra hour with him. He had not been separated from Samuel since the first week after the Christmas holiday, and he was not looking forward to spending time away from him. When it was time to board the train, he held Samuel tight to him for a final goodbye. He looked at Hermione, "Take care of my son..."  
  
"I will, Severus..." she smiled nervously. How was she to say goodbye to him? A handshake? Too formal. A hug? Too personal. She sighed to herself as she reached out to take their son into her arms, and was surprised as Severus leaned in to place a firm kiss to her temple.  
  
"Have a safe trip, Hermione."  
  
She nodded as she replied, "See you on Saturday." As she boarded the train, she afforded herself one last glance behind her, she opened her mouth to say something to Severus, but could not form the words that she was thinking, *I'll miss you.*  
  
*****  
  
"Good afternoon, Severus. I take it Hermione and Samuel are well on their way to London by now?" Albus asked as Severus entered the school.  
  
Severus nodded solemnly, "They are, Albus."  
  
Albus reached out and clapped Severus on the shoulder, "Severus... they'll be back before you know it."  
  
"I should have kept Samuel here, Albus. Certainly, Hermione will be of no help to her mother if she's got her hands full with him for two weeks?"  
  
"If it worries you, Severus, perhaps you could join them?"  
  
Severus sneered, "And leave my class in Lupin's hands for an entire week?"  
  
"Well, then..." Albus chuckled, his eyes twinkling as he continued, "Perhaps, after Friday, when the students leave, you could..."  
  
"I appreciate what you are trying to do, Albus. But I doubt Hermione would appreciate my interference."  
  
"I don't think she would mind, at all," spoke a voice from behind them.  
  
Severus whirled around, "Lupin. Must you continually make a habit of butting into other people's affairs?"  
  
"Affair? Is that what you're calling it now, Severus?" Remus smirked.  
  
"Lupin..." he snapped, but Albus intervened.  
  
"Come now, gentlemen... that's quite enough," his eyes twinkling, he turned to Severus, "If you plan to accompany Remus to London next weekend, you'll need to put your differences aside."  
  
"I think I'll not be going. I might rather enjoy a couple days of peace and quiet after the students leave."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione had taken the train to King's Cross, where a cab was waiting for her to drive her home.  
  
Home. Hermione sighed. She hadn't thought of her old house as 'home' for a long time... she hadn't even been back there at all since her father's death. Going now, she realized that her stay would be bittersweet. One last time, she would relive the memories of her childhood. She smiled at the thought of her bedroom... was it still the same? She was startled out of her reverie when they finally pulled up in front of the house.  
  
After the driver dropped her off, helping her with her trunk and leaving her at the door, Hermione stood on the porch for a few minutes, smiling at the familiarity of the flower gardens, the trees, the hedges. She could close her eyes and see her father lovingly tending the garden, pruning the rosebushes and planting the spring flower bulbs. Sighing, she opened her eyes and faced the front door, hesitantly reaching for the knob. It was unlocked. As she stepped into the foyer, a tearful smile spread across her face. That warm, secure familiarity of her childhood home was still there. She only wished that she would enter the kitchen to see her father sitting at the table, newspaper spread before him as he sipped his coffee. She held back a soft sob as she acknowledged that he would not be there. How could she stay in this house with his memories? Just as she was tempted to turn and run away, her mother appeared.  
  
"Oh, Mum!" she sobbed.  
  
Elizabeth rushed forwards, sweeping Hermione and Samuel into her arms. They stood there, crying on each other's shoulder as they comforted one another.  
  
Her mother led her into the living room, where they sat on the sofa, sipping tea as Hermione adjusted to being back in her childhood home. Her mother hadn't packed much from this room, and very little had changed. Everything that made that house a home for so many years was still in the same place. Hermione smiled as her eyes glanced over the many family photos on the mantle. She sighed, "Mum, how do you do it?"  
  
"Do what, Hermione?"  
  
"How do you stay in this house all alone with these memories? And now, how can you leave them all behind?"  
  
"It wasn't easy at first," Elizabeth smiled at her gently. "Memories are all I have left of your father, Hermione. Moving away was one of the hardest decisions I've had to make in my life. But your father's memory is not just alive in this house... he's here," she placed a hand over her heart, "and that is something I can carry with me when I go."  
  
Hermione and her mother had spent the rest of the week packing Elizabeth's belongings. She would have new furnishings in the cottage, so only had personal effects to pack up. Every picture, every memento held a lifetime of memories. They shed many tears that week, reliving Hermione's childhood and sharing fond memories of the happy family they had been when her father was alive. The hardest day of the week had been the day that they had packed up all of her father's belongings. All of his clothing would be given to charity, but it was something that Elizabeth had not been able to bring herself to do alone. There were many items that they would not part with. Among them was her father's pocketwatch. It had been handed down through generations of Granger men, and as Elizabeth gently packed it away with her own jewelry, Hermione wondered if one day it would belong to Samuel.  
  
Hermione left the packing of her room for last. Most of her childhood mementos were already in her quarters at Hogwarts, so she had nothing much, besides a number of old books and some pictures of her own, to take with her. Leafing through a photo album, she found her favorite picture... Hermione as a toddler, curled up against her father's chest with a blanket in one hand and her favorite plush bunny clutched in the other hand. She put the album down, and walked to her closet. Reaching up to the shelf, she found the plush bunny rabbit, wrapped up in that old blanket and smiled.   
  
Samuel was laying in her old bassinet that her mother had stored in the attic for all of these years, one of the few pieces of furniture that would go with Elizabeth to the cottage. Hermione walked over to place the bunny and blanket snuggly beside the sleeping child. Maybe one day he would curl up on his own father's chest with them as she had done so many years ago.  
  
A little while later, Hermione had finished packing her personal belongings and curled up in her bed. She fell asleep dreaming of the picture of her and her father. The image morphed into a picture of Samuel and Severus. She smiled in her sleep as she whispered, "Severus..."  
  
It would not be the last time she murmured his name in her sleep that night.  
  
*****  
  
By mid-week, Severus was going mad missing his son.... he couldn't help but wonder how Samuel was faring. Did Samuel miss him? He smiled as he remembered the way Samuel's eyes had recently begun to light up in recognition every time Severus picked him up... his smiles of delight as Severus elegant fingers would playfully tickle him... the way he cooed in response to his father's voice. How much will his son have grown by the time he would see him again next week? He thought about Samuel's recent attempts to roll himself over. Would he finally do it when Severus wasn't around to witness it? He hoped not.  
  
He sighed as he realized that he was missing Hermione, as well. He had tried to keep himself busy, but kept thinking of the past nights as he had sat with her, listening to her talk about her independent study. Hermione's passion in her research had astounded him. He had always known that the girl was brilliant, but her theories on lycanthropy these past weeks surpassed any expectations he had of her. He tried to pass the time by focusing on digging up new material for her research, but he kept seeing images of her face... the way her eyes would light up when she had a new theory, her smile when he praised her work.  
  
The nights were the hardest for him... he was having trouble sleeping again. Nearly every night, he had found himself wandering around the nursery at night, closing his eyes as he inhaled the sweet baby smell of the room. He tried to resist the temptation to enter Hermione's room. Seeing her quarters without her in them, smelling her scent in the air... it would be too much. But by Friday, he couldn't resist. He entered her quarters on the pretext of looking over her research, but the minute he entered the room, her absence hit him harder than it had all week. He sat in front of the fireplace, closing his eyes and imagining her sitting next to him. Suddenly, he thought he heard her voice whispering, "Severus..."  
  
His eyes flew open and darted around the room. Of course, there was nobody there. He shook his head and chastised himself for foolishly thinking that she was there. With a sigh, he returned to his quarters and tried to get some sleep. Just as he was drifting off, he heard it again.  
  
"Severus..."  
  
This time, it was not the voice of his friend, it was the breathy whisper of his lover. He tried to force it out of his mind, but even after he fell asleep the voice continued to haunt him. In his dreams, he could see her face. Her loving smile as she held their son... her eyes dancing in the firelight as they sat together each evening... her tears the night that they danced... and her dreamy expression as she lay in his arms after making love.  
  
He dreamed of holding her like that again, touching her... kissing her...  
  
It was nearly dawn when he woke up in a cold sweat. He had been dreaming of her for a long time, but this night, it was so much more intense... it had seemed so real. Even when he opened his eyes, there was one image that he couldn't get out of his mind... the image of holding her as they made love....  
  
*Love* Severus shook his head as he thought, *What IS love?* He spent the rest of the night trying to answer that question. By morning, he knew what he had to do.  
  
Saturday afternoon, the students were heading for home for the Easter holiday, and Remus was preparing to leave for London. Severus caught up to him at the main entrance and approached him.  
  
"Lupin!" he called.  
  
"Severus... come to see me off?" Remus smirked.  
  
"I'm coming with you." 


	31. Don't Let Go

Author's Notes: Just a reminder that you can find a link to my Yahoo group in my profile here at fanfiction.net. Feel free to jump in to discuss HP fanfic (mine, your own, or others), or just to listen to my ramblings.   
  
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers for inspiring me to continue! Hugs and love to all of you!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.   
  
*****  
  
Chapter 30 ~ Don't Let Go  
  
Saturday morning, Hermione had decided that there was not much more that she could do to help prepare for her mother's move. They had packed all but the essentials, and she knew that she could not bear another week away from Hogwarts... away from Severus. Remus would be arriving this afternoon, and she had made up her mind to go back to Hogwarts on Sunday, hoping that her mother and Remus would not mind her leaving them to have spend Easter alone.  
  
That early spring morning was clear and bright. She took Samuel out to the back yard, to sit in the swing under her favorite tree for the last time. As the sun rose higher in the sky, she spread a blanket out on the grass and lay Samuel on it to enjoy the warmth of the rays of sunlight. She sat on the blanket next to him, smiling as she encouraged his attempts to roll over.  
  
"Just a little bit further," she encouraged him, just as he place his fist under his chest and pushed hard. He had done it! She turned him over to his stomach, just to see if he could do it again. Again and again, Samuel propelled himself onto his back. Just as she was leaning in to praise him, a shadow fell over them and she heard an amused voice behind her.  
  
"I see he has your knack for learning..."   
  
Hermione whirled around, and found Severus standing only a few feet behind them, smiling at his son.  
  
"Severus... what are you doing here?"  
  
He frowned, "Is it a problem?"  
  
"NO! No... not at all," she smiled in reassurance, "I just wasn't expecting you..."  
  
"I couldn't stay away," he kneeled down to smile at his son, "and I'm glad I didn't... I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." He was not longer looking at Samuel... he was staring deeply into Hermione's eyes.  
  
Looking back into his eyes, Hermione felt like she was being put into a trance. He had never looked at her quite like this before. Unsure of what that look meant, she forced herself to break away, smiling down at her son before looking back at Severus. "I'm glad you're here."  
  
*****  
  
Severus and Remus had apparated into an alley a few blocks away from the Granger home. When they arrived at the house a short while later, they were greeted by Elizabeth at the front door. Severus stood back as Remus stepped in to give Elizabeth a hug. He cleared his throat and Remus backed away, smiling as Elizabeth finally realized that the werewolf hadn't come alone.  
  
"Severus! What a delightful surprise!"  
  
Even more surprising to Severus was that she stepped forward to embrace him as if he were an old friend. Hesitantly, he reached one hand up to pat her shoulder in return.   
  
"A pleasure to see you again, Elizabeth," his replied as his eyes darted around the foyer, "Where is..." he paused, not wanting it to seem to obvious that he was eager to see Hermione, "my son?"  
  
Elizabeth smiled, "In the back yard. Hermione wanted to let him get some fresh air now that the weather is warming up." She showed him through the kitchen to the back door, and he walked outside alone, pausing as he closed the door behind him. His breath caught in his throat as he saw her there, basking in the sunlight with their son. The rays of sun created a halo effect around the crown of Hermione's head, revealing highlights of reddish gold in her hair, and her smile was radiant as she encouraged her son in his attempts to roll over. Slowly, he crept up behind them, just as Samuel finally pushed himself hard with his fist, propelling himself from his stomach to his back. Over and over again, he watched as Hermione would roll the child onto his stomach, only for Samuel to roll back over onto his back. He couldn't surpress a chuckle as he noticed the look on his son's face... his eyes dancing so much like Hermione's did every time she learned something new.  
  
He finally spoke just as he was close enough to cast a shadow over them, and was taken aback for a moment at Hermione's reaction. Wasn't she happy to see him? Maybe it had been a mistake to come here.  
  
As she reassured him with a smile, he kneeled down to smile at his son, "I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." Severus couldn't keep his eyes from locking with Hermione's as he spoke not only of his son, but of Hermione as well. He didn't want to miss another moment with her.  
  
He watched as she lovingly glanced at Samuel, and his heart skipped a beat as she turned back to him and said, "I'm glad you're here."  
  
Severus allowed himself to smile briefly before he stood and held his hand out to her, helping her to her feet. Their eyes met again for a moment before she asked, "Would you like to go inside? I should get Samuel down for a nap..."  
  
He nodded, "May I...?" he asked as he stooped to scoop his child into his arms, Samuel cooing back at him in recognition.  
  
Hermione smiled at them, "I'll show you where he's been sleeping."  
  
They entered the kitchen to find Remus helping Elizabeth prepare a late lunch for the four of them. He didn't notice the way Elizabeth smiled knowingly in his direction as he followed Hermione out of the room as she led him upstairs. When they reached the top of the stairs, Hermione led him to the end of the hallway, where she opened the door to what must have been her own bedroom. Severus smirked as he realized that it was exactly what he would have expected of Hermione. Painted a pale yellow, it was feminine without being too girly. No frills and flowers, no ruffly lace bedding. There were rows and rows of bookshelves, now empty, flanking a window, and a simple oak bed with a patchwork quilt spread over it.   
  
He stood near the bassinet, rocking back and forth on his feet with his son in his arms for a few minutes before Hermione came to stand by his side. She whispered, "He'll need fed before his nap."  
  
"Of course..." he reluctantly handed Samuel to Hermione, before moving to help prop some pillows against the headboard so she could recline and relax as she nursed her son to sleep. There wasn't anywhere to sit besides the bed, and he began to feel awkward standing there. He was just about to make an excuse to leave the room when Hermione spoke quietly.  
  
"Severus..." she patted the edge of the bed, "Why don't you have a seat?"  
  
Hesitantly, he sat down, trying not to disturb them as he inched closer to reach over to his son, softly caressing his head. As he sat and watched, Hermione slowly began to drift off to sleep along with Samuel. After a few minutes of watching them sleeping together, he had to fight the urge to reach over and gather both of them into his arms. He eased himself off of the bed and gently covered both of them with a blanket, and even risked brushing a soft kiss to Hermione's temple before he turned to walk out of the room.  
  
"Don't go..."  
  
Severus whirled around to look at Hermione. She was looking back at him through partially closed eyelids, "Samuel missed you..." she whispered.  
  
He slowly eased himself back on to the bed, lying down next to his son, opposite Hermione, and stayed there until she finally drifted off into a deep sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione woke a short while later, looking around the room in confusion. Severus was gone... had it all been a dream? Her dreams had been so vivid lately that even the scent of him lingering in the air did not convince her that he had really been here not an hour ago.  
  
She placed her sleeping son into the bassinet and quietly left the room, rubbing her hand wearily over her eyes as she made her way downstairs. She could hear voices in the kitchen, one of them very familiar... Remus! She smiled brilliantly as she entered the kitchen to greet him, halting in the doorway as she realized that Severus WAS there. None of it had been a dream. It dawned on her then... Remus had been there earlier when she and Severus had passed through the kitchen on their way upstairs, and she hadn't even greeted him.  
  
"Remus!" she rushed forward and embraced him, "I'm sorry I didn't say hello before... I..."  
  
"No worries, Hermione. You had a son to tend to."  
  
"Did I sleep through lunch?" she asked as her cheeks flushed in embarassment.  
  
Elizabeth laughed, "I think they may have saved you a sandwich," she replied, "I forgot what it was like to feed a grown man... let alone two of them!"  
  
Remus laughed as Severus sat back and smirked. Hermione looked at him and realized that he looked more comfortable than she ever would have expected him to be in a Muggle home. "Severus," she asked as she poured herself some tea, "Are you staying the week, as well?"  
  
He looked shocked at her question, "Er... no... I'd better get back tonight. I just wanted to take the opportunity to visit my son for the afternoon..."  
  
"Oh..." Hermione tried to hide her disappointment. Then she remembered that she was thinking about leaving tomorrow, anyway.  
  
"Mum, I was thinking of returning to Hogwarts tomorrow... I'd really like to get back to my studies."  
  
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, "My Hermione... always the bookworm," she laughed, "Go on, Hermione. Remus and I were just discussing the possibility of returning tomorrow, as well. For the holiday feast. We'll come back later in the week to move my belongings."   
  
Hermione paused for a moment, "Oh... well then, maybe..."  
  
"You'd rather go today?" Elizabeth smirked.  
  
"Would you mind?"  
  
"Not at all, Hermione... if Severus doesn't mind seeing you back safely," Elizabeth and Hermione both looked at Severus, who briefly nodded his head in affirmation.  
  
"Whenever you are ready, Hermione."  
  
*****  
  
They spent a few hours visiting with Elizabeth before Severus and Hermione decided that they should get back to Hogwarts. Severus knew that Hermione was anxious to get Samuel back home and into his own bed. He helped her with her trunks, now full with the last of her childhood things. They would be leaving all but one of them behind, to be moved with the rest of Elizabeth's things. Using a shrinking charm, Severus was able to carry the remaining trunk under his arm. Hermione paused in the doorway of her bedroom, a sad smile on her face as her eyes misted over. Severus stood by her side, handing her a handkerchief as she turned to walk out of the room.  
  
He walked behind her down the stairs, and stood in the foyer feeling helpless as she took one last look around... his eyes following her as she walked into the living room, pausing near the fireplace where she stopped to run her hand lovingly over the mantlepiece. She turned to meet her mother at the door, where they embraced and shed their final tears.  
  
"It's time to let go, Hermione... remember what I told you... carry the memories in your heart."  
  
Hermione sobbed as she nodded and turned away to dry her tears. Remus stepped forward and placed a hand on her shoulder, "We'll be seeing you tomorrow," he said softly as he pulled her into an embrace. He looked over her shoulder to Severus and mouthed, "Take care of her..."  
  
Severus nodded abruptly, reaching forward to put his arm around her shoulder. As they reached the front door, he squeezed her shoulder gently before they walked outside. They paused as they reached the end of the sidewalk, where Hermione turned around to take one last look at the home that she was leaving behind. When he felt her shaking with sobs, he turned her around and pulled her into an embrace, allowing her to cry on his shoulder as he murmured soothingly, "Shhh... Everything will be alright."  
  
He felt her nod against his chest before she raised her tearstained face to look up at him, "Take me home," she whispered.  
  
They walked the short distance to the alley where he and Remus had apparated earlier, and disapparated back to the gates of Hogwarts. Walking in silence, they crossed the school grounds and entered the castle, heading straight to the dungeons when they arrived. When they reached her quarters, Severus set the trunk down and took Samuel from Hermione's arms, walking to the nursery and placing their sleeping child into his crib. He returned just a moment later, to find Hermione curled up on the sofa, drying the last of her tears.  
  
Severus didn't know what to say as he crossed the room and kneeled down beside her. He reached up and tenderly brushed the hair away from her face. He paused as she looked up at him, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy, and was surprised when she reached to put her arms around him. Slowly, she leaned forward and brushed her lips to his. He could taste her tears.  
  
"Severus..." she whispered in a hoarse voice, "hold me..."  
  
Hesitantly, he tightened his arms around her as she laid her head against his chest, and he buried his face in her hair, inhaling her sweet scent before pulling her even closer. "Hermione..."  
  
"Just hold me, Severus," she murmured.  
  
"Shhh... Hermione..." he whispered, "If... If I hold you, I won't let go."  
  
"Then don't..."  
  
"Are you sure...?"  
  
"Never let go..."  
  
"Never!" he rasped as he scooped her into his arms and carried her to bed, where he laid by her side and held her through the night. 


	32. Closure

Author's Notes: Just a warning... This chapter is rated R!  
  
I need some reader feedback about the events to come after this chapter... but I don't want to give anything away up front here, so please see my author's note at the end! Feedback will be appreciated!  
  
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers for making this story possible!  
  
Another reminder that you can find a link to my Yahoo group in my profile here at fanfiction.net. Feel free to jump in to discuss HP fanfic (mine, your own, or others), or just to listen to my ramblings. I look forward to getting to know some of you better!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.   
  
*****  
  
Chapter 31 ~ "Closure"  
  
Hermione and Severus spent the next few days sharing intimate embraces and tender kisses as they rekindled the flames that had been burning so deep within each of them for so long. He spent each night holding her as she slept, but it never went further than that. This time, they were taking it slow.  
  
One morning, Hermione woke to find Severus laying beside her with Samuel curled up on his chest. Clutched in Samuel's hands were the old blanket and the plush bunny that Hermione had brought with her from her old home. When she gasped, Severus opened his eyes and looked at her in curiosity, "Something wrong?"  
  
"Where did you find those?"  
  
"I unpacked Samuel's things from your trunk the other night... aren't these his?"  
  
Hermione jumped out of bed and rummaged through her own belongings that she had not yet unpacked. She crawled back into bed with the photo album, and turned to the picture of herself situated in a very similar position with her father. Severus eyes lit up as she showed it to him, "These are yours?" he smirked.  
  
"They WERE," she smiled, "The night that I gave them to Samuel, I dreamed of this picture... only, it wasn't my father and me... it was you and Samuel."  
  
"Thank you, Severus, for making that dream come true," Hermione whispered as she leaned over and kissed him.  
  
*****  
  
Later that week, after journeying with Remus back to London to retrieve her belongings, Elizabeth finally settled in to the cottage. Hermione was thrilled to have her mother close by, and with the warm Spring weather, was enjoying taking Samuel on short outings. Besides going to her mother's, they would often enjoy a walk to the village, a picnic by the lake, and Samuel's favorite, a stroll through the gardens. Samuel was just over four months old, and was developing a new awareness of his surroundings... delighting in the vivid colors of the spring flowers, the fluttering wings of a butterfly, the feel of the grass as Hermione would kneel down with him and let his tender little feet touch the cool blades, giggling as he curled them between his toes.  
  
One evening in late April, Hermione took Samuel for a stroll down to the lake, where they sat and watched the sun set. Hermione reflected on the events of the past year. Tonight marked the first anniversary of Voldemort's downfall... the night that had ultimately changed Hermione's life, forever... the night that Samuel was conceived. She leaned back on her elbows, with Samuel tucked close to her side, lying on a soft blanket that she had brought along. He was nearly asleep as she turned onto her side and murmured to him, "No regrets, my son."  
  
"No regrets," spoke a hoarse voice behind her. She jolted up and whirled her head around... it was Severus.  
  
"Severus, I... you startled me," she gasped.  
  
Severus kneeled down to brush his son's cheek with the back of his hand, "Two miracles occured that night," he whispered, "The second of which is laying right here in front of me. My son..." he smiled. Hermione patted an empty spot on the blanket, inviting him to sit down with them. He leaned back and looked at the stars, as Hermione did the same, "The other..." he sighed. He didn't remember the dark mark disappearing from his arm, signalling the downfall of the Dark Lord.  
  
"The night sky is nearly the same as it was..." Hermione got caught up in her own memories, "Those same stars watched over us... kept us safe...." she broke off as she realized where the discussion was heading. "I'm sorry, Severus... you don't remember."  
  
He turned towards her, "I remember..."  
  
"You do?"  
  
He chuckled, "The sky. I remember the sky. It was a clear night just like this one. I remember the battle... I remember apparating you to safety. And then...nothing..." he sighed.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"We've been over this, Hermione. There is nothing to be sorry about," he turned to his side, facing his sleeping son as he reached over to stroke his back.  
  
"Severus... do you want to... remember?"  
  
He sighed, "Yes. I can live without knowing, but I don't like having pieces of my memory missing. Sometimes, I think I remember, but it's probably just the flashes of your memories that I witnessed so long ago, coming back to haunt me. I have come to accept that I may never remember... but I think I NEED to remember... I want to move on, but first I need...," he paused as he tried to think of what it was that he was trying to say, "closure."  
  
Hermione nodded, "I understand, Severus. Two weeks ago, I probably wouldn't have understood your need. I didn't want to go back, to revisit my past. I thought the memories would hurt too much. But now that I've said my final goodbyes, I feel that I can finally move on. I've had my closure," she looked deep into his eyes, "and now, it's time for you to have yours."  
  
"What do you mean, Hermione?" he asked, his voice filled with confusion.  
  
"We need to go back..."  
  
"No. It will be too painful for you..."  
  
"No, Severus. I've had my time to heal. It's your turn..." she stood and held her hand out to him, "Let's take Samuel home. I'm sure Remus will watch him for us tonight."  
  
They walked back to the school, where Remus was more than happy to care for Samuel for a few hours. Holding hands, they walked silently across the grounds and into the Forest. Severus didn't know how, but he remembered the way. His eyes grew wide as they stepped into the clearing, and he dropped to his knees.  
  
"Severus?" Hermione whispered in concern as she kneeled down before him.  
  
He reached over and grabbed his arm, "I remember... the mark..." he gasped and closed his eyes, "The mark disappeared... that was right before..." he looked up at her, "you kissed me!"  
  
Hermione nodded, "And you kissed me back," she smirked. Severus reached out and softly brushed her face with the back of his hand, "You looked so beautiful..."  
  
Her eyes wide, Hermione gasped, "You thought I was beautiful?"  
  
"I still do," he leaned forward and kissed her softly, "but last year... I had never noticed... not before that night."  
  
Suddenly, Severus jumped to his feet and stalked away towards the break in the trees, in the same fashion that he had walked away from her that night so long ago.  
  
"Severus!" Hermione cried, her eyes tearing as she watched him disappear.  
  
A moment later, he reappeared, his face pale and drawn, "Hermione..." he rushed to her, pulling her to her feet and into his arms, "I remember... everything. I'm so... I'm sorry," he whispered hoarsely.  
  
"Don't be," she replied as she reached up and stroked his hair, "No regrets, remember?"  
  
"No regrets," Severus rasped as he leaned in and crushed his lips to hers. Hermione pulled him closer as they tumbled to the ground, touching and kissing each other everywhere, their passion burning hotter with every kiss.  
  
"Severus... I want you..." she murmured, "Make love to me..."  
  
Severus pulled back and looked into her eyes, "Here?"  
  
She smiled at him, "Here... just like the first time."  
  
"No," he whispered, "Better than the first time. I won't walk away. I love you too much..."   
  
It was true. He didn't know it until he said it, but he did love her. Now that he admitted it to himself, he needed to say it to her again, "Hermione... I love you!" he rasped.  
  
Hermione's eyes were brimming with tears as she looked back at him, trying to find her voice as she mouthed, "I love you, too."  
  
A single tear slid from his eye as Severus tenderly laid her down on the soft patch of ground underneath the same tree where they had conceived their son a year before. But this time, it was different. He made love to her slowly, cherishing every inch of her body as he slowly undressed her, kissing her everywhere. As his warm hands caressed her soft curves, Hermione reached out to remove his robes, whispering words of love to him as she unbuttoned his shirt and let her hands begin to explore his body.  
  
They lay there, touching and exploring and loving each other as if it were their first time... realizing that, in a way, it was. It was the first time that they knew that it could be this way forever.  
  
"Severus...", Hermione panted in need as she reached down to guide him into her, moaning as she felt the tip of his shaft gently brushing against her warmth, "I need you..."  
  
He leaned down to capture her lips once more, as he slowly eased himself into her. As they slowly rocked back and forth together, they continued murmuring to each other.  
  
"I love you..."  
  
"Don't ever stop..."  
  
"Never..."  
  
With each slow thrust, they could feel the passion building as their bodies pulsed against each other. With a shuddering cry, Hermione reached her peak as Severus spilled his seed into her. He gently rolled her over to lay her head on his chest, as he pulled his robe over her to keep her warm. They finally put the past behind them as they lay there under the stars, gently caressing each other as they contemplated the future.  
  
When Hermione reached over to grab her wand a few moments later, Severus suddenly grabbed her hand. Rolling over so that she was beneath him, he pinned both of her hands to the ground above her head as he leaned in to kiss her tenderly.  
  
"Hermione... don't do it..." he murmured into her ear, as one of his hands reached down to caress her abdomen.  
  
"But Severus..." she gasped.  
  
He leaned in and silenced her with another kiss before he continued. For everything that he had left unsaid those past months, Severus poured his heart out as he finally admitted his deepest desires, "I love you, Hermione. I don't ever want to be apart from you, again. I love you, and I love our son, and I want..." he paused for a moment, inhaling sharply before he continued, "I want us to be a family. I want to be with you, Hermione... "  
  
"Severus..." her eyes darted back and forth as she looked deep into his eyes, trying to read his soul. For the first time, she could see that he was holding nothing back, "Do you mean it?"  
  
"Every word," he leaned in to nuzzle her ear as he whispered, "Marry me, Hermione..."  
  
"Yes... yes!" she murmured as she turned her head to kiss him deeply.  
  
As their passion began to reignite, Hermione whispered against his lips, "And... this...?" she reached down and placed her hand over one of his own that was still caressing her abdomen.  
  
"Only if you want..." he smiled.  
  
"Do you...?"  
  
Severus began kissing her neck, "One year ago, we conceived a child of passion. That child taught me how to love... YOU taught me how to love. I want to conceive a child of that love..." he sighed.  
  
"Severus..." she whispered as he placed a finger on her soft lips to silence her.  
  
"We can wait... I just wanted you to know..."  
  
"Severus..." she tried to push his finger away.  
  
"If you're not ready..."  
  
Hermione rolled him over and pinned him beneath her, "Severus!" her eyes glinted mischeivously.  
  
He looked back at her in amusement, "Yes, love?"  
  
"I'm ready..." she rasped as she leaned in and kissed him passionately, showing him just how ready she was.  
  
*****  
  
Author's Note: Hermione and Severus have finally come full circle, and this was to be the final chapter before the epilogue... but it's really hard for me to think about not writing this story anymore! sigh Anyway... this time, I think I'll leave it open for my readers to decide. Should I write a few chapters of fluff leading up to a wedding, or just post the epilogue as planned? Feel free to leave your opinion in a review, or email me, or join me at my Yahoo group (link is in my profile). 


	33. Planning the Future

Author's Note: Thank you for the overwhelming requests to continue. I'll write a few additional chapters, concluding with the wedding. For those who asked about a sequel... I'm thinking about it! I don't have any ideas for one, yet... but would really like to do one. Also, for the Remus/Elizabeth fans... I have started their story, titled "Learning to Live Again". The prologue and chapter 1 are up now if you'd like to read it. It will start off following the same timeline as this story, but will continue past what I have written for Sev/Hermione.  
  
Thank you to all of my readers! All questions, comments, and constructive criticism are welcome if you would like to leave a review.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
If it were up to them, they would have stayed there all night, making love under the stars, but they knew that they had to return to their son. Slowly, they made their way back to the castle, stopping every few minutes to share a tender kiss. Whether they had conceived a child or not that evening, they were both ready to start a new life together. When they entered the castle, Severus had his arm around Hermione and she was nestled close to his side.  
  
"Lovely evening, isn't it?" they heard somebody call.  
  
Severus smirked... he should have known that Albus would be waiting for them. Hermione smiled as Severus answered with a simple, "Good evening, Albus!" as they continued walking towards the dungeons. They didn't see his face, but they could sense that his eyes were twinkling even brighter than usual as he watched them walk away.  
  
When they entered Hermione's quarters, Remus smiled knowingly at both of them. As he rose to his feet, he looked back and forth between the two of them, "Have a nice stroll?" Hermione reached out to him and embraced him without answering. "You're glowing, Hermione..." he whispered into her ear. Severus cleared his throat a moment later, looking intensely at Remus as Hermione backed away, her face flushed. A moment later, without a single word, he extended his hand to a bemused Remus, who grasped it in a firm handshake.  
  
"Er... well then... I should be going," Remus stammered, "Oh... Samuel is sleeping," he added before he walked towards the door. He paused one more time to call to Hermione, "I assume you will be needing to visit with your mother tomorrow?" he asked with a mischievous glint in his eye.  
  
Hermione couldn't help but smile as she nodded, "Yes... I definitely need to see my mother tomorrow."  
  
"Very well," he nodded at each of them, "Good night Hermione... Severus."  
  
After he walked out, Hermione turned to Severus who pulled her tightly to him, "How does he know?" she laughed.   
  
Severus chuckled as he shrugged his shoulders, "He must be taking lessons from Albus."  
  
He reached to tangle his fingers in her hair, leaning her head back as he bent forward to catch her soft lips in a gentle kiss, he pulled away and let his forehead come to rest against hers. Hermione could feel his warm breath on her face as he whispered, "Tell me I'm not dreaming..."  
  
"If this is a dream, then I never want to wake up," she rasped before leading him over to the bed.  
  
*****  
  
The next day, they spent a lazy morning in bed. Between making love nearly all night, and rising early to bring Samuel in to cuddle with them early that morning, neither of them was in the mood to get out of bed that morning. Luckily, it was the weekend, and the students still had another day of break before they returned to finish the school year, so Severus had no duties to attend to. Even after Samuel returned to his room for a nap, they remained lying in each other's arms. Every so often, Severus would reach his hand over to caress Hermione's abdomen, a far away expression on his face. She had never seen him look that way before.  
  
"You really want this, don't you?" she asked as she ran her fingers through his hair.  
  
"More than anything!" he replied adamantly.  
  
"Mmm... me too..." she replied sleepily. She closed her eyes as a smile played across her lips.  
  
He chuckled, "Well then... we'll just have to keep trying."  
  
"Sounds nice..." she murmured. They lay there in silence for a while before Hermione spoke again, "Severus..."  
  
"Yes, love?"  
  
Hermione smiled at the endearment. It was something she never would have thought Severus capable of... but it seemed to sound so right coming from his lips, and she would never tire of hearing it.  
  
"I want Samuel to be a Snape."  
  
Severus crooked an eyebrow, "Isn't he?"  
  
She laughed, "Of course he is... but not in name."  
  
"Oh," Severus replied. He thought about it a moment before it sunk in, "Oh! You want to change his name?"  
  
Hermione nodded, "I should have done it in the first place... but I didn't know then how you felt about having a child... I didn't want to assume..."  
  
"I understand, Hermione," he kissed her temple.  
  
"Would it please you?" she asked.  
  
"More than you could ever know," he rasped as he buried his head in her hair.  
  
They lay there in silence for a while before Hermione spoke up again, "Severus..."  
  
"What is it, love?" he murmured sleepily.  
  
"He should be baptized. I should have done it a long time ago... but everything was so confusing before."  
  
"I hadn't thought of it," he sighed, "But you are probably right. And it would be the perfect time to change his surname."  
  
"And we need to name a Godfather," Hermione continued.  
  
"Remus?" he asked. He knew it was who Hermione would want, but hadn't anticipated her reaction. She burst into tears as she buried her head into his chest and nodded. He reached up to stroke her hair as he asked, "Hermione?"  
  
"I just..." she choked into his shoulder, "I just didn't expect you to be so... agreeable!"  
  
He chuckled, "Is it a problem?"  
  
She laughed through her tears, "No... no. It's just that... I'm so happy..."  
  
"And if I suggested having him baptized on our wedding day, would it be...?" he didn't get to finish as Hermione reached up to pull his lips to hers.  
  
"It would be perfect," she whispered.  
  
*****  
  
It turned out to be a beautiful afternoon for a walk to the cottage. Neither of them knew what Elizabeth's reaction would be, but judging by Remus' behavior the previous evening, Hermione had a feeling that her mother would be happy for them. Severus had hoped so, too. He was quite fond of Elizabeth, as she had accepted him and treated him like part of the family almost from the start. Nevertheless, he was nervous. Accepting him as the father of her grandchild was one thing, accepting him as a son-in-law was quite another. He didn't know what to expect.  
  
They knocked on the door, but there was no answer. Knowing that her mother enjoyed spending time in the fresh air, Hermione led Severus around to the back of the house to see if she was outside. What they saw caused Hermione to gasp.  
  
Her mother was sitting on Remus' lap on the porch swing, kissing him tenderly. They were both oblivious to the arrival of Hermione and Severus.  
  
Severus turned to Hermione to gauge her reaction, relieved to see her break out in one of her most brilliant smiles. A moment later, he cleared his throat, announcing their presence. Elizabeth blushed as she pulled away from Remus and turned to face Hermione.  
  
"Er... oh! Hermione! Severus! I didn't know you were here!" Elizabeth spoke nervously as she eased herself to her feet.  
  
"Obviously not," Hermione replied in amusement, trying to supress her laughter. She was truly happy to see the two of them together, and she stepped forward to embrace her mother. "Mum... I have the most wonderful news."  
  
Hermione looked at Remus, and he smiled encouragingly as he nodded to her.  
  
"Severus and I..." she paused as she saw her mother's eyes growing wider, "Mum... we're getting married!"  
  
Elizabeth looked shocked for a moment. Quickly, she composed herself and stepped forward to embrace her daughter once again. "Oh... Hermione..."  
  
As she stepped back, Hermione could see approval shining through her mother's tears. Remus winked at Hermione as he stepped behind Elizabeth to put his arm around her, kissing her on the temple as he whispered, "I told you they would work things out."  
  
"You did?" Hermione asked.  
  
"We've been wondering, since Valentine's Day, when you'd get around to it!" Elizabeth laughed as she stepped forward to embrace Severus. "You're a good man, Severus Snape. I have always known that you would make my daughter happy."  
  
"Always, Mum?" Hermione asked.  
  
Elizabeth chuckled, "Well... at least since my visit over Valentine's Day. I could see it in your eyes then, Hermione. And yours too, Severus."  
  
Hermione laughed as she saw the color rising in Severus' cheeks. It wasn't often that somebody could make the man blush.  
  
Elizabeth reached out to take her grandson into her arms. As she relieved Severus of his son, Remus stepped forward to firmly shake his hand, "Congratulations, Severus."  
  
"Remus..." Severus hesitated a moment, "Can I have a word?"  
  
Hermione looked on in confusion as Remus and Severus stepped aside for a few moments. She tried to observe unobtrusively, but couldn't make out a word they were saying. It all became clear to her a moment later as she saw Remus smile as he heartily clapped Severus on the back.  
  
*****  
  
Severus had pulled Remus aside. For once in his life, he had a favor to ask of the werewolf, and didn't know how to ask him.  
  
"Remus, I know we've had our differences in the past, and though I may not have said so in so many words lately... I appreciate all that you have done for Hermione and Samuel," he paused for a moment, "Would you consider standing up with me at my wedding?"  
  
Remus was taken aback for a moment, "You want me... to be your best man?"  
  
"I'd be honored if you would consider," Severus replied.  
  
"And I'd be honored to accept, Severus!" Remus smiled as he reached out and clapped Severus on the back. He looked over to the women, who were trying not to be obvious about their eavesdropping, "Does Hermione know?"  
  
"I suspect she does now," Severus smirked, "However, we should go tell her. She has something important to ask you, herself."  
  
Remus furrowed his brow, "She does?"  
  
"Indeed," Severus nodded as he led Remus back to where Elizabeth and Hermione were fussing over Samuel.  
  
Severus stepped behind Hermione and snaked an arm around her waist, "I've found my best man," he whispered into her ear, "Now it's your turn to ask him the other question."  
  
Hermione smiled in approval. She hadn't known, or expected, that Severus would ask Remus to stand up with him... but she was thrilled with his choice. She kissed him on the cheek before she turned to Remus and smiled nervously.  
  
"Remus... you know how I feel about you... and I know how you feel about Samuel," she paused and looked at Elizabeth, who looked as though she knew what was coming, "We've decided to have him baptized on our wedding day, and it would mean the world to me... to US... if you would be his Godfather."  
  
If Remus had been shocked by Severus request, he was absolutely in floored by Hermione's. His jaw dropped as he was obviously having trouble finding his voice.  
  
"Samuel's... Godfather? Me...?"  
  
"Who else, Remus? There is nobody I'd rather have than you! You are... everything..." she choked as her eyes welled with tears, "you mean so much to me... to US..." Giving up on finding the right words, Hermione flung herself forward into Remus' arms. He had trouble fighting his own tears as he hugged her back.  
  
"Is that a 'Yes'?" Hermione whispered.  
  
"How could I possibly say no?" he replied as he stepped back and looked her in the eye, "I'd be honored, Hermione."  
  
*****  
  
They all retreated inside the cottage for a cup of tea, and discussed wedding plans. Hermione and Severus both agreed that late June would suit them both fine. For Severus, it meant that school would be out for the year. For Hermione, it meant that Harry and Ron would be home from their training. She would not get married without her two best friends in attendance. She laughed and playfully punched Severus on the shoulder as he sneered and suggested putting them both in dresses so they could be her bridesmaids. No... she had already decided that her mother would be her matron of honor, and her mother had tearfully accepted.  
  
As Hermione and Severus were preparing to leave, Elizabeth approached them. "Severus... may I have a word with you?"  
  
"Certainly, Elizabeth," he replied, as he looked at Hermione in confusion. Hermione simply shrugged her shoulders... she hadn't a clue what her mother could have wanted.  
  
Severus followed Elizabeth into the living room, where she asked him to wait for a moment. When she returned, she had a small parcel in her hand. As she gently unwrapped it, she turned to him, "Severus... this belonged to Hermione's father. It has been passed down through generations of Granger men for years. I always knew that he would one day give it to the man his daughter would marry, to one day be passed down to his grandson." She reached out and placed the pocket watch into his hand, "I want you to have this, Severus. Keep it until it's time to pass it on to Samuel."  
  
He was speechless... nobody had ever shown him a kindness like this woman. He looked up at her as he stammered, "Elizabeth... I... don't know if I should..."  
  
"He would have wanted you to have it, Severus. That, I know for sure," she reached out and closed his fingers around the timepiece, "If you can't take it for you, then take it for Samuel."  
  
Severus nodded solemnly, before reaching out and embracing the woman. He had never impulsively done so before, and had even felt awkward returning her hugs of greeting in the past... but this time, he clutched her tightly, kissing her on the cheek as he backed away.  
  
"Welcome to the family," Elizabeth smiled at him. 


	34. The Proposal

Author's Note: This is the condensed response to my most recent reviews... I might go more in depth at my Yahoo group if you'd like to read about it.   
  
The whole hurt/comfort thing... I had thought of having something happen to Severus... I even planted a couple of clues to a possible future event. But now, I think I'm saving that for the sequel. I want them to have a little happiness first.  
  
Why is Hermione crying so much? Remember what Remus said when he tried to talk some sense into her after her last row with Severus? Her world has been turned upside down... she's not a little girl anymore... she's been thrust into situations that have made her grow up a bit too fast, and it's a lot for her to handle. Plus, those darn pregnancy hormones tend to rear their ugly head every now and then during the first few post-partum months.  
  
Anyway... another R rated chapter here... and I warned you all that further chapters would be fluffy, didn't I? So... here we go... Fluff alert! :p  
  
Thank you all again for sticking with my story. To my readers and reviewers... {{{Hugs}}}}  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is copyright JK Rowling. Her characters are not being used for profit, only personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Hand in hand they walked back to the castle. Severus had never felt so content in his life. For the first time that he could ever remember, he was anticipating the future without dreading it. They reached Hermione's quarters, and he paused to kiss her after she carried Samuel to the nursery to put him down for a nap.  
  
"Hermione... I have something I need to do," he sighed as he tried to pull away from her.  
  
"Can't it wait?" she whispered as she pulled him back to her and kissed him.  
  
Severus moaned, "I wish it could, but..." he paused for a moment, "It's urgent."  
  
"As urgent as this?" she asked as her hands began to roam down his body.   
  
Severus chuckled and grabbed her wrist as she fingered the waist of his trousers, "Nearly," he groaned as he finally managed to pull away from her. He leaned in to place a chaste kiss on her head, "Now, why don't you go relax... take a nap, and a nice long bath... and then get dressed for a night out."  
  
"A night out?" she asked in confusion. They had never really gone out before. She smiled in anticipation, "Where to?"  
  
"That's for me to know," he smirked, "Just go... get ready. I'll return in a few hours."  
  
Hermione sighed as he turned and swept out the door, his robes billowing behind him. "It must be urgent if it makes him billow so," she laughed to herself before she followed his suggestion to relax for a while. She couldn't help but wonder where he would be taking her, as she filled the bath with warm water, watching it lather into a luxurious cloud of bubbles. She immersed herself into the water, leaning her head back and soaking until her fingers pruned and the water had cooled so much that she was beginning to feel a chill.  
  
Wrapping her dressing gown around her, she slipped into her room only to hear Samuel crying in the next room. She walked in and smiled down at him, "You're naps are getting few and farther between, young man." She sighed, "Come on, then... you can lie down with your Mum."  
  
Curling up on the bed with Samuel suckling at her breast, she fell into a content slumber. It was nearly dinner when she awoke, fretting that she had overslept. Luckily, Samuel was content to lie on a soft blanket on the floor and visually explore his surroundings while she dressed. He was now rolling over regularly, and was learning to pull himself up onto his knees, grunting as he rocked back and forth, determined to find a way to mobilize himself. Hermione smiled wistfully at him as she realized that, at this rate, he would be crawling in a few more weeks. She closed her eyes as her hand drifted to her abdomen... yes, it would be nice to have another baby. Samuel was growing up far too quickly for her liking.  
  
She rummaged through her wardrobe, frowning at the meager selection of robes. Other than Valentine's Day, she hadn't had much occasion to go out since Samuel's birth. Furthermore, she didn't know where Severus was taking her, and what would be appropriate. She sighed as she decided to forgo the robes, and selected one of her nicer dresses, instead. Reminiscent of the style of robes she had worn to the Valentine's ball, the top of the emerald green dress was form-fitting, gathered at the waist, and flowed gracefully to her ankles. The sleeves were a long and fitted, tapering to a point on the backs of her hands. A pair of high boots that laced up to the knees completed the ensemble. Just as she finished putting the finishing touches on her hair and makeup, there was a knock on the door. She furrowed her brow in confusion. Severus never knocked... who could it be? She called out, "Who is it?"  
  
"Hermione... It's Mum!"  
  
"And Remus," she heard a second voice.  
  
She smiled as she called out to them, "Enter!"  
  
Remus and Elizabeth entered her room, smiling as if they knew something that she didn't know. Remus looked at her and beamed with joy, "You look lovely, Hermione."  
  
"Beautiful..." her mother whispered with a gentle smile.  
  
"Why...?" she began to ask why they had come.  
  
"We're here to babysit. Severus asked us this afternoon," Remus explained as her mother looked fit to burst with anticipation.  
  
"OK, you two," Hermione scowled, unconvincingly, as she looked back and forth between them, "What is Severus up to?"  
  
"Why don't you come with me, and find out," she heard the reply come from the doorway. She looked over to see Severus standing there, looking at her with a glint in his eye. She looked him over to see that he had forgone his usual formal attire and was wearing black trousers and a silk shirt, with a light weight black dress robe. She smiled at him in appreciation. He looked so handsome tonight. He looked much more relaxed... less stiff than he did in his usual frock coat with the long billowy robe that he normally wore.  
  
He held his arm out to her, "Milady," his eyes twinkled as Hermione laughed and laced her hand through the crook of his arm.  
  
Every time Hermione opened her mouth to ask where they were going, Severus would shush her. After the tenth time, he turned to her and crushed his lips to hers to silence her. "Hermione... just this once... please, don't insist on knowing everything." Hermione blushed and looked down at her feet, "Sorry.."  
  
Severus chuckled, "Not at all... we're almost there. Close your eyes."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Hermione!" he chastised her impatiently, as he tried to feign a scowl, "Miss Granger, you will do as you are told!"  
  
"Yes, Professor Snape," she replied as she surpressed a giggle. Closing her eyes, she allowed him to lead her up another staircase. Higher and higher they climbed, until she felt a fresh spring breeze caressing her face. "Now?" she asked quietly.  
  
She felt him grab her hand and lead her forward a few steps before he turned to her and said, "Now."  
  
Hermione opened her eyes and gasped. They were on the roof of one of the towers. There were hundreds of candles placed all around, and a carpet of rose petals scattered on the floor. A small table was set with two crystal flutes and a bottle of champagne. Severus led her over to take a seat, and she turned to look up at him in adoration. "Severus... it's beautiful!" He leaned in and kissed her gently, "So are you," he whispered as he looked at her, bathed in the glow of the candlelight. Her eyes were dancing with the flicker of hundreds of tiny flames. He paused to pour them each a glass of champagne, making Hermione giggle as he popped the cork and foam spouted out of the top.  
  
He handed her a glass as he moved to sit beside her, looking deeply into her eyes. Neither of them said a word... they didn't need to. Their eyes said it all.  
  
Severus leaned in for a brief kiss before he backed away, clearing his throat as he reached to set his glass on the table.  
  
"Hermione..." he began, his voice quickly turning to a hoarse whisper, closing his eyes for a moment before he continued, "I used to be afraid of falling in love, of giving my heart away. How could I trust a woman to love me? Then I met you, and I realized how much we could share together. You have renewed my life, Hermione. I want to join that life with yours."   
  
He reached out and took her hand into his own as he slipped a ring on her finger, looking up at her as he whispered, "Hermione Granger, will you marry me?"  
  
Hermione was at a loss for words. How could she respond to anything so eloquent... so beautiful? She nodded her head and leaned in to kiss him passionately. Severus could feel a wetness on his cheeks, and didn't know if the tears were Hermione's or his own as he held her close.  
  
"Is that a yes?" he asked in an amused voice as he pulled away to look into her eyes.  
  
"Yes!" Hermione exclaimed as she threw her arms around him. Over his shoulder she looked down to see, for the first time, the ring that he had placed on her finger. It was an etched platinum band mounted with a bezel set, champagne colored stone. She gasped as she pulled away and looked closer, "Severus... What stone is this?"  
  
He smiled, "It's a champagne diamond... do you like it?" he furrowed his brow. He knew that Hermione wouldn't want an elaborate ring, but he wanted to give her more than the common white diamond. It had taken a good part of the afternoon to find something simple, yet elegant... something that was uniquely Hermione.  
  
She nodded her head emphatically, "It's beautiful..." she looked into his eyes, "it's perfect." She leaned in to kiss him once again, this time her hands reached to remove his robes before her fingers moved to unbutton his shirt. He returned her kiss passionately before backing away... "No... not here... your room..."  
  
"But Mum and Remus..."   
  
"Have taken Samuel out for the evening," he grinned mischievously, as he scooped her into his arms and swept her away to the dungeons, "They won't be back for hours."  
  
*****  
  
It was a good thing that the students had not returned yet, or they would have caught an eyeful of Severus and Hermione kissing and touching each other intimately as he carried her to the dungeons. When they reached her quarters, he muttered an unlocking charm and nudged the door open with his foot, kicking it closed behind him after they entered. He carried Hermione to the bed, where he lay her down and began to undress her. Reaching down to remove her boots, he groaned in frustration when he discovered that they were tightly laced to the knee.  
  
Hermione sat up and reached her hand down to help him, but he grabbed her fingers and pushed them away.  
  
"Lie back," he told her as he slowly began to unlace her boots, running one hand over her thigh as his other gently worked one boot down to expose her calf. He leaned in and left a trail of tender kisses down her leg, as he continued to remove the boot, pausing as he lifted her delicate foot and gently kissed the tender arch, causing her to moan in anticipation. He directed his attention to her other foot, where he slowly went through the same process of removing the other boot. After he pulled it off, he kissed the arch of that foot as well, before trailing his lips back up her calf, pausing to gently suckle the tender area behind her knee as his hands continued to caress her thighs. When his kisses continued up her thighs, she gasped in delight. For all of their passionate lovemaking, he had never kissed her there before. She laced her fingers into his hair as she gently encouraged him to move just a little bit higher. Gently, he reached his fingers to her hips to pull off her undergarments. When he placed his lips to her tender bud, she bucked her hips and nearly screamed at the new sensation. Biting her lip, she panted as he continued exploring her folds with his tongue. She curled her fingers tighter into his hair as she pulled him up to her, stammering as she gasped "Severus... I... I n-need you... n-now..."  
  
He smiled as he positioned himself on top of her, reaching his hand down to assist her as her trembling fingers fumbled with the buttons on his trousers. When she had finally managed to free him of his constraints, he reached down to lift the hem of her gown higher, until it was scrunched up above her hips, giving him access to her centre. Frantically, she pulled him into her, finally screaming as she felt him enter, causing her to shudder in delight. She had never reached her peak so quickly before, and was surprised to find her body still begging for more. They rode through wave after wave of passion until they were both spent. Severus collapsed on top of her, burying his head in her hair as he moaned in satisfaction. When he rolled her over to snuggle by his side a while later, he whispered to her, "I never knew it could feel like this, Hermione."  
  
"What do you mean?" she murmured.  
  
"It was always... just sex. Never have I been with a woman who made me feel as though my heart would burst with joy... never have I held a woman like this afterwards," he sighed, "You are the only woman who has made me feel as though I have made love, Hermione. I don't ever want it to be "just sex" with you."  
  
"Never?" she arched an eyebrow as she teased him.  
  
"Never..." he rasped as he closed his arms around her. 


	35. End of Term

Author's note: I had to have some fun torturing Severus later in this chapter. Hope you enjoy it!  
  
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 34 ~ End of Term  
  
By the time Remus and Elizabeth returned with Samuel that evening, Severus and Hermione had straightened themselves out to look presentable. Hermione knew that, after last night, Remus had probably suspected that she had once again become intimate with Severus... but she didn't want to make it obvious to her mother. Not that her mother would be upset... after all, Hermione had already borne Severus a son... but she knew it would be uncomfortable for all of them if her mother walked in on them half dressed and dishevelled.  
  
It probably hadn't made a difference, anyway. When they arrived, Remus looked at them with a bemused expression on his face, as Elizabeth tried to cover a nervous smile.  
  
"Well?" Elizabeth asked as she crossed the room and handed Samuel to Severus.  
  
Hermione's eyes grew wide, "Well WHAT, Mum?"  
  
Elizabeth laughed and reached out for Hermione's hand, "Let me see it then."  
  
"So you DID know what Severus was up to?" she scoffed as her mother appraised her ring.  
  
"Mmm-hmm... I told you, he asked us this afternoon to take Samuel for the evening... I managed to get him to tell me why," she looked up to Hermione and smiled, "It's beautiful, Hermione."  
  
Hermione beamed, "It is, isn't it?" she replied as she inched closer to Severus to look lovingly at her sleeping son.  
  
Remus cleared his throat, "Well then... I suppose I should be getting you home now..." he turned to Elizabeth and smiled.  
  
"Yes, it is getting late," she turned to Hermione and hugged her good night before she walked out the door with Remus.  
  
After they were gone, Severus turned to Hermione and sighed regretfully, "It IS getting late. And the students return tomorrow," he scowled.  
  
Hermione pouted seductively, "You aren't leaving, are you?"  
  
"As I said, the students..."  
  
"Return tomorrow," she smiled as she took Samuel from his arms, "It's not tomorrow, yet," she called over her shoulder as she carried Samuel into the nursery.  
  
When she returned, she said, "Wait here," as she walked away and into her bathroom. When she returned, she was wearing nothing but her dressing gown, which was tied loosely at the waist, allowing it to remain partially open and exposing most of her tender flesh. She had a bottle in her hand, and she held it up for Severus to see.  
  
"What is that for?" he eyed the bottle of lotion.  
  
"You."  
  
"Me?"  
  
"I think you need a nice massage tonight, so you will be nice and relaxed for the students tomorrow."  
  
"Indeed?" he asked as Hermione began to undress him. When she had stripped him of all but his shorts, she pushed him back onto the bed and began to firmly massage his back.  
  
"That smells good... do I smell... vanilla?"  
  
"Mmm... yes, I didn't want to use a floral scented lotion. What would the students think if they returned to find you smelling like roses? They might think you've gone soft."  
  
"Thank you for sparing me," Severus scoffed, "Besides, I don't like flowers..."  
  
"Really? Then whose idea was it to scatter rose-petals all over the tower tonight?" she asked as her fingers kneaded his shoulders.  
  
"Albus..." Severus groaned as he buried his head into his pillows.  
  
"I should have known..." she laughed, "the candles, too?"  
  
"No," he murmured, "That was all me... I love the way you look in the firelight. Candlelight works just as well."  
  
She leaned in to kiss the back of his neck as her touch became more gentle on his lower back, "It was perfect. Thank you, Severus." Her fingers wandered lower and lower, her robe slipping slowly off her shoulders until it exposed her entire torso. She leaned in and pressed her warm flesh to his back, still massaging him gently as she convinced Severus to spend one more night in her bed.  
  
*****  
  
The students returned, and classes resumed that week. Once again, Severus and Hermione began working diligently on her research. Hermione also decided to continue her apprenticeship in Potions next year. She truly did enjoy brewing potions, and found her research exhilirating. Furthermore, she was determined to complete her studies no matter what happened in the future. She knew she could do it, as long as Severus was by her side.  
  
Now that her mother lived close by, she had volunteered to help with Samuel during Hermione's study hours. Some nights, she would venture to the castle, and occasionally, Remus would stop by to pick up Samuel and take him to visit Elizabeth at the cottage. It worked out well for Ginny, who gladly would have continued to help out, but needed all the time she could spare to study for her N.E.W.T.s.  
  
The weeks began to fly by, and soon, Severus was preoccupied preparing for end of year exams. They didn't get to spend nearly as much time together as they would have liked to during the last few weeks of the term. They would meet discreetly in the classroom and in the corridors for stolen kisses and intimate embraces between his classes. Only once were they caught by a student. To Hermione's relief, and Severus' chagrin, that student was Ginny Weasley. By now, Ginny had gotten to know Severus well enough that the idea of them together did not affect her much. She just giggled and walked away, calling over her shoulder, "Ten points from Slytherin, Professor Snape."  
  
Hermione laughed as she continued to kiss Severus, "If she were on the receiving end of this, she would have rewarded you points instead of taking them away."  
  
Severus scowled as he feigned a shudder, "Thank you for that mental image, Hermione. Please, obliviate me now."  
  
Even though they had tried to remain discreet, five months of living in close quarters and accompanying each other to most meals each day had eventually fueled many rumors. Hermione would hear hushed whispers as she passed students in the corridors. She doubted that Severus had ever heard them... the students wouldn't dare gossip about him in his presence. She sighed and realized that it would probably be wise to go public with their relationship. Everybody seemed to know, anyway... and those that didn't would find out soon enough, as the wedding was only weeks away.  
  
"Absolutely not, Hermione! My private affairs are none of their business!" Severus would scowl every time they broached the subject.  
  
It was the only thing that they had argued about since their reconciliation over the holiday. He was adamant about keeping his private life private. Hermione insisted that going public would stop the rumors from getting ugly. In the end, it was Albus who convinced them to let him announce their engagement... but not until the end of term feast. Severus was satisfied with that, as the students would be leaving the day after the feast, and he wouldn't have to deal with whatever their reactions would lead to. For the time being, he was determined to keep his students on task by preparing them for their exams. It would be much easier for him if he could pretend to remain oblivious to their knowledge of his love life.  
  
Before they knew it, exams had come and gone, the school year was over, and it was time for the end of year feast. Severus was even more reluctant than usual to enjoy the festivities, but he had to be there to represent his House. Albus had invited Elizabeth to join them, and she sat by Remus' side, holding Samuel.  
  
After their meal, they sat back and listened to Albus make his end of year announcements. For the first time in many years, Gryffindor hadn't won the house cup. Without their star seeker, and an inexperienced Keeper, they had lost the Quidditch Cup as well. It was Slytherin who took both honors that night. As Hermione saw Severus smirking in satisfaction towards Professor McGonagall, she leaned in and whispered, "And who did you snog in the corridors to earn THAT many points?" Severus nearly choked on his pumpkin juice.   
  
As the applause for Slytherin died down, Albus clapped his hands to get the students' attention once more.   
  
Hermione could sense Severus squirming in his seat, though he tried not to make it obvious. She knew that he was not looking forward to, in his own words "making a spectacle of himself" in front of the entire school. She put her hand on his thigh and squeezed him in reassurance. "Placing your hand THERE is doing nothing to calm me, Hermione."  
  
"Oh! Sorry," she smirked as she moved her hand and gently reached for his hand to squeeze it gently.  
  
Hermione turned to look at Albus, as Severus concentrated on looking at his plate, trying not to scowl. He had tried to tune it all out, and so only heard the end of the announcement, "...Thus, it is my pleasure to announce the engagement of Professor Severus Snape, to Miss Hermione Granger."  
  
The students sat in stunned silence for moment before the Slytherins began whooping and applauding for their Head of House. The Gryffindors, many of whom were Hermione's old friends, overcame their astonishment and rose to their feet to heartily applaud them as well. Before long, the entire hall had erupted into cheers and whistles among the round of fierce applause. It soon became obvious by the catcalls and the stamping of feet that the students would not settle down until the couple kissed.  
  
Hermione turned to Severus and flashed him a radiant smile, squeezing his hand as she met his eyes. Severus hesitated for a moment, but knew that if he wanted this debacle to be over with, he had no choice. He grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet, reaching up to caress her cheek as he leaned in and hesitantly captured her lips with his own. The cheers only got louder as Hermione leaned in to deepen the kiss, and to his surprise, Severus got caught up in the moment as well. They had become oblivious to the atmosphere around them, not pulling away from each other until they heard a gentle, "ahem" behind them. Hermione blushed as she broke away from Severus, who was looking quite flushed himself. They turned to look at the staff, only to see Minerva trying to hide a satisfied smirk as she leaned over to Albus, "You owe me ten galleons," they heard her whisper.  
  
"Ten galleons?" a bemused Hermione asked.  
  
"Tell me, what exactly were you betting on?" Severus scowled at her.  
  
"You," Minerva chuckled.  
  
"Me?"  
  
"Whether you'd have the nerve to kiss her, like THAT, in front of the students," Albus replied.  
  
"Albus thought you'd give her a peck on the cheek... but I knew you had it in you," Minerva smirked, "Easiest money I've ever made," she continued as she rose to her feet and kissed him on the cheek, bringing on another round of catcalls from the students.  
  
"Alas! I've lost another ten galleons!" Albus shook his head in mock disappointment.  
  
Severus whirled towards him, "Now what?" he scoffed.  
  
"I bet Minerva that SHE wouldn't kiss YOU in front of the students," the Headmaster chuckled.  
  
Severus shook his head and didn't even bother to reply as he returned his attention to Hermione. He was more than ready to get out of there, but there was a line of students forming to step up and congratulate them. He sighed as he slumped back into his chair... it was mostly Hermione's friends who had come forward, so he would let her handle this on her own. Only a few dared to reach across the table and shake his hand... for though some of them had begun to warm up to the Potions Master since the war, there was still an undercurrent of fear in his presence.  
  
As the line dwindled down, Severus sighed and rose to his feet and grabbed Hermione's arm, "Don't you think it's time to go?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
Severus had already planned his excuse, "Samuel..."  
  
Hermione cut him off, "Is perfectly fine. He looks quite content with my mother and Remus."  
  
Severus growled as Hermione laughed, "Fine. Fine, let's go!" He left her to say her final goodbyes as he walked to the other end of the table to retrieve their son. By the time he had returned, the students were dispersing. Severus grabbed Hermione's arm and directed her to the side passage out of the hall. Before they emerged into the corridor, Hermione turned to him and backed him to the wall. She leaned in over their son, pulling Severus' head down to kiss him tenderly.  
  
"That wasn't so bad, was it?"  
  
He scowled, "Obviously not for you. I, however, do not intend to ever make a spectacle of myself in front of a large crowd ever again!"  
  
Hermione laughed, "I'm afraid you've got no choice.."  
  
"Ha! And how do you intend to convince me to do otherwise?"  
  
"If you can not bear to kiss me in public, then I'm afraid that we can not have any guests at our wedding," she pouted.  
  
"Oh," he frowned, "Would that be so bad?"  
  
Hermione gasped as she whirled away, "Severus Snape! You'd better think about what you've just said!" she called over her shoulder as she hurried along in front of him.  
  
Severus sighed as he shook his head in resignation, and just as a smile began to tug at the corners of his mouth, he heard Hermione shriek as she exited the passageway into the corridor. 


	36. Wedding Plans

Chapter 35 ~ Wedding Plans  
  
Author's note: Sorry this is a short chapter... it didn't quite fit in with the last one, and was too long to add onto the next one (the wedding chapter!). Anyway... not much action here, but I couldn't just skip straight to the wedding without tying up a few loose ends and adding some details of the wedding plans.  
  
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Rushing forward to see what was wrong, Severus exited the passageway to find Hermione with her arms flung around her two best friends. He sighed in frustration as he stepped forward.  
  
"Potter... Weasley," he spoke sharply, "To what do we owe this..." he had to hold back a sneer as he continued, "pleasure?"  
  
Hermione winked at her friends as she backed away. Harry stepped forward and extended his hand as he nodded to Severus, "Professor Snape." Ron had a harder time holding back a scowl as he extended his hand to his former professor.  
  
Hermione broke the tension as she smiled at Ron and Harry, "I'm so glad to see both of you! Why don't you come back to my quarters?"  
  
Harry's green eyes sparkled in amusement as Ron glared at Severus. It was Harry who finally replied, "We'd be delighted!"  
  
*****  
  
Ron's eyes grew wide when they entered Hermione's quarters, "Hermione!" he gasped as he looked around. He had never been in her private quarters, and was amazed at the opulence. Harry chuckled in amusement, "Different from the accomadations they provided us with at training, isn't it? Maybe we should have become Potions apprentices," he winked at Hermione, who couldn't help but laugh at Severus' as he groaned and walked out of the room, leaving the three of them to chat while he dressed Samuel for bed.  
  
"Surly as ever, isn't he?" Ron glared at the door even after Severus had left.  
  
"Honestly, Ron! He isn't that bad! Only around the students..."  
  
"We're not his students!" Ron growled indignantly.  
  
Hermione sighed. How would she ever tell them the news if Ron couldn't let go of his dislike for Severus? She closed her eyes as she inhaled deeply and began, "Ron...Harry..." she hesitated before she continued, "er... well, maybe it's better if I just come right out and tell you..."  
  
Harry reached out and grabbed her hand, "What is it, Hermione?"  
  
"Er... well... you know how Severus and I were trying to work things out for Samuel's sake?"  
  
"Yes... and it looks as though you're getting along quite well," Harry smiled as Ron continued to mumble under his breath.  
  
"Well, yes... we are... better than you could ever know, Harry." She turned to Ron, "Ron... please, listen to me."  
  
He looked into her eyes, finally gracing her with a gentle smile, "Sorry, Hermione."  
  
"Quite all right," she replied. "Anyway... yes, we've worked things out. And we're..." she sighed, "very much in love."  
  
Ron and Harry looked at each other and shrugged before turning back to Hermione, "So, what else is new?"  
  
"What else...?" Hermione gasped, "You knew?"  
  
"Honestly, Hermione!" Ron laughed as he immitated his best friend, "Don't you remember who my sister is?"  
  
"Oh! I didn't think that Ginny might have told you already," she giggled.  
  
"She only told us what she suspected, months ago! But what she didn't tell us about," Harry paused as he grabbed Hermione's hand, "was this!" He looked closely at her ring, "When is the wedding?"  
  
"Merlin, Hermione! You're actually going to marry that greasy bat?" Ron's mouth gaped in astonishment.  
  
Hermione admonished him, "That 'greasy bat' is my fiancee, Ron. Get used to it!"  
  
Ron sighed as he reached out and hugged her, "That greasy bat is a lucky man, Hermione." As he pulled away, he looked into her eyes, "Are you happy?"  
  
"More than you could ever imagine," she sighed.  
  
"Then we're happy for you," Harry told her as he stepped forward to hug her.  
  
"What are you doing next Saturday?" Hermione smiled.  
  
"Next Saturday?! So soon?"  
  
"Well, we've been planning it since April. We were just waiting until the students went home... and more importantly, until you two could be here. I couldn't get married without my best friends."  
  
*****  
  
Hermione spent the rest of the week in a whirlwind of activity. Planning a wedding in so short a time was no easy feat. They had decided to keep it as simple as possible, so all they needed to do was pick out their wedding attire, the rings, and send out invitations. They wanted to keep it as intimate as possible, and neither of them had any family to speak of other than Elizabeth, so the guest list consisted only of the Hogwarts staff, the Weasley family, Harry and Ron, and a few members of the Order. Even on such short notice, all had replied that they would attend, with the exception of a few of the older Weasley children. Bill had returned to work in Egypt, Charlie was still in Romania, and Percy had never quite made amends with his family.  
  
Elizabeth and Ginny accompanied Hermione to pick out her gown, as well as their own dresses. They were very secretive about the results of their "girls day out", and had to sneak their purchases into Hermione's quarters, warding her wardrobe to assure that nobody could see Hermione's wedding gown. Severus groaned about Hermione not wanting him to wear his usual black dress robes. For one day, she didn't want him to wear all black. In the end, Elizabeth ended up going with Remus and Severus to pick out something appropriate that would please Hermione. When they returned that evening, Severus refused to tell Hermione what they had purchased. After all, if she could have a secret, so could he.  
  
The one purchase that they did make together was their set of wedding bands. Severus returned to the same fine jewelery shop where he had purchased Hermione's engagement ring, knowing that they had matching bands. Hers was a slim platinum band that nestled against the contours of her engagement ring, and Severus' was a wider platinum band with the same etched design. They handed the rings over to Remus, as he was the best man, for safekeeping.  
  
All in all, everything was falling together nicely.  
  
Friday evening, the staff had insisted on having an engagement dinner for the couple. Severus tried to put his foot down, but there was no chance in changing Minerva's mind once she and Albus set to work on the plans. It was a small affair... with only the staff, Elizabeth and Ginny in attendance. After the dinner, Remus and Albus insisted on taking Severus out for a few drinks. He sighed in resignation as they made their way into the village and spent an evening in the pub.  
  
After a few drinks, Severus relaxed and was actually quite glad that he had relented and let the men take him out for the evening, even if it did mean listening to Remus and Albus give him advice. What did these two men know about marriage? But Severus sat back and let them have their fun, grateful for the distraction, knowing that If he had remained back at the school, he would have gone mad, pacing his quarters all night long. He hoped that, after a few more drinks, he would be relaxed enough to get some sleep.  
  
When their last round of drinks for the evening was served, Albus raised his glass as he said to Severus, "Look not mournfully into the past, It comes not back again, Wisely improve the present it is thine, Go forth to meet thy shadowy future, Without fear and with a manly heart."  
  
For the first time that evening, Severus truly appreciated Albus' wisdom, and he raised his glass in return to Albus as they drank to the future.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione's mother and Ginny had a last minute personal bridal shower, where they presented her with small gifts. Hermione gasped as she opened the box that her mother gave her. It was an elegant pair of diamond ear studs, and Hermione recognized them as the ones that her father had given to her mother on their first anniversary.  
  
"Oh, Mum! I couldn't possibly..."  
  
"Hermione... I want you to have them. You need something to remind you of your father on your wedding day. I only wish he could be here to see his little girl... he would be so proud of you," her voice dropped to a hoarse whisper as she dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief.  
  
Ginny's present to Hermione was a delicate lace garter, with a rose pattern embroidered in gold silk threads. She smiled at Ginny as she gasped, "Did you make this?" Ginny smiled as she nodded in reply, "I didn't know if you had one, and I wanted to give you something personal... a keepsake to remember your wedding day."  
  
"It's perfect!" Hermione sniffed as she hugged her friend.  
  
Before long, Hermione had decided that it was time to retire for the night, even though she knew that she would have a hard time falling asleep without Severus by her side. After relaxing by the fire with a glass of wine, she finally nodded off into a deep sleep, and spent the night dreaming of the life that she would begin the next day, as Severus' wife. 


	37. A Family at Last

Author's Note: First: I'd like to apologize for the quality of the last chapter. Upon re-reading it, I wish I had fleshed it out a bit more. I may end up re-writing it one of these days... I wouldn't change anything important, just add a bit more detail to it.  
  
Second: The wedding ceremony and vows, and Samuel's naming ceremony are made up of bits and pieces of many different ceremonies that I have researched. I take no credit, in whole or in part, for writing them. All I did was take what I needed and weave it all together to suit the purposes of this story.  
  
Third: From the the time I began writing this story, I have envisioned exactly what I wanted Hermione's wedding dress to look like. I had trouble getting it in to writing, so I looked up a few dresses to aid me in my descriptions. It wasn't easy to find, but eventually I came across somehting that is nearly identical to what I had imagined. If you'd like to see the photos that all of the dress descriptions are based on, I'll be posting the links at my Yahoo group (and I posted a link to "Hermione's Ring" there, as well, if you'd like to see it.)  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione was jittery on Saturday morning. For the most part, she had been calm and collected all week, but now... she felt the urge to throw up her breakfast. On top of the nerves and the nausea, she was also missing Severus. Her mother insisted that the groom must not see the bride before the wedding, and had spent the night in Hermione's room to make sure that they honored the tradition.  
  
After a light breakfast in her quarters with her mother and Ginny, Samuel had finally fallen asleep for his morning nap, and Ginny and Elizabeth helped Hermione to begin preparing for the ceremony. They arranged her hair in elaborate ringlets, gathering it at the crown of her head in a wreath of delicate flowers, allowing a few tendrils to remain loose, delicately framing her face as the rest cascaded down her back. Hermione needed little make-up, as her flawless complexion and rosy cheeks needed no enhancement. She dabbed a bit of sheer gloss onto her full pink lips, and added a slight dusting of shadow to her eyes, and a translucent shimmering powder to the apples of her cheekbones. She sat there feeling nervous, all made up, wearing nothing but her dressing gown, as Elizabeth and Ginny dressed themselves and fixed each other's hair.  
  
After discussing it with Severus earlier in the week, Hermione had asked Ginny to be Samuel's Godmother. As such, she had purchased a lovely dress for her to wear for the occasion. The full length short sleeved underdress was a soft aqua colored satin, and had an overdress of soft white. The style of the dress flattered Ginny's girlish figure, while the color flattered her pale complexion and red hair, which fell in smooth waves down her back.  
  
Elizabeth had chosen a dress that was reminiscent of the one she had worn to the Valentine's Day ball. It was the same basic style and similar flowy fabric, periwinkle blue in color, that draped to her ankles. It had an overdress of white lace, with long flaring sheer sleeves, and she wore her hair twisted into a sophisticated knot at the nape of her neck. Hermione beamed with pride at her mother... she had never seen her look more radiant than she did that day. She only wished that her father could be here to see her as well.   
  
Amazingly, and to Hermione's relief, she did not cry that morning. Through all of the emotional turmoil of the past months, she often found herself crying over everything. She had thought she had overcome that some time ago, but now it had returned full-force, and had been especially bad the past week or two. She was grateful that her eyes remained dry that morning, as she was sure to shed tears when she exchanged vows with Severus that afternoon, and didn't want to go into it already with a tearstained face and a runny nose.  
  
Samuel woke just as they put on their finishing touches, and Hermione hurried to feed him and get him dressed before sending him off with Ginny. By the time the child had his fill, Hermione had little more than one hour to finish dressing, and was beginning to feel the urge to retch again. How would she ever get through this? She could barely keep her hands from trembling as she tried to concentrate on dressing her son. She dressed him in a small white short-pants suit, and handed Ginny his tiny dress robes. She didn't want him fully dressed yet, as she didn't want to worry about him messing his pure white outfit. After giving her son one last kiss, she handed him to Ginny and bid them both goodbye.  
  
As she stood there taking deep breaths, trying to keep from heaving, her mother walked up behind her and placed a hand on her shoulder, "Hermione?" she asked, sounding concerned.  
  
Hermione turned to face her mother, laughing nervously, "I'll be fine, Mum."  
  
"Ready to get dressed?" Elizabeth smiled as she put her arm around her daughter.  
  
"Yes," Hermione smiled for a moment before paling visibly, covering her mouth she choked, "No..." and ran to the bathroom. Elizabeth followed and watched in concern as Hermione leaned her head against the basin. "Hermione..." she handed her a glass of water from the sink, and leaned over to rub her back soothingly. "I'll be fine, Mum. Besides, I think that was the last of my breakfast," she smiled.  
  
"Wash your face, Hermione... and I'll help you redo your makeup after you dress."  
  
Hermione did feel much better after getting it all out of her system and splashing cool water on her face. Her hair was mussed, but it was nothing that couldn't be fixed. Elizabeth helped her into her dress before sitting her down and adjusting her hair. After re-applying the little makeup that she had washed off, she began to feel much more at ease.  
  
Finally, it was time. She took one last deep breath to assure herself that she would not retch again before they walked out of the room.  
  
*****  
  
"Calm down, Severus!" Remus chastised for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning, as he finised dressing, "You've only got an hour to go."  
  
"Only an hour!" Severus scoffed as he continued to pace his quarters, "I've been waiting all morning!"  
  
"Would a drink make you feel better?" Remus asked as he reached for a bottle of brandy.  
  
"No! I don't need that vile liquid to calm down," he spat, even as he accepted the glass that Remus handed him. He slumped into a chair by the fire, swirling the amber liquid around in his glass without drinking it.  
  
"I told you it was too early to dress, Severus. Now you've got to pass another hour with nothing to do," Remus laughed. Severus had dressed nearly immediately after breakfast, and had nagged Remus to get ready as well.  
  
"I need to see her, Remus..." Severus shot to his feet and headed for the door, only to be intercepted by his best man.  
  
"Not so fast, Severus. Elizabeth has probably had Hermione ward the door, anyway," Remus chuckled, "Even if you did get in, you'd never get past the mother of the bride!"  
  
"I need to know that she's here! That she hasn't decided that she's making a mistake by marrying me!"  
  
"Why would she?" Remus tried to calm him.  
  
"Why wouldn't she? After all, she could do much better than a boorish Potions Master twice her age."  
  
"Now Severus... you know that is absolutely not true. She loves you, and you are the only one she would ever want," Remus chuckled as he continued, "Just a few short months ago, I would never have believed it... but Severus, Hermione could not find a man better than you even if she wanted to, because you are the best man for her."  
  
"I need to get out of here," Severus sighed as he rubbed his hand wearily over his eyes.  
  
Remus made a final adjustment to his navy blue dress robes before he turned to Severus, "Let's take a walk then!" he clapped Severus on the back as he opened the door, peeking out first to make sure that the bride-to-be was nowhere in sight. He popped his head back in and smiled, "I think there's someone out her you might like to see..."  
  
Severus shot past him, hoping to catch a glimpse of Hermione. Instead, he came face to face with Ginny Weasley, who was carrying Samuel. For the first time that morning, Severus smiled, and he reached out to hold his son. Samuel had an immediate calming effect on his father, who insisted on accompanying Ginny to the Great Hall so he could spend a few last minutes with his son. They all entered the Hall together to be greeted by the guests who had already arrived. They were all to gather in the Hall before heading outside together, to the clearing in the forest where the ceremony would take place.   
  
Severus relieved Ginny of her duties for the time being, opting to dress his son himself, just so he would have something to pass the time and make him feel useful. After he dressed Samuel in his robes, he gave him one last kiss before handing him back over to Ginny, who joined the other guests and walked outside, following Albus to the clearing in the forest where Severus and Hermione would be exchanging their vows.  
  
Besides Severus and Hermione, nobody knew the significance of the location they had chosen. Remus and Albus both had suspiscions, but otherwise, it was their secret. They could think of no better place to bind themselves to each other than the very location where they had conceived their son... the same place where, one year later, they finally confessed their love to each other.  
  
Severus and Remus followed a few minutes later, after the guests had taken their positions in a circle around the spot where Hermione and Severus would take their vows. Severus nervously looked around at the crowd of smiling faces gathered before him as he and Remus entered the circle.  
  
Remus walked by Severus side to the center of the clearing, and they were barely in place as they heard whispers of excitement all around them. Severus turned and strained to see Hermione as she walked into the clearing behind her mother, his eyes shining in appreciation of what he saw. She was dressed in a sleeveless gown of ivory colored crushed velvet, which flowed delicately to her ankles. Attached at the shoulders was a cape of sheer white with golden embroidery. Her glorious hair was tied up in a wreath of flowers, and fell down her back in a cascade of ringlets. The soft summer breeze was gently blowing a few loose tendrils around her face, which was glowing radiantly. As she stepped forward, carrying a simple boquet of three large calla lillies nestled into a cascade of ivy, she seemed to float rather than walk to him, and he knew that he had never seen anything so beautiful in his entire life.  
  
*****  
  
Hermione kept inhaling deep calming breaths as she and her mother made her way across the school grounds to the clearing in the forest. The fresh air helped to keep the nausea at bay, and as they approached the gathering of friends, she looked to her mother and smiled as she nodded. This was it... and she was ready. As they entered the clearing, her mother walked ahead of her, clearing the way for her daughter. Hermione paused for a moment as she looked ahead. She barely took any notice of their guests, as her eyes locked with Severus'. He looked so handsome, in his elegant black dress robes trimmed with gold silk embroidery. It was clasped at the neck rather than buttoned all the way down, revealing an matte gold silk shirt underneath, and black trousers. The minute she saw him, she forgot about her nerves as she began to walk towards him. She felt as though she were walking on air as she glided across the clearing to stand by his side. When he reached out to grasp her hand, she gasped in relief. They were finally together again, and ready to take their vows.  
  
Albus' looked upon them, smiling at them with his twinkling eyes as he began:  
  
"Marriage is a supreme sharing of experience, and an adventure in the most intimate of human relationships. It is the joyous union of two people whose friendship and mutual understanding have flowered in romance. Today Severus and Hermione proclaim their love and commitment to the world, and we gather here to rejoice, with and for them, in the new life they now undertake together."  
  
They were lost in each other's eyes, and hardly heard a word that Albus spoke until he nodded to Hermione, signalling her to recite her vows.  
  
Hermione's eyes misted over and her voice trembled as she began to speak, "Severus, our miracle lies in the path we have chosen together. I enter this marriage with you knowing that the true magic of love is not to avoid changes, but to navigate them successfully. Let us commit to the miracle of making each day work - together. Whatever lies ahead, good or bad, we will face together."   
  
Severus' couldn't hide the emotion in his voice as he began his vows to Hermione, "Hermione, where there has been cold, you have brought warmth; where my life was dark, you have brought light. Let us make of our two lives, one life, and let us always honor and respect each other."  
  
Remus stepped forward and handed their rings to Albus, who spoke as he held them in his outstretched hands, "These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end, no giver and no receiver for each is the giver and each is the receiver. May these rings always remind you of the vows you have taken."   
  
Severus smiled at Hermione, her hands trembling as she slipped his ring onto his finger, "Severus, look to me for all the days to come; today I take my place as your wife."  
  
The tears were flowing freely down Hermione's face as Severus gently placed the ring on her finger, "Hermione, look to me for all the days to come; today I take my place as your husband."  
  
Hermione choked back a sob as she and Severus recited together, "Distance may test us for a time, and time may try us. But if we look to each other first, we will always see a friend."  
  
They grasped each other's hands tightly as Albus concluded, "Severus and Hermione, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure."  
  
He turned to Severus, his eyes twinkling as he said, "You may kiss your bride."  
  
Hermione beamed at Severus as he reached out to pull her towards him. He clutched her to him, and she clung to him just as tightly as they sealed their union with a kiss. Severus could feel Hermione shaking as his lips claimed hers, and he could taste her tears, which mingled with his own. They reluctantly pulled apart a moment later, to the applause of those who had gathered to witness their marriage. As they turned to face their friends, Ginny approaching them with Samuel in her arms. Hermione reached out to her son, pulling Samuel close to her as Severus pulled them both into an intimate embrace.  
  
Ginny stepped aside, moving over to stand next to Remus. As Samuel's godparents, they would play an important part in the naming ceremony that was to follow.  
  
Albus looked into the crowd as he spoke, "We also gather here today to witness this new couple's commitment to parenthood and to officially welcome their son. We are here because of our relationship with them, for we are their circle of people. We are their extended family and friends and we honor their commitment to this child, who has changed their lives forever."  
  
He turned to look at Severus and Hermione as he continued, "The greatest act of love parents have to give their children is the love they express for one another. The interactions between a mother and father, husband and wife, form the web of the relationship that serves as the child's nest. Children learn about men and women, communication, caring, respect, feelings, conflict, and love by watching their parents."  
  
"Do you, Severus and Hermione, give yourselves to your son as his parents, promising to act out of your love for him, respecting and supporting his uniqueness, and eliciting the best from him?"  
  
"We do," they replied in unison, before passing Samuel to Remus and Ginny.  
  
Albus looked back out among the guests as he continued, "The circle of friends gathered here are his people. As he comes of age, we will appear to him as part of his world. He will look among us for companionship and leadership and to all of us for support. By watching us, he will learn how life works."  
  
"The child's parents have chosen godparents to speak on behalf of their circle of friends. Remus and Virginia, do you pledge to support this child, to respect his uniqueness, and to elicit the best from him and this family?"  
  
"We do."  
  
"How shall this child be called?" Albus turned to Hermione as Samuel was passed back into her arms.  
  
"Samuel Remus Snape," she replied as she smiled down at her son.  
  
"On behalf of all who shall know him, with the hope that he finds among us all the nourishment he needs, I welcome Samuel Remus Snape."  
  
Severus reached out to pull Hermione and Samuel to him once again, placing a gentle kiss on Samuel's brow before leaning in to kiss Hermione once more. When he pulled back, he and Hermione looked down at their son in adoration. They were finally a family. 


	38. Reception

Author's note: Again, I borrowed a few snippets of passages from various ceremonies, using them to suit the purpose of this story.  
  
Thank you to my readers and reviewers!  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 37 ~ Reception  
  
Hermione and Severus turned to each other for one more kiss before they turned to receive their friends.  
  
Severus reached up to cup Hermione's face as he tenderly brushed a tear from the corner of her eye, "You're so beautiful..." he murmured.  
  
"So are you," Hermione smiled, "I love you."  
  
"Thank you," he whispered.  
  
"For what? It's the truth, you ARE beautiful, Severus."  
  
"No... Thank you for loving me. Thank you for becoming my wife. Thank you..." he paused and briefly closed his eyes as he continued, "for making me happier than I have any right to be. I love you, Hermione."  
  
As their guests closed in on them, Hermione handed Samuel to Ginny, who stood by her side. Elizabeth and Remus were the first to step forward to congratulate them. Tearfully, Elizabeth reached to embrace her daughter, "Hermione!" she cried before turning to embrace Severus as well, "Severus..." she couldn't speak as she choked up with tears. Severus returned the embrace and smiled fondly at Elizabeth as she backed away and rasped, "I love you... both of you..."  
  
Remus stepped forward next. Hugging Hermione first, he whispered to her, "You look absolutely radiant, Hermione..."  
  
She blushed as she replied, "You look quite handsome, yourself, Remus." As he broke away, she continued, "Thank you for everything you have done for me... for all of us, Remus. I love you."  
  
Remus' eyes were shining with tears as he leaned in and kissed her cheek, "I love you too, child." He turned to Severus and extended his hand, "You're a lucky man, Severus Snape. But, I don't think I need to tell you that," he smiled.  
  
"No, you don't... I already know it!" Severus smiled as he glanced to his wife and back. He grasped Remus hand tightly, "Thank you, Remus. You have been my best man in every sense of the word," he said, his eyes shining with sincerity. Remus was taken aback for a moment... truly shocked to hear a compliment coming from Severus.  
  
"Any time, Severus... any time," Remus smiled as he clapped Severus on the back before stepping aside and taking his place in the receiving line, putting his arm around Elizabeth as he stood by her side.  
  
One by one, they greeted and thanked their guests for coming. Hermione heard Severus groan as he saw the Weasley clan approach. Harry was with them. Mr. Weasley smiled jovially at them as he hugged Hermione and shook Severus' hand, congratulating both of them. Mrs. Weasley was dabbing her eyes with a handkerchief as she embraced Hermione, "Look at you, Hermione! I can hardly believe it..." her eyes darted to Ginny and Samuel, "and your son is beautiful!"  
  
"Thank you, Mrs. Weasley! You don't know how much it means to me that you are here..." she paused as she looked at Ron's family, "All of you!"  
  
Fred and George leaned in on either side of Hermione and kissed her simultaneously, one on each cheek.  
  
"I can't believe our little brother didn't snatch you up years ago!" said Fred.  
  
"Ron's loss!" George smirked, shrugging his shoulders as Hermione laughed.   
  
They both turned stepped forward to approach Severus, who was looking rather suspisciously at them. One could never know what to expect of the Weasley twins.  
  
"Don't worry, Professor Snape..."  
  
"We aren't going to kiss you..."  
  
Severus looked relieved as they each reached out in turn to shake his hand, "Congratulations, Professor Snape," they spoke in unison before walking away.  
  
After they walked away, Ron and Harry stepped forward. Ron leaned in and embraced Hermione. She was surprised as he lifted her off of the ground and spun her around, before planting a kiss on her cheek, "They're right, you know... my loss... but, who knew?" he sighed as he turned to Severus. Hermione gaped in shock as he smiled and extended his hand. It was the first time she had seen him address Severus civily without reluctance. She was so distracted by Ron, she almost forgot that Harry was standing there.  
  
She heard him clear his throat, and turned to see his brilliant green eyes smiling at her. He hugged her just as enthusiastically as Ron had, but refrained from sweeping her off her feet. He planted a kiss on her forehead as he smiled, "I knew," he whispered mischievously, "Even if Ron never admitted it. But, he's truly happy for you... we both are!" he turned to Severus and grasped his hand tightly, "Good luck, Professor Snape."  
  
Hermione leaned in to Severus as she watched her two best friends move on down the line to greet Remus and Elizabeth, who were now holding Samuel as Ginny had joined them to greet her brother and Harry. Their acceptance of Severus was the best wedding gift they ever could have given her, and she smiled brilliantly as Ron and Harry both cooed over Samuel. Her eyes grew wide as Ginny took Samuel back into her arms, and Harry put his arm around the young woman as they made their way over to catch up with the rest of the Weasley family. She smirked, wondering if they were finally going to become closer than just friends.   
  
The line eventually dwindled down, and Minerva and Albus brought up the rear. Minerva went first, embracing Hermione and sniffling as she said, "I never would have guessed you would be the one to finally bring joy to Severus' life. He's a good man, Hermione. You're a very lucky woman."  
  
"I know," Hermione rasped as she smiled at her mentor.  
  
Minerva reached forward to hug Severus, kissing him on the cheek as she said, "I wish you all the happiness in the world, Severus. You deserve it!"   
  
To her surprise, he kissed her back, "Thank you, Minerva. I don't know why, but you have always shown faith in me. I don't think I've ever told you how much I appreciate your friendship."  
  
Minerva smiled lovingly at him, "And I, yours. I am truly happy that you've found somebody to love, Severus. More importantly, somebody who loves you just as much in return."  
  
Albus stepped forward and smiled at both of them, taking one of each of their hands into his own as he spoke to them as one, quoting, "When two people are at one in their inmost hearts, they shatter even the strength of iron or of bronze."  
  
He stepped back and smiled, "A carriage awaits you to bring you back to the castle. We'll be waiting for you there."  
  
Severus and Hermione followed him out of the clearing, where their guests were lined up on either side of the path to wish them well as they boarded the carriage. Severus held Hermione's hand and assisted her as she stepped up before boarding the carriage himself. When he sat down next to her, he pulled her close so she could rest her head on his shoulder as they pulled away. Hermione gasped in delight as a flock of white doves took to the air behind them, "I didn't know about that!" she giggled.  
  
"Neither did I." Severus chuckled, "Most likely Albus' doing."  
  
Hermione lifted her head from his shoulder and he tilted his head to kiss her passionately. He had been wanting to kiss her that way all day, and his hands laced through her hair as he held her tightly to him. They let the carriage carry them around the whole of the school grounds, allowing them to be alone as husband and wife for the first time.  
  
"Kiss me like that again..." Hermione whispered.  
  
Severus growled playfully as he began nibbling her ear before trailing tender kisses down her neck, to her shoulders, and across her collarbone before he gently sucked the tender area at the base of her throat.  
  
"Severus..." Hermione groaned, "No... I can't show up at our reception with lovebites on my neck..."  
  
"Then let's not show up at all."  
  
She playfully pushed him away, "Severus! Please..."  
  
He sighed as he tenderly nibbled his way back up to her ear, "I can't help it, Hermione. You look so... so beautiful... and amazingly sexy in that dress..."  
  
"Well then, perhaps I should take it off," she teased, "change into somthing..."  
  
"No!" he groaned as he cut her off. "No... I want to be the one to take it off... tonight..." he murmured as he continued to nibble her ear.  
  
"Severus!" she mock chastised him, "You dirty old man!"  
  
"Old?" he quirked an eyebrow and laughed, "You're only as old as you feel... and Merlin, Hermione! You make me feel like a randy teenager sometimes! I can't get enough of you..." he sighed as he tilted her head towards him so he could capture her lips once more.  
  
"Hermione..." he groaned in frustration as she pulled away.  
  
"Tonight, Severus," she smiled mischievously, "And I will make sure that it is worth the wait."  
  
*****  
  
By the time Hermione and Severus reached the castle, everybody had gathered in the gardens for the reception. Remus and Elizabeth were waiting as they pulled up, and Hermione smiled as she saw that they were holding Samuel. They approached the carriage and passed Samuel into Severus' arms. "We thought you might need some time alone with your son," Elizabeth smiled, "Besides, I think he's hungry."  
  
"Thank you, Elizabeth," Severus replied as he passed Samuel to Hermione.  
  
"We'll be waiting in the gardens!" she called over her shoulder as she joined Remus, walking away with him arm in arm.  
  
Severus turned to Hermione, who had already partially lowered her gown to hold Samuel to her breast. He laughed, "You didn't waste any time."  
  
"Neither would you if you knew how sore I am from not nursing him all afternoon."  
  
He leaned in and kissed her, "Is it that bad?"  
  
She sighed, "It's bearable..." a small smile played on her lips before she continued, "but it would have put a damper on our... activities tonight."  
  
"We wouldn't want that," he laughed as he slipped an arm around her, leaning in to kiss her hair as his other hand reached down to caress his son's back.  
  
"What arrangements have you made for our son tonight?"  
  
Hermione smirked, "Mum and Remus."  
  
"Taking him to the cottage?" he asked.  
  
"Mmm... no. Mum's taking one of the visitor's quarters for the night. She'll be right here in the castle."  
  
Hermione continued to nurse Samuel as she sat in the circle of Severus' arms. They both felt so content there, bonding with their son, enjoying their first moments together as a family. When Samuel had nursed to his content, and had fallen asleep, Hermione handed him to Severus as she readjusted her dress. She took his hand as she eased herself out of the carriage, and reached out for Samuel as Severus stepped down. They slowly made their way together to join their circle of friends for the evening.  
  
Hermione handed Samuel to Ginny as they entered the gardens to a round of fierce applause. With a single clap of his hands, Albus conjured trays carrying flutes of champagne, which floated among the guests. He handed a silver goblet to Hermione and Severus. After everybody had a glass in hand, Remus stepped forward to make a toast, "When the one man loves the one woman and the one woman loves the one man, the angels desert heaven and sit in that hour and sing for joy." He paused and raised his glass, "Severus and Hermione, may your every hour be filled with the song of the angels."  
  
As one, their circle of friends raised their glasses to Severus and Hermione. Hermione sipped from the wedding cup before handing it to Severus. After each of them had taken a sip, Elizabeth stepped forward to stand beside Remus. She had prepared a passage to recite for the occasion, "Love one another, but make not a bond of that love. Let it rather be like a moving sea between the shores of your souls. And stand together, and yet not too near together. For even the pillars of the temple must stand apart; and the oak tree and the cypress will not grow in each other's shadow. Remember that love gives nothing but from itself. Love possesses not, nor would it be possessed, for love is sufficient unto love. And think not that you can direct the course of love. For love, if it finds you worthy, will direct your course."  
  
Tearfully, Hermione smiled at her mother and whispered to Severus, "One of my parents' favorite passages... they used it in their own wedding ceremony. They lived by those words."  
  
"As will we," Severus murmured as he kissed her.  
  
Albus clapped his hands once more, and enchanted music began to play all around them. Hermione turned to Severus as he swept her into his arms, and their bodies moved gracefully together in an intimate dance. Hermione smiled as she leaned her head on his shoulder, "I didn't think you liked, or even knew how, to dance like this."  
  
He laughed as he replied, "Remember our first dance?"  
  
"Hmmm... yes. How could I ever forget? But, it was different..."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"The music..." she sighed, "We made our own..."  
  
"I hope we always will," he rasped.  
  
"Me too," Hermione pulled back and tilted her head up to face him. He crushed his lips to hers, forgetting about the dozens of people in their midst. He didn't even care anymore... at least for today. Hermione was his wife, and he wanted the whole world to know it. "My wife..." he murmured, "Hermione Snape."  
  
"Mmmm... I like the sound of that," Hermione smiled and kissed him again as she murmured, "My husband..."  
  
Oblivious to anything and everything around them, they didn't hear Ginny approach with Samuel until she cleared her throat, "I think your son is feeling left out," she smiled as she held the child out to them. Hermione pulled back and smiled as she reached for their son. They held him between them as Severus put his arms around both of them, and they continued to dance as a family.  
  
By the time that they parted, they had danced Samuel back to sleep. Madame Pomfrey had stepped forward to volunteer her time with the child, so that Ginny could enjoy a bit of freedom to dance that evening. As Severus tried to sweep Hermione back into his arms on the dance floor, somebody tapped on his shoulder. Surprised, he whirled around to find Remus and Elizabeth smiling at them.  
  
"May I?" asked Remus as he held his hand out to Hermione. Severus nodded and swept his arm out, gesturing Remus to have a dance with Hermione, before turning to Elizabeth and holding his hand out to her. "It would be my pleasure, Severus," Elizabeth spoke before he even asked.  
  
"Severus," Elizabeth smiled at him, "I never would have suspected that Hermione would end up with a man like you. I wasn't so sure about it at first. But now that I know you... I couldn't be happier. I know I've said it before, but I want you to know that I think you are a good man, Severus. Hermione couldn't have asked for better."  
  
Severus smiled, "You don't know how much that means to me, Elizabeth. Not many parents would take kindly to a young woman like Hermione marrying a man like myself."  
  
"A man like yourself?" she asked.  
  
Severus sighed, "Elizabeth... there are things... many things... that you don't know about my past."  
  
"You would be surprised, Severus, if you knew how much I DO know about you."  
  
He raised an eyebrow in question and Elizabeth continued, "Like I said... I wasn't so sure about you at first. But over time, Remus told me everything that I needed to know about you. About your past. And most importantly, how you overcame that past. When I returned here in February, and got to know you better, I could see that he was right about you. He thinks highly of you, Severus."  
  
"He does?" Severus asked in surprise.  
  
"I know you've had your differences, Severus. But now, Remus is proud to call you a friend. And I am proud to call you my son-in-law."  
  
He leaned in and kissed her cheek as the song ended, "And it is my pleasure to call you... both of you... my family."  
  
They pulled away from each other, and she held on to his arm as they walked over to Remus and Hermione, exchanging dance partners once again. As Hermione was swept back into Severus' arms, he said, "Remus is a lucky man, Hermione. Your mother is very much in love with him."  
  
"I know," Hermione smiled as she looked to where Remus was holding her mother close in his arms, "And I couldn't be happier for them."  
  
They looked around at the other couples on the dance floor, and Hermione smiled as she saw Ginny dancing with Harry. Severus smirked, "I think Harry may have learned a lesson from Weasley's mistakes. I almost made the same mistake... it took almost losing you for me to realize what was right in front of my eyes," he shuddered as kissed her on the temple, "I'm glad I came to my senses."  
  
"So am I..." Hermione rasped. She smirked and whispered, "You called him Harry..."  
  
"Did I?" he feigned shock.  
  
"Does that mean he can call you Severus?" she laughed as Severus feigned a scowl.  
  
*****  
  
They danced all evening in each others' arms, until the sun was beginning to set in the horizon. Severus leaned in to Hermione and whispered, "Are you ready to go, or shall we stay and continue to dance under the stars."  
  
"I think I'd rather continue dancing with you in private," Hermione smiled, "like the first time."  
  
Severus leaned in and kissed her, "Shall we go then?"  
  
Hermione sighed as she pulled away from his kiss, "I should tend to Samuel one last time. I won't see him again until morning..."  
  
They retrieved Samuel from Madame Pomfrey and retreated into the castle, where they spent a few last minutes with their son before they would retire to their quarters for the evening.   
  
When they returned from the gardens, everybody had gathered around to wish them well one last time. After kissing their son goodnight and handing him over to Elizabeth, Severus swept Hermione into his arms, kissing her tenderly as he carried her off to the dungeons. 


	39. The Greatest Gift

Author's Note: Honeymoon chapter... major R rating here. Oh, and it's not over yet. I'm not sure when I'll post the epilogue... I usually try to update daily so I don't get distracted from writing, but my time might be limited over the weekend. Hopefully, I can get it done before then.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters in the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
Chapter 39 ~ "The Greatest Gift"  
  
When they reached their quarters, Severus gently set Hermione on her feet before closing and warding the door behind him. Hermione smiled seductively as she reached out and grabbed his hand, trying to lead him closer to the bed.  
  
"No," he rasped, "Not yet..." He flicked his wand to dim the lights, so that she was bathed in the glow of the fire.  
  
He looked intensely into her eyes, "I just want to look at you..." his eyes roamed up and down her body, from her glorious mane of hair to her sandaled toes. His hand trembled as he reached out and cupped the back of her head, "You are so beautiful..."  
  
Hermione was nearly trembling in anticipation... all she wanted was for him to touch her. Yet, somehow, just standing her being ravished by his eyes was nearly as intoxicating as his touch. He leaned in and gently kissed her lips, before speaking in a hoarse voice, "When I first saw you today, I thought I was dreaming. You looked... ethereal... like a goddess, or an angel. I just wanted to touch you and make sure that you were real. How can anybody so beautiful love somebody like me?"   
  
His breath on her cheek felt so delicious as he whispered those words to her, "I do love you, Severus..." she rasped.  
  
Slowly, he removed her sheer cape, gently tossing it aside as he turned her around. He lifted her hair off of her shoulders as he embraced her from behind and began kissing the nape of her neck. His warm hands slid up her arms, pausing to caress her bare shoulder before his fingers moved to unbutton the back of her gown. With each open button, he kissed her warm flesh, until he had traced a trail of kisses all the way down her spine to the small of her back. He kissed his way back up to her neck, moving to nibble her shoulders as he slowly moved the strap of her gown down her arm, and kissing his way to her other shoulder as he continued to undress her.  
  
Placing his hands firmly on her waist, he gently spun her back around and began kissing the flesh at the base of her throat as he slid the bodice of her dress further down, exposing her breasts. Hermione threw her head back, and her eyes closed as she allowed him to worship her body. His lips kissed their way down between the valley of her breasts, dropping to his knees as he reached her navel, where he paused as his hands gently slid her gown past her waist and over her hips. When it finally landed in a crumpled heap on the floor, he moaned as he saw that she wore nothing underneath, but for a delicate lace garter around her thigh. He gently caressed her bare back as he slowly kissed his way back up to her neck.  
  
He pulled her to him, lacing his hands into her hair as he tilted her head backwards, and began to ravish her neck once again.  
  
"Severus..." she moaned, her full lips parted as she breathed shallowly.  
  
"Hermione..." he rasped before crushing his lips to hers, and sweeping her into his arms to carry her to the bed. He laid her tenderly on the bed, standing back to look at her intensely, his eyes full of desire, as he began to remove his robes. She reached up to pull him to her, "Let me..." she whispered as her fingers began to unbutton his silk shirt. As he had done with her, she kissed her way through every button, laving a trail of tender kisses down his chest as she bared his torso. Her hands slipped his shirt off over his strong shoulders, exposing the contours of his upper body. She let her hands explore him as he kissed her, before reaching down to unbutton his trousers. She gently pushed them down his thighs with her fingertips, before reaching up with her foot to seductively toe them to his ankles, where he paused for a moment to kick them off.  
  
One of Severus' hands slid down her thigh, caressing it softly as his fingers toyed with the garter that she was wearing. It was torture for Hermione to feel his fingers so close, and she moaned as she urged him on. Slowly, he allowed his hand to slide the garter down past her knee to her calf. He sat back on his knees as he lifted her leg to remove the garter over her foot, before kissing his way up her calf, past her knee, and to her thigh as his other hand reached to touch her intimately.   
  
Hermione tried to pull him back to her, but Severus was intent on taking his time, exploring and kissing every inch of her before claiming her as his wife. He gently spread himself over her, pressing his warm body to hers as he kissed her desperately. Hermione gasped at the feel of his arousal against her inner thigh, and tried to coax him in. Severus gently shook his head and placed a finger to her lips as she whimpered in need. Reaching down to her knees, he gently positioned her legs around him as he continued to tease her, kissing and carressing her until he finally sensed that she could bear no more.  
  
"Hermione..." he rasped as he finally became one with her, "My wife..."  
  
"Oh! Severus!" she cried in passion, tears spilling from her eyes, "I love you!"  
  
They both continued to cry out in their passion, words of love, tears of joy, and when it was all over, Severus clutched her tightly as his voice choked with emotion, "I can't believe that you are mine..."  
  
"I'm yours, Severus... forever."  
  
*****  
  
"Severus," Hermione murmured as she rolled to her side and nestled her back into his warm body, "What made you fall in love with me?"  
  
"Ah... just the question I've been wondering about you, Hermione. I don't know why you love me... but I'm grateful that you do."  
  
Hermione smiled, "I do love you, Severus... very much. I have for a long time."  
  
"How long?"  
  
"I asked you, first."  
  
Severus pulled her closer to him and kissed her, "I love you on so many levels, Hermione. I loved you as Samuel's mother almost from the moment I knew he was my son. You had blessed me with the greatest gift. Over time, that love blossomed into so much more... only, I don't think I realized it until..."  
  
"Until when?"  
  
Severus sighed, "I don't know if I can pinpoint exactly when I fell in love with you, Hermione. I began to love you as a friend when you first moved in here. I treasured every moment we shared together, and hated myself for hurting you so many times." He paused, deep in thought for a moment before he continued, "I suppose I started feeling attracted to you the first time that we fell asleep together on the sofa in the nursery. You haunted my dreams for so long after that," he moaned, "It was torture! But the most pleasant kind of torture I have ever endured."  
  
"When did it become more than attraction?"  
  
"I think..." he paused, "I think I truly fell in love with you when we danced, only I didn't recognize it as love until much later. All I knew was that I wanted to hold you in my arms like that forever."  
  
"Me too..." Hermione murmured.  
  
"Your turn," he nudged her.  
  
"Last year..." she sighed.  
  
Severus frowned, "You've loved me that long?"  
  
"I think so... but I didn't know it. All I knew was that I saw another side of you that night, during and after the battle. But at the time, I thought I was only infatuated with the image of my 'knight in shining armor'. I had to bury that image, it hurt so much for so long, because I was certain that you would never love me the way I yearned to be loved. Every time I started to think of you that way, I'd push the image farther away and try to convince myself that it was just a silly fantasy."  
  
"But then... Samuel was born. And I got to know the real you. Suddenly, I couldn't imagine life without you, Severus."  
  
"I still couldn't admit it to myself at the time, Severus. But now I know that I loved you, even then," she smiled, "But it was the night of the Valentine's ball, for sure, when I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was in love with you. I just didn't think you did, or ever would, love me that way. I guess that is why I over-reacted when I thought you were only in it for the weekend. I should have known you better than that, Severus. I should never have stormed out like that... I should have had more faith in you."  
  
"I'm sorry, Severus," she rasped as she finished.  
  
"I'm not," he tightened his arms around her, "It took you walking out on me to make me realize what I would have lost if I let you go. I might have fallen in love with you on the night of the ball, but I refused to admit it to myself. I knew, when you walked out that door, that I had lost the best thing that had ever happened to me."  
  
"The best?" she smiled.  
  
"Well... maybe second best," he teased, "The other, being Samuel. If not for him, we wouldn't have found each other."  
  
"You think not?" Hermione frowned.  
  
"Let's not dwell on what might have been, Hermione. Here and now, we are together. I love you, Hermione Snape!"  
  
"Severus," Hermione murmured, "I have a gift for you."  
  
He spooned her closer to him as he kissed the back of her shoulder, "What more could you give me, Hermione? You've already given me everything I could ever want... give me anything more, and I don't think I could bear it," his lips moved to her neck, "besides, I haven't got a gift for you."  
  
"You've already given me a gift," she smiled.  
  
He whispered, "And what would that be, love?"  
  
"The same gift that I give to you," she replied as she grabbed his hand and held it close to her abdomen. His warm fingers caressed her as he gasped, "Are you...?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
He rolled her over to face him, kissing her passionately, "Are you sure?"  
  
"Nearly positive," she replied as she returned the kiss with just as much passion, "Do you like it?" she smiled teasingly.  
  
"Ha!" Severus laughed as his eyes glittered with tears, "It's the most incredible gift you could have given me, Hermione," he shook his head, "No... the second most incredible. You've already given me a son."  
  
"Do you want another son, or a daughter?"  
  
"As long as it's a gift from you, either will be fine."  
  
Hermione began to kiss him, urging him to make love to her again.  
  
He looked at her and smirked, "What are you doing? We don't need to try anymore..." he teased her.  
  
"Then we'll just keep practicing for next time," she smiled.  
  
"Next time? How large of a brood do you intend to bless me with, love?" he chuckled.  
  
"Oh... maybe a dozen," she smiled mischievously.  
  
"Hermione! I'm not a young man anymore..."  
  
"What happened to that 'randy teenager' you likened yourself to earlier this afternoon?" Hermione teased. As Severus groaned, Hermione let out an exaggerated sigh, "I guess we'll settle for two, then."  
  
Severus smiled, "In that case, then I think a daughter would be nice. Then we'll have one of each," he paused, "But, I suppose you're right... we should keep practicing, in case we change our minds."  
  
He reached out and pulled her to him, kissing her deeply as they celebrated the new life that they had created through their love. 


	40. Epilogue

Author's Note: The epilogue was supposed to be very fluffy... and it still is, but I had to end it with a bit of suspense to lead us into the sequel. Hopefully, I will have the first chapter of the sequel ready to go in a couple of days.  
  
Thank you, everyone, for reading... for reviewing... for all of your encouragement and inspiration! I hope to see you all again when I begin the sequel, and maybe at my Yahoo group if you would like to stop by and chat.  
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the series are copyright JK Rowling. They are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.  
  
*****  
  
"Honestly, Severus!" Hermione tried to supress a laugh, "A cauldron?"  
  
"And what, may I ask, is wrong with it?" Severus tried to scowl at her, but had a hard time keeping a smile from tugging at the corners of his mouth.  
  
"Who in the world gives their child a cauldron for his first birthday?" Hermione couldn't contain her laughter any longer.  
  
He shrugged his shoulders, "But, it's been enchanted... to simulate a simmering potion! And look at Samuel... he LIKES it!" he pointed emphatically to his son, who was sitting on the floor, entranced by the realistic sound of a simmering potion that the caudron was emmitting, along with small puffs of misty steam.  
  
Hermione shook her head in amusement. *Leave it to Severus to enchant a cauldron to be used as a toy,* she smiled to herself.  
  
"And I suppose... you plan on... teaching... our son... to..." she choked through her laughter, "bottle fame... brew glory..." she couldn't continue as tears leaked out of the corner of her eyes.  
  
Severus smirked, "I would rather give my son something... educational," he paused and pointed to the toy broomstick that Samuel had clutched tight in his fist, "than something like THAT deathtrap! What was Potter thinking?"  
  
Remus and Elizabeth were smiling at their banter as Hermione responded, "It's not as if it can fly, Severus. It only hovers a few inches off the ground. Besides, it's enchanted to keep the child from falling off!"  
  
Severus smirked, "That would come in quite handy, if Samuel's flying abilities are anything like his mother's!"  
  
Hermione playfully punched him as Remus laughed, "And it's not too early for him to learn to fly properly, if Slytherin ever hopes to win the Quidditch cup again!"  
  
Severus scowled, his House team hadn't been playing very well this term, and he didn't appreciate being reminded of that.  
  
"Who says my son will be a Slytherin?" Hermione stamped her foot indignantly before reaching for another present for her son to open. As the child tore through the gift wrap, Remus smiled in amusement as Severus moaned, " 'Hogwarts: A History'? He's a bit young for that, is he not?"  
  
Hermione glared at him, "It's never too early to read to your child. Besides," she smirked in satisfaction, "It's NOT just any copy of 'Hogwarts: A History'... it's 'Hogwarts: A History, Children's Edition'... it's for ages five and under. Look! It even has enchanted pop-up pictures!" As she took the book out of Samuel's hands and flipped it open, a page folded outward in the shape of the castle, lights were twinkling in every window.  
  
Samuel quickly abandoned his cauldron and broomstick, and reached out for the book. Severus tutted to him, "If you want that book, you must walk to your mother to get it!" He reached down and allowed Samuel to grasp tightly to his finger as the child tottered a couple of steps to his mother. "Very good, Samuel," he smiled. Each day brought his son closer and closer to taking a step on his own. Samuel plopped down onto the floor as he grabbed the book from his mother's hands. He looked up in satisfaction, looking so much like his father as an expression that nearly passed for a smirk crossed his face. Severus settled onto the sofa next to Hermione and placed his hand on her abdomen, "And how is our little one enjoying the party?"  
  
"Wanting to join us, I think... the little dear is kicking up quite a storm in there," Hermione smiled as she felt a twitch of movement, "See?"  
  
"Indeed," Severus smiled as he felt it too, and leaned in to whisper, "Just a few more weeks, little one."  
  
After missing out on Hermione's first pregnancy, Severus was thoroughly enjoying every moment anticipating the arrival of their second child. In bed at night, he would fall asleep with his hand gently caressing the swell of Hermione's abdomen, smiling in delight at every movement of the child within.  
  
Remus had moved to sit on the floor with Samuel, and was now entertaining him with a child-sized fake wand that had been a gift from Ron. No doubt that it was one of the twins' creations... it spouted red and gold streamers with every wave. Samuel laughed in delight as Remus gently tickled him with the streamers.  
  
"Re!" he giggled, making Remus grin.  
  
"That's right, Samuel... Re... Re-mus... Remus."  
  
"Re!"  
  
Severus scowled, "He can't manage a Pa... or a Da... or even a Fa, for Father. No... but he can say 'Re'," he sneered.  
  
"He hasn't said 'ma' yet, either... " Hermione sighed, reaching to pat Severus' hand, "Though, I think he might have been trying to say 'Sev' this afternoon..."  
  
Severus smiled, "That will do just fine."  
  
They spent the rest of the evening celebrating Samuel's birthday before Hermione reminded Severus that Christmas was approaching, "We should decorate a tree!"  
  
"Tonight? It's too early for that!" Severus furrowed his brow.  
  
"It's only a few weeks away, Severus," Hermione smiled, "Besides, I want to have it done before I'm too big to move around anymore! Look at me!" she waved her hand towards her abdomen as she shook her head and sighed, "I wasn't nearly this big with Samuel..."  
  
"You look beautiful, Hermione," Elizabeth assured her.  
  
"Radiant," Remus added.  
  
"They are absolutely right, you know," Severus whispered in her ear.  
  
Blushing in embarassment, Hermione waved them off and changed the subject, "So, how about that tree? We could do it for Samuel's birthday... it will be our first family tradition!"  
  
"What do you think, son?" Severus looked down to Samuel, who smiled as he began banging on his caudron with the fake wand, thumping out a rythym as if it were a drum.  
  
"I think that is a yes, Severus," Elizabeth smiled.  
  
"Very well, then," Severus sighed as he rose to his feet, pulling out his wand with every intent of conjuring a tree.  
  
"Not with magic!" Hermione squeaked.  
  
"Whyever not?"  
  
"It's no fun that way!" she replied indignantly.  
  
"If you think I am going to spend the rest of my son's birthday out in this weather trying to chop down a tree without magic..." he scowled.  
  
Hermione raised her hands in defeat, "Point taken. Fine, conjure a tree, but the rest we do without magic!" she demanded.  
  
Severus waved his wand, and an impressive evergreen appeared before them. Before they could get started on the decorations, they heard a popping sound in the fireplace. They all turned to see the face of the Headmaster peering in at them. They all looked at each other, sensing that something bad was about to happen.  
  
Not only was it unusual for Albus to appear in their fire, but they knew that he wouldn't disrupt their son's first birthday celebration unless it was serious.  
  
Severus approached the fire, kneeling down to look into Albus' eyes. It was then that he noticed the Headmaster's grim expression.   
  
"Excuse the intrusion, Severus. You know that I wouldn't if it weren't urgent," he shook his head, looking regretful.  
  
"What is it, Albus?" Severus asked, the concern in his voice quite apparent.  
  
Albus spoke quietly, so that none but Severus could hear. As Albus' head disappeared from the fire, Severus shot to his feet and whirled around, "Lupin! The headmaster's office, immediately!" he growled as he pulled on his robes and turned to Hermione, his eyes full of regret, "I'm sorry, Hermione..."  
  
"Severus...?" she asked nervously.  
  
He leaned in and kissed her, "We'll be right back. You and your mother go ahead and take care of that tree!" He tried to smile in reassurance, but failed miserably.  
  
As the men hurriedly rushed out the door, Elizabeth rushed to Hermione and gathered her into her arms. "What do you think...?"  
  
"I don't know, Mum... but it must be bad. I haven't ever seen Severus react like that before," Hermione moaned, "Why tonight? Samuel's first birthday... why?" she sniffed back her tears, "I'm not going to cry. No... not on Samuel's day," she squatted down on the floor to scoop him up into her arms, but couldn't get back to her feet. She allowed herself to collapse onto the floor with him, where she leaned against the sofa, stroking his hair as he curled up in her lap.   
  
Moments later, he had fallen asleep, and Elizabeth reached down for him, carrying him off to the nursery for the night. When she returned, she took her daughter into her arms and they sat on the sofa waiting for the men to return.  
  
*****  
  
Nearly an hour later, the door opened with a bang, and Severus rushed in, trailed by Remus. He rushed to Hermione and pulled her into his arms, "I'm sorry, Hermione..."  
  
"What is it, Severus?" she asked, near tears.  
  
Severus looked to Remus, who had gently pulled Elizabeth into his arms to reassure her. They shared a knowing look, and Remus nodded as Severus took a deep breath and turned back to his wife to answer her question.  
  
"The security at Azkaban has been breached," he replied in a hoarse voice.  
  
"What? How? And what does this have to do with you?"  
  
"Nobody knows how... and luckily, they got it under control before a large scale breakout occurred..."  
  
"But?" Hermione sensed that there was more.  
  
"But, one prisoner has not been located."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Lucius Malfoy," he rasped.  
  
"But I thought he was..." Hermione gulped, "dead..."  
  
"So did we... but it was all a cover up..." he whispered as he stepped away from her, running his fingers wearily over his eyes, "It's quite a long story, Hermione. I'd rather not go into it right now..."  
  
"But Severus, I still don't understand... WHAT does this have to do with you?"  
  
Severus ushered her back to sit on the sofa before he explained. "Lucius Malfoy... blames me..." he took a deep breath, "for being a traitor... for turning his son against the Dark Lord... and for putting him in Azkaban."  
  
He heard Hermione's sharp intake of breath, and pulled her into his arms, "Hermione... He's a dangerous man. I fear for you and our son. You will not be safe until he is back in Azkaban..."  
  
"And you intend to be the one to put him there?" Hermione asked fearfully. Shaking her head, she whispered, "No! You can't go! It's too dangerous, Severus!"  
  
"I am the only one who can!"  
  
"Why, Severus! Why does it have to be you?"  
  
"Because I know how he thinks, Hermione. And I know his hideouts as well as he does. And," he paused as he looked deep into her eyes, "I need to do it for Draco."  
  
"Draco?"  
  
"If his father is after revenge, he won't hesitate to go after his 'traitor' son as well."  
  
Hermione was sobbing by now, "When do you need to go?"  
  
Severus looked to Remus before answering. Remus was still holding Elizabeth, who's eyes were wide with horror. She had never known how truly dangerous men like Lucius Malfoy were... but she could sense the fear in the room. Remus closed his eyes and kissed her on the temple, as Severus turned back to Hermione and replied, "Tonight."  
  
"But Severus!"  
  
"Please understand, Hermione. I need to do this for you... for Samuel..." he placed his hand over her abdomen, "and for the baby. I need to keep you... ALL of you... safe."  
  
"We'll be safer if you are HERE... with US!" she cried.  
  
"I'll be back before you know it, love," he assured her.  
  
"Remus," Hermione turned to the werewolf, "Don't let him do this... tell him not to go..."  
  
"I'm going, as well," Remus replied.  
  
*****  
  
After quickly packing some light supplies, Severus and Remus bid the women a tearful goodbye, promising to be back and assuring them that they would be fine. Severus left strict instructions for Hermione to NOT leave Hogwarts. She would be safe as long as she was within the safety of the castle grounds. Remus encouraged Elizabeth to stay there, as well. "For Hermione's sake," he told her... but he was concerned about her safety, too. As a member of the Order, ultimately responsible for Voldemort's downfall, Remus could be a possible target of Malfoy's revenge, and he didn't want Elizabeth caught in the middle.  
  
"We'll be back before you know it," Remus assured them.  
  
Severus pulled Hermione and Samuel into his arms, "I love you... both of you..." he smiled as he reached to caress their unborn child, "All three of you."  
  
"We love you, too..." Hermione sobbed before kissing him goodbye. She reluctantly pulled away and rasped, "Be careful... both of you."  
  
She clung tight to her mother as they stood there and watched the men they both loved walk away, praying that they would return safely.  
  
To Be Continued....  
  
*****  
  
Just wanted to add an end note for anyone who might have scrolled through the author's notes... YES, there will be a sequel! I wouldn't be so evil as to end the story like this if I didn't plan on continuing my writing. Watch for the sequel to be posted within the next couple of days!  
  
Thank you one and all for seeing this through to the end. :) 


End file.
